Capture the Moment
It started like any other morning, with James waking up quite abruptly to the sound of his alarm, blinking sleep out of his eyes and wishing for another hour's sleep. Unusually though, as he sat up to start his day, he was hit with an insane wave of dizziness. Putting the back of his hand to his forehead revealed that he was probably running a fever. Reluctantly, he called out to his parents, despite knowing all too well that today was the day of their senior class photo.
“I don't think I can go to school today," James said in defeat, once his mother had reached his bedroom.
"Oh, sweetheart. Are you feeling okay? Do you need anything?" James' mum replied with concern.
"Just some rest, I think. I'm sorry I'll miss the photo," James muttered.
"Don't worry about it sweet. Your health comes first," she reassured him, "plus, I don't think your classmates would appreciate your sickness passed onto them."
James smiled, despite the disappointment he felt at this milestone being missed. This was their last year, and the photo would still be taken without him, as if he was never even there. James, as someone who was big on legacy, and being remembered, naturally was not happy about this. Wrapped in layers of blankets, he drifted in and out of sleep throughout the day, occasionally checking his phone for updates from his friends. He tried not to dwell on missing out, but the knowledge that he was absent weighed heavily on his mind all day. James hated missing out more than anything in the world, so despite the fact that this photo really didn't mean all that much, he still felt nauseous whenever he remembered he wouldn’t be in it.
Hours later, when the clock hit 3 and school let out, James mustered the energy to check his messages again. What he saw made his heart sink: a flood of notifications from his friends, each accompanied by a copy of the photo.
"James man, you missed out big time! Check this out!" Sirius had texted.
Scrolling through the pictures, James felt the icy pang of regret as he saw his classmates posing in their graduation gowns, each smile frozen in time. But then he saw him, Regulus, standing tall and somehow effortlessly cool in the front row, his new long hair tousled so perfectly. Regulus had always been handsome, but today, it was as if the camera had captured a side of Regulus that James had never even seen before, a side that left James both awestruck and aching.
Throughout the afternoon, James lingered over memories of past school events: football games, school plays, late-night study sessions with friends, all moments leading up to this final year. Each memory seemed to mock him now, reminding him of the day he spent in bed while all his friends gathered for the one photo they'd all look back on in year's time, a photo without James. He sighed, throwing himself back under the covers, why did he have to be so goddamn sentimental…
ᯓ★
The next day at school, James returned, his fever having subsided but his heart still a little heavy. As he walked through the hallways, his eyes kept drifting to Regulus, talking with Barty and Evan. He couldn't help but notice how Regulus's laughter seemed to light up the room, James couldn't tear his eyes away. Each glance stirred a feeling in James’ chest that he hadn’t felt for a very, very long time, a silent wish that he could bridge the gap that seemed to be between them.
Sirius nudged him, obviously waiting for his reaction to a joke that he hadn’t heard, and James laughed, trying to play off his distraction, but deep down, the image of Regulus in that photo lingered in his mind. How in the hell is he supposed to look Regulus in the eye ever again, knowing that a simple photo of him in a fucking cap and gown is getting James hot and bothered? Him and that stupid hair. James couldn't decide if he was grateful or angry at the photo for existing.
That night, James sat alone in his room, the class photo printed out and resting on his desk, relentlessly mocking him. He traced Regulus's effortless half-smile with his finger, feeling the ache of missed opportunity and the unrelenting desire to just… understand the enigma that was Regulus Black. He had thought he'd understood Regulus once, a long time ago... maybe one day he would understand him again.