Unbreakable
8 August 1983
Regulus could already feel regret setting in his stomach. He knew what a shock this was going to be to Lupin. A majority of the wizarding world believed he was dead. Only a select few actually knew Regulus Black was alive and even fewer knew he was also raising the the-boy-who-lived. This was how it had to be handled though. This matter was one that had to be built on trust. Otherwise it could not possibly work. Even if the thought of another person being let in on this secret made him uneasy. It wasn’t just about him though or what he wanted alone. The twins needed more than just him. This is for them.
"Regulus."
Lupin's mouth had dropped open when he stepped into the room. He watched as different emotions flashed across his face. Acturus followed close behind him. They had agreed beforehand that Regulus would do all the talking and explaining. Grandfather was just here to make sure the bloke didn't kill him before having a chance to explain all of it.
"Lupin, I know this ma-"
"You're the one raising Harry! I thought it was Arcturus. When he said there was someone waiting for us I figured it was like a lawyer or something to discuss how much I should be allowed access to Harry."
"Yes, Harry and Auro-"
"They named you as guardian? They knew you were alive?" Lupin's eyes went wide as he spoke "Daughter! You, YOU, Regulus Black have a kid?" So that's how this conversation was going to happen; with lots of interruptions. A slight pressure started building behind his eyes. A clear sign of an oncoming migraine. This was going to be painful to talk about.
"Yes. The Potters named me to take over guardianship of Harry. As far as I know Lady Potter did not know. She simply signed the form and trusted James enough to let it happen without the full truth of it all. Her name is Aurora and she is wonderful. She has brought a great deal of joy into my life. A joy I never originally wanted till after I had it. I have very complex feelings about the whole thing.”
"I- but- you faked your death?"
Taking a deep breath he decided to let some of the truth out. There would always be questions about this but it was his choice on how much he shared about that night. About the cave and what happened. This may all come out someday despite what he wants and he wants so badly to keep their bubble from popping. Let it just be their little family for a little longer. Give him more time before the real world comes crashing down on them.
"Yes and no. Technically, I did die. I stopped breathing for a bit due to the events that happened. Luckily, James studied muggle and magical first aid. Managing to bring me back somehow from the veil. I went into hiding not long after since my magical core had also died with me and it needed a bit of time to rest or whatever. It was for my safety that nobody else knew."
Lupin didn’t need to know it actually took a few weeks, staying hidden in a tent in the middle of nowhere in some forest with only one weekly visit from Potter to make sure he was healing and his magic was coming back. The scars on his body would never go away just like the faded outline on his forearm. Painful reminders on the price he paid to ensure the war ended. What he had to do, how deep he had to go.
"James was with you when you died?"
“Yes. There was something that I had to do. A way to bring us closer to ending the war. With his help we made it so the war could end and it did.” Just not in the way they thought it would end. They still lost so many people. It went unsaid but the words could still be felt in the room.
“How long have the two of you been friends? I-how did you help end the war?” Regulus can’t look at Lupin and instead stares out the window. It looks nice outside, a perfect day for flying.
“We have been friends since my first year at hogwarts. We ran into each other one night and the rest was history. Due to my parents and the house rivalry between slytherins and gryffindors we kept it on the down low. We only met up twice a week. It never faltered, not after Sirius ran away and not even after I received the mark. He could have been a hufflepuff with how damn loyal he was. Instead we worked together. When possible I sent him a heads up for raids and worked my ass off to get close enough to kill him.” Regulus stops speaking for a moment and takes a breath, “Instead of killing him I found out a secret. A really dark secret. The kind that would have made ending the war in our favour a lot more difficult. It’s also the kind of treason they most definitely would have killed me and everyone I love over. That's why I have remained hidden, even now. We destroyed it and I signed my fate.”
Remus is quiet for a moment. He is staring down at his hands when he suddenly bursts out laughing.
“Merlin's titts. I picked the wrong time to quit drinking. Okay, so let me get this straight. You and James have had this hidden bromance for years. Behind everyone's backs. You helped find some sort of thing that would make ending the war in our favour near impossible, you died and James managed to bring you back. Only for James, Lily and Peter to die anyway. Leaving Harry with you. Did you know Sirius was the traitor?”
Regulus tightens his hands into fists. The betrayal and anger flares through him. He still doesn’t understand how Sirius could do this. Why would he have done what he did? What had he been offered that made it all worth it? What could the death eaters, or the dark lord offer that would make Sirius turn against them? There was no way it had been an act the whole time. No, they must have had something that would have made such a betrayal possible. Something that was worth all this mess.
“No. I just always assumed that he would die for them. That he would do anything for James because of how they loved each other. I thought all four of you would have died for each other. After everything that happened in school I didn’t think anything would tear you guys apart.” He took another deep breath, “I’m hoping you’ll accept the offer I have here. I want you to be a part of the life we are building and I’m not ready yet to face the wizarding world. There are issues, leftover pains from the war that need working through. I am hoping you’ll accept the position of steward to house Black.”
“You want me to work for you and be a part of Harry's life?” Remus' face contorts into one of disbelief.
The only other person who knew about Aurora was Arcturus and that wasn’t even because Regulus had told him. Remus would have to know. The role of steward was not one to be taken lightly. That was two more people but the war was over. He had no idea why there was a constant nagging feeling that he had to keep this secret still. He just knew he had too and he had a feeling that Remus had to know as well. Even if it scared him.
“I have things I need to share with you Remus. Secrets that I swore I would die to protect. If you want this chance to be a part of this family. I need you to make an unbreakable vow that you will protect my secrets, James secrets.”
“I’ll do it if in return you give me honesty. Whatever I ask you, you give me back the complete truth.”
Regulus only moves from where he sits and falls onto his knees, arm extended. Remus moves to kneel in front of him. Both grabbing at each other's arms. Arcturus steps forwards, his wand out. The magic binds spring out, coming alive with the magical incantation.
“Will you, Remus, vow to protect all of my secrets and not tell another soul without my permission first?”
“I will.”
A bright red rope burst out and wrapped around Remus' wrist.
“Will you, Regulus, vow to always tell me the full and complete truth when I ask for it?”
“I will.”
Another burst of red sprung out and wrapped around Regulus’ wrist. Before Arcturus could end the spell Remus spoke again.
“Regulus, do you also vow to protect any secrets I may also have?”
Regulus doesn’t hesitate in his answer.
“I will. Remus, will you vow to always give me the truth when asked for it?”
“I will.”
Another burst of red sprung out and this time it was done.
…
His heart was beating fast. He should have thought about this more but it was too late to change his mind. The vow was done and now he could have his answers. Slowly they both move back falling on different chairs and Arcturus backs up again. He had been silent this whole time. The head of the Black family, the grandfather to him and Regulus Black. He turns his attention back to Regulus. Regulus. Of all the people to return from the land of the dead he never would have guessed it would be Regulus. Who also happened to be mates with James and is raising Harry.
"Okay, I have something to show you. After that you can ask any questions and I’ll answer them."
Remus watches as the other wizard reaches down into a folder that is sitting on a table beside him. Whatever was in that folder must be important if Regulus made him swear a secrecy oath. Though he did also make him swear one back. It was only fair after all if the other bloke was serious about stewardship. He would have to disclose the werewolf issue and without Arcturus present. That was a secret he kept closed and guarded. Regulus carefully pulls out some documents. First he hands Remus the adoption work for Harry along with the secret will clause allowing for the adoption to take place. Interesting that he could have been a godfather and passed it up for guardianship. They really left that choice up to him. When he flips the paper a letter is behind it.
Oh.
It's James writing. He would know that loopy lazy nonsense anywhere. He spent several years copying notes written in that scribble after a full. Remus can feel his brow furrow as he reads about a daughter that was already in Regulus care. His breath hitched in his throat. It couldn’t be. The little girl in those photos looked nothing like them. Regulus pushes more paperwork into his hands. He looks at them and all these little pieces of some crazy puzzle are starting to make sense. They are slowly stitching themselves together.
Lily was pregnant with twins.
James was friends with Regulus Black.
They kept Harry.
They sent away an unnamed daughter.
Regulus has a daughter.
A daughter that shares the same birthday as Harry.
Regulus was named a secret guardian for Harry.
The paperwork adds more context. It's another adoption form. This time filled out for Aurora, with the blood adoption spot filled out too. He can’t help the sob that breaks out of him. All these fucking secrets. They had been so necessary in the end and it tears him apart knowing that. He really needs that drink now. If Sirius had known the truth. He can’t even think about that or imagine what might have happened. Would he have shown up here and killed his own brother and another innocent child?
Aurora Lilia Jem Black
It's right there in her name. The truth hidden in plain sight. Lilia as in Lily. Jem as in James. With the sobbing comes a laugh, it almost sounds manic to his own ears.
“The blood wards for protection. They are still active because Harry has a blood relative living here with you.”
“Yes.”
“A blood adoption wouldn’t hide that much of her parental heritage.”
“It would not.”
“What exactly did you do?”
“A ritual forgotten to parts of the wizarding world. It is not illegal but is considered taboo by today's society. I looked into it more after I performed it. Using it can be seen as a sign of fertility issues in pureblood society and it’ll definitely hit the headlines when and if it comes out.” Regulus wrinkles his nose at the word headlines, “A blood adoption ritual works on a more permanent level and with the intention of wanting her real parentage hidden. It covered lots of it. She definitely has the Potter hair and her eyes are unique even for the most ancient and most noble house of Black. It can be somewhat undone but she’ll always have Black traits now.”
“Why?”
“You need to be more specific about your question. That’s too broad and I don’t know exactly what you want to know.”
“Why did you do the ritual instead of just an adoption?”
“I only did the adoption originally. After what happened on-that night and what happened to the Longbottoms. I couldn’t take the risk. I just had to do it. I get this feeling sometimes of things that are important and it has never failed me before. Whatever is to come in the following years.. I don’t know how to explain it. I just had to do it for both of their sakes.” It was true or as close as he could get it. No he was not a seer by any means but those feelings. Those moments of just knowing if he went down a certain path it would end in ruin for so many. It was his best course of action to do it. He knew it deep in his magical core.
“You really care for them.” Remus stares at him thoughtfully before he continues speaking, “When did you get both of them?”
“Aurora was just a newborn when James dropped her into my care. She was only a few hours old and she was so tiny I was scared I would hold her too roughly and cause her pain. I saved Harry from the Dursleys on the seventh of November 1981.”
“So, that was you?”
“Grandfather technically got rid of them but I found the bruises the same day I picked up Harry from them. They kept him in a closet. A closet under their staircase. I couldn’t let it go so I sent a letter to Arcturus with everything needed to make a case.”
“The muggles got what they deserved. The Dursleys lost their son, a squib named Dudley, who is in better hands now and being taken excellent care of. The woman is not permitted to be around children of any age and has to attend something called therapy. The man is still in jail. I very much enjoyed emptying out the vault a little to make sure they felt the full force of the Black name.” Arcturus was sitting now.
“They really hurt him in the few days he spent under their care? They hurt him enough to leave bruises? They locked him away, what else? Tell me nothing else was wrong.” Regulus isn’t looking at him again. His face is back at the window and a far away look crosses his face.
“I found the bruises the same day I picked him up. His nappy didn’t fit, like they didn’t even care to make sure he had things in his size. He had a cracked rib. A rib, Lupin. He was just a baby and they cracked one of his ribs. He was slightly malnourished and ate like he was starving. I picked him up on the seventh and he was dropped off with them on the first.” No tears appear to fall but from where he sits Remus can see red in the younger boy's eyes. “Not even a week and that was how they treated him.”
His stomach flips and it twists slightly at the words. He didn’t want to think about it too hard. He would have just left him there because Dumbledore had said it was best. Unaware of the danger his cub was in. Dumbledore would have checked on him and noticed, right? He noticed when Harry disappeared. He looks back down at the papers in hands.
“So Aurora is the heiress of house Black and she is the daughter of house Potter? When do you plan to tell her?”
“She is a secret daughter of house Potter and she is the heiress to house Black. She carries our blood, our family magic and Harry will be the heir to house Potter. As they grow I plan to discuss the war and their family’s part in it. I’m not sure when exactly I’ll tell Aurora. She deserves the truth but I do not want to burden her with the knowledge till she understands that we were at war when she was sent to me. That even once it ends there are still those who would seek to harm us.” Regulus stares directly at Remus when he speaks. “I worry if she is told before she is ready- she could resent us, hate us, anything if we tell her too soon. I don’t want to permanently push her away by not handling this with delicate care. I expect her to struggle with it no matter when she finds out I just don’t want to burden her before she's ready for the full truth. Am I making any sense?”
“Yes. Did you and James ever date?”
He stares at the letters in his hands, reading the words ‘I know you didn't plan on ever having kids. I know. I understand. It's one of those big reasons why things couldn't work out between us.’ over and over again. There was this whole other side of Prongs he did not know and would never get to know.
“Officially? No. It had been a passing thought a few times. We never actually said it out loud. It was only ever a dream because in the end we wanted different things. I could never see myself staying in one place for long or settling down to start a family and James always wanted that full table, country side, full time household with kids and jobs. We wanted different things. Plus there was our parents to think of.”
“Your parents, I understand but Effie and Monty? They never said anything about Sirius and I?” Remus furrows his brow. When him and Sirius had come out to both of them it had been filled with nothing but love and acceptance. Surely, it would have been the same for James.
“Yes, he was their only heir. Just as I am the only Black heir. Sirius ran for the freedom to be himself and it makes it completely different. What James and I carried on our shoulders was old beliefs and status. We had traditions on our shoulders that our parents expected us to follow. It was different and because of that we remained just friends. It would have brought his parents shame if he had chosen a male partner. James was their perfect, golden child, their first son, the only one who could pass on the family magic. While Sirius was their adopted son who needed all the love he could get. They had love to spare and they shared it with Sirius. The Blacks had another son, one that stayed. Who cared if Sirius was bent? Orion let Sirius go because he had me and he was probably too drunk to notice him gone.”
Remus let his eyes drift towards the window. His mind raced with all the information. His heart aches at the thought of his friend not having the support of his parents in such a matter. Did James ever tell them about how he felt for boys or did he keep that to himself? For a moment he entertains the idea that James was just using Lily. Only for a minute before he thinks about the way James would dot on her. The little flowers he would bring home for her, the photos he took of her all the time. That was never fake. From the moment Lily Evans had captured James Potter's eye she had been given a very important part of his love. He was nothing but soft for her. He died trying to protect them and Lily died protecting Harry. He needed to see them before they talked about everything else. Their love was so strong it made two babies, twins.He had to see them now.
“I think I’ve heard enough for now. Can we take a break? If it’s possible, can I see them?”
“Yea, hold on a second.”
Remus watched as Regulus walked up to a door he had not noticed before and the other wizard gestured for him to follow. He slowly walked towards the other room where he could hear Regulus talking on the other side. Stepping through the door and finding toys all over the place. His body stopped walking all on its own when his eyes finally made contact with them. He knew what he was coming into this room for, who he was going to see and it still felt like running into a brick wall at full speed. No amount of time could have prepared him for this moment. Harry is standing beside Regulus. Who is sitting on his knees to talk to the two toddlers in front of him. Three, Harry is three now. No longer a baby, a toddler is in front of him.
Aurora stands just behind Harry. Her eyes look up towards him and for a brief moment they make eye contact. She quickly turns back to Regulus, her little hand grabbing onto his shirt. Regulus turns and gives him an apologetic face. It baffles Remus slightly to see it. The boy from Hogwarts that he knew always had his walls up. He was always ice cold. The little ice king of slytherin is what pad-siri-he would call him. Was this what James saw?
“Sorry. They haven’t exactly been in social situations. They only just meet Arcturus on their birthday and it has only been Harry, Aurora, Kreacher and myself. This is also why I reached out. They need more. What we have is not enough in the long game.” Regulus looks slightly defeated at this admission.
Harry has turned to face him now and his face scrunches up as he stares at Remus. Bright green eyes look all over him. He wants to say something but his voice is currently stuck or missing. It’s locked up and he feels like he is ruining the moment. Harry's mouth suddenly drops open in a gasp before he starts running towards him.
“Mooooooony!”
His knees buckle under him and his arms open wide for the toddler running straight at him. One of the many breaks in his heart aches.