02 - car accident, “don’t move, you’ll be okay”
On the car drive home from James and lily’s house Sirius just sat staring at the road pouting slightly. Remus was also angry gripping the steering wheel eyebrows furrowed. They’d just had a heated argument regarding children, safe to say they had very different opinions. Sirius wanted a little kid to nurture and hang out with whereas Remus was more stressed about full moons and how fucked up the kid would be.
“Y’know I’d be able to manage looking after the kid by myself one night a month-“
“Just fucking drop it Sirius I don’t want kids.” Remus glares at him putting his foot down really just wanting to get home. Sirius goes quiet again watching the trees fwip by, although you couldn’t really see them with how dark it is but I suppose he didn’t need too - he knew these woods like the back of his hand.
“I think you’d be a real good dad moony” he hums not looking at him. Remus turns his head away from the road eyes narrowed in anger jaw tensed. “Shut up! For two seconds Sirius can you not just stop fucking talking for once!” When Sirius turns to angrily snap back Remus didn’t look back to the road not until Sirius got up in his face forcing him to look forward grabbing the wheel and swerving before he could hit the car coming right for them.
It might sound cliche, but for Sirius it really was like everything was happening in slow motion. He watched remus’ eyes widen then his arms come up to cover his face when the windshield shattered against a tree. Sirius failed to cover himself in any way more focused on the ripple of remus’ skin and the clear fear on his face. The glass scattered like a cruel glitter as the metal of the car screeched loudly trying to fight against the pressure hitting it.
When the car finally went still Sirius was scared to move his ears ringing painfully. He heard Remus groan next to him then the sound of glass clinking as it fell off his body. As Remus moved and stretched Sirius stayed completely stationary staring at Remus with foggy vision, He didn’t even want to look at his numb body he was too much of a coward to do so.
“Sirius? Love?” Remus’ voice came out distorted and fuzzy like it were some kind of extraterrestrial rather than the love of his life.
“Hm?” Sirius hums back best he can throat feeling far too dry but also like it was flooding all at the same time. “Are you okay?” Remus wouldn’t look at him, maybe he was just as much a coward as Sirius - trying to convince himself that nothing had happened and it was all okay. “M’not sure” his voice gurgles a strange heat dribbling down his chin. At that Remus’ head immediately flicks to him “oh fuck-“
Suddenly the distortion was gone the world less foggy as Remus began to panic and clatter around for his phone. Sirius looked around the car trying to properly take it in, the shredded leather, the dented roof, the large piece of wood that had seemed to of snapped off a tree lodged deep in Sirius’ abdomen. He couldn’t even feel it - well he could but it wasn’t a pain more a pressure like when you’re getting teeth pulled.
Remus was busy on his phone calling an ambulance stuck in his own little bubble of fear and anxiety. Sirius tried his best to stay calm but maybe it was Remus having a full on panic attack that made it hard to do so. He started to shift nervously, jolting his abdomen and making the pain actually show up. He was fucked. “Remus- please talk to me” he pleads desperately, feeling horribly alone and terrified. “I’m here Sirius there’s an ambulance on the way-“ he reassures grabbing Sirius’ hand using his other hand to comb through his hair restlessly.
“What do I do?” Tears sprouted in his eyes as he tried to come to terms with what was happening. “Just don’t move, you’ll be okay” Remus instructs finally seeming empathetic - soothing. He squeezed Remus’ hand trying to his best to stay functioning and awake as he felt his mind slipping. He wiped at his chin only more of the warm sticky liquid trickling out of his mouth - that seemed to alarm Remus but he wasn’t focused now.
He started to realise this was all his fault, if he just hadn’t pestered Remus then he would’ve focused on the road and it would be fine, Remus wouldn’t be losing a partner, James wouldn’t be losing a brother nor regulus. He managed to completely block Remus out instead focusing on the trees counting them until they started to shake and he had to start again. Then he saw lights, red and blue flashing ones, at first he thought he was imagining things but Remus gripped his hand tighter and stuck his head out the window yelling loudly making Sirius pull away sluggishly.
He considered Remus to be stupid giving himself false hope when he was in this condition, what an idiot. An idiot who never left his side, not when they were getting him out the car nor in the ambulance or even at the hospital - James had to bring him a change of clothes after he refused to leave seeing Sirius was actually going to make it. What a shame. It seemed to happen in a blur, from the ambulance ride to the ICU to recovery it seemed to happen at the flick of a match like no time had passed at all. Though it seemed different for Remus.
Remus looked tired and I’m pain constantly as well as rather unhygienic. But the only thing on Sirius’ mind was whether saving him was the right choice, sure regulus and James would lose a brother and Remus a partner but maybe that would be better for everyone. No, he knows it would be. For now he supposes he’ll keep quiet, let people bring him flowers, pretend he didn’t purposefully fail to tell Remus a car was approaching. It would all be fine.