Chapter Seven
Draco was in a good mood the next day and for the following days. Harry kept visiting him every night, sitting on the armchair next to his bed and talking. Draco enjoyed Harry's company. He made Draco laugh, and those feelings of fear, sadness, anguish, and anxiety practically disappeared.
Uncle Sev took him for a walk around the Hogwarts grounds that evening after dinner, saying it would be good for him to get some air. Draco was happy to leave that room, even if just for a short while. They walked along the edge of the Forbidden Forest to the Black Lake, which was completely frozen.
Draco asked if they could skate, but uncle Sev said the ice was too thin because the temperature had risen a bit in the last week, that maybe the ice would be thick enough next week and he could skate a bit.
Draco stared at the frozen lake. He imagined himself skating on the thin ice, going to the middle of the lake, where it was deepest, and the ice breaking, sending him plunging into the freezing water, alone, with no one to save him. The sensation of the ice cold water entering his mouth and nose, travelling down his throat and filling his lungs, until he no longer had the strength to try swimming upwards, sinking to the bottom of the lake, his lifeless body resting there until someone found him — or forever.
The thought of death made Draco smile. Death seemed truly pleasant, even comforting.
It made him wonder whether the window in his room opened. His room was high up, apparently on the top floor of the castle. He could also jump from there, feel the wind hitting his skin until the impact of the cold snow struck his body and darkness consumed him.
That seemed pleasant too.
Uncle Sev took his hand, guiding him back inside the castle when Draco didn’t respond to his calls.
They returned to the room, and Draco changed into his pyjamas again, sitting back on the bed with his back against the pillow propped up against the headboard and the blanket over his legs. Uncle Sev sat in the armchair nearby, watching Draco as he gazed at the snow outside.
He hadn’t been able to play in the snow. All they did was walk around, but Draco had enjoyed that too — getting out of the room for a bit, seeing something different besides his room or the same part of the forest.
— I want you to try a potion. — Uncle Sev said firmly. — It’s new, but it might solve your problem.
Draco looked him in the eyes.
— Will this potion make me better?
— It’s possible.
— If I get better, can I go home?
Uncle Sev remained silent for several long seconds, staring into Draco’s hopeful eyes. He took a deep breath.
— Yes. Yes, you can go home, Draco.
Draco gave him a timid smile, nodding his head.
Uncle Sev handed him a vial containing a thick, dark green liquid. Draco wrinkled his nose before holding his breath and downing it all at once. He had to fight the urge to vomit for a moment before he could breathe again.
Uncle Sev instructed him to sleep, saying he’d return at lunchtime the next day to check the potion’s effects.
Draco lay in bed, staring at the wall in the darkness. He was waiting for Harry to visit him, but he must have fallen asleep before Harry arrived.
The next time Draco opened his eyes, it was still dark. He must have dozed off without meaning to, but Harry must have arrived in the meantime. He felt someone in his bed, on top of him. He looked up, finding brown eyes and blonde hair. It was a boy who looked about sixteen or seventeen years old, smiling down at Draco, his body hovering over him.
— I missed you, Malfoy. — the strange boy whispered, smiling at him.
Draco’s body froze. His wide eyes locked onto the brown irises of the unknown boy. The boy pulled the blankets off Draco’s body and yanked his trousers down, kissing and biting his neck painfully.
Draco’s body wouldn’t respond to his brain. His brain told him to push the boy off, jump out of bed, and run, but his body wouldn’t obey. His brain told him to scream, to call for help, but his voice wouldn’t come out.
— “Not this again…”— Draco thought. — “Not this again… No! Please, no! Stop! I don’t want this again! I don’t like this! I don’t want it!”
He saw the Dark Lord hovering over his body, that creepy smile on his bizarrely pale face, lust in his eyes, and pleasure in his expression from seeing Draco’s fear and despair, from watching him cry.
— The fox always goes after the little bunny. — that terrifying man said with a smile.
— “Not this again! Not this again! Not this again!”— he repeated in his thoughts like a mantra, still unable to speak.
He felt that agonising pain again, the filth once more tainting and permanently staining his body. He felt powerless, helpless, unable to fight back, to stop someone from doing this to him again.
Draco tried to scream again, but only whimpers of pain escaped his throat.
— That’s it, moan for me… Merlin, you’re still so tight!— the boy whispered hoarsely in his ear. — Do you like it? Do you like it when I fuck you like this? Do you?
— “No… No, I don’t like it! I don’t like it! I don’t want this! Not this again!”
Draco felt bile rising in his throat. He thought it was over, that no one else would hurt him. Why was this happening again? He was trying to be good, truly! He hadn’t caused trouble for anyone! He hadn’t insulted others! He was making an effort! Why was this happening!?
The boy was yanked off Draco forcefully and thrown to the floor. Draco sat up quickly, pulling the blanket close to his body, trying to hide not just his nudity but himself. To hide himself from the world.
Draco’s head was pulled up, forcing his gaze away from the blanket and onto the face in front of him. Potter held his face in his hands, speaking to him and calling him by his first name. Draco’s eyes darted between Potter’s two green ones, not really processing what he was saying.
Draco tore his face away from Potter’s hands, pulling his knees to his chest and lowering his head until his forehead touched his knees. He brought his hands to his hair, gripping and pulling it tightly, sobbing loudly.
A piercing scream of anguish tore from his throat suddenly.
Someone needed to kill him.
Someone had to kill him.
Draco couldn’t take it anymore. He wanted death, peace, and the eternal rest it would bring.
His wrists were grabbed firmly, trying to pull his hands away from his hair.
— Draco! Draco, stop it! You’re going to hurt yourself, boy!
The hands pried his fingers from his hair with effort, pulling his hands away from his sore scalp, ripping out a few strands in the process.
His wrists were held firmly against his chest as long arms wrapped around his body, pressing his back against another body. Draco struggled, letting out a desperate scream, trying to break free by any means.
— Draco, it’s Severus! Calm down, my boy! It’s all right, it’s over now!
Draco only stopped struggling after about five minutes of Severus holding him and speaking soothing words.
— It’s all right, my boy. It’s over now; it won’t happen again. — Severus slowly released his godson’s wrists, ready to restrain him again if necessary.
Draco’s torso slumped forward, supported by Severus’s arms as he tried to catch his breath and keep his eyes open. The adrenaline rush had taken too much out of his body, and now he was exhausted.
With effort, he raised his head just enough to see that Connor was no longer there, nor was Potter. The door was open, and he saw McGonagall, Dumbledore, and Pomfrey from the waist down.
They had seen him.
They had seen him like this.
They had seen him crying like a child.
His heart began to race, pounding so hard against his chest that it was physically painful.
— It’s all right, Draco. Calm down, it’s all right now.
Severus continued to speak soothing words and hold him close. Draco’s fragile consciousness, hanging by a thread of energy, snapped under the weight of those comforting words, sending him into the abyss of sleep.
Draco slowly opened his eyes, blinking a few times until they adjusted to the sunlight streaming through his window. Letting out a tired sigh, he turned his back to the window, hugged his pillow, and snuggled deeper into the covers, closing his eyes again trying to go back to sleep. Draco was about to fall asleep again when the sound of the door opening woke him once more. Opening his eyes again, he saw Severus standing beside his bed, watching him warily.
— Is everything all right, Draco? — Severus asked him warily.
Draco blinked a few times, trying to adjust his eyes to the brightness.
— Yes, uncle Sev, everything’s fine. Why?
Severus looked deeply into his eyes, as if searching for something.
— What did you do last night?
— I went to bed and slept. — said obviously.
— And… nothing else happened?
Draco gave him a confused look.
— No, uncle Sev. Did something happen?
Severus blinked away the surprise on his face.
— No. Nothing. Just… — he cleared his throat. — How are you feeling?
— Strangely tired. And my body hurts.. — Draco sat up in bed, groaning at the strange pain in his back.
— The potion can do that.
— Does that mean it’s working? — he asked, hoping that he was finally getting better and could go home.
— Not necessarily. — Severus took his wand from his pocket, casting a few diagnostic spells.
He let out a tired sigh when he was done and looked sadly at Draco.
— I'm sorry, boy. There doesn't seem to have been any change.
Draco lowered his head, his eyes filling with tears.
He just wants to go home. He doesn't want to stay in that cold room anymore, alone, with no one, unable to leave.
Severus sat down next to him on the bed, pulling him into a hug. It was so rare that his godfather would hug him or anyone else that Draco didn't know what to do for a moment, until he snuggled against his godfather's body, letting the tears of sadness and frustration spill from his eyes.
Draco spent the day sleeping, unwilling to face reality. Not even the snow falling outside cheered him up.
The empty feeling in his chest grew with each passing second, and Draco didn't know how to shake off that feeling that was suffocating him. He was exhausted, emotionally drained, without the strength to face the hours that dragged by. It was as if the cold outside had infiltrated him, freezing any will to react. Even the idea of getting out of bed seemed impossible. He just wanted to forget everything, hide under the covers and not deal with whatever was happening around him.
A hand running through his hair in a careful and loving way made him wake up from his sleep little by little. He opened his eyes slowly, blinking the sleep from his eyes and looking up, meeting those beautiful green eyes, making a smile appear on his face.
— You're back! — he said happily.
— Yeah, I'm back… — Harry said sadly.
He looked so sad, a heavy aura around him. Draco's smile slowly disappeared.
— What happened?
Harry looked deep into his eyes.
— Are you okay?
Draco arched his eyebrow.
— I am. Why?
— What? “Why”? For what happened last night!
Harry spoke angrily. But not angry at Draco, angry at someone Draco couldn't tell who it was.
He sat up in bed, his brow furrowed in confusion.
— What happened?
Draco asked, genuinely confused.
Harry remained silent, staring into his eyes, stunned by shock. His mouth opened and closed several times without ever making a sound.
— You... That guy... He... You... You don't remember?
He finally managed to say.
— Remind me of what? What guy? I was the only one here.
Harry looked at him again.
— You... Nothing... Nothing, it was nothing, I just…
Harry looked at the wall, letting out a sigh.
Draco watched the dark-haired boy carefully. He seemed so disoriented, scared and saddened at the same time. Draco didn't like seeing him like this. Shyly, he reached out and took Harry's hand, holding it carefully. The dark-haired boy whipped his head towards him, his eyes wide with surprise. He looked at their joined hands, staring at them in silence for a few seconds before returning the squeeze. Draco smiled at Harry, his pale eyes shining with joy. Harry returned the smile, squeezing the blond's hand tighter. It took away the anguish in Draco's chest, giving way to a genuine and intense joy.
The moment of silent connection between them lasted longer than any words could. Draco felt the warmth of Harry's hand, so real and present, something that anchored him to reality. The touch was comforting, almost like a promise that he wasn't completely alone. Harry seemed to be fighting something inside himself, but for now, the simple fact of being together seemed to be enough.
— It's going to be okay, Draco. — Harry finally said, his voice low and gentle. — I'm here with you, and I'm going to help you get through this. Whatever “it” is.
Draco nodded slowly, his eyes still fixed on Harry’s.
The Phoenix Fire - Harry Potter: https://archiveofourown.org/works/60382195
Ao Amanhecer - Avatar: https://archiveofourown.org/works/47670538