Sevvie and his friends

“I’m sick of listening to the nagging of a mudblood.” Regulus says, intently and looking into Lily’s eyes.

“What did you just call me?” she responds standing up from her seat in the library. All eyes are on them. Severus is stuck in his place. Harry’s face is contorted in anger.

“Are you deaf on top of having dirty blood? How excruciating it must be for you”

Both boys know better than to get between Lily Evans and whatever she’s looking at with those eyes but Harry still takes a fistful of Regulus’s robes.

“Did the inbreeding twisted your brains? Following your delight of a mother example?” he spits, just before Lily can take him out of the way and slap Regulus’s face so hard he falls in a heap of limbs. That does not stop his mouth.

“I beared the brunt of having to talk you for Severus, who at least is a half blood but you mudbloods are nothing but brutes”

Severus has a deathly expression “That’s enough, Black” he is ready to throw punches, while Harry and Lily look at Regulus with contempt. The girl is rapidly taking her things into her bag.

“No wonder your mother despises you, Severus. You must be the spitting image of your muggle father”

He flinches when Severus looks just about to curse him, until Mrs. Pince comes off running and breaking their quarrel.

Sirius laughs.

“You’re kind of trashy, Evans. Must be those parents of you who taught you manners”

Harry does not show the same restraint as with the other brother and gives Sirius a black eye. The irony is not lost on him.

“That was some terrible acting and I don’t know if anyone bought it” Regulus tells them, crestfallen and surrounded by their friends in a warm hug. “I’m so very sorry Lily, I can’t even look you in the eye”

“You’re sorry? I’m sorry baby, I slapped the lights out of you. Are you sure you don’t want to go to the infirmary?” she hovers over him, slapping Harry’s hands out of the way.

“Stop coddling him and coddle me!” Sirius says, with an ice pack over his left eye. “You enjoyed it a little bit too much, Prince”

Harry stops worriedly looking over Regulus and deadpans “You had it coming from a long time ago, Black” 

“Okay” he says, looking at Severus “Maybe I did”

“I’m not stupid” Narcissa declares, finding a time where Lily was not surrounded by her nest mates. She’s a lioness but that matters little.

She’s writing a letter by the lake, feeling the sun in her face, letting the green slades of the grass slide through her fingers. She is in no mood for company. Having all boys for most of her close friends gets old.

Lily cooly assesses the other witch. She has never had a conversation with Narcissa, who is in her sixth year and doesn’t share any classes with her or her friends. She knows Severus and Harry have at least camaraderie with her, but their interactions always occur over their common room or at meals. She doesn’t share those spaces with them, knowing the pureblood girl as a stuck up and nothing else. At least she’s not outright hostile towards her, as her sister.

“I never accused you, Narcissa.”

“Leave Reggie out of anything your little group is planning. I’m not losing Reggie”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about-” she is stopped by a wand to the face.

“I don’t like repeating myself”

“Not all of us can stay put and let things happen, Narcissa. Some of us really have things to lose in what’s to come”

“And what is to come, Lily Evans?”

“War.”

Narcissa looks at her, stricken, seemingly as if seeing the implications of what they’re talking about. Lily wonders if there have been Seers among the Blacks. She’s afraid of finding out.

“You love your family. And so do I.”

“That, I do.” she says and lowers her wand. “We could have been friends, Lily Evans”

She doesn’t think so. Her blood impeded it. But she still says “Maybe after all is over, we still can”

She feels even more tired than she felt before, as she sees Narcissa walk towards the castle. She does not want to talk about war or see a single fucking man. Seeing Narcissa reminded her for a minute about Lucius and that reminded her about what she had to do with his blood. She sighs. She will take a long bath in the prefect bathrooms. She deserves one. With bubbles. 

“The lightning striking us is a must?”

“Afraid so”

“Bummer”

With how little actual time consuming the animagus transformation takes (most of the work is in learning to speak and eat with a mandrake leaf under their tongues and then, saying the spell every day) they start working on their Occlumency shields. The Blacks already have a shoe in, from their upbringing and their return home over the summer, and Harry, who since his waking up, had to train himself to compartmentalize and meditate (he feels like two people at the same time sometimes, he is too young and too old at the same time, at times confused between what is it and what it could have been and what it never will be, sometimes looks at the bushy hair of his mo- friend and he’s reminded of another girl, another friend. Sometimes he looks at a chess board and freckles come to mind) and he also has had so much time without supervision that he has read everything he could about the mind arts. He is not so good with Legilimency, his intrusion clumsy and damaging, but Severus takes to it as lighter to gasoline. There’s setbacks, of course. 

“STOP THINKING THOSE THOUGHTS ABOUT PETUNIA” Severus yells and covers his eyes

“Aw a growing boy can’t help what a growing boy thinks, Snivy”

“I’m going to kill you dead” Lily says, and something in her eyes freezes Sirius. Sometimes he thinks Lily Evans and Walburga Black would be dangerous allies. If his mother wasn’t a prejudiced arsehole. He’s happy that won’t happen soon.

Harry barely trusts James and Sirius. The things they know are just because they walked on them, but the secrets he shared with his nestmates are still only between them. They had told Remus little, although he was not so closed off to it compared to the fourth marauder.  They had told nothing to Peter. Harry made James and Sirius swear on it. 

“I thought I was your favorite marauder” Remus tells Severus. The other boy sputters and his face gets a lovely shade of red. 

“Stop that. Have manners” he deapans. 

Severus is sharing a bag of goodies his mum sent with the wolf and the girl, because, much to his own chagrin, he likes them.  He doesn’t know if he likes them as he thinks the others like him. And he kicks himself over it because there’s so much to do and so much to worry about to be thinking about Remus and his maybe relationship with Dorcas and how the two of them pay attention to him. 

Dorcas is, of course, at his side too, sandwiching between Remus and her. She shares a hidden look with Remus, squeezing their linked hands behind Severus. They know not to press. She yells out to Lily about her Charms essay and there’s that.

“You should…” James tells him “You should meet my family”

Lily raises her head.

“What” Harry says, looking like a deer in the headlights.

“You and I know it even if we don’t speak of it. You’re a Potter”

“I’m a Prince” he says intently, looking at Severus who has narrowed eyes.

“In name you are, but in looks…” he sighs and passes a hand through the wild strands of the same head full of head Harry has. “I don’t know who your parents were and I know that you have been formally and magically adopted by Severus’s mum. But you should know that you also have family with the Potters.

“I-”

“Just think about it, okay? We could meet over the summer. I have grandparents that want to know about you. Just think about it and don’t be a wise ass.”

Harry thinks about it. James is his…friend. Nothing else. But he has a chance he never thought about. He could see more about where he could have been from. He has the chance to meet James’s parents and grandparents, even. Ghosts of the future that will never be dance in his eyes, just out of reach. He has a family now, but…he could have even more.

“I would like that” he whispers.

“Maybe you can get them to give you money–Ow, I was just saying!”

There’s no time. They are running out of time.

The marauders formally join the Order. Harry is not well. He tells Severus and Regulus he needs some time alone and goes to the Chamber, to see Merlina. She’s the only company he can accept right now. 

They are all children and they have no time left.

Their fifth year ends with a final feeling. He thinks he remembers a time where all his friends were child soldiers and he died. He doesn’t know if that’s the past or the future. All he knows is that the familiar feeling he has is not welcome.

Summer is just around the corner.

Remus is worried. He is the worrier of the group, always has been. Two of his best friends are keeping some secrets and although he is not worried (he has his own not so hidden secret with one particular Slytherin) he sees it eat at Peter. Peter, who is always in need of reassurance, who seems so nervous but is always there with them, who underwent being struck by lightning, just to keep his secret and run with him. He reassures him the best he can, and when Dumbledore gathers them and tells them to rise to the occasion, Peter is there with him too, nervously looking up at him. He squeezes his hand and Peter smiles. James puts a hand on Peter’s shoulder and Sirius claps his back and suddenly, the four of them are together once more, ready for the fight that is to come.

He’s tired and Dorcas stops kissing him to glare at him when his stomach growls. 

“Did you eat already?”

He groans and tries to kiss her again. She swats him in the head.

“I’m not hungry, I’m just tired.”

“And restless. Which is not a good combination. Today is the full moon, Moony. You have to eat.”

“I know, love” he responds.

He has been thinking about the order, about Dorcas, about Severus and the fact that they haven’t told him about their relationship, the relationship they want with him (what if he doesn’t like them? What if he only likes one of them?) and he has been on the fence about telling him he’s a werewolf. He doesn’t want to scare him away, and Severus, for all he’s ruthless and often aloof, has the fragilest charming heart he has ever seen. He is, for what he’s seen, slow to let anyone close to his heart, but once someone breaks through, he holds them dear. He would bleed, die for his friends. Remus wants so bad to be one of the people Severus cares about. He doesn’t know if the little moments they share with him are enough to be considered as dear to him.

“You’re thinking about Sev, are you?”

“You always know what’s in my mind”

“Stop sucking up, wolf, it will get you places” Dorcas says and kisses him sweetly. “We have to talk to him, make our intentions clear. But I think that if the two of us talk to him at the same time he will short circuit. Slow but direct. That needs to be our way”

Remus agrees. He thinks Severus might run if they corner him. 

Pain shoots in his joints and he groans, puts his head on Dorcas’s shoulder and sighs.

“Today it’s going to be a bad one”

And that night is, of course, when everything goes to shite. 

He remember glimpses of it, of going to the shack and turning against himself, of running free calling to Mother Moon, of running wild and chasing after a dog, a deer and a rat. And then there’s prey.

Whyareyouherenonononowh-

There’s prey and he’s running, smelling the ocre scent of fear. There’s prey with silky, black hair and aquiline nose and there’s a girl with bright fire red hair and he stalks because the wolf doesn’t understand about love, doesn’t differentiate between friend and prey. Then he smells something delicious and the wolf screams mate. And he runs after the delicious smell, wanting to bathe in it.

A bright light emerges and a bird of prey nicks at him and that’s the last thing he remembers.

He wakes up naked, alone and with blood under his nails and fears the worst. He clothes himself, gets quickly out of the passage, avoids getting hit by the Whomping Willow  and runs to the castle, caring little about his bare feet or the fresh cuts that are slowly healing in his face and arms. He doesn’t stop for the his and hellows from his housemates along the way. He needs to find his friends.

James is the first one he finds and he takes his lapels tight.

“Easy tiger” he says, upon being cornered by his friend, and with an easy smile that not completely puts Remus at ease because James can be one twisted motherfucker.

“What happened?” he asks, shaking his friend.

“Okay. Sev showed up, the fool forgot it was the fool moon and went-”

“Forgot?” he says, and all air leaves him at once. The pit in his stomach grows deeper. That, and a overwhelming sense of betrayal “You told him?” he growls and shakes James harder.

James widens his eyes at him “No! I promise Moony, I would never tell. They know. They already knew. I told no one”

That only changes the betrayal for a mix of confusion, fear and anxiety.

“Go to the dorm”

“What?”

“I’m telling you to go to your bed, Moony. You’ve had a long night”

“I need to find Severus-”

“Go. to, your. bed”  he says, looking to his eyes with mirth. Remus wants to sucker punch him.

“Do it. You’ll thank me later”

They are sleeping. 

On his bed.

He opens the curtains and is greeted by a vision of silky hair and curls entangled on his bed.

Severus opens his eyes.

“C’mhere” he whispers and yawns.

Remus wants to kiss him. But he wants answers first.

“Did I hurt you? Are you okay?”

Dorcas groans and extends her arms in the air.

“Come to us, wolf. Smells our scents, we are okay”

He does. The overwhelming scent of mates and home and the perfume of their sleepy bodies settles something in him that felt like an incomplete puzzle before.

He lies with them in his tiny bed, embracing Severus and Dorcas in a protective hold.

He still needs answers, still needs to make sure he didn’t hurt anyone, but at the moment, he is tired and his mates are safe. Anything else can wait until later.

When they wake up, Remus is silent. Waiting for Severus to speak. He caresses the boy’s cheek, now happy in the knowledge that he is allowed.

“Let’s set something straight.” he starts, still looking shyly between them “I’ve know you were a werewolf for months now”

“How?” Dorcas aks.

“How everyone doesn’t know is the correct question” Severus sighs “You disappear on every full moon when the sun sets and at the next day you’re always tired. And you’re also,” he pauses and his cheeks redden, but his expression is the same serious one “You’re incredibly strong. How no one figures is the real mystery. But also, and you can’t tell anyone about this, is not a secret per se but it would be a pain for everyone to know, Harry is a parseltongue. And the snakes in the castle have a lot to say. That’s how we confirmed you were a werewolf, and how we know your three insufferable friends are animagi.
Remus wants to ask lots of questions, wants to know whether Severus wasn’t afraid of him, what exactly happened yesterday and how many other things the Slytherin does and he’s about to do it, but instead a shaky

“Can I kiss you?” comes out of his mouth and he’s mortified before the words leave his mouth.

“I’m sorry, I meant-” he is interrupted by cool hands surrounding his cheeks and a sweet press of lips that remind him of the smell of pine trees and just cut grass. 

“I don’t…” Severus starts, and his scent sours “I don’t like sex. I like kisses and like intimacy and could try having sex with you because you are you but I have a very low drive and-”

Dorcas laughs and gives a peck to Severus “Such a boy, with the mind right on the gutter”

She shares a look with Remus. “If you ever want to try with one or another or with both, that’s okay. That’s a conversation we’ll have later on. But if you don’t, kisses, hugs, just holding hands once in a while, that’s okay by us. Rights Remus?”

He thinks about this moment, about getting to just sleep or nap with these wonderful people with him have him respond bashfully “Right”

“You have to tell us all about it”

“I have not” says Severus, to the indignant sounds of Lily. They are hanging out in the Room of requirement.

“You bagged not one, but two gorgeous people and you don’t want to share details about it?” asks Harry. “And just after the wolf tried to eat you? Mean, brother”

“I have always been mean”

Regulus laugh alongside with them, but says nothing. His smile fades.

In the train back home the atmosphere is tense. Regulus sits with his cousins given that he no longer spends his free time with the group in public. Lily mourns it, as well as Severus and Harry. Harry misses the quiet company of Regulus the most.

“I can’t wait for this mess to be over.”

Eileen receives her two boys with open arms but there’s lines of worry in her face. The whole atmosphere in the stations is sombre, with families aligned with the dark and with the light in the same space. They are positively surprised no one throws a curse.

That summer they spend dueling with each other in Eileen’s. Their home is a magical house and any magic registered is hidden by the wards they have. Harry and Severus go at each other viciously and that preoccupied Eileen, but she says nothing.

Sixth year comes, and they learn to Dissaparate. They are still not talking to Regulus or Sirius where anyone can see, they only talk after hours in the Room or the Chamber. It a thought year, with declared death eaters and secret order members. Quarrels often result in duels. The year is thought on everyone. And then, summer comes to, with and urgent feeling that everything is about to boil over.

Harry grieves the letters he used to be able to send to Regulus, now that he decided to be the agent inside. His brother is doing the same, but they certainly don’t miss trying to owl him.

He’s talking to Petunia, who is the closest to an older sister he has when Sirius apparates and tells him the very worst words he could have expected.

“Regulus is not home. The dark lord came to our house, asked him to lend him Kreacher and when the poor bastard returned, Regulus left with him. He didn’t tell me where, but told me to tell you”

Past, present and future collide in Harry’s mind he starts heaving.

It’s too soon, it’s years too soon

He is about to apparate to a place he maybe remembers or maybe imagines when Lily appears in front of him and guides him to breath.

“We- need to go to Reggie, We’re going to lose him, I can’t lose him.”

Severus tries to help him breathe and goes deathly pale at his words.

“Do you know where he is?” Lily asks.

“You’re not going anywhere without me. He’s my little brother”

“For Merlin’s sake, let’s go all of us”

“If Lily is going, I’m going”

Harry takes a deep breath and pictures the cliff on his mind. It’s dangerous to apparate with his mind in tumult  and with so many people at once, but he closes his eyes and feels his body liquify to travel through a straw.

A world of pain is what awaits him. He calculated correctly, but the cliff is narrow, so Petunia apparates just on the border and almost trips. Sirius takes a hold of her while Severus and Lily are trying to stand up.

Harry lands sitting, so he impacts his tailbone. A missing stripe of his arm has him breathing hard, but he charges.

“Petunia” he says, with serious voice “Stay here”

“I’m not going to-!”

“Please Tuney” Lily begs “We don’t know what we’re going to find and we may need our wands. Please stay”

The water is freezing cold when they finds the passage and at the face of the monolithic entrance. Harry loses no time on squeezing his oozing arm to get a handful of blood and offer it. 

“Give me a little” Lily says “In case I need it”

The darkest than dark cave awaits them, with a dense silence which seems almost solid. The air is stale and the atmosphere is heavy. They can’t even hear their breaths although the sound should echo on the place. It seems worse than what Harry remembers.

“Regulus!” he yells and hears nothing back. 

“Don’t touch the water. Is full of Inferis. They fear fire, so get your wands ready. Sirius, come with me”

The boat is returning still, and he and Sirius, who just recently reached 17, hop on

“Your boggart. You knew this would happen. And if I lose my brother, Prince, I’m going to kill you”

“I kill myself I we loose Reggie.”

ThiscannothappenagainI’mgoingtolosehimIcan’tlosehimIlovehimIdon’tdeservetolovehim

A splash echoes around the cave and before they can’t stop him, Harry launches himself in the inferi infested lake.

From there is a battle of splashes and Severus casts a Lumos Solem to evade the inferi, that, with the water being disturbed, are nicking at  their toes and trying to drag them down. 

Sirius, being a Gryffindor, but overall a, older brother, enters the lake too. Fighting off the inferi that try to drown him.

All of a sudden, a silver wolf emerges from the lake, fighting off inferi that cover from their light and the wolf drags off three wizards that reach the boat.

“I didn’t know the Patroni could do that”

“His can, apparently” deadpans Severus.

Reggie is still closed eyed and not breathing when they reach the shore.

“Oh my god, get out of my way” says Lily, impatiently and starts doing cpr on Regulus.

Tense minutes pass before he coughs out the water and Severus is one handedly fighting off the inferi.

“Let’s get outta here”

They reach Petunia, who is waiting with a worried look and she hugs Lily, when she sees her.

“Don’t ever leave me behind Lils”

“I promise”

They have to apparate in two groups, with Sirius and Severus guiding the apparition.

When they get back to Surrey, Petunia waves them all off but Regulus and runs him to her house to try to warm him off. He cries and clings to her in the middle of his sobs.

“You knew this would happen” Sirius bites and throws himself to Harry

“What is happening here!?” yells Dahlia Evans, in the middle of the yellings.

“Stop that Sirius, this is not Harry’s fault. I went willingly and without telling you”

That doesn’t stop his brother from returning the black eye to Harry.

They are all bundled together by the fire, Reggie still being hugged closely by Petunia when they hear the pop of apparition.

Kreacher takes a look at them, then at Reggie and starts crying.

“Master Regulus, oh master Regulus” he sobs and throws himself at his feet “Kreacher did what master Regulus said but he was a bad elf, a bad elf. Kreacher told the heir”

“You did well” is all he can muster to say.

He cries himself hoarse for a while more before he sniffs and tells them “Mistress Walburga is calling for the heirs”

“Good” says Harry “I have things to tell that woman”

Petunia looks into his eyes and tell him “I’m coming too. I have words for that woman too”

Still wet and without saying goodbye to Lily’s and Petunia’s mother, the six of them apparate to Number 12 Grimmauld place. 

They all expect the screaming and yelling about mudbloods and blood traitors from Walburga. What they don’t expect is Harry grabbing Walburga by the hair, surrounding her by snakes he calls and  and dragging her to see pale and trembling Regulus.

“This is the farsant you follow did to your precious heirs. Today they almost died. He almost killed them”

Petunia, still holding Regulus says “Even a bitch doesn’t abandon her puppies”

“HOW DARE YOU?! Lies. It cannot be, the dark lord-”

Regulus lets go of Petunia and stands up to be eye to eye to his mother “The dark lord is a liar. He’s not even a pureblood”

“And we’re going to kill him” Severus adds.

“He did this to you two?” she asks, abating her rage.

“Yes”

“We have three horcruxes. The dark lord will fail”

Walburga centers all her hate in a single gaze. “Good.”

“Everybody knows I’m the weakest link. I couldn’t even be with you publicly. When the dark lord asked me for Kreacher, I had to say yes. But when he returned and told me of everything… I was dumb. I was hot headed. I thought I could bring you a horcrux and avenge Kreacher, all in one, and you would see I deserve to be in the group”

“You are stupid” Harry growls, and Regulus shrinks. Petunia gives him the stink eye from the other bed.

“You are not the weakest link, you are part of us. You know” he shuddered and hugged Regulus closer “one of my deepest fears is to lose you, Reggie. You know that. Please don’t take years of my life like that again”

They are all sharing a room, too frazzled to be separated now. Sirius is with Harry and Regulus because he was not letting any funny business take place, Severus has his own cot and the sisters are sharing, because Lily was not going to let Sirius offer Petunia and him share. 

“Then, why haven’t you told me about the last horcrux? You didn’t trust me because I was going to be the closest to the dark lord”

“It’s not that”

Severus sits in his bed “He hasn’t told any of us, not just you.”

The room is in silence, and Harry has a complicated look. He hides his face in Regulus’s side.

“What” says Sirius, jokingly “Is it something of a sacrificial thing? You’re the last horcrux or something?”

Harry suspiciously silent’

“Are you shitting me?!” Lily yells

“Are you serious” Severus yells

“I’m Sirius” Sirius yells

“Shut up!” Petunia yells “Bloody hell, we didn’t tell our parents we were staying over”

“You are really not related to the Slytherin line, are you?” Regulus doesn’t yell.

“I’m not”

Harry tells them everything. Except for who his parents are.

“Dumbledore did what?!”

Everyone is finally asleep. Except for Regulus and Harry. They whisper in the night, sharing one breath.

“Is this why you told me to wait? Because you think you are a sacrificial lamb?”

“I’m a dead man walking, Reg, I couldn’t do that to you”

“You are one stupid man, Harry Prince” he says, and kisses him sweetly “Together we’ll find the way to kill Voldemort without you having to die”

Harry feels stinging on his eyes. Maybe he waited all his past and present life to hear those words .

“Okay”