Chapter 1
Harry doesn’t last long beyond supper.
Food heavy in his belly and feeling warm, Harry barely makes it to the couch before he passes out. His sleep is entirely dreamless and so deep that when he wakes up, it takes too long to realize that he’s in a bed. He blinks his eyes open, confused-
Harry jolts up and flails out of the bed, his hands and knees slamming into the floor with a thud. He scrambles for the door, his chest so tight that he can’t even breatheand the walls close in on him. He rips the door open, nearly slamming it into the wall as he lunges out of the room. He stumbles through the short hall and collapses to the floor next to the table, clutching his chest as he tries to remember how to breathe. A short, wheezy gasp stings his throat as he finally figures it out.
“Harry?”
Harry flinches, his sweaty hands slipping on the floor as he tries to whip around. He shoulder checks the chair next to him, causing an abrupt clatter. Lucille utters a small sound of regret, standing just inside the hall and dressed in a robe. Harry inhales sharply and relaxes a little, feeling ridiculous for his reaction.
“Lucille,” Harry rasps, shakily pushing himself to his feet. He feels left-footed, bereft and strangely out of place in this homey space. The ceiling and walls almost seem to shift towards him, reaching for him-
“Are you okay, honey?” Lucille carefully approaches Harry, her voice gentle and comforting.
The endearment slides into his chest and eases the tightness there. Breathing becomes easier, the wheeze disappearing as his lungs open back up. Harry clears his throat as he nods, avoiding her eyes as he replies, “I’m fine, just... it was just a bad dream.”
Harry had thought he was in the White Room, despite waking up in a bed but he’s not going to admit that to her. Not right now. Not for a while, if he has anything to say about it.
Lucille slowly reaches out and gently grasps his upper arm, squeezing a little in comfort, “Are you in pain? It sounded like it hurt.”
Harry doesn’t feel any pain. His magic must have kicked in on its own to sooth it away. No, he just feels wrung out and exhausted now. Harry shakes his head, his hand coming up to cup Lucille’s elbow in return, “If it did, it doesn’t now. I’m fine, Lucille. You should go back to bed.”
Lucille just smiles sadly, “You and I both know you’re not fine, Harry.”
Harry can’t help the minute flinch at her perceptiveness, his hand falling away. No, he isn’t okay but it’s not something he wants to burden them with. It’s still too fresh, too-too-
Vivid.
“But,” Lucille squeezes his arm gently again and then lets him go. She smiles at him, kind and understanding as she continues, “I won’t push, okay? I just want you to know that I’ll be here for you, whenever you’re ready to talk.”
Harry can’t seem to speak through the thick lump in his throat. He shakily nods instead, attempting a smile for her but probably failing at it. Her smile saddens a little as she opens her arms, silently offering. Harry is stepping into the hug before he can think about it, burying his face in her shoulder and winding his skinny arms around her. She even smells comforting. Harry squeezes his eyes shut against sudden urge to cry, breathing carefully as she sways them gently back and forth.
When they finally part, Harry is no longer shaking. He’s calmer and the walls no longer seem like they’re trying to lean in. Lucille smiles at him, looking far less worried, “Get some more sleep, okay?”
Harry quirks a far more genuine smile, “You too. Goodnight.”
“Goodnight,” Lucille whispers, turning around to pad back into the room she shares with Negan. Harry stays there until he hears the quiet click of the door closing and then heads into the bathroom to relieve himself. He ignores how the walls try to lean in again, leaving the door open as he goes. Once done, he turns to the couches in the den. It’s a bit chilly in the room but he doesn’t care, laying down and tucking himself into the back of the couch. It’s a bit smelly but bearable, keeping Harry here instead of there. It’s enough to allow him to fall back asleep.
---
“Harry?”
Zoey’s voice drags Harry out of the deep dark. He opens his eye, the other pressed into something fluffy and comfortable. His little sister hazily drifts into focus, looking a bit concerned. Harry blinks and raises his head, finding a thick blanket wrapped around him, a corner being used as a pillow. It’s incredibly difficult to think, his brain feeling like cotton balls. “Hm?” Harry grunts, pushing himself up to sit. He feels shaky and exhausted still.
Zoey leans back a little, brightening a bit, “Oh good-”
“Zoey!” Lucille’s disappointed voice makes Zoey cringe. Lucille is standing just outside of the short hall, disappointed frown in place and her arms crossed. Harry rubs his eyes, trying to wake up properly as Lucille scolds Zoey, “I told you to let him sleep! He would’ve woken up on his own!”
“But-!” Zoey tries to defend herself, already gesturing to Harry as she mounts an argument.
“I don’t want to hear it, young lady,” Lucille cuts her off firmly. “Doctor Carson said to let him sleep and feed him when he wakes. There was no need to wake him up. Go get the supper dishes done, please.”
Harry blinks groggily at Zoey as she huffs and does as told, giving him a relieved look, “Fine. He might as well eat, then.”
“I’m... right here?” Harry grunts out, pushing the blanket away fully. He still can’t think clearly but at least he doesn’t feel like he’s going to fall over.
“Hey, you,” Lucille addresses Harry as she approaches. Her cool hand lands on Harry’s forehead before he can react and he leans into the touch with a bit of relief. He didn’t know how warm he was until now. “Oh, you feel warm. Think you can eat something?”
His stomach gurgles weakly, acute pain flaring up. Harry knows that pain very well but he’s not sure if he can stay awake. Already his eyelids feel heavy and his eyes dry. The siren of the couch calls to him, the blanket beckoning him down into its warmth.
“I’ll grab your supper. Just hold on, okay?” Lucille says, leaving him there. Harry watches her go and rubs his eyes again, trying in vain to stay awake. Lucille takes something out of the fridge that’s covered by another plate. She sets the cover plate aside and merely grabs a fork, returning to Harry, “Here. Eat as much as you can, okay?”
Harry takes the plate and fork blankly, leaning the dish against his chest to keep it steady. It takes a moment to work the fork but he gets it on the second fumble, scooping the pasta into his mouth. The sauce is thin but good, the noodles tasting like heaven. It’s so far removed from the bland meals of the Commune that Harry digs in heartily, feeling more awake and human with every bite. Halfway through, though, he begins to wilt again, his filling stomach transforming into bone deep tiredness. He manages a few more bites, his eyes drooping tiredly and starts when the plate is suddenly lifted from his lax grip.
“Whoops, I got it,” Lucille tuts comfortingly, saving the couch from a foodvalanche as the plate nearly tips over. She hands him a cup of water and a damp face cloth, “Here, drink some water and wipe your face. Then you can go back to sleep.”
Harry sleepily drinks the water. Lucille takes the cup as soon as he finishes. Then he wipes his face halfheartedly, already folding back into the couch as Lucille plucks the cloth away. Harry drifts off almost instantly.
---
Harry inhales sharply and blinks awake at the sensation of fingers in his hair. Sirius’ smile is the first thing Harry sees and it’s enough to assure him that he’s safe. He rubs his eyes groggily, faintly annoyed at being woken up again.
“Sorry, Pup,” Sirius coos quietly, his soft smile widening into a mischievous grin. “You need to get up for a bit. You need to eat something hot and delicious and take a shower, you stink.”
Harry groans and rasps out, “Rude.”
Sirius chuckles, half standing to help Harry sit up, “Come on, breakfast is being made. You should take the shower first, it’ll wake you up.”
“Harry’s up?” Lucille asks from the kitchen. “You didn’t wake him, did you?”
Sirius looks up, affronted, “I would never!”
“Mhm,” comes the completely unconvinced hum. “You can sleep after you eat, Harry,” Lucille assures, pointedly ignoring Sirius. “You need food and water first. Up you get.”
Harry unhappily stumbles to his feet, feeling incredibly stiff and sore. It seems they’re onto something with getting him up. He needs the bathroom something bad again, too. “Alright,” Harry replies agreeably, stretching to ease some of the stiffness while his magic kicks in to sooth the soreness. “Clothes?”
“I’ll make sure they’re on the counter in the bathroom,” Sirius answers helpfully as he lightly shoves Harry towards the hall.
“Take your time, honey,” Lucille assures Harry as she continues to cook something that smells amazing. “Zoey took one last night.”
Harry nods with a hum, slowly padding into the bathroom. He tries to shut the door but the walls suddenly lean in, so he leaves it open as far as he dares. He’ll change in the shower if he has to, at least the curtain is colourful enough to keep him centred. The shower is quick; Harry doesn’t linger, perfunctorily washing himself. When he peeks out from behind the curtain, the clothes Sirius promised – underwear, shorts, t-shirt - is sitting on the toilet within reach.
Thankfully, the door is still wide open. Harry dries and dresses in a rush, huddling in the shower until he’s decent. He didn’t want to risk someone walking in by accident. When he steps out, the bathroom seems... longer and narrower than he remembers. He ducks his head and tries not to run out, his shoulders almost up to his ears in discomfort. The moment he’s out of the bathroom, everything seems to shift back into place and he relaxes.
This is getting a bit ridiculous, Harry thinks to himself as he heads to the table. It bothers him that something as simple and natural as a shower has become this mental battle he needs to fight. Sirius is already eating, reading from a book with no visible cover.
Lucille is plating up scrambled eggs with toast. She glances at him and beams in welcome, “Good, just in time. Sit, would you like tea or water?”
Harry answers eagerly, “Tea, please. Thank you.” He hasn’t had tea in ages. Just the thought of having a cuppa for breakfast ignites his appetite with a painful gurgle.
Lucille nods, setting a plate down in front of Harry that’s piled with eggs and toast. It looks... overwhelming. He doesn’t know if he can even finish this. Lucille seems to pick up on his dubious feelings because she smiles, “As much as you can, no pressure.”
“Thanks,” Harry manages a smile for Lucille, who perks up and glows as she turns away to grab the requested tea, setting it down on the table within reach. Harry immediately grabs it to take a sip; it’s not as hot as he’d hoped and the taste seems... off but it’s entirely palatable. He takes a bigger gulp, feeling it settle the hunger pains for the moment.
“Not quite the taste of home but close enough, hm?” Sirius murmurs to Harry with a quick wink.
Harry nods as he sets the cup aside, flashing a quick, conspiratorial grin at his Godfather before digging into his pile of eggs. They’re a bit heavy on the salt and pepper, though the toast spreads the spice more evenly. Sirius peeks at him a couple of times, the corners of his eyes crinkling when he smiles.
Unfortunately, as good as the eggs turned out to be, Harry fills far too quickly.
“Morning,” Zoey mumbles, the bathroom door shutting immediately after.
Harry eyes the eggs left and puts down his fork, unable to eat any more. That exhaustion he woke up with comes back with a vengeance, encouraged by a full stomach and the small taste of home.
“Can’t fit another bite?” Sirius asks, his tone lacking any amusement. Harry shakes his head, beginning to droop right there at the table.
“Oh dear, looks like he needs some more sleep,” Lucille tuts, fond and concerned. “Can you-”
Sirius stands before Lucille can even finish her request, “Sure can, Lulu-pie. Come on, Pup, let’s get you back on the couch.”
Harry’s upper arm is gently grasped and he’s helped to his feet, his mind growing very fuzzy and thick, “That sounds nice,” he mumbles as he leans into Sirius’ warmth.
“Can you put him in-” Lucille goes to request but Sirius accidentally cuts her off, “Just a bit further, Pup. There you go.”
Harry sinks into the couch with a grateful sigh, drifting off before the blankets are even drawn over him.
---
Harry blearily blinks his eyes open. Sirius is sitting on the floor, body facing the wall but attention on the television. His thumb is rubbing Harry’s wrist gently, subconsciously, as he watches some movie. Harry blinks again, his lids feeling too heavy to keep open.
Sirius is here. He can sleep some more.
---
Harry wakes to a still house, feeling utterly refreshed.
Stretching lazily, Harry scratches his head as he tries to get his brain working. Once a few brain cells stutter back to life, so does the Sense he’s recently gained. Flames light up in his mind, first two in the room closest to him – burning bright, solid and steady without a flicker of doubt – then the single Flame across the way – which does flicker, minutely. Before he can concentrate on them, more appear – under him. Unlike the first three, the ones that fade into his Sense flicker rapidly and vary in size and brightness. There is a single, solid and bright Flame that outshines even the two next to Harry but the rest? There are some two dozen souls he can Sense that walk a fine line between wanting to live and giving up.
Sanctuary looked so happy and stable on the way up...
Harry closes his eyes, his brow furrowing. He doesn’t remember taking in anything like this on the way up. In fact, all he can remember is how they looked – happy, content, safe – but he doesn’t remember... well, he had been pretty distracted with being reunited with them and then overwhelmed by just how much they accomplished while he was away. Maybe his Sense only works when he’s able to concentrate on it. He certainly didn’t Sense anything the few times he woke up to eat and relieve himself. Didn’t even think to, in fact. He’d just been so exhausted.
Why did he sleep so long, though? Harry only remembers waking up those few times – how far apart were they? How long did Harry actually sleep? The only healing he did was for Zoey’s finger and that was hardly straining, so why did his body shut down like that?
One of the brighter Flames below shifts and starts moving around. It makes the smaller Flame next to it dim quite a bit. The third Flame in the same space flickers on, unbothered by what took place. Some other Flames bundled together in the same space also shift but none move about. Harry is acutely aware of every movement and though its useful out in the wilderness, Harry doesn’t want to be sensing however many people live here every second of every day. It’s already getting on his nerves how the one Flame keeps moving about their space restlessly and the dim, flickering Flame next to it sets him on edge. He feels like he’s invading their privacy, in a way because he’d certainly be pissed if someone could see what he was doing at all times.
Harry resolves to figure out a way to control this particular ability. He likes the security it brings but with how many people are here – even the ones he can Sense from here – is too much to deal with daily. He doesn’t want to imagine how overwhelming it would be to sense the entirety of Sanctuary at all times.
Harry sighs and sits up, pausing when he sees the coffee table. There are clothes waiting for him, folded neatly and piled with underwear and socks on top. Sirius or Lucille must have left it there. A quick whiff and recoil has him deciding its a good idea to take another shower. He grabs the clothes and heads to the bathroom, leaving the door cracked about a foot because the walls began to lean in again. Setting the clothes on the counter and finding a clean towel hanging on the rack, Harry hesitates before shucking his clothes. He piles them neatly near the door and steps into the shower to start it. The water starts out freezing but thankfully warms quickly to nearly unbearable temperatures. Harry stays under the hot spray, revelling in the heat and burn after how many icy cold showers he was made to endure.
Harry didn’t enjoy his last one. He thoroughly enjoys this one.
After the rather lovely hot shower, Harry dries off and pulls on the new clothes. Boxers, loose jeans, a graphic yellow and black shirt and socks. Harry fingers the black socks with a small smile, pulling them on and relishing in the lack of white. He ignores how the walls lean over him as he grabs his old sleep clothes and studiously watches his shirt as he leaves the bathroom. There’s no hamper, so Harry sets them on the back of the couch for later.
Harry decides to cook breakfast for everyone. There are eggs sitting on the counter, slightly stale homemade bread sitting under a cloth and some rather fresh tomatoes in the fridge. It's not much, certainly but there's enough to make some omelettes. With a dash of some cooking oil on hand, the scent of cooking eggs and toasting bread wakes the rest of the household in very little time.
One of the Flames in the far room suddenly approaches.
"Good morning, Harry," Lucille calls out softly.
Harry glances over his shoulder and gives the older woman a smile, "Morning Lucille. I hope you like omelettes."
The Flame in the other room moves towards the bathroom.
"I don't mind them," she replies easily, going on the cupboards and taking out some plates. She sets them on the counter in a pile next to the single one with three steaming omelettes lay. "Good to see you awake on your own. You feeling better?"
Harry nods as he transfers an omelette to each plate, placing two thinly sliced pieces of toast on each helping, "Much."
Lucille helpfully takes the plates to the table. The toilet flushes in the background and a moment later, Zoey comes stumbling into the kitchen, rubbing her eyes groggily.
"Morning, Zo," Harry greets at the same time as Lucille's, "Morning, sweetie."
"Morning," Zoey yawns out, padding up to Harry and draping around him in a groggy hug. Harry chuckles and wraps his arm around her in turn, the other expertly flipping the omelette that's almost done cooking. Zoey nuzzles into his shoulder, "You're awake. I was worried."
"I think I was just really tired," Harry replies easily, transferring the omelette to the waiting plate. Lucille takes it with a soft smile as Harry pours more eggs into the pan.
"Are you going back to sleep?" Zoey asks, pulling away to grab utensils and cups.
Harry shakes his head, "No, I think I've slept quite enough." He teases the edges of the omelette as it cooks.
"So…" Zoey leads on hopefully. Harry looks at her and she continues, "Wanna see the rest of Sanctuary?"
Harry cocks his head, thinking. He certainly doesn't want to be in the house all day – the walls almost feel as if they’re breathing for how they lean in and ease back - but he needs to speak to Negan and Lucille before he does anything else. He doesn't want to spend more time than necessary away from Zoey's company, as he wasn't really joking when he said he'd have a heart attack if she was out of his sight for more than five minutes. He couldn't really help the last couple days, the way he conked right out but now that he's awake and aware, he finds the thought deeply unsettling. It was a downright miracle to find them again; Harry and Sirius could have wandered for weeks in the dead city trying to find them. With the added knowledge of why the Commonwealth is after Zoey, Harry finds himself utterly reluctant to let her wander out of reach.
"How about I introduce Harry to the Saviors first," Negan cuts in, voice a little rough from sleep. Harry turns at the same time as Zoey to see the man sit at the table. Harry hadn’t even Sensed him come out. Maybe it really does depend on his ability to focus on it. "And then you two can wander around?"
"How long will that take?" Zoey asks before Harry can say anything. She walks to the table to set down the load of cups and utensils and sits as well.
Negan grabs a fork right away and stabs the omelette as he replies, "An hour? Maybe two?"
"How about we just eat and then decide from there?" Lucille offers, approaching Harry as he transfers the finished omelette to the plate.
"Where's Sirius?" Harry asks as he puts the last two toast on the plate as well.
"I gave him a room on the floor below," Negan states, already almost finished his omelette.
That takes Harry off guard. He stares down at the omelette he had made for Sirius blankly, "Okay." Why didn't they give… that bright, solid Flame he can still sense under his feet is probably his Godfather.
"Harry?" Lucille says gently, a hand landing on his shoulder. Harry flinches away, not expecting the contact and nearly hip checks the counter. Hurt flashes across Lucille's face but smooths out instantly, making Harry faintly wonder if he had actually seen it. Her hand hovers for a moment and then drops, clasping with the other as she says, "Sorry, dear. You were just…"
Harry shakes his head, dropping his eyes to the bereft omelette again, "No. No, I wasn't expecting Sirius to be given a room. It's fine."
Negan turns in his seat, brow furrowed in concern, "We don't have space for him here."
Space? He saw three bedrooms… well, he guesses they intend one for him. Probably the middle one, which has no windows and resembles the White Room too much for Harry to even poke his head back into. Harry is more than happy to sleep on the couch for the foreseeable future.
Still, Harry would be far more comfortable if Sirius was closer.
"He can have the middle room?" Harry ventures slowly, almost hesitantly.
"No, that's your room," Lucille says firmly, seating herself at the table. "Zoey spent a lot of time and effort on it for you."
Zoey looks stricken. Harry told her what the White Room was like and he hopes she understands why he's offering the room to Sirius instead. Harry can't… he won't spend any time in that room. He'd rather sleep on the roof.
Harry would also feel a lot better if Sirius was actually living with them.
"Sirius is perfectly fine where he is," Negan states evenly, polishing off his food. "He's got a safe place to sleep and he comes to eat with us. I don't see what the big deal is."
"Did you see your room, Harry?" Lucille asks with a smile, looking excited.
Harry's appetite dwindles into nothing and a maw opens up in the back of his mind. His world narrows at the edges as he tries to think of an excuse not to. He can’t go in there. He won’t.
"I changed my mind," Zoey cuts in, gaining strange looks from Lucille and Negan. She gazes at them with a peculiar look in her eyes and a frown on her lips. "I think Harry and I should trade rooms."
Slowly, the dark edges recede and Harry tries to remember to breathe as Negan asks, "Where did this come from?"
Zoey rolls her eyes, "I need a reason to change my mind? I don't want the window anymore. The sun keeps waking me up anyway."
"... you have curtains?" Lucille inserts, confusion lacing her tone. "And you worked so hard-"
"Ma," Zoey cuts Lucille off rather rudely. "It's not a big deal-"
"Hey," Negan snips in a warning tone. "Watch your tone, young lady."
"If it's all the same to you, I'd rather sleep on the couch," Harry finally says, interrupting the argument before it can take off. Having them argue over nothing is making him feel massively uncomfortable. He didn’t mean to start one, he just can’t bring himself to admit why he can’t take the room.
"I'm still not seeing what the fuck the big deal is," Negan says with a shrug and turning to level Harry with a disappointed stare, "The fuck is going on? Lucille said you were acting weird, too."
Lucille drops her head into her hand and groans, "That's not what I said, Negan."
Harry shakes his head, scowl worming its way onto his face, "Zoey doesn't need to trade. If you don't want Sirius here, that's fine, just say so. I'm not taking the room."
"Why not?" Negan throws his hands up in exasperation. "Throw me a bone, Harry."
"Dad!" Zoey abruptly stands up, her food entirely untouched and levels Negan with a glare. "Drop it. Harry doesn't have to tell you shit."
Negan and Lucille whip their heads toward Zoey in shock. Negan points a finger at her, "I'm not appreciating your attitude, Zoey. Watch it."
“Just listen for once!” Zoey slams her hand on the table in her mounting frustration. The air gains a level of tension at the backtalk. Negan’s lips thin as he reigns in his anger.
“What’s gotten into you?” Lucille asks a bit faintly, very clearly bothered by the unusual temper tantrum.
“I will not be spoken to like that,” Negan stands slowly, lording over Zoey like one long, menacing demon.
“If you-” Zoey goes to argue again, the tension thickening to choking levels.
"Guys!” Harry snaps, immediately gaining their attention. The spiel tumbles out of his mouth before he can think about it - he just wants the negative, angry atmosphere to stop, “I was locked in a small room for most of the winter.” Negan, Lucille and Zoey look at him, the former two askance. Harry feels incredibly self-conscious but continues, "I-er... please stop arguing. Zoey was just trying to help me."
Lucille's hand covers her mouth, muffling the sounds of grief that wants to escape. The other wraps around her middle, as if to give herself a hug.
"Harry…" Negan utters softly, sounding heartbroken and tired. His shoulders slump like a heavy weight suddenly slammed into them, dragging them right down.
"I appreciate the effort that went into getting that room ready for me and your help, Zo but I don't… want a room. I'm perfectly happy with the couch, I promise." Harry assures, eyeing both of them to gauge their reactions.
Lucille nods, wiping at the tear that managed to escape her control, "Of course, dear. It's okay."
Negan sighs, rubbing the bridge of his nose, "Yeah, it's fine. You can sleep where you want."
"We'll haul out the dresser for you," Lucille smiles, trying to hide how much the information is bothering her. She isn't very successful.
"Good idea, Hon’," Negan says, nodding. "I'll actually get another bed and we'll set it up in the corner for you, Harry. No need to sleep on the couch."
Zoey pipes up, looking far happier than a few moments ago, "That's a great idea!"
Harry feels relieved as the tense atmosphere dissipates and shrugs at their suggestions, "If you want. Would it…" Lucille and Negan look at him, almost hopefully. Harry very nearly balks but powers on, feeling the need to have Sirius close at hand. "... would it be too much trouble to give Sirius that room?"
Negan inhales carefully and asks, "Why?"
Harry bites his lip and shrugs again, "We haven't had enough time together. We only found each other properly a week ago when he regained his memories and he's the reason I managed to escape the military," Harry looks down at the now cold omelette, the lie surprisingly light on his tongue. Harry hates to lie, to Zoey especially, but Negan and Lucille have become very dear to him as well. It's a necessary lie but that doesn't make it better; it doesn't really make him feel better about it. "Look, I know it's a lot to ask but I wouldn't be asking if I didn't feel strongly about it."
Negan sighs heavily and sits back down, "Come sit down, Harry. Zoey, you wanna go get Sirius?"
Harry jolts, "No-!" he cuts himself off, just a little surprised at how strongly he felt about Zoey leaving his sight. Lucille and Negan look at him in concern.
Zoey shakes her head, looking between her parents and Harry with a conflicted expression, "I don't think I should do that."
Lucille clears her throat, "I will. Be right back."
Negan is about to protest but Lucille sends him a Look that quells the man back into his seat. Then she sends Harry a comforting smile and leaves with a quiet click of the door.
Zoey steps around the table, determinedly approaching Harry to wrap around him. Harry sighs, tension he hadn't realized was there seeping away from the contact. The walls, steadily closing in on Harry, almost seem to shift back into place languidly.
"We definitely need to talk," Negan says at length, watching them from his seat at the table. His face is troubled.
"Come on, Harry," Zoey mumbles, not separating from him but instead pulling him towards the table. Harry goes, trying to reconcile his reaction to himself. He knew it wasn't a joke but he hadn't realized the severity of it. Harry can't quite explain, even to himself, why his reaction was so strong. Zoey wouldn't have been gone for more than five minutes but the thought of her leaving out that door and never reappearing had been overwhelming. Harry knows, intellectually, rationally, that she would have been back in a few minutes, Sirius in tow but emotionally? Mentally? That's harder to explain. Harder to overcome. Harry hadn't quite realized the extent the White Room messed him up.
Zoey feels solid and real in his arms, in a way that his memories severely lacked during his long, long hours locked in the Room. Thankfully he hadn't gone far enough to start hallucinating her in the Room with him but he knows now even that wasn't too far off. If he hadn't turned the gun on himself, hadn't taken himself out, had tried to turn the gun on the Matron and failed…
Harry turns his mind away and releases Zoey. She smiles at him and sits back down in her seat to start eating. Harry retakes his own chair with the now cold omelette and toast on the plate in front of him. He should eat it anyway. When was the last time he had an omelette? Or toast?
The supper they shared two days ago brought back some strong feelings. Harry enjoys Lucille's cooking; something about her food, at times unorthodox because of the supply of food they had, was always delicious and warming in ways beyond the temperature. The meals they shared in the basement of that house soothed something in Harry he hadn't realized was ruffled. Harry can't remember any of the meals he had with his family in his previous life, can't remember what foods his children liked and disliked, what Ginny's laugh sounds like or if they shared any secret, loving looks across the table like what Negan and Lucille do. It had been bittersweet to watch them act like Harry imagined he and Ginny did… hoped they did.
Large, strong hands settle on Harry's shoulders and though he startles out of his thoughts, he immediately relaxes. He looks over his shoulder just as Sirius greets with, "Morning, Pup."
Harry quirks a smile, everything feeling right again, "Hey, Sir'." His Sense fades back into view in the back of his mind. It really does depend on him focusing on it.
Sirius ruffles the little hair on Harry's head and then steps around the table, asking, "You slept a while. Feeling any better?" Harry slowly grabs a fork while he watches Sirius grab the plate on the counter and bring it to the table, sitting down at the end next to Harry like he belonged there the entire time. Sirius immediately digs in, saying with a full mouth, "Lulu-bell-"
Negan straightens, looking at Lucille who is a little flushed from the nickname and asks in a light, deceiving tone, "Lulu-bell?"
"-filled me in," Sirius continues to talk, ignoring Negan's reaction and swallows the bite. "You sure you don't want to move in with me downstairs?"
Lucille pats Negan's hand with a murmur, too low to make out but the man settles back with a grumble.
"He's staying here," Zoey glares at Sirius as she shoves a bite into her mouth, chewing aggressively.
Sirius raises a brow at her, "She is Miss Bossy."
Zoey splutters, looking at Harry, who is trying and failing to not smile, "Told you. And I'd rather you take the room, Sir'."
Sirius and Negan lock eyes, seeming to have a stare down for a long, long few moments. The air gains a tinge of tension as the two remain unmoving before Sirius raises a sarcastic brow and Negan finally sighs. Then, Negan picks up his plate and stands, "Fine. He can have the room. But Harry gets the bed and you," Negan points at Sirius imperiously. "Have to move it out and get it situated in the corner over there." Negan gestures lazily before turning around to set his plate in the sink.
Yet again, the tension dissipates and Sirius smiles smugly, replying serenely, "No problem at all." He winks at Harry and gets back to his food.
Harry hides his amusement at the stare down and subsequent wink, finally digging into his breakfast with a renewed appetite.
"Okay, Harry," Negan says seriously, sitting back down. "We're going to have a family meeting-" Harry nearly chokes on the bite of egg. Family meeting? "-before I take you down to meet the Council and my Saviors. We'll need to tell them about you before we make plans to vaccinate everyone in Sanctuary. Then you and Zoey can do whatever you'd like for the rest of the day."
"...okay?" Harry answers almost awkwardly after swallowing. He's still reeling a little from the family meeting. It's not like Harry doesn't consider them close and important, most definitely friends if not approaching close friends but it hadn't quite gotten to the level of family for him. He considers himself too old for them to step into parental roles and it seems too… weird to consider Lucille and Negan as an older brother and sister, given their age. Uncle? Aunt? Harry doesn't have the best memories of those kinds of familial connections and doesn't really feel comfortable putting them into that role in his life.
In another life, Harry would have called Sirius and Remus Uncles, had his parents never died. But that's a different life and the only experience he's had with Aunts and Uncles remains Petunia and Vernon.
Negan leans onto the table top, "First off, I'm the leader of this joint, so what I say, goes-"
Lucille delicately clears her throat.
"-but Lu here is the real Queen," Negan smoothly changes tactics, motioning to her. She smiles, seeming abashed by the title. "So if you have a problem, best to go to her. I have a buncha people called the Saviors that I coordinate for a lotta shit, which you'll be meeting in a bit. They basically guard Sanctuary and the main roads between the other communities. Volunteer Saviors from the other communities guard their own roads, for the most part, we just bolster their numbers. Due to this, there's a lot of information trading happening all the time. You following me?"
Harry nods. It's not hard to follow.
Negan bobs his head and continues. "Alrighty. Everyone works to eat. Anyone who isn’t a Savior and is able and willing to make runs into the city are Runners. Those who prefer to stay within the walls are Workers. There's a constant list of jobs for people to complete and if you don't want to work, you don't eat. Do extra work and you get Points to use for shit you need. It's kinda like money. Simple, right? If you’re a Savior, you get to eat once a day without working but we track that shit so nobody can be lazy. I have Rules in place that are Enforced," Harry has a feeling that Negan has had to enforce his Rules quite a few times in a brutal way and makes a mental note to talk to the man in a far more private setting. "By yours truly to keep people in line. Any questions?"
The information is basically easy to follow. You work, you eat. Runners find supplies, Workers do most of the labour within Sanctuary – though, Harry assumes that the jobs on rotation are available for everyone to do - and the Saviors guard the roads. Negan and Lucille run Sanctuary equally; Lucille, the management and administration side, Negan the protection and enforcement. They make an effective duo. The only thing Harry would like to know is- "What will Sir' and I be doing, then?"
Negan sits back, "Sirius has already agreed to join the Saviors but he insisted on being your protection, which, looking at you," Negan's eyes turn a bit sad and a lot angry, though his face doesn't give anything away as he looks at Harry's neck. "Is a damn good idea. Your job, Harry, is less clear. I want to give you time to… rest, recover, get better, take your pick. This isn't negotiable."
Harry doesn't like it. He's been inactive for a long time, months. Months of sitting on his ass, doing nothing in fear of the Matron finding out about his other magical abilities and tightening her hold on him. Being constantly drained of magic, energy, free will. Harry doesn't want to rest. There's too much work to do.
"I don't think I can do that," Harry replies evenly, pushing the half finished omelette away from himself.
Negan shakes his head, "Harry, you look like shit, okay? Give yourself time-"
"All I've had is time!" Harry snaps, standing and slamming his hands on the table. The plates and forks shake under the abrupt act of violence. Negan and Lucille stare at him in surprise. "All day, every day, just sitting around doing nothing. I'm done with that! There's so much that needs to be done! Preparations! Defences! We don't have the luxury of time right now!"
Sirius and Zoey are watching the proceedings silently, knowing what Harry is getting at. Negan spreads his hands in confusion, "Harry, what are you talking about?"
Harry levels Sirius with a disappointed stare, "You didn't tell them?"
Sirius shrugs, not looking even an ounce guilty, "This is your show, Harry. I didn't think they'd believe me."
"Tell us what?" Lucille asserts firmly, glancing between Harry and Sirius.
Harry sighs, feeling aggravated. Sirius has a point but that doesn't mean Harry is happy with having to take point in this conversation. He swipes a hand through his hair, the same vague disappointment rearing it's familiar head at the shortness and then answers, "Sirius had been part of a large, powerful conglomerate of people of roughly fifty thousand." Negan's and Lucille's jaws drop a little at the sudden bomb. "He isn't, now that he's regained his memories and we were reunited. He told me as much as he could about the Commonwealth, as they like to call themselves and the picture he painted isn't a good one."
Zoey pulls into herself. Negan and Lucille digest the information Harry just dumped all over the table. Harry eyes her in concern but let's her be, for now. She must still be working through what they talked about on the roof.
"You and Sirius can discuss the specifics later," Harry continues after a minute or so. "What is actually important is what we need to do to prepare for the eventuality of the Commonwealth finding us and the communities associated with us. I don't have time to rest, recover, all that rot because there is too much to do as it is."
Negan shakes his head as if to clear it, "Level with me. What are we dealing with?"
"The remnants of the American army and a bunch of megalomaniacs playing God and Apostles with the rest of mankind," Sirius answers succinctly. Everyone looks at Sirius as he continues, "The majority of the Commonwealth are regular people; they work, eat, sleep like the world didn't end and are given rights and privileges directly associated with their pre-Outbreak occupation and status. However, the rest are scientists, bigwig corporate managers and the Army under the command of General Michael Mercer. The entirety of the Commonwealth is being led by the current Governor Pamela Milton."
"We're against fifty thousand people?" Negan asks in a high pitch, disbelieving tone. He throws his hands up, "Why don't we just join them if they have such good shit?"
"Because they’re experimenting on their own people," Sirius answers with a scowl, making Negan still in shock. "Trying to find a cure. A way to weaponize the Infected. They assimilate communities whole, kill any that may fight the New World Order and raze the rest to the ground. They are not good people."
"Why?" Lucille asks in horror, her face, once peachy pink, is now pallid. "Why would they do that?"
Sirius sits back, shrugging, "Because they can. They have more guns, ammunition, vehicles, manpower than anyone. Who is around to keep them in check? The government is gone."
"What can we do against them?" Negan asks, his tone laced with deep concern.
"We have a few points on our side," Sirius answers, lifting a hand to count fingers. "The majority of their firepower remains in their city to keep the walls safe and order in the streets. Only small teams are deployed into the wild for any given reason. You guys are hidden; they have no idea you’re here. The upside to all this shit is that it's much harder to find free communities because of the sheer amount of abandoned space and how well hidden they are. There are millions of dead marching the country sides and the cities, so it's hard for them to manoeuvre effectively. Your proximity to the city would be considered high risk because the potential to draw the Infected in mass quantities is too high. While they have airborne vehicles up the nose, fuel is getting more and more precious and harder to find, so they will be forced to send their troops by land, which significantly reduces their power. They have other priorities than assimilating free communities, so that further reduces the potential numbers that can be deployed against us."
"Have they had any luck finding a cure?" Lucille inquires, making Zoey shrink in on herself.
"In a way," Sirius replies, glancing at Zoey.
Lucille and Negan's brows furrow but it's the former that catches on. Lucille gasps quietly, one hand going to her mouth and the other grasping Negan's tightly. "No."
"Hon?" Negan half turns to look at his wife in concern. Lucille's grip tightens, the knuckles turning white and making Negan wince, his poor fingers beginning to turn red.
Zoey looks up, between her parents and then to Harry, who smiles at her encouragingly. It's her secret. It's her burden. If she wants to share it, it's up to her but Harry hopes she doesn't share it far. The more people that know, the more likely it will spread beyond their circle and get back to people who have no business knowing. Zoey inhales deeply, seeming to find some strength in Harry's gaze and turns back to her parents.
"They did find a cure," Zoey states, voice even if a little faint. "From my blood."
"What?!" Negan snaps incredulously, going to stand and pausing when Lucille's free hand lands on his arm. He looks at her as she looks at him and somehow, an entire conversation takes place. After a few tense moments, wherein Zoey eyes her parents warily, Negan sits down and demands, "Explain."
Zoey shrinks in on herself again.
Sirius takes over, Negan and Lucille's eyes snapping to him, "When the Brass suspected Zoey's immunity to the HZN1 Virus, they used the CCTV cameras in Atlanta to identify her. Once they did, they located a sample of her blood in the hospital she and her parents had been taken to following an automobile accident-" here, Harry slings his arm over Zoey's shoulder for support, as it can't be easy rehearing about the accident that killed her Father. She leans into him wordlessly, eyes on the table. "-wherein they drew her blood for mandated testing. They didn't use all of it and kept the rest on ice. I led a team into that hospital to retrieve that sample and when I brought it back, they synthesized an actual vaccine out of it. They only had enough for a single test but it proved effective."
"Okay, so let me get this straight," Negan states, sounding angry and exasperated. "We need to do a bunch of crap to prepare for The Galactic Empire's invasion plans to get my little girl for her blood?"
Harry has often encountered many phrases that absolutely go right over his head and this one is no different. Sirius seems to get it because he nods solemnly, "Milton is Darth Sidious and Mercer is like her own personal Darth Vader."
Negan grits his teeth, "Yeah, no. That's not happening. Fuck that."
"What do you guys have in mind?" Lucille asks, regaining a little colour but remaining pale.
"First order of business is to vaccinate every resident of every community we know of," Harry states, drawing everyone's attention. "If I vaccinate our allies, the Commonwealth won't be able to offer the cure to them. This will also strengthen our ties with them, so when the time comes to fight back, we will have an army of our own. If people aren't scared of turning, for any reason, it will raise morale. Bolster our strength and determination."
Negan bobs his head, considering it, "Alright, worth a shot. How do we go about that? You want to travel to each community separately?"
"Eventually," Harry allows. "I believe it best to call the Leader of each community to Sanctuary for a summit of sorts. Explain the situation, minus Zoey's status - that stays here-" everyone is in agreement for that one. "-we'll work on what to tell them. We will need to tell them what I can do, that's unavoidable. I'll vaccinate them and they can go back to their respective communities to inform their people and wait for their word to get back to us. Then, we can make plans to travel to each to vaccinate their people."
"How many can you vaccinate in one session?" Lucille asks calculatingly. "How much time will you need to spend in each community?"
Harry shrugs, "I don't know. My powers have… grown, exponentially. We will have to adjust our plans when I have more information."
Lucille nods, sitting back, eyes distant as she thinks.
"I will be healing anyone in need of it," Harry says evenly. "Now more than ever Sanctuary needs to be a pillar to which the other communities need to aspire to. I help them without asking for anything in return and they may be inspired to do the same. Right now, though you two have done a wonderful job uniting the communities in the area, we need to be more so. We cannot simply be Sanctuary and soso and them anymore."
"That sounds lovely, actually," Lucille smiles, coming back to the moment only to imagine what such a unification would look like.
Negan leans forward, "Alright. What's the second part of this shindig?"
"We need to bolster our own supplies and ammunition; weapons, foods, medicine. The less the Commonwealth has to offer the people, the less of a foothold they will have when the time comes," Sirius replies confidently. "Defenses, expansions. I've seen how many people are here and you guys are reaching the threshold. Even ten more survivors will leave you with no space to put them. People will feel more willing to fight for their homes, fight for Sanctuary, if they feel like they aren't being pushed out."
"We've been directing people to Hilltop, that does have the space but I see your point," Lucille says. "Eventually they will run out too."
Sirius quirks a grin at her, "Exactly. If we plan it right and with the right materials, we can expand Sanctuary to include the surrounding land and buildings. It will need to be section by section so we don't stretch your resources but I have a feeling that we'll need the extra space."
"Why do you say that?" Negan asks curiously.
Sirius grimaces, "Because the Commonwealth doesn't hold back when they assimilate communities. If anyone manages to escape, their first thought will likely be to find Sanctuary for shelter. Once our little conflict with the Commonwealth has begun, it's likely we'll be flooded by refugees. On top of that, once word gets out that Harry is offering a free vaccination to any survivor… you'll have people showing up in droves."
"Can you specify what you mean by assimilating?" Lucille inquires with a touch of concern in her tone.
"Think Borg," Sirius states solemnly. Negan and Lucille both frown. Harry doesn't know what it means. "If you don't join them, they kill you. Flat out. They don't let you go, they don't give you mercy. They literally assimilate survivors and not all of them make it into the streets of the Commonwealth. The majority are instead experimented on."
"That's horrible," Lucille utters faintly.
"No kidding," Zoey finally speaks up, sounding equally horrified.
"Okay, first vaccinating, then expansion, defences, blah blah. What else?" Negan asks after a moment.
"Plans," Harry and Sirius say together at the same time. "Plans for plans on top of plans," Sirius continues. "Contingencies, exits, attack, defence, traps. We have the home field advantage here. The Commonwealth has the benefit of maps, images of the area but you guys know the lay of the land far better than any map can tell them."
Negan nods and shares a loaded glance with Lucille. She tilts her head a little and Negan's eyes soften. Then he asks, "Anything else?"
Sirius shrugs, "So far, no."
Negan sighs explosively, leaning back and nearly slumping into the seat, "Alrighty. You two have given us a lot to think about," he grasps Lucille's hand and squeezes gently. "Lucille and I need to talk about… well, everything."
Lucille stands, trying to smile but not really managing one, "In the meantime, Harry, regardless of these plans of yours, nothing can be done for a few days at the least. Even if you don't rest, it would be best if you took some time to… acclimate. De-stress, so to speak."
"Yes," Negan agrees, standing as well. "Zoey’s been dying to show you Sanctuary. Let's get the introductions out of the way and then you two can skedaddle."
Zoey perks up out, practically vibrating right out of the chair, "Yeah! Come on, Harry!"
Harry can't help the grin as Zoey literally pulls him out of his chair, "Okay, okay." He looks at Sirius and asks, "Sir'?"
Sirius raises his hands, "On your own, Pup. I have a bed to move and a bedroom to move into. Go have fun, hm?"