August 29th, 2012
Hey. I know it’s been a while. I’m gonna be honest, I forgot about you. After the farm, we were always moving. I swear that we’re all so high strung that someone is going to snap eventually. Everyone’s been fighting, especially Sirius and Regulus. I’ve tried getting in the middle of it, but it never ends well.
But something happened. Something good. We found a prison. Mom thinks that we can make it into a home. She says we can grow crops in the field, find pigs and chickens, stop running, stop scavenging. It seems almost too good to be true. Everyone’s been hesitant to trust it; Regulus especially. Sirius and Remus have settled in; I’m just thankful that they’re kissing instead of constantly bickering. Those months when they were fighting were pure hell. If only Regulus and Sirius could start getting along now.
I woke up in my own bed yesterday. My own bed in my own room. But I’ve been keeping my backpack. Keeping my gun close. I’ve been afraid to get my hopes up thinking we can actually stay here. The thing is, I’ve been starting to get afraid that it’s easier just to be afraid. But this morning Mom said something. If you don’t have hope, what’s the point of living? So I unpacked my bag and I found you. So I’m gonna start writing in you again. And I’m gonna write this down now because you should write down wishes to make them come true. We can live here. We can live here for the rest of our lives.
***
“We should do something.” James says, looking up from the journal that he had completely forgotten about again.
It’s so quiet that he can hear the gentle whistle of the late evening breeze, the only sound cutting through it is the steady pass of metal as Regulus rhythmically sharpens his knife. He hasn’t spoken a word in hours.
Looking down at the journal in his hands, James is tempted to read it aloud to point out the irony of his words. What happened only a year ago feels like decades now. The memories of the last time he saw his parents flashes through his mind and he physically tries to shake the memory away.
Now isn’t the time to fall apart.
“We should do something.” James repeats, needing to fill the restless silence in his head.
The black curls of Regulus’s hair are the only thing James can spot in the dim light of their dying fire. He continues sharpening his knife, seemingly unable to hear James.
“We can’t have been the only survivors. There’s no way.” James tries again, a desperate edge to his voice.
And then finally, finally James is met with the familiar mossy green of Regulus’s eyes. They catch the light of their small fire, and all the air left in James’s lungs evaporates in one harsh exhale. Despite everything; their days spent running in the wilderness, their lack of showers, and their sparse diet since going on the run, Regulus still looks beautiful.
“It’s in our best interest to act as if everyone is dead.” Regulus says, his tone dull and lifeless. “The hope will kill you.”
James chews on his lower lip. Regulus can’t actually think that, can he? Sirius is still out there, likely looking for Regulus at this very moment. James hadn’t seen anyone die except for–well, except for his own parents.
He almost leaves their conversation at that. He’s so exhausted that he can’t believe he’s even managed to talk for this long. But there’s a nagging voice in the crevice of James’s subconscious, the voice taking on the form of his mother.
Hope is the only thing we have left. What’s the point of life without hope?
Effie’s whole philosophy was built off hope. And to hear Regulus contradict it so harshly, when they didn’t know who made it out… Well, it’s too much for James to handle right now.
“That’s not true.” James mutters, cringing at the wobble in his voice. “Hope is what keeps you going, Reg. It’s what keeps me going. It’s what–” James breaks off, shaking his head.
It’s what kept my mom and dad going. It’s how they led us all to that prison in the first place.
Regulus looks at James in a way that makes him think that Regulus can read his mind. And maybe he can. James has never been the type to hide his emotions, even in the fucked-up world they now live in, with the undead crawling everywhere.
The silence grows between them for so long that James is tempted to stand and walk the perimeter of their camp one more time, if only to give himself something to do. Sitting here in silence will only bring on memories from their last day at the prison, and he really doesn’t want to think about that yet.
“In my experience, even before the turn, hope was my downfall. I hoped that my mother would love me, I hoped that Sirius wouldn’t leave, and I hoped that we could be a real family someday. I was wrong.” Regulus says eventually, his gaze steadfast on the fire before him. “But that was my life. My experiences. I don’t hope anymore because it never got me anywhere. And I would recommend that you follow suit after what happened.” To your parents, he doesn’t say.
James’s heart drops, the corners of his mouth twitching downward. “You think?”
Regulus nods, his expression solemn. “Yes.” He says before standing up. “I’ll take first watch. Get some rest.”
The younger boy reaches for his crossbow before walking a few paces away, sitting on the outskirts of their camp with his bow across his lap. James ignores the pang of disappointment at the abrupt end to their conversation.
He shouldn’t expect anything else. James and Regulus had spoken less than five words to each other before the prison was attacked, and not much has changed in the couple of days they’ve been on the road together.
The first night they were cramped in the trunk of a car, oxygen shallow, both sweating like no tomorrow as they listened to the horde of dead pass them. It was only hours after he’d watched his parents die, and he was still in shock. Their silence felt natural then, as James couldn’t imagine anything being worth talking about in those circumstances.
But now, many days later, they’re deep in the woods, the only living creatures around them being the birds that fly above or the occasional squirrel or raccoon that Regulus shoots with his bow for them to cook.
And James needs a distraction.
“No.”
Regulus’s head swivels around to look at James, his eyebrows crinkled together with confusion. “What?”
“No. I’m not doing this.” James says, standing up and stalking over to Regulus, his entire body alight with agitation, his hands shaking. “I won’t pretend like they’re all dead. I won’t give up. That’s not who I am.”
Regulus’s eyes are wide, and James realizes that he’s never acted this stern with anyone before. He never raises his voice, even when he and Sirius had been attacked by walkers and Sirius was cussing him out left, right, and sideways, James had kept his cool. He didn’t yell.
But this is different.
“We are going to track them down. You’re a tracker, right? That means you can help me find them. We’ll find your brother and Remus, they were the last I saw leave the prison. They couldn’t have gone far.” James says, gesturing wildly with his hands. “We’re not giving up, Reg. We can’t. I can’t do that right now.”
Regulus has a strange expression on his face, his eyes darting between James’s face and lower with a frantic sort of energy. His mouth opens and closes a few times and James patiently waits it out.
After what feels like an eternity of staring, Regulus finally nods. “Okay.”
James narrows his eyes disbelievingly. “Okay?”
Regulus nods again. “Okay, James. We’re not giving up. We’ll track the others. Come on.” He says, standing and gathering their few belongings.
Not quite believing that it worked, James watches Regulus move for a long moment, too shocked to move. It’s only when those mossy eyes are glaring over at him that he gets moving. He hastily packs up his journal and canteen into his backpack before double checking that he has his knife and gun. Satisfied, he looks back to the younger boy, who is stomping out the remains of their fire.
Moments later, they’re on their feet and tracking the others into the early hours of the morning.
***
“Okay, so the berries mean that someone’s recently been here, clearly looking for food.” James says, smiling at the first clue they’ve found so far.
Regulus says nothing, his calculated eyes focused on the dirt beneath their feet. Watching Regulus track is almost mesmerizing with the way his eyebrows scrunch together and his teeth sink into his bottom lip.
He is so achingly beautiful, James’s traitorous thoughts voice, causing him to wince. His feelings for Regulus are his most well-kept secret. A secret that he intends to take to the grave, if necessary.
It doesn’t have anything to do with denial; he was out and proud of his sexuality before the turn, and he doesn’t try to hide his attraction to both genders. However, James is beyond petrified of Regulus’s reaction if he ever found out about James’s feelings.
Regulus has been cold since the day that they met. They’d all met by accident; James and his parents had traveled with a nice couple, Arthur and Molly, they’d met on that first day of the outbreak. It was on the fourth day that the five of them found other people.
***
“Quiet, son. Not sure if these are good or bad people.” Monty said, his eyes darting this way and that, waiting to see if they could catch any conversation from the group outside.
James, Effie, Monty, Molly, and Arthur were all camped out in a rundown RV they’d found on the side of the road. They’d been there for two days with no other human contact, until this day.
“I swear to fucking god, Sirius, you did not check the entire perimeter of this place.” A snarly voice said from the other side of the highway.
James’s head tilted as he tried to determine the age of the voice. It sounded like a boy, probably around James’s own age, maybe a couple years younger. The foul language had James’s own lips twitching into a grin. He longed to peek out the window to catch a glimpse of the boy.
“Please by all means, Reg, check it again. No one’s gonna fuckin’ stop you.” Came another voice from a much closer vicinity.
There was a loud huffing sound and stomping steps for a few minutes. James and the rest of the people in the RV held their breaths as they waited for the group to pass.
They weren’t so lucky, though.
Seconds later, the door to the RV swung open and smacked directly into James’s nose.
“ Fuck!” James wailed, his hand rose to clutch at his nose as blood began pouring out of it.
“Oh, what the fuck!” the boy on the other side of the door said.
James coughed and gagged on his own blood for a moment before he lifted his eyes to the perpetrator. The sight that greeted him was as unexpected as it was thrilling.
Wow, James thought stupidly, he’s beautiful.
He had these eyes that reflected the midday sunlight so beautifully that it was near debilitating. The boy had black hair that curled around his ears and he was covered in what looked to be a mixture of gore, blood, and dirt. He held a large crossbow in his hands, aimed right for the center of James’s chest, which ought to scare him, but he was much too distracted by the boy’s beauty to mind his own safety.
“Okay, okay, everyone calm down.” Monty said, stepping out of the RV with his hands up. “No need to get all worked up, we’ll come out. We don’t want any trouble.”
“How many of you are there?” The boy asked, his mouth pulled into a thin line as he gestured something with his right hand.
“There are five of us. My wife and son there,” Monty gestured to where James and Effie were exiting the RV and coming to stand by him. “And two companions we found a few days ago.”
James noticed a group of others quickly running over to them and braced for the worst. If this was how he was going to die, then he hoped the boy with the crossbow would be the one to do it.
“Regulus! Are you okay?” Another boy ran over, looking so similar to the boy that James now knew as Regulus that they had to be related in some way. “Are you hurt?”
“I’m fine.” Regulus said, his hold on the crossbow never wavering as he continued to aim it at Monty. “Nice check of the perimeter, Sirius. I’ll be sure to let you do it again next time.”
Sirius rolled his eyes before he smacked Regulus on the side of his head. “You’re such a shit.”
Another boy approached them, his scarred face coming into view, followed by a group of two other boys and four girls. They all looked to be around James’s age as well, and by their looks, they were all friends before the turn.
“We don’t want trouble either.” The boy with the scars said. “We’re just passing through. Trying to find shelter and food.”
Monty exhaled, his posture relaxing a bit. James followed suit, still keeping a tight hold of his still-bleeding nose. “We’ve got food in here. If you’d all like to share it, we’d be happy to.” Monty said.
The group all seemed to consider that, most of them shrugging easily. The only one that still seemed suspicious was Regulus, who still held the crossbow aloft. His gaze turned on James, causing the air to whoosh out of him. “Is it broken?” he asked, his eyes trained firmly on James’s face.
Startled and a bit flustered, James removed his hand from his nose and tried scrunching it. Relieved to find that he could move it and it wasn’t broken, James grinned. “Nah. Looks worse than it feels.”
Regulus is quiet for a moment, his eyes tracing James’s face. “Your glasses are crooked.”
Startled, James slowly rights the glasses on his face. “Oh. Uh, thanks.”
Regulus didn’t respond, but after a moment, he lowered the crossbow and turned to Sirius and the rest of the group. They whispered between themselves for a few minutes, and Effie tore off a piece of her shirt to help James clean the blood off his face in the meantime. When the group turned back to them, they all wore similar expressions of hesitant trust.
“We’ll join you.” Regulus said, his eyes trained on James again. “For now.”
James couldn’t help the way his mouth twitched upward into a smile.
Monty took control of the situation and had everyone introduced and friendly in minutes. James met Remus, Evan, Barty, Lily, Dorcas, Mary, and Marlene, and soon enough, their groups combined into one. While everyone else seemed to warm to him quickly, Regulus remained on the outskirts of every conversation, only seen talking to Sirius–whom James found out was his older brother by a year–or Dorcas, the girl with a samurai sword and long locs.
And James knew from that day on that he was a goner for Regulus. He didn’t mind.
***
“Lily loves blueberries, it could have very well been her.” James argues as they continue walking through the forest.
Regulus hums noncommittally. It drives James up the wall.
“Whatever. I know you think they’re all dead.” James snaps, walking over to the blueberry bush and picking them. “I’m not giving up hope. They’ll be hungry when we find them.”
There’s a long moment of silence that’s filled with James’s aggressive picking of the berries. He belatedly realizes that he doesn’t have anything to put them in and is seconds away from throwing them on the ground in frustration, but is stopped by a gentle prodding on his upper arm. Glancing to his right, he finds Regulus holding out the bandana he usually keeps tied around his belt loop. It’s dirty and covered in a mixture of dirt and whatever else Regulus needs to wipe from his face on a daily occasion, but it’s the only thing they’ve got.
James gingerly grasps the bandana, his expression grateful as he deposits the berries into it and ties it up. Regulus says nothing, only continuing on the path he’s been leading them on for the past few hours. They end up stumbling upon train tracks, and James perks up when he sees what looks to be people, but deflates when he realizes it’s a pack of walkers, four of them feasting together on the ground.
James freezes at the sight of them, his last moments in the prison ringing through his mind in a dizzying blur. Regulus shoots them in seconds before walking over and viciously pulling the arrows out of their heads with a dark expression. In the center of their pile is what looks to be the remains of a human body, though it’s too large to be any of their missing friends.
Their silence grows almost unbearable and James is desperate to break it. He’s frustrated with himself for freezing in sight of danger, at his dislike for killing walkers even now. He can tell Regulus is thinking the same, how burdened he is to be stuck with James. He probably wishes he were with his brother, who never hesitates to kill anyone; human or walker. James still hasn’t killed another human. He doesn’t think he’ll be able to.
His gaze is glued to the dead body, and he can’t help the tears that start to fall down his cheeks. He’s tired and frustrated and ashamed of himself, and he misses his parents.
Regulus walks ahead of him, and James wipes his eyes and continues following.
***
Hours later, they gave up on tracking after the trail went cold. They’re looking for food and somewhere to shack up for the night when James breaks their silence. “I need a drink.”
Regulus’s head shoots up from where he’s been quietly surveying the forest for anything they could eat. “A drink?”
“An alcoholic drink. A strong one.” James says sagely, so tired that he can feel it in his bones.
Despite everything, their tension, their arguments, Regulus’s lips twitch into the first semblance of a smile that James has seen in a long time. “You want us to scour for alcohol? In the zombie apocalypse when we can barely find any food?”
James shivers as he tries to memorize the small smile on Regulus’s face. “Yeah. Why the fuck not?”
Regulus’s eyes bulge, which makes James crack a smile. James is usually the type to refrain from cussing unless he was in the heat of the moment. On contrary to Regulus, Sirius, and Remus, who all seemed to swear every other word.
Eventually, Regulus nods. “Okay. Alcohol. Let’s go.”
Delighted by Regulus’s easy acceptance, James readily follows in whatever direction Regulus leads them in. They walk and walk, continuing even as the sun starts to beat down on them in the afternoon light. They nearly give up to rest when they stumble across a large sign that reads, “Redding Grove Country Club”.
“They’ll likely have something. A wine cellar, maybe.” Regulus shrugs. “It’s worth a shot.”
James nods and they begin to walk across the large golf course towards the rundown clubhouse. They find a window that’s unlocked and both take turns climbing through, holding their respective weapons high as they check each room. They split up to check opposite sides, slowly making their way through the large building. James finds a few stray walkers and kills them easily enough with his knife. He’s always hated killing the walkers, but it is a necessity that can’t be avoided anymore. He had to get over it a long time ago.
As he’s checking the last couple rooms, he stumbles across the kitchen and subsequently, the alcohol. To James’s dismay, there only looks to be one bottle of red wine left. With a sigh, he rises up on his toes to snatch it off the top shelf, his fingers just grasping it when a figure appears in his periphery.
The snarling is the only thing he registers before he’s smashing the bottle on the shelf and using the sharp edge to drive into the walker’s forehead. He has to try a few times before its eyes roll back and it sags to the ground.
Panting, he blinks a few times to shake himself out of the shock his body had gone into. A few moments later, Regulus comes rushing in, his eyes wild. “Are you okay? I heard fighting.”
James smiles. “All good. That one caught me by surprise, but no harm done.” He gestures to the walker crumpled at their feet. “I did waste the only bottle of alcohol I managed to find, though.”
Regulus eyes the broken bottle shard still in his hand and jerks his head in the direction he’d come from. “Come on, I think I saw some in the dining room.”
The two of them silently make their way to a large banquet hall. Circular tables with white tablecloths still remained in the room, and it looked as if not many people had been through here before. James spots the bar in the corner of the room and makes a beeline for it.
The wooden bar is covered in dust and broken glasses. He realizes with dismay, that there only looks to be one bottle of alcohol left, tucked away in the back of a shelf, forgotten. He snatches it, holding it up to the light to try and read it. He grimaces, seeing the words ‘Peach Schnapps’ etched across the bottle.
“What’s with the face?” Regulus asks, now sitting on a stool at the bar.
“It’s peach schnapps.” James says, dismayed and wincing. “I’m allergic to peaches.”
Regulus snorts, and James sends him a harsh glare.
“I’m sorry,” Regulus wheezes, not sounding the least bit sorry. “You’re not missing much. Peach schnapps is disgusting.”
“It’s the only thing left.” James says, realizing with horror that he’s close to breaking down again. Over peach schnapps. What is his life.
“And that’s reason enough for us to find somewhere else.” Regulus says, his lips twitching. “No one should ever be subjected to peach schnapps.”
And despite everything, despite the hellish few weeks he’s had, with his parents’ deaths, the prison falling, his and Regulus’s stoic companionship and subsequent truce, James finds himself… smiling.
“It’s that bad?” James asks.
“It is.” Regulus says, his face a mixture of humor and disgust. “Be glad your first drink in the zombie apocalypse won’t be that. Come on.” He jerks his head towards the door.
“I’m so glad.” James says, rolling his eyes as he grabs his backpack from the ground and slings it over his shoulder, following Regulus out the door.
***
Hours later, the sun has started to set and Regulus has led them to a run-down shack. That’s the best term that James can come up with. It’s not quite a trailer and not quite a cabin, a sort of mixture of both.
“Why are we here?” James asks, so exhausted that he’s sort of given up on his goal of alcohol for today.
Regulus is quiet for a moment as he jimmies the front door, eventually managing to open it without breaking any glass. “There will be alcohol here.”
“How do you know?” James asks, following Regulus as they carefully enter the small space, both on the lookout for walkers or any sign of life.
“I just do.” Regulus shrugs, his eyes focused as he checks the whole space, his crossbow held tightly between his fingers.
When they’ve cleared the place, Regulus starts rummaging around, his mind set on his goal. James pokes around curiously, finding a smashed television, many empty cigarette packs, and his personal favorite find, an ashtray shaped like a pair of boobs. He holds it up, his mouth twisted in a disbelieving smile as he aims it towards Regulus. “Who in their right mind would buy something like this?”
Regulus turns, his eyes scanning the plastic configuration before he continues digging around. “My father, that’s who.”
“Wha–” James gapes, looking around this place with a new mindset. “This is your house?”
“Not my exact one, but a damn near replica.” Regulus shrugs before his eyes light up. “Ha. Knew there’d be somethin’.” He holds up a mason jar filled with what looks to be water.
James furrows his eyebrows, still reeling from Regulus’s confession. “What is it?”
“Moonshine.” Regulus says, looking at James like he’s an idiot.
He moves around the small shack, bringing the mason jar around to a tiny table that’s really only large enough for one person. After they both stare at it for a moment, Regulus chooses to sit cross-legged on the floor, so James does the same.
“Ever drank this before?” Regulus asks while he unscrews the top.
“Nah.” James eyes it wearily, and Regulus raises an eyebrow. “It’s just… my dad always said that bad moonshine could make you go blind.”
Regulus dismisses his comment. “Ain’t nothin’ worth seein’ out there, anyway.” He grumbles before bringing the cup to his lips and taking a sip.
Satisfied that he’s not going to go blind, James takes the cup and swallows a mouthful. He grimaces at the taste, coughing once it’s down. “That’s the worst thing I’ve ever tasted in my life.”
Regulus is laughing at him, his eyes crinkled and his dimples–honest to God, dimples –poking in his cheeks. James is awed by the sight.
“You’re such a wuss.” Regulus manages through his laughter.
James scoffs, but he can’t really be offended when Regulus’s laugh sounds like that. Instead, he lifts his chin and drinks more of the poison. He grimaces again, his nose scrunched up and eyes squeezed closed. Regulus continues laughing, and James idly thinks that this is the happiest he’s felt since the prison fell. Honestly, even before that.
“Stop hoggin’ it.” Regulus says, his laughter calmed down, though the remnants remain in his upturned lips.
James obediently hands the cup over again and Regulus takes a long swig of it. Watching that and feeling the alcohol starting to take effect, an idea dawns on him. “We should play a drinking game.”
Regulus arches an eyebrow, and James traces the movement with his eyes reverently. “What game?”
“Never have I ever?” James suggests.
Regulus snorts. “Alright then. Barty fuckin’ loves this game. Swear last time we played, Evan ended up butt-naked and Barty was pukin’ his guts up till morning.”
“All the more reason to play.” James wiggles his eyebrows.
Regulus holds his gaze for a moment before nodding. “Alright. You go first.”
James nods, thinking for a moment before smirking. “Never have I ever shot a crossbow.”
Regulus’s eyes narrow. “That’s cheap.”
James shrugs. “It’s true.”
Rolling his eyes, Regulus takes a sip of the drink. “Never have I ever worn glasses.”
A grin stretches across James’s face. “Touché.”
The moonshine goes down slightly easier this time, though not by much. He starts to lean against the table on his right side, his body relaxing with the alcohol. “Never have I ever failed a class.”
Regulus arches an eyebrow. “Neither have I.”
That surprises James, but he feels guilty for it immediately. “Oh. Nice. Neither of us drinks then.”
Regulus’s expression is slightly guarded as he speaks again. “Never have I ever dated anyone.”
That throws James for a loop. “Wha–never?”
Regulus shakes his head. James hums. “Huh. Okay. Good one.”
He drinks, barely grimacing this time. “Alright. Never have I ever been arrested.”
Regulus’s lips thin, his expression going cold in less than a second. “That what’cha think of me?”
“Wait, I–”
“What, just cause I grew up in a place like this, I musta been gettin’ arrested and shit?” Regulus says, spitting the words like venom, his eyes dark and glowing all at once. “How’s this? Never have I ever had a real bed before the prison. Never had loving parents. Never relied on no one for nothin’. Never dallied around, writin’ in my journal, too scared to kill damn walkers that’re tryin’ to eat my face off!”
James backs up, his eyes going wide as Regulus roughly pushes himself to his feet. His hands go for the neck of James’s shirt as he yanks him up.
“You’ve never shot a crossbow? How about I teach you?” Regulus snarls, plopping the heavy crossbow in James’s hands as he shoves him to the front door, kicking it open.
“You shouldn’t be yelling, there could be–”
“What? Walkers? This is your prime opportunity, Potter! How about I teach you a thing or two about hunting. Come on.” Regulus pushes James until they’re standing in the front lawn, the world cast in a golden hue around them as the sun sets.
The familiar snarl of a walker sounds to their right, and Regulus walks them in that direction. “Hold it up.”
James, upset and guilty and slightly drunk, holds the bow up.
“Aim and shoot at it. It’s a slow one, you’ll be fine. Maybe you’ll learn a thing or two from someone like me.”
“I didn’t mean it like that.” James whispers.
“The fuck did you mean by it, then?” Regulus yells, raising his voice even more.
“Please stop yelling.” James begs, his hands shaking as he aims and shoots the first arrow, catching the walker in the shoulder.
“Would you look at that? You do have it in you!” Regulus says, his tone mocking and cruel. “Come on, go again. This fucker’s too dumb to do anything.”
“I don’t wanna.” James says, lowering the bow.
Regulus is quiet for a moment before he roughly yanks the bow out of James’s hands. “Fine. I’ll do it myself, like always.”
He stalks towards the walker, shooting it in the chest, pinning it to the tree behind it. He walks closer, shooting another in its other shoulder.
“Regulus, stop.”
“Why? This can be target practice for you.” Regulus says.
Fed up, upset, drunk, and a million other things, James yanks his knife out of its sheath and walks over to stab the walker in the forehead, his own breath coming out in harsh pants. “Stop it! Just stop .”
“What’d you do that for? I was havin’ fun.” Regulus says, his lids drooping and his teeth sharp.
“Killing them isn’t supposed to be fun.” James spits, whirling on Reglus and shoving him back a few steps. “Look, I know what you think of me.”
Regulus doesn’t respond, to no one’s surprise. It seems as though he can’t hear James most of the time.
“I know you think I’m weak. Because I don’t like killing walkers. Cause I’m not like you or Sirius or Remus. You guys all thrive in this–this mess while I…” James shakes his head, tears springing to his eyes. “I hate it. I hate the violence and the fear and I’ve got shit survival skills. I know you think I’m just another dead body you’re obligated to look out for cause you liked my parents but… I’m more than that, okay? I–I care about people.”
Regulus looks up at James, his eyebrows furrowed and his mouth curled into a sneer. “What do you want from me? Please tell me, man, cause I’ve got no fuckin’ clue what you’re talking about.”
“I want you to admit that you fucking feel something! You walk around all stoic, actin’ like nothin’ affects you, like nothing we went through matters .”
“Of course it fucking matters!” Regulus explodes, a vein popping in his forehead as he steps into James’s personal space. “I’m actin’ like this cause I don’t know how you can stand to look at me! What happened to your parents…” Regulus’s voice cracks, his head ducking down in shame for a moment before he stubbornly meets James’s eyes again. “I was out there when it all went down. I was close. And if I’d been quicker, if I’d realized what that bitch was plannin’, then maybe I could’ve–maybe I could’ve done somethin’.”
James’s heart drops, his mouth falling open. His hand goes for his chest, trying to hold all the emotions in.
“You think what happened to them is your fault?” James whispers.
“It is my fault. You guys relied on me to provide, to be a hunter. I should have seen the signs, should have been quicker. But I failed. I failed you, I failed the group, and I failed Effie and Monty and I will never forgive myself for that.” Regulus says, his breaths coming out quick and harsh, tears spilling out of those lovely green eyes.
James stands there for a long moment, long enough that Regulus pivots and begins to walk with his back to James.
Without knowing why or how, James’s body kicks into action as he runs to close the distance again, his arms banding around Regulus’s waist in an iron grip, his chin dropping to rest in the crook of Regulus’s neck, hugging him from behind. The younger boy freezes, his body rigid for a moment before his head tilts toward his clavicle, little sobs emitting from his mouth as James tightens his hold.
“I failed them.” Regulus whispers.
“You didn’t. It’s not on you, Reg. It’s not.” James whispers, tears of his own threatening to spill from his eyes.
“You’re sayin’ that cause you’re you.” Regulus says.
“And who am I?” James questions, trying to switch the subject to something that will stop Regulus from making those awful, heartbreaking sounds.
“Kind.” the word slips from Regulus’s mouth so quietly that James almost doesn’t catch it. “You’re kind.”
Those words sit with them for a long moment before James loosens his hold, gripping Regulus’s shoulders to turn him back around.
“So are you, Regulus Black. You are so much kinder than you know.” James whispers.
***
“I can see why my dad stopped drinking.” James says, his gaze on the starry sky above him.
Regulus, who’d been sitting across from James with his eyes closed, lazily blinks them open. They’re sprawled on the front porch of the shack, choosing to sit in silence after their emotional outburst.
“Your head hurtin’?” Regulus rasps, and James shivers at his tone.
“Nah, I wish I always felt like this.” James smiles. He never drank much before the turn, mainly because Monty hated alcohol with a passion after getting over his addiction. “That’s dangerous.”
Regulus snorts. “You’re lucky you’re a happy drunk.”
“What’re you?”
“An asshole.” Regulus mutters.
“Nah, they ain’t true.” James easily denies.
“No?” Regulus raises his eyebrows, sitting up and leaning closer to James. “Did’ya already forget when I forced you to shoot a walker when you’d been drinking? Or when I smashed your nose in the first time we met?”
James’s smile only grows. “I remember. I’m just sayin’ you’re not an asshole most of the time. Not sayin’ you can’t be one on occasion.”
Regulus snorts, shaking his head. “Smartass.”
James hums. He fidgets with his ragged jeans, picking at the fraying fabric near his ankle before his curiosity gets the better of him. “What were you doin’ before all this?”
Regulus tilts his head. He pauses for a moment, his eyes calculating as he surveys James. Finding whatever he’s looking for, he speaks. “Evan, Barty, and I woulda been graduated by now. We all agreed we’d get the hell outta this place as soon as we could. Wanted to travel to all those fancy places, you know? France, Italy, fucking Greece. Evan is obsessed with Greece.” he speaks with a fond smile. “Could escape my folks, say a huge ‘Fuck you’ to Georgia, and be on my merry way. Didn’t turn out like that, though.”
James watches him intently, hanging onto every word. It’s the most that Regulus has ever said about his past. “Why’d you wanna escape your folks?”
Regulus gives him a look. “Cause they were abusive pieces of shit that blew all their money on drugs and booze. Neither got a single caring bone in their body.”
James isn’t quite brave enough to ask what happened to them after the turn. “Where was Sirius? Before the turn?” he asks instead.
“He went off to college the year before. Made all his fancy friends. Left me there with them.” He says, his eyebrows pulled together. “He came back, though. Fought his way back as soon as that first case of the virus dropped. Ignored all the ‘stay inside’ demands and dragged everyone to come back and get me. That’s how we all ended up together.”
James nods. He’d never known how Regulus’s group had started. He figured they’d all been together before the turn.
“You lied, then.” James says, his mouth moving quicker than his brain can keep up with.
Regulus raises an eyebrow, his gaze unamused. “What do you mean?”
“You said that you never relied on anyone. But you rely on Sirius to be there for you.” James says, his voice coming out a lot steadier than he’s expecting. “You’re saying he rallied all his college friends to not only allow him to travel in the dire state that our country was in during the turn, but he also convinced said friend to come with him . Seems like Sirius loves you a whole lot more than you give him credit for.”
Those words settle over them for a long moment, neither of them saying anything. Finally, Regulus lifts his gaze to meet James’s head-on. “You’re a lot smarter than I gave you credit for.”
“Gee, thanks.” James says sarcastically, those his words lack any bite. “Just what everyone wants to hear.”
“Shut up.” Regulus huffs a laugh, his gaze slightly unfocused as he gazes back out at the night sky. “Just sayin’ you’re observant. You notice shit that most people don’t.”
The words settle over James like a static shock. His cheeks are warm, his palms sweating. Anything that even slightly resembles a compliment coming from Regulus is… well, it’s basically everything that James has ever wanted.
“S’pose.” James shrugs bashfully.
His mannerisms seem to amuse Regulus, whose smile has turned devilish. “No one ever told you that before?”
“Not really.” James admits.
Humming, Regulus nods. They’re silent again for a bit, and James is surprised when Regulus breaks it. “You know what I want?”
James tries to act normal about Regulus’s choice of words. “Hm?”
“A cigarette.” Regulus practically purrs, his gaze dreamy. “The things I’d do for one, god.”
Nose scrunching in disgust, James sends a judgemental look towards the younger boy. “Those things’ll kill you.”
Regulus scoffs. “He says while we’re knee-deep in a world with zombies trying to eat us and people who’ll shoot us just for a damn place to live.”
James opens his mouth to debate that, but finds that he can’t. “Yeah, that’s fair.” he says, smiling again. “I miss warm water.”
Regulus whistles. “Hell yeah.”
“Going to the movie theater.”
“Reading. No time for that anymore.” Regulus says quietly.
“You like reading?” James asks, and Regulus slowly nods. “What’s your favorite book?”
“I loved mysteries. And classics. Used to go to the library every weekend as a kid and make my way through the whole mystery section. A girl tried to check out with ‘Jane Eyre’ one time, I nearly smacked her.”
James chuckles, smiling at the visual of little Regulus tucked away in the corner of a library, surrounded by a pile of books. His entire perception of Regulus’s character changing in his mind, James finds himself piecing different parts of Regulus together. He finds that he likes him even more.
“Hey,” James says, his tone soft and low. “I’m sorry for what I said earlier. About getting arrested. Sometimes my mouth will just say stuff without my brain’s permission, and you really shouldn’t take any of it seriously. I’m an idiot.”
“It’s fine. I get it. You see the environment I grew up in and you make assumptions.” Regulus says, much calmer now. “Not like I’ve been too open about myself, anyway.”
“Yeah, but it was unfair of me. Just know that I’m sorry.”
“Alright.” Regulus nods, his body relaxed as he stares across the porch a bit lazily. “Apology accepted.”
Satisfied, James goes quiet again. They sit there long enough that James starts to nod off a bit, and it startled back awake by a light pressure against his shoe. Regulus’s foot is prodding James’s, his gaze stuck to James’s face with an unreadable expression.
“Shit, sorry.” James rasps, but Regulus waves him off.
“What’s the first thing you wanna do if they ever sort this out?” Regulus asks, gesturing around them with his hand.
James considers that, tapping his chin thoughtfully. “Hm. Traveling Europe sounds fun.” he says, smiling as he references Regulus’s earlier words. “Always wanted to see Scotland.”
Regulus chuckles, the sound low and sending chills down James’s spine. “Mind if I tag along?”
“Nah, don’t mind one bit.” James says, giddy by their conversation. “Always thought traveling would be better with someone else.”
“Cool. It’s a date.” Regulus says, gaze burning James straight to his bones.
Not quite knowing what to say, James flounders for a second. His gaze catches on the house behind them, and his brain supplies an insane idea for him. “We should burn it.”
“Hm?”
“The house. We should burn it. Say a final ‘fuck you’ to your childhood.” James says, praying that Regulus will agree.
He seems to think about it for a second before shrugging. “Fuck it. Why not?” he mumbles before slowly pushing himself to his feet and holding a hand out for James to take.
Minutes later, both of them are pouring bottles of moonshine everywhere. They keep going until it’s all gone, smashing the glasses once they’re empty. Regulus pulls out his metal lighter that he always carries with him, lighting a piece of spare wood that they found outside. “You wanna do the honors?”
James grins. “Hell yeah.” he takes the burning piece and throws it onto the porch.
Regulus throws the final jar of moonshine on the porch, and the entire thing lights up in seconds. They both stand there for a moment, watching it burn. James lifts his right hand in the air, flipping off the tiny house that contained remnants of Regulus’s dark childhood.
Regulus snorts, his eyes amused as he stares at James’s finger. With a teasing smile, James nudges Regulus, urging him to do the same. After a pause and an exaggerated sigh, Regulus’s middle finger is also held high in the air as they both flip off the burning house. And for a moment, when James turns his head and lets his lips loose in a silly grin while the orange hues of the fire reflect in Regulus’s eyes, he’s glad that out of anyone, James had been lucky enough to be with Regulus.
***
Their luck seems to turn when they find the funeral home.
They stumble upon it by complete accident. As they search the area for a suitable place to sleep, they come across an abandoned funeral home. After checking every inch of the place and finding no walkers or humans, they decide its as good a place as any to camp for the night.
James deposits his backpack on the ground and goes over to the fireplace; a luxury for them. “Reg, look! We should find firewood for it.”
Regulus’s lips twitch and he nods after a few seconds. “Alright. We’ll go find some together.”
The woods around them are dark and quiet. Slightly eerie, especially as someone could easily sneak up on them, but ultimately worth it to have a warm fire going as they sleep.
James has collected multiple logs, branches, and leaves when he trips over something on the ground. His hands reflexively drop everything in them as he begins to fall to the ground, coming face-to-face with a head.
A decapitated head. He watches in horror as the eyes peel open and the mouth curls into a snarl as it tries to bite at James’s hands. He jerks them back, scrambling away with a hoarse yell. Regulus is there in seconds, his knife going through the walker’s eye as it stops moving.
They don’t say anything for a moment. James’s mind is spinning, images of Dolores and a sword, the way that she had to hack at his father’s throat three times before his head detached from his body.
He barely has any time to react before he’s hunched over himself and vomiting on the ground below. The memories assault his mind, mixing themselves in a horrifying blur of blood and death. Regulus is saying something, his hand rubbing gently down James’s back, but he can’t process anything except the head still sitting beside James.
The longer that he stares at the head, the more he is reminded of his dad. He desperately tries to keep his cool, he cannot break down right now, not with Regulus, but–
“We’ve all done the worst things just to stay alive, I know that. But we can all come back from that. We can change.” Effie said, her eyes brimming with tears as she pleaded with the woman across the fence, who held up Dorcas’s sword to Monty’s throat.
Dolores, the leader of the neighboring town of Woodbury, pulls the sword back for a moment and James sags in relief as it seemed like she was going to surrender. But moments later, her lips curled up into a snarl as she spat out, “Liar,” and swung the sword directly into Monty’s throat.
The world seemed to slow down for James in that moment. Because the scene he was witnessing, it just didn’t make any sense. His father couldn’t be dead. Not now, not when they’d finally found peace together in their prison. It didn’t make sense.
But then he heard his mother’s agonized screaming, and he knew it was real.
“ No!” Effie wailed before she lifted her gun and shot Dolores directly in the chest.
James stood still in his place on the outskirts of the prison, still watching everything in a daze. And when his mother was shot in the head by one of Dolores’s soldiers, he could do nothing except watch.
There was no way he could lose both of his parents in the same day, right? That just didn’t happen.
But then a hand was grasping his shoulder and someone was screaming and wait–it was his own voice he heard screaming. Screaming these awful, gut-wrenching sobs that were heartbreaking even to him.
“James,” Regulus said, his own eyes filled with tears. “We need to go. I’m so sorry, we need to go.”
Not knowing what else to do, James nodded and followed Regulus. The last thing he saw was all of his friends fighting for their lives, and his parents' corpses lying still on the ground of their home.
–he can’t breathe. The memories are too much, they’re too vivid, the smell of blood is so poignant–
“James, breathe.” a calm voice says into his ear.
He can’t, he can’t breathe–
“Yes, you can. Do it with me.” Regulus says, both of his hands heavy on James’s shoulders as he spins them so they’re face-to-face. “Come on, breathe with me.”
James reluctantly follows Regulus’s instructions, trying to breathe in a few times before he’s successful, his vision full of mossy green and gold, his fingers itching to reach out and feel the dark curls of Regulus’s hair.
“That’s good. One more time.” Regulus murmurs, his thumbs rubbing in gentle circles where they rest on James’s shoulders.
If he were in his right mind, he might’ve blushed at the quiet, intimate tone Regulus is using, but he can still smell blood, the screams still banging around his mind in incessant circles.
“I–” James chokes out, tears still slipping down his face. “I’m–”
“Shh…” Regulus soothes, shaking his head. “It’s okay. Tell me later.”
James crumples forward at those words, his forehead resting in the crook of Regulus’s neck as he cries and cries. He hasn’t allowed himself to cry yet, and it’s obvious in the force of his sobs that it was long overdue. Regulus says nothing, only raising his arms until they’re fully enveloped around James.
“They’re gone.” James whispers miserably.
“I know,” Regulus whispers back, his tone ragged. “I’m so sorry.”
James sags further into Regulus and they don’t speak again for a long time.
***
James sleeps fitfully that night despite the warmth from the fireplace and the comforting presence of Regulus beside him. He dreams of his parents and everyone at the prison, pleasant dreams for a short while before they distort into nightmares and he’s reliving his parents’ deaths.
But the worst dream is the one where Reglus dies and James is left all alone.
In the morning, Regulus and James scavenge the funeral home for supplies, and are delighted to find the pantry filled with food. There’s canned fruit and vegetables, peanut butter, ramen noodles, instant mashed potatoes, and even more canned food stacked in rows towards the back. It’s almost too good to be true.
Regulus frowns when they stumble upon it, his finger reaching out to swipe at the lid of the peanut butter. “There’s no dust.”
James, who is only half-listening, still lost in the horrors that creep in the back of his mind, just hums in response. Regulus’s eyebrows are furrowed, his expression full of sympathy as he surveys James.
He knows that he’s pathetic, but he can’t seem to stop. Just when everything started to feel sort of normal, he had to find that head. Just as the world seemed to glow brighter again, he got thrown back to the deep end.
“I suppose we could stay here for another day or two. If someone comes back, we’ll slip out the back door and keep going.” Regulus says, and James knows that under normal circumstances he would want to leave now to avoid a confrontation with someone else.
But James is weak and Regulus knows it. James is holding them back but he can’t seem to stop.
He’s a disappointment.
“Alright. One more day.” James agrees, too emotionally unsteady to disagree.
Regulus suggests they start cooking up their food, and James begins the mindless task of divvying up the food and preparing their meals. The longer he does it, the clearer his head becomes. Regulus seems to notice, his own eyes brightening in response.
Once their food is prepared, James and Regulus move to the small kitchen table to eat. As he stares at their food, a wave of gratitude overcomes him. Gratitude for Regulus, who’s kept him alive, and gratitude for the universe, who granted them this food, as well as gratitude for whoever left this food.
“I’m gonna write them a thank you note.” James says, breaking their collective silence.
Regulus glances up, a spoonful of peanut butter halfway to his mouth. “Why?”
“For when they come back.” James says, rooting around his backpack for his forgotten journal. “If they come back. Even if they don’t, I still wanna say thanks.”
Regulus is quiet, his gaze thoughtful as he watches James tear out a piece of paper. “Maybe you don’t need to write that. Maybe we could… stick around here for a bit.”
“Stop runnin’?” James asks.
“Yeah, and if the people come back, maybe we could make it work.” Regulus says, tapping his chin thoughtfully. “Could be crazies, but we’ve been through worse.”
Those words wash over James, his lips spreading into a small grin. “So you do think there are still good people around.”
Regulus doesn’t say anything, his eyes darting back and forth as he shrugs, his head nodding a bit.
“What changed your mind?”
And when Regulus’s eyes meet James’s, it’s as if all the air in the room is gone. “You know.” he says, gaze heavy as he watches James write the thank you note.
James smiles. “No, I don’t.”
Regulus shrugs again, not quite able to meet James’s gaze. “Mhm.”
“Don’t ‘mhm’ me.” James says playfully, smiling for the first time in what feels like days. “What changed your mind?”
Regulus doesn’t verbally respond, but as his heavy gaze meets James’s head-on, he thinks he understands the meaning behind Regulus’s non-answers.
Heart in his stomach, all James can manage is, “Oh.”
Time seems to slow as they stare at each other, neither seeming to want to ruin the moment.
The moment gets ruined anyway. A loud bang on the front door startles them both, and Regulus reflexively grabs his crossbow as he goes to it, opening it slowly. The door gets thrown back as a herd of walkers claw at the doorway, pushing as Regulus tries to throw the door back closed.
“James!” he screams, eyes wide and panicked. “Go.”
“What? No, I’m not leaving you!” James says.
“Go through the back door and run to the street. You’ll avoid them. Just go out there and wait for me, I’ll meet you there.” Regulus says, straining against the walkers fighting to get in.
“I–” James breaks off, devastated and afraid.
“ Go , James.” Regulus grits out.
James does. He grabs his backpack as well as Regulus’s and books it for the back door. He can hear it when Regulus walks away from the door, the growls growing louder and sounds of stabbing emitting around the house.
He runs around the side of the house towards the road, breath coming out in loud puffs. He runs until he can’t breathe anymore, hoping he’s far enough away from the herd, but still close enough for Regulus to catch up to him. He stops, hands resting on his knees as he tries to breathe. He doesn’t notice the car parked a few feet away, assuming it's abandoned like every other vehicle these days. He doesn’t notice anything until rough hands grip him by the shoulder and start pushing him to the parked car.
“Hey, what the–” James protests, twisting and trying to see who grabbed him.
“Shut up or I’ll make you.” The man says, his tone concrete and deadly.
As if things couldn’t get worse. Now he’s being kidnapped by a man wearing… a police uniform?
The man has James’s gun in his hands and the two backpacks are left forgotten in the road. He didn’t seem to spot James’s knife, which grows heavy on his hip as he tries to come up with a plan.
No one is taking him away from Regulus. Not after everything. Not when he’s the only thing that James has left.
As the man shoves James in the backseat of the car, his hand goes for the knife at his hip. Two men sit in the driver and passenger seat, and he knows this is his only chance to get out of this. Without a second thought, barely processing that this is the first human he’s ever killed, he grips the driver’s head and violently slashes the man’s neck, barely blinking before he stabs the passenger’s neck once, twice, then three times before the man slumps forward.
The door to the backseat opens and the man who grabbed James from the road stands there, James’s gun pointed at his chest. He moves without thinking, his foot kicking out and landing in the man’s groin. The man doubles over, the gun slipping from his grip as James reaches out to grab it, flipping it around, and pulling the trigger. The bullet goes straight through the back of his head and he falls with a loud thud.
The air around James grows quiet, and he has no idea what to do now. He sits there for what could be a minute or an hour, snapping out of it when he hears Regulus’s voice.
“James?” he calls out, his tone high and fearful. “James!”
Pulling himself out of the car, he glances down at himself. His hands are covered with blood and he can feel it on his face as well. Regulus spots him almost instantly, his eyes going wide as he sprints to close the distance between them.
And before James can really react, Regulus has his face in his hands and his lips on James’s mouth. The kiss is hard and desperate, tinged with panic and fear. It’s the best kiss of James’s life.
They break apart, foreheads resting against each other, and Regulus surveys the scene. “I thought you were dead, that walkers got you or someone took you, I–” he cuts himself off when his voice cracks, the most emotion that James has ever seen from the younger boy.
“Yeah, some fucker’s tried to nab me off the road. No idea where they were takin’ me.” James says, nodding to the car that’s engine is still running. “Took care of ‘em.”
Regulus spares the car and corpses a brief glance before he pulls James into a bone-crushing hug. “We are never splitting up again.”
“Never wanted to split up in the first place.” James mumbles, forehead falling to rest on Regulus’s shoulder.
“Had to. Didn’t know how else we’d make it.” Regulus whispers, somehow hugging James even tighter.
They stand there for God knows how long, clinging to one another. James finally breaks it by loosening his grip and lifting his head to look at Regulus. “Did you just kiss me?”
Regulus sputters. “I mean–I didn’t–okay, yeah I fuckin’ did. And you kissed me back. So what?”
James laughs, the sound of it exhausted even to his own ears. “Just makin’ sure I didn’t dream it.”
Regulus smiles first, a disbelieving laugh punching out of him seconds later. “If you’re dreamin’, I’m dreamin’.”
“It’s a nice dream.” James admits.
“Yeah.” Regulus whispers back. “It is.”
***
The next day, James is in the driver’s seat of the car that attempted to kidnap him, Regulus in the passenger seat with his crossbow sitting across his lap. They’d found a few CD’s in the glovebox, the stereo turned up and playing Fleetwood Mac as they cruise along the highway.
Regulus reaches across the center console, his hand gently tapping at James’s right hand a couple times until James detaches it from the steering wheel to gently lace his fingers with Regulus’s.
“You think we’ll find ‘em?” Regulus asks, his thumb tracing back and forth across James’s knuckles.
“We will.” James says, his cheeks warm from Regulus’s attention.
In the aftermath of the funeral home, James and Regulus had decided to take the car that nearly stole James so they could try and find the others from the prison. They’ve been driving for hours now, more determined than ever to find their group.
“Hey,” Regulus says, his mouth curled up in a small grin.
“Yeah?” James says, his own mouth mirroring the action.
“What’re we gonna tell Sirius when we find him?”
James’s heart jumps at Regulus’s choice of words. He’s no longer saying if but when they find the others. It’s not wishful thinking. It’s an inevitability.
Shrugging, James’s heart beats a bit faster because of Regulus’s acknowledgement of their relationship. “The truth. What else?”
Regulus is quiet for a moment, and James glances over to make sure he’s still listening, his breath punching out of him when he sees the wide smile on Regulus’s face. His eyes are glittering, dimples on full display, and James is speechless.
”Good. That’s what I hoped you’d say.” Regulus admits, his tone low and joyful.
James guides their joined hands to his mouth as he pressed his lips once, twice, three times to Regulus’s knuckles, keeping their hands in his lap as silence envelopes them again.
They drive, continuing on the fairly empty highway. James allows himself to zone out slightly, eyes stuck to the road and hands drumming to the beat of the music. It’s at least an hour later when Regulus sits up in his seat, murmuring, “Hang on, slow down.”
James does, pressing on the brakes with a frown. “What is it?”
“I thought I…” Regulus trails off, his eyes glued to something outside of his window. “I coulda swore I–”
And then James sees it, too. “No fuckin’ way.”
To their right, just past the treeline of the forest, stands Sirius and Remus, clearly in the midst of an argument as they wildly gesture back and forth. James slams on the brakes, both he and Regulus jumping out of the car in a frenzied rush.
Regulus beats James to getting to the others, and that’s when James realizes that it’s not only Sirius and Remus.
It’s everyone else, too.
“Reggie? James?” Sirius asks, tears springing to his eyes as Regulus barrels forward and flings himself into his brother’s arms. “Oh my God. You’re alive. You guys are alive. ”
James is crying as Remus closes the distance between the two of them, both squeezing hard enough to cut off airways.
“We thought you guys were gone for good.” Remus mutters into James’s ear.
“I knew you guys made it.” James says, looking up and meeting Regulus’s teary eyes from over Remus’s shoulder.
“Of course you did.” Remus chuckles, pulling away to look at James.
The rest of the group gathers around them, everyone crying and hugging. James eventually finds his way back to Regulus, his hand gripping the younger boy’s out of instinct. Regulus squeezes back, tears still shining in his eyes.
“We did it.” Regulus whispers.
“Knew we would.”
Regulus glances up at James, his mouth quirked in the biggest smile that James has ever seen on him. To his immense shock, Regulus leans up to gently press their lips together, more teeth than anything because of their smiles. James sighs into it, his hand coming up to cradle Regulus’s jaw and tilt his head closer. The kiss lingers, going on for much longer than James ever expected. He could keep doing it forever if a voice to their right didn’t start screeching incessantly.
“What the fuck is going on here?” Sirius demands, marching up to them with a gobsmacked question.
James glances down at Regulus, too panicked to say anything. And Regulus? He just laughs. He laughs and laughs until their friends around them are laughing, too.
And James knows that despite everything, they’re home again.