Regulus knew it was a bad idea. He hadn’t told anyone where he was going or what he was doing because he knew everyone would try to talk him out of it. He knew it was a bad idea, but when had that ever stopped him from making a decision once his mind was set?
He and Barty broke up for a reason. Barty was controlling and impulsive and Regulus was over it. He was over being controlled by anyone but himself. That didn’t stop him from ringing the bell at two in the morning. He was desperate and lonely.
So yes, Regulus knew it was a bad idea. But when Barty opened the door, all his tattoos on display due to his lack of a shirt, smirking, like he knew Regulus couldn’t stay away for long, Regulus pushed past him and went straight for the bedroom. He stripped down and fell onto the bed. Moments later, Barty followed him, shoving his trousers off and claiming his spot between Regulus’ thighs.
“I was wondering how long I was going to have to wait for you this time.” Barty whispered into his ear before kissing his jaw softly. The only time Barty was soft was when he knew he won. When he got what he felt belonged to him all along. “You didn’t even hold out that long this time. Are you finally ready to admit you were wrong and get back together?”
Regulus held back a groan as Barty ran his hands over his waist to grip his hips, “I just wanted an easy fuck.” He grit out. Barty grinned against his neck as he tightened his hold on Regulus’ hips to the point of pain. Regulus felt his cock against his thigh. Hard and leaking. He opened his mouth to tell Barty to get on with it when he bit down on his neck. Regulus let out an embarrassing moan.
“You could have gone to a pub and picked up anyone if all you wanted was an easy lay. You wanted me, you’re allowed to say it.” When Regulus didn’t speak, Barty bit down again. “Say it.” Regulus’ hands shot out to hold onto Barty’s shoulders. His nails dug into his skin. Regulus hoped he made him bleed.
“Fuck me properly and I might.” Barty smiled again before trailing one of his hands from Regulus’ hip down. He grazed one finger against his folds before pushing it in slowly. Regulus hadn’t accumulated enough wetness for Barty to breach him yet. Barty knew he didn’t produce a lot of slick naturally. Regulus knew he didn’t care as he pumped his finger in and out, the dry friction was on the painful side. He added another finger not long after, spreading them apart, stretching him. Regulus felt his eyes roll back at the feeling.
Barty was moving slowly. Savouring each movement, purposefully avoiding his clit. Regulus could feel himself getting worked up. He wanted more, needed more. The only way he would be able to get it was to give into Barty and his demands.
“I said to fuck me properly, not barely touch me.” Regulus dug his fingers harder into Barty’s shoulders to accentuate his point.
“Maybe you should listen when someone gives you an order, and they’ll feel more inclined to give you what you want.” Barty bit back as he added a third finger. Regulus couldn’t hide his moan at the stretch. It had been a week since he last saw Barty, a week since someone had touched him. He almost wanted to give in just so he could get what he came here for.
“I could still leave. You might be an asshole, but you’ve never crossed the line to keeping me here against my will.” Regulus’ voice was breathier than he wanted it to be. Barty’s ministrations might not be what he was craving, but they were working.
“We both know, if you were going to leave, you wouldn’t have shown up in the first place, baby.” Regulus grit his teeth in annoyance. Barty was right and the worst part was he knew he was right. It pissed him off to no end. “I don’t need to keep you here, when you want to be here. Just say the word and I'll give you exactly what your slutty little body needs.” Regulus wants to say he held out. He wants to say he left the flat and took care of himself, but he can’t.
He closed his eyes before saying, “I wanted you. All I wanted was you, that’s why I’m here.” Barty smiled one more time before leaning down to kiss him. He was no longer being soft or gentle or slow. He devoured Regulus with his kiss, licking into his mouth immediately, biting his lower lip, ripping sounds from Regulus’ mouth that he swallowed down. Barty reached for the bedside table to get a bottle of lube. He popped the lid open and poured some where his fingers hadn’t stopped moving. Regulus felt immediate relief at the newfound slide. He moaned into the kiss and raked his nails down Barty’s back.
Just as he felt heat building at his core, Barty let his fingers slip out of him. He whined at the loss, unable to keep quiet. Barty smirked as he slicked his cock up. He wasted no time, shoving himself into Regulus. There was no reprieve, no time to get used to the intrusion. Barty snapped his hips against Regulus at a brutal pace. His hands were back on his hips, pulling Regulus into the thrusts with even more force. His back arched as he cried out. Barty latched onto his neck, sucking sharp bruises into his skin.
Barty reached a hand down to rub tight circles into his clit. It wasn’t long before the heat began to build again. Regulus felt tears form in the corners of his eyes where they were screwed shut.
“Fuck, Barty, I’m close.” He didn’t say anything, just bit down on the juncture between his neck and shoulder. That was all it took, the flash of pain was the catalyst to the stars behind Regulus’ eyes. Barty didn’t slow down, he kept thrusting at the same vicious pace, alternating between rubbing his clit and pinching it between two fingers. Soon the overstimulation bordered painful, he wanted it to stop, he never wanted it to end. He cried out again when Barty suddenly stopped thrusting and pressed deep inside him. Regulus felt him come inside him.
Neither of them moved for a moment, catching their breath. Barty rolled off of him and stood up. He went into the bathroom, and Regulus heard water running. He came back out holding a wet cloth. He was soft again as he cleaned Regulus up. Barty knew he won. He knew and Regulus wanted to claw his skin off over it. Barty finished wiping him off and crawled back into bed. He pulled Regulus under the covers with him and threw an arm over his waist. Regulus was facing away from him and could feel the heat he exuded.
He looked at the clock on the bedside table. 3:12. He heard Barty’s breathing even out and extracted himself from his hold. He got what he came here for, and he didn’t plan on sticking around to be reminded, yet again, why he ended things between them.
He got dressed quietly before sneaking out of the flat. He checked his phone. He had four missed calls from Sirius and one from James. There were 28 texts between the two of them. Sirius’ started off as just wondering where he was, why he wasn’t in bed. Regulus had told him to stop checking his room at night to see if he was there. They quickly turned upset as he guessed where he was, then panicked as he continued to not answer. James’ were asking him to respond to Sirius as soon as he could, seeing as his brother was panicking and wouldn’t sleep until he knew Regulus was safe.
Regulus was about to text Sirius when another call from James came through. He answered it, knowing he would be in for it when he got home.
“Hey,” he knew it would piss James off to sound so casual.
“Hey? That’s all you’re going to say? It’s three in the fucking morning and Sirius is about to have a panic attack from how worried he is, and all you have to say is ‘hey’?” Regulus could picture the furrow between James’ brows as he spoke. The tightness in his jaw as he struggled and failed to keep his voice calm.
“Hey, you.” James scoffed.
“Where are you? I’m gonna come pick you up, so Sirius doesn't have an aneurysm.” Regulus rolled his eyes.
“Is Remus there? Can he pick me up instead? I much prefer him over you.”
“Tough. He’s busy keeping Sirius calm.”
Regulus sighed, “Whatever. I’m at Barty’s.” James scoffed again.
“Are you kidding me? Of fucking course you are. You never seem to learn your lesson with that prick.” Regulus shrugged.
“What can I say? He has a nice prick.”
“I’ll be there in 20. Don’t do anything else stupid before I get you.” With that, he hung up. Regulus stared at his phone for a moment, contemplating whether he should text Sirius or not. Eh, James will tell him either way, why bother?
He was scrolling through Instagram when two headlights came down the street. The car stopped in front of him. Regulus got up from where he was sitting on the curb and climbed into the car.
The air conditioning was too cold. He reached out to turn it down, but James slapped his hand away.
“I’m cold.” He reached for the control again.
“I don’t care.” James slapped his hand again.
“Fuck you.” Regulus crossed his arms in front of himself and glared at James. The other man didn’t so much as look at him.
“Don’t even start.” He started driving away. “I honestly can’t believe you. Genuinely, what were you thinking, coming out here to see that asshole without telling anyone?” Regulus didn’t answer, he stared resolutely out the window. “Well? Do you have anything to say for yourself?”
Regulus scoffed, “Oh my god, you are not my dad. Stop acting like you are.” James bristled.
“I’m not acting like your dad.”
“Maybe not like my dad personally, but you’re acting like a dad. ‘Do you have anything to say for yourself? Your mother is going to have an aneurysm’.” He gave his tone a mocking quality. “God, it’s like you’re the parents I never had and didn’t ask for.”
“Maybe if you didn’t act like such an entitled, spoiled, little brat, we wouldn’t have to act like that.”
“Maybe if you minded your own business-”
“You are my business.” James interrupted. Regulus looked over at him and saw his jaw clench. He was trying to keep himself from raising his voice.
“Since fucking when?” Regulus knew exactly when. The moment he got kicked out of his home and moved in with them. The moment Sirius found out he didn’t have a sister, but a brother. The moment he cared about Regulus when no one else did. The car got quiet. They drove the rest of the way in silence as Regulus stewed in anger. He was grateful to his brother, truly. He loved Sirius more than anyone else, but he also wanted to be left alone. Sometimes he was going to make mistakes with his newfound freedom, Sirius needed to let him. Instead, his brother chose the overprotective route and tried to keep him safe in increasingly annoying ways.
At first, he had been glad about it, not that he would ever tell Sirius that. He didn’t know what he was doing or how to live a normal life after being sheltered for so long by their parents. Sirius helped him get a job and let him move in with him and paid for his fucking top surgery and hormones. Regulus wouldn’t be anywhere if not for Sirius, but now he’s taking it too far. Regulus knew he shouldn’t see Barty anymore. Everyone told him right off the bat that he was going to be terrible, but he had been so nice to Regulus and he didn’t mind what he had going on in his pants. Barty started off sweet and loving. Soon, sweet and loving turned to controlling and possessive.
He hated when Regulus did anything without him. He didn’t like that he lived with three other men, ignoring the fact that one was his brother and another was his brother's boyfriend. Regulus tried to go along with it at first. It was his first relationship. He wanted it to work and he thought he loved Barty. It continued on for months. It got worse and worse until Regulus found out Barty had installed a tracking app onto his phone. He broke up with him on the spot and swore to never see him again. He kept that promise for three months, he blocked his number and everything.
Then, Regulus was feeling lonely and he was horny. And no one in those three months had been able to get him off in the same way as Barty. No one made him laugh like Barty had, so he went back. Barty promised to be better. Regulus believed him. They got back together and everything was like the beginning again. Then a couple months later Barty did it again.
And the cycle was born. Regulus broke up with Barty, blocked him until he got horny enough, went to his apartment, they got back together for a while, Barty did something insane, Regulus broke up with him again. He wanted this time to be different. That’s why he left his flat. He didn’t stay the night. He always stayed the night.
Sirius had told him time and time again to be done with the man. To block him and never look back. Find someone else who made him laugh and didn’t make him cry. Regulus wanted to. He really wanted to. It was just harder than he thought it would be.
The car stopped in front of the flat. Regulus knew his brother was inside, he would still be awake. Regulus took off his seatbelt and moved to open the door when James caught his wrist. Regulus looked up at him.
“Don’t antagonise him. He had a rough night and from the look of things, “ he gestured at the marks covering his neck and chest, “you did too. Just play nice so we can all go to bed.” Regulus held eye contact for a moment before he nodded once. He climbed out of the car and made his way to the door. He took a deep breath to steel himself against what he was going to find inside before pushing the door open.
Before he had properly passed over the threshold, Sirius was holding his face in his hands and frantically checking him for bruises.
“Sirius stop, you know Barty doesn’t hit me.” Sirius scowled and kept looking at him as though something would magically pop up.
“Just because he hasn't doesn’t mean he never will. If he ever makes that mistake, I’m going to kill him.” Sirius seemed satisfied with his search when his eyes dropped to Regulus’ neck “I might kill him anyway.” Regulus rolled his eyes.
“I don’t have any marks I didn’t want.” His brother made a sound in the back of his throat that Regulus chose not to decipher. Remus came out of the kitchen and looked at him. There was disappointment in his eyes. Regulus looked away. Remus was the one he cared the most about not disappointing. He had a calm, kind demeanour that Regulus had come to rely on. He hated to think that Remus was upset with what he was doing.
Sirius always seemed to be upset with Regulus for some reason or other. He didn’t always show it, but he knew his brother was disappointed he waited so long to get out of that house. He didn’t like that he slept around. He wanted him to have more hobbies. Regulus got it, and he was grateful that Sirius cared enough to want those things for him, but it drove Regulus mad.
Then there’s James. James fucking Potter. Enough said.
“I’m tired, Sirius. Can we talk about it in the morning? I promise, I’ll actually talk about it.” His brother looked conflicted. He looked at Remus and James, trying to decide what to do. Finally, he nodded and hugged Regulus.
“I was really worried. And I’m pissed at you. I’m glad you’re okay though.” Regulus sighed into the hug and buried his nose into his brother's neck. He would agree to go to whatever class he asked him to go to next time to make it up to him. They let go at the same time and Regulus smiled at Remus before going to his room. He needed a shower. He sighed one more time before opening his door to go shower. James was standing there, fist raised to knock.
“Oh, hi.” He looked at his hand, still in the air and dropped it, “I just wanted to say thank you. For not being an asshole. Well, more of an asshole.” Regulus stared at him blankly. He didn’t know why James was at his door. They weren’t friends and James made it very clear that he was mad at Regulus in the car. He didn’t have anything to thank him for. Regulus would have done the same thing even if James hadn't asked him to. James began to fidget when Regulus’ silence drew on. Soon enough he realised Regulus wasn’t going to respond and walked away after muttering a soft ‘good night’.
Regulus watched him shuffle into his own room, disappearing from sight. He decided showering could wait until the morning and shut his door, shoving his clothes into his hamper he passed out in seconds flat.
The next morning Regulus dragged himself out of bed to face his brother. He knew he couldn’t avoid the conversation. The only reason he got out of it the night before was because he promised to deal with it in the morning. He decided he would shower first.
He gathered his towel and a change of clothes and walked across the hall to the bathroom. Not bothering to knock, he walked in just in time to see James stepping out of the shower. Stark naked and dripping wet. He froze. His eyes widened as he took in the other man. He begged his body to leave the room or at least look away. James looked up and his eyes grew when he realised someone was in the bathroom, then they grew more when he realised who it was. Regulus watched a drop of water trail down his collar bone.
“Oh fuck!” James shouted out as he grabbed for his towel then slipped on a bit of water he dripped onto the floor. He landed hard on his knees and stared up at Regulus.
“James? You okay?” Regulus heard his brother ask.
“Yeah, just slipped getting out of the shower.” James shouted back.
“You sure?” Sirius’ voice was closer. Regulus heard the door open behind him and could do nothing to stop what he knew would be a disaster. “Oh, fuck no.” Before he could respond, Regulus was being pulled out of the bathroom and the door was slammed shut.
“Um,” was all he could muster before Sirius was interrupting him.
“What the fuck? What did I just walk into?” Regulus scowled.
“Your best friend forgot to lock the door. That wasn’t my fault.” Sirius mimicked his expression.
“My best friend was butt ass naked, on his knees, in front of my brother, in the bathroom. What do you expect me to think?” Regulus rolled his eyes. It was too early for this. He already had to deal with yet another conversation about Barty, he didn’t want to deal with one about James.
“Oh please. As if I wanted that to happen. He forgot to lock the door, I went in for a shower, and he slipped trying to get his towel. It was perfectly innocent. James is just an idiot.”
“Hey!” James protested as he opened the door, blessedly wrapped in the towel he fell trying to reach. “I may have forgotten to lock the door, but it’s not like you were doing anything to stop looking. You were just standing there.”
Regulus felt his face flush, he told himself it was in anger, “As if I wanted to see any of that. I was much happier before I was subjected to having the image of your dick flopping around. That’s gonna be burned into my retinas forever. I deserve compensation.” James and Sirius rolled their eyes in unison.
“You could have left as soon as you realised the bathroom was occupied.” James said.
“You could have knocked. Everyone knows James never locks the door.” Sirius added.
“Which is another problem. James should lock the door.” They both began to protest at the same time. Bullshit about ‘James lived here first, blah, blah, blah. He has ADHD, blah, blah, blah, Who doesn’t forget to lock the door now and then? Blah, blah, blah.’ Regulus tuned them both out and walked into the kitchen where Remus was standing at the stove looking amused.
“You could have stepped in at any time.” He shrugged.
“I didn’t want to. You seem like you handled it.” The others voices began to raise when they realised Regulus was no longer in the hall with them. He raised an eyebrow at Remus.
“There’s no such thing as ‘handling it’ when it comes to those idiots.” Remus snorted, but chose to stay silent as his boyfriend and best friend came barreling in to continue their tirade, James had chosen to get dressed at some point.
“Okay, I get it. I’ll knock before going into the bathroom. I don’t care about this problem enough to make it a problem.” Sirius nodded triumphantly, seeming satisfied. James eyed Regulus as though he didn’t believe he would drop it that quickly. Normally, Regulus wouldn’t, but he didn’t have the bandwidth to deal with such an innocuous situation when he knew he still had to have the ‘Barty talk’ with his brother.
Speaking of, Sirius glanced at him warily before speaking, “So, last night.” Regulus nodded. He had been expecting it, he had just really wanted a shower beforehand. At least Remus had made pancakes.
“Last night.” The brothers stared at each other, both waiting for the other to break first. Regulus never broke first. Sirius let out a sigh, he looked very tired suddenly.
“I just need to know where you are. If you’re going to make stupid decisions, I need to know I can pick you up when you need me.”
Regulus scoffed, “I can call you just fine when I need you.” The memory of sitting in the library, clothes soaking wet from the rain the night his parents kicked him out flashed through his mind. It had taken him nearly 12 hours to call Sirius. His brother had gotten there is less than one. Sirius was always there when he needed him, whether he wanted him to be or not. There was a part of Regulus that was grateful for the assurance that his brother wouldn’t be leaving him again, but once was enough to never be certain in his own mind.
“You broke up with Barty over a year ago and you keep going over there. You’ve never called me to pick you up. And the pubs you go to are really seedy” Regulus scoffed again. “Not to mention the clubs you choose. I don’t trust the guys there to be respectful of you.” Something warm grew in his chest. He wanted to rip it out with his bare hands. They all knew what Sirius meant when he talked about respect. It was true that he had some bad experiences when he first started going out, but he quickly learned which guys to steer clear of. He had called Sirius then.
“You showed me most of the places I go to.”
“Yeah, which is how I know they’re seedy.” James let out a small chuckle from where he was sitting across from Regulus. Regulus glared at him. He responded by giving an over dramatic wink. “Look, all I want is for you to be safe. I don’t think that I can keep going as we have been. Which is why I think you should join our Life 360.” Regulus gaped at him. The entire reason he ended things with Barty was because he put a tracker on his phone. Well, not the entire reason, but that was the one that made Regulus realise he was insane. He couldn’t believe his brother was genuinely offering that as a solution. He looked at Remus for support, but only saw some for Sirius.
He spoke for the first time during the exchange, “I think it’s a good idea, Regulus. We all get worried about you and you’re not the best at answering your phone. This is the best way to make sure we all know where you are if you need one of us, and you can know where we are too. James will text me his order when I’m next to some fast food spot and Sirius will call me when I’m passing the shops and he needs milk or something. It doesn’t need to be used in a negative way. We’re not going to stop you from going places or seeing anyone.” He shot a sharp look at Sirius. “We just want to know where you are if you need any of us.”
“I don’t want to control you, Reggie. I want to keep you safe in any way you’ll let me, if all you’ll let me do is text and call you a hundred times a night, then I’ll do it. But this is a way to see where you are. We can come up with some kind of code that you can text if you need help and whoever is closest and available will get you.” Regulus had to admit, their arguments were swaying him. The idea horrified him at first, but they weren’t wrong that this could help with not getting so many messages if they were worried. It would alleviate their anxiety and his frustrations.
“Plus,” James added, “being able to see where everyone is during the day is super fun. I’ll get on there when I miss them and just see what they're doing. I won’t text them or anything, I just watch them.” Regulus made a face.
“That’s creepy as hell. You just watch them?”
“Well, their icons. It’s not like footage, or anything. It’s like a map with little profile pictures of them. And we can add location names. So, the flat is labelled home and each of our jobs are labelled. That way it isn’t some random address that we have to kind of figure out.”
Regulus considered it for a moment, “Is there any way to turn it off for a while? If I don’t want you to know where I am, what then?” James and Sirius hesitated. Remus answered for them.
“If you turn on battery saver mode on your phone, your location goes off. But if you turn your location off, we have free reign to text you as much as we want to make sure you’re safe.”
Regulus looked at him closely, “Fine, but if my location is on, you all get one text and call. Each.”
“That only works if you respond to the text.” Remus shot back.
“Deal.” Regulus looked at Sirius, who looked happier than he should have after getting his brother on his weird culty, stalker app. James looked smug. Regulus didn’t bother reading into that. James usually looked smug and it had never once been a valid reaction.
They spent the next little bit downloading the app and setting up a profile for Regulus before adding him to the household. They chose for their code to be ‘don’t forget to buy milk’. They figured if they actually needed milk, they could specify. By then, Remus and James had to go to work. James worked online, so he went to his room. Remus kissed Sirius goodbye and waved to Regulus before leaving.
Regulus had to admit, the app didn’t bother him as much as he thought it would. He watched Remus’ icon leave the house and travel to work. It even showed which street he was walking down. Sirius watched him stare at Remus’ profile picture for a while when he decided he was bored and got up to turn on the tv. Regulus went back to his room to read while wondering how quickly it would take to regret his decision.
It turned out to take a very short amount of time. The next day at work, he got a text from James asking him to bring home some food from his job. A couple days after that Sirius asked if he was doing okay after a few hours at his favourite club. It happened like that every couple of days, he would get some kind of text asking if he was okay or to bring something home. He considered deleting that stupid app every time, but then he remembered how much more annoying it was before the app. They all kept their promise to only text once as long as he responded.
Two weeks after downloading the app, he went home with a guy he met at a pub. He heard his phone buzz and apologised as he picked it up to check who was texting him. It was Remus, a simple ‘you okay?’ Regulus shot back a thumbs up and turned to the man.
“Sorry, my brother’s boyfriend.” He leaned in to kiss him again, but a hand on his shoulder stopped him.
“Your brother is gay? And you’re just okay with that?” Disgust dripped from the man’s voice. Regulus stared at him, confused.
“I’m gay. I thought you were gay. If you’re not gay, why am I here?”
“Because you’re not a guy. You said you have a p-”
“Okay, no. Absolutely not. I’m leaving.” Regulus got up to leave when the man grabbed his wrist.
“Hey, I was promised sex. You better deliver.” Regulus felt his heart drop. He fumbled for his phone behind his back and tried to find Remus’ contact and spell milk blind.
“I don’t want to anymore. You can go back to the pub and find someone else. Someone who identifies as a girl.”
“I don’t want someone else. I like ‘em feisty like you.” Regulus punched him in the face. The man let go of his wrist to bring it up to his own nose. “You little bitch, you’re gonna pay for that.” Regulus didn't bother finding out how, he turned on the spot and ran. He booked it down the street until he saw a coffee shop, he checked behind himself but didn’t see the man following him. He walked into the shop and sat down. This was why he went back to Barty so much, why bother finding someone else when so many other people are transphobic. Barty is an asshole about most things, but not that. His thoughts trailed when he heard the bell of the door jingle. He looked up, hoping for Remus. Regulus groaned internally when it turned out to be James. He checked his phone to see if he sent the text to the right person. He had. Why was James here? He hadn’t texted him. His questions would be answered soon, James noticed him and smiled as he took a seat.
“Hey, I saw you were out and went home with someone then suddenly you were here. You’re not normally the type to leave a hookup early, so I figured something must have happened.” He smiled easily. James did everything so easily. Smiling, caring, loving. He gave it all out as though it cost him nothing.
“I’m fine.”
James raised an eyebrow, “Remus also texted me to get you.” Regulus scowled and looked away. “But if you’re fine, I’ll just tell him it was a false alarm and you don’t need a ride home.” James went to stand up.
“Okay! Okay. I’m not fine.” James sat back down.
“What happened?”
“Transphobia.” Regulus spat the word out like poison.
James’ eyes narrowed, “Where is he? I’m gonna kill him.”
“Don’t bother, I already punched him.” Regulus snorted at the shock on James’ face. “What? Didn’t think I had it in me?”
“Oh, I very much believe you have it in you. I just figured you would punch me before some random guy.” Regulus couldn’t help the bubble of laughter that made its way up his throat; James looked smug again. “C’mon, let’s get you home.” They made their way out of the cafe to James’ car. The trip home was quiet. It was a comfortable quiet. Like a soft, warm blanket muffling the rest of the world as you pulled it over your head. Regulus started when he realised Jmaes made him feel safe. He was so used to only being comfortable about Sirius, it was interesting to know that someone else made him feel like that. As he thought about it, Remus made him feel safe too. Somehow in the past couple of years that he had been living with his brother and his idiot friends, he came to like those idiot friends. Remus didn't shock him quite as much as Jsames did. He never thought there would be a day when he felt comfortable and safe around James Potter. Regulus smiled softly to himself when he realised how much he cared about the man sitting next to him, humming along with the radio, offering glances and small smiles like they cost him nothing.
The moment he walked in the door, Sirius accosted him, “Are you okay? Remus told me you sent him the code. James got you? Everything is fine?” Regulus pushed his hands off his face.
“Yes, I’m fine. Just some transphobic dick who didn’t want to take no for an answer.” Sirius’ eyes hardened.
“I’m gonna kill him.”
James snorted, “Don’t bother, our little Reggie here punched him.” He reached out to ruffle Regulus’ curls. Regulus batted his hands away. Sirius grinned widely.
“You punched him? Good on you.” Remus walked in at that point.
“Physical violence isn’t the answer.”
“He was transphobic.”
Remus didn’t miss a beat before saying, “Then physical violence is always the answer.” James and Sirius cackled while Regulus rolled his eyes.
“Whatever, I’m going to bed.” He heard a wave of goodnights as he made his way to his room. He got dressed for the night and eyed his bedside table. He kept a couple of toys in the bottom drawer and was considering pulling one out. He had been denied the sex he had gone out to get after the guy turned out to be a dick. Regulus still wanted something. He shrugged and pulled out one of his toys. It was a long, thick vibrating dildo. He didn’t like the vibration settings on this one, but the stretch was delicious. He picked up some lube as well and shucked off his trousers and pants. Settling back on his pillows, he slicked up a couple fingers to start himself out with.
He groaned at the feeling of being breached. He reached up with his other hand to bite down on. The last thing he needed was his brother barging in on him masterbating because he was being too loud.
He stretched himself out to get ready for the thick toy. After slicking it up, he pressed it in slowly. He savoured each movement of it. His eyes rolled back when it was fully seated. He sat there, breathing for a moment, before pulling it out and pushing it back in. He kept his pace slow for a few minutes, allowing himself time to really feel the toy pressing down on all the right places. After a while, he picked up the pace, shoving the toy in sharply, he held his hand tighter against his mouth to muffle his noises. His wrist twinged in protest, but he ignored it as he pumped the toy faster, harder.
His mind came up with images to push him over the edge faster. A toned stomach. Messy dark hair. Soft hazel eyes. An easy smile. He gasped into his palm as he came. As he breathed deeply, he recognized the images he just came to. James. He just came while thinking about James Potter.
Fuck.
Regulus avoided James as much as he could. He refused to be alone in a room with him. He didn’t know what to do. He masterbated to his brother’s best friend. How did one respond in a situation like this? Regulus didn’t have anyone he could talk to about it. Sirius would freak out. Remus would tell Sirius. He didn’t have any friends.
Regulus hoped it would go away if he ignored it. What ‘it’ was, he didn’t know. All he knew was that he thought of James Potter while he came. He could admit James was attractive. There was nothing stopping him from saying that. Regulus would never say it to James’ face for fear of never hearing the end of it. But he could tell himself. He thought of the day he walked in on James getting out of the shower. He hadn’t been lying when he said it would be burned into his retinas. He just didn’t know how much he would enjoy that fact.
No. He doesn’t enjoy it. He has no reason to. Regulus hasn’t thought about water dripping down James' chest. Or the thick trail of hair leading from his abs down to his- Nope! Not going there. Regulus wasn’t going there. No matter how thick James was. No matter how much the stretch would burn in the best way.
He looked down when he heard something drip onto the table. Oh, god. He was drooling. Regulus was literally drooling, just thinking about James. This was pathetic. He needed to think of something else. He needed to do something else. Someone else. He could call Barty. He always got Regulus’ mind to clear. He could get laid, not think of James, and it would all be fine. Regulus decided to call Barty tonight after his shift.
He ended up getting cut a little early when a party called in to cancel their reservation. Regulus thanked whoever was looking out for him. He had been able to get James out of his mind during the rush, but once it slowed down he was all Regulus could think about. He fished his phone out of his pocket and found Barty’s contact. It connected after the second ring.
“A phone call? Normally, you just show up at my place and demand I take care of you. What have I done to deserve this honour?” Barty drawled through the phone. Regulus could hear his smirk.
“I just wanted to make sure you would be available. I didn’t want to risk you not being there when I showed up.” Regulus tried to keep his voice level.
“And this is after you left without even saying goodbye last time. That hurt my feelings, you know.”
Regulus rolled his eyes, “That would require you to have feelings in the first place. Are you free tonight or not? I could always go to some pub and find someone who is.” He wouldn’t. He hadn’t gone out since the last time, too shaken by what had happened. What could have happened.
Barty tsked, “Baby, you know I get jealous. Of course I’m free for you. Do you want me to come pick you up?” Regulus shuddered at the idea of sitting in Barty’s car.
“No, I can get there myself. I’ll be there in 20.” He hung up before Barty could respond. He put on his headphones and started the walk to Barty’s flat. He ended up making it in 15 minutes.
“Eager are we?” Barty asked when he opened the door. Regulus didn’t respond as he shoved his way past towards the bedroom. He heard the other man chuckle as the door was shut. “C’mon, play nice and I’ll be nice to you.” Barty said as he ran a hand over Regulus’ waist.
“I don’t want you to be nice. I want you to make me forget my name.” Barty’s eyes darkened.
“That, I can do.” He wasted no time turning Regulus around and shoving him onto the bed before following. He popped open the button on Regulus’ trousers and pulled them down with his pants. He gripped each of his thighs and spread his legs wide. Barty grinned up at Regulus sharply before licking a long strip over his hole. Regulus inhaled and reached out to grip the other man’s hair. He threw his head back while Barty sucked his clit and moved one hand from his thigh to breach him.
Barty’s tongue and finger worked him open. Regulus felt that familiar heat curl at the base of his stomach. He used the grip he had on Barty’s hair to get him where he needed him to go. He rocked his hips and used Barty’s face to get closer to the edge. He yelled out as he fell. Barty kept licking and sucking until Regulus pushed him away, the overstimulation too much.
“Shit, baby. I forgot how good you taste.” He licked his lips to emphasise his point. Regulus rolled his eyes when a loud knocking was heard. Barty looked up in irritation. “I wasn’t expecting anyone.” He got up to answer the door, leaving Regulus half dressed on the bed. He stayed there to catch his breath when he heard yelling.
“I know he’s here. Get the fuck out of my way, Crouch.” It was James. Regulus scrambled to find his pants and was just pulling them on when James burst into the room. Barty was right behind him.
“What the fuck are you doing? He came here because he wanted to. He called me. I haven’t forced him to do anything he didn’t practically beg me for.” James looked at Regulus, something like betrayal in his eyes. Regulus didn’t say anything.
“You didn’t answer your phone. That was part of the deal.” He looked down at his trousers on the floor and found his phone in one of the pockets. There were multiple texts from all his roommates. The last one was James saying he was coming to pick him up.
“I didn’t answer because I was busy.” Regulus looked down at himself, gesturing to his state of undress. James looked away.
“Yes, I can see that. If you’ll put your trousers on, we can go.” Barty scoffed from where he was leaning against the doorframe.
“No.”
James raised an eyebrow, “No? What the fuck do you mean ‘no’?” Regulus rolled his eyes, ignoring the heat on his ears at the show of anger.
“I mean,” He spoke slowly to ensure James would understand, “I’m staying here. I haven’t finished and unless Barty kicks me out or I want to leave, I’m staying.”
“I would never kick you out, baby, you know that.” Barty said, sugar lacing his tongue.
James looked affronted, like he hadn’t expected Regulus to stay. It annoyed Regulus. Who was he to have a say in who Regulus saw? Who he fucked? James didn’t own him. He was nothing to the other man. His best friend’s little brother. His roommate. That was it. He couldn’t believe the audacity this man had to assume he knew what was best for Regulus. To decide that it was time for him to leave when he didn’t send the code to say he wanted to.
“In that case, I think it’s time for you to go, James. I have something I want to do,” He looked pointedly at Barty, who waved, “so unless you want to join. Get out.” James’ face grew red. Regulus didn’t know what possessed him to say that. He didn’t want James to join. Did he? No, he didn’t. He didn’t want to share. Who he didn’t want to share, he didn’t know.
“I wouldn’t be opposed to that.” Barty grinned, teeth sharp in the dim lights.
“No. I don’t- that’s not- I mean-”
“Get out, James. I’ll see you at home.” Barty dropped the grin and scowled. James looked at Regulus one last time, hope shone on his face, hope that Regulus would change his mind and leave with him. Regulus stared him down until James dropped his head and turned around.
“Yeah, I’ll see you at home.”
“I trust you can find your way out.” Barty smirked.
James narrowed his eyes, “Yeah, I got it.”
“Good.” James left the room and Barty shut the door with a loud click. He turned on Regulus. “Now, where were we?” Regulus sighed and picked up his trousers.
“Yeah, not happening. My brother’s best friend barging in kind of ruined the mood.” He pulled his trousers on and went to sidestep Barty. He shot out a hand to grab his wrist.
“Hang on a fucking second. You just made a whole show about how you were busy and now you’re not even gonna follow through?”
Regulus ripped his arm back and snapped, “That’s exactly what I’m going to do.”
“Fuck. I knew I was right. The entire time we were together, you insisted there was nothing going on between you and Potter, but I knew better. Have you been fucking him the entire time or is it more recent?” Barty stared expectantly at him.
“What the fuck are you talking about? I never fucked him. Not while we were together and not after.”
Barty scoffed, “Oh please, you’re smarter than that, baby. The man just interrupted us and demanded you go home with him, to what? Watch a movie? He either already fucked you or he wants to.” Regulus felt his face go hot.
“Neither. Are you fucking mental, Barty? It’s not like that. It never has been, never was, never will be.”
“But you want it to be. I can see it on your face. When you were talking to him, you never looked away. And then you asked him to join in? You expect me to just brush over that little fact?”
“You agreed! You know what, I’m not having this conversation. I can’t do this.” Regulus opened the door to the bedroom. “I loved you, you know. Maybe if this wasn’t how you acted when you felt threatened, I still would.” With that, he walked out the door, letting it swing shut behind him. Regulus left the flat and pressed his back against the brick wall. He breathed in deeply and held his breath for a few seconds before letting it out. He opened his eyes when he heard a car honk.
James.
He had stayed. The window was rolled down and James was leaning over the centre console.
“Don’t forget the milk.” He called out the window. Regulus felt something warm crawl its way up his throat. It came out as a burst of watery laughter. His eyes stung as tears gathered.
“I won’t.” He said before walking around the car to open the passenger side door. As soon as he sat down, James had a hand on his arm.
“Are you okay?” His voice was soft.
“Yes. No. I think I’m finally done with Barty.” James sucked in a breath of air.
“That must have been hard for you.”
Regulus scoffed, but it felt weaker than usual, “You hated him from the beginning. You wanted me to dump him from the first time you ever met him.” James took his hand off Regulus’ arm. He immediately missed the warmth. He drove for a few minutes before speaking again.
“I didn’t hate him at first. Well, I did, but not for the reason you think.” He fell quiet, he wasn’t looking at Regulus. No quick glances and easy smiles.
“Why did you hate him?” His voice was quiet, like if he spoke any louder, James wouldn’t tell him.
“Because he wasn’t me. He got to have you and he wasn’t me.” Regulus’ world crashed down. At first, he didn’t understand what James was saying. Of course he wasn’t Barty. He was soft where Barty was rough. Kind where Barty was mean. Offering easy smiles while Barty did nothing but smirk. Then he thought of what Barty had said, ‘he either already fucked you or he wants to.’ Was he right? Did James want him? This entire time? How long had this been going on and Regulus was blissfully unaware? How many times had James picked him up from a hookup and felt the jealousy he had shown today?
“You want me.” It was a question, but Regulus didn’t pose it as one. He already knew. He just wanted to hear it. Wanted to be sure. James let out a miserable laugh. It sounded wrong coming from him.
“From the moment I laid eyes on you.” Regulus felt his head rush. There was no way. The first time they met, Regulus was a mess. Still soaking wet from the rain, eyes red from crying, face bruised from where his mother had slapped him. He had just cut his own hair short. It was choppy and uneven in the worst way. His clothes were baggy and sticking to him in all the wrong spots. He remembered seeing James, that first easy smile. He had taken his bag from Sirius and led him to his new bedroom and told him where the bathroom was so he could shower.
James was the first person he told his name to. James was the first person to call him Regulus. He had never felt safer than that moment when he said his name out loud for the first time and he wasn’t reprimanded or hit, he was offered a towel and a cup of tea when he was ready.
By the time Regulus had gathered his thoughts, James had stopped the car in front of their flat. Before Regulus could talk himself out of it, he took hold of James’ shirt and pressed his lips against the other man’s. He heard James gasp as he grabbed Regulus’ arm to steady himself.
Regulus pushed deeper into the kiss, waiting for James to get with the program. He very quickly did. His hand moved from Regulus' arm to bury itself deep into his curls. James tilted his head slightly to deepen the kiss and ran his tongue along Regulus' bottom lip. He opened his mouth to give access eagerly. They sat there, kissing for seconds, hours, days, until Regulus had to pull back to breathe. He sucked in a breath of air while James watched him. His pupils were blown out in a way that enticed Regulus more than he cared to admit.
“We should head in. Sirius will wonder where we are.” Regulus didn’t want to leave the car, but he knew his brother would freak out if he didn’t go inside soon.
“Yeah, yeah. You’re right. Of course.” James stumbled over his words as his cheeks grew red. Regulus smiled and leaned over to kiss his cheek, lingering longer than strictly necessary.
“You know where I live.” He whispered before opening the car door and stepping out. He heard James mutter a curse before following.
“You’re so lucky your brother is inside or I would take you right here.” James had to lean down to reach Regulus’ ear.
“I would let you.” He looked up in time to see James stop in his tracks, dumbfounded. Regulus was laughing lightly as he opened the door. Sirius wasn’t there as soon as the door opened this time. His laughter died in his throat as he heard the sounds coming from his and Remus’ room. He turned around abruptly, face red, and slammed the door shut.
“Woah, what happened? Are you okay?” Regulus refused to look James in the eye. Staring a point off in the distance instead.
“I think Remus is calming Sirius down.” James looked confused for a moment before a light went off in his eyes. He doubled over laughing.
“It took two years before you heard them together? Oh, man, I’m jealous. Living in the room between the two Black brothers I hear someone having sex every night.” Regulus wrinkled his nose.
“But I don’t bring people here.” James promptly shut up.
“So, we could go back to the car and keep kissing. Or we could brave the flat and hope the sound of the tv covers them.” James ran his hand through his hair nervously. His eyes flicked between Regulus and anywhere else.
“I don’t bring people here, James.”
“I know.”
“So what are you hearing?” Regulus spoke as horror mounted in his chest.
“Oh. You know.” James trailed off.
“No, I don’t. What are you hearing?”
“Okay, it’s not my fault. Your vibrators are really loud and muffling yourself against your hand doesn’t really cover much of the noise. And you don’t even put on music or anything. It’s just you.” James said all of it in a rush, as though getting the words out quickly made them less mortifying.
“Oh my god. You’ve been listening to me masterbate for two years.”
“Not on purpose.” James protested weakly.
“Why didn’t you say anything sooner? I would have turned on music or tried harder to stay quiet.” Regulus felt hysterical. He couldn’t believe it. Oh god. He had come thinking of James. What if he heard that? He hadn't used the vibration settings that night, but if his noises could be heard. Oh god. That was when he noticed James getting redder. He was looking everywhere but Regulus. He was running his fingers through his hair over and over again.
“I just. I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable. You know, you had just moved here. You didn’t really know me. And by the time I thought you did feel comfortable around me, it had been going on for so long that I thought it would be weird.” James tried for an easy smile, but it came out more a grimace. Regulus stared at him.
“You liked it. You liked that you could hear me.” His horror faded away to interest. He watched as James’ eyes widened and he stumbled over his protests. “Come on. I’ll show you what you’ve been hearing.” He didn’t wait for a response as he walked into the flat. He barely stopped himself from covering his ears before he could get to his room and turn on music to drown out the sounds.
Regulus was in the process of taking his shirt off when James walked in. He shut the door quietly and stared at Regulus as he continued to strip. When he was fully naked, James ran his eyes over every inch of skin. Regulus walked up to him and took hold of his hand. He placed it on his waist as an invitation to touch.
James looked like he won the lottery as he ran his fingers lightly over the skin presented to him. He traced each rib, scar, and freckle with reverence. When he got to Regulus’ nipples he pinched them lightly and seemed to suck in the groan Regulus let out. James leaned down to kiss him again. Soft and sweet. When he pulled back, he had an easy smile on.
“You were going to show me something?”
“Yeah. Yes.” Regulus was breathless. He pulled away to open the drawer of his bedside table. He picked up the same toy he had used while coming to thoughts of James and a bottle of lube. James looked at the bottle curiously.
“Do you need that?” He winced at his own words. “I just mean. Don’t you produce…”
“Oh, um. A lot of people do. I’ve never produced a lot naturally and even less once I started hormones. If I don’t use lube it’s really dry, which is more pain than pleasure.” James nodded.
“Yeah, lube then.” Regulus laughed before settling himself on his pillows.
“Are you gonna just stand there or are you gonna join me?” James stared at Regulus before pulling the chair from his desk and sitting down.
“I think I’m gonna enjoy the show.” Regulus sucked in a sharp breath.
He popped the lid of the bottle of lube and poured some onto his fingers. He teased his entrance a bit before slowly breaching. James didn’t look away. His gaze hungry on Regulus. He pumped his finger in and out a couple of times before adding a second. He kept eye contact with James as he moaned softly at the stretch. He kept his pace slow, keeping his eyes on James, who flickered between maintaining eye contact and staring at Regulus’ fingers working him open. He dragged his thumb over his clit and moaned again, rubbing light circles over it. He watched James as a bulge grew in his trousers. James rubbed his palm over it and groaned at the contact.
“Add another one.” He said into the quiet air. Regulus did as he instructed and let his head fall back at the feeling. He sped his pace up a bit, but slowed back down when James clicked his tongue. “I want to see you come on your toy. Keep it slow for now.” Regulus whined as he complied. He kept his fingers moving in and out at a slow, steady pace.
“I’m ready. I can- I can take the toy.” James hummed. Regulus pulled his fingers out and slicked up the toy with shaky hands. “Do you want to tell me how to do it, or do you want me to show you how I usually do it?”
“Show me first. I’ll tell you what I want when I want it.” James said. He unbuckled his belt and popped the button open to pull his cock out. “Toss me the lube.” Regulus reached for the bottle and threw it to him. James caught it easily and spread some on his hand. He gripped his cock and motioned for Regulus to continue.
Regulus picked his toy up and lined it up before slowly pressing it in. His eyes rolled back as he felt it push deeper inside, up against each sweet spot. He pulled it back out and pushed it in again, just as slow. The next time he pulled it out, he shoved it in as hard and fast as he could. He let out a gasp as his eyes rolled back again. He distantly heard James suck in a breath as he set a much quicker pace. The toy reached deeper than his fingers and stretched him better as well.
He brought a hand up to muffle his sounds when he heard James click his tongue again.
“I want to hear you properly. Muffled through your hand and a wall for two years isn’t nearly as good as the real thing.” Regulus felt his skin heat as he brought his hand back down to twist in the sheets. “Slow down again. I want you to feel it. Slow, but deep.” Regulus drew in a shaky breath as he followed the instructions. He pulled it out almost all the way then pressed it in as deep as it could go. He shuddered at the feeling of the toy pushing against his walls, deep inside him. He opened his eyes to see James stroking himself. If his hand weren’t on his dick, his posture was almost casual.
“Please.” He whispered. “Please. I need-” He was cut off by a moan breaking through.
“What do you need? Anything you want.”
“I need- need you. Please. I need you.” Regulus moaned again, louder. He felt a warm hand on his hip.
“I’m here. What do you need from me?”
“Need to come. Please. I need to come.” James smiled at him and stroked his hip.
“Of course. You can come whenever you want.” Regulus whined as he reached for James' other hand.
“Touch me. I need you to touch me. Now. Yesterday. Please.” Regulus gasped out. He guided James hand to his clit. James copied his movements from earlier, rubbing light circles. He leaned down to kiss him. Regulus moaned into the kiss as he came harder than he could remember. His eyes rolled back and all he could see were stars. He came back to himself to James murmuring in his ear and pressing soft kisses into his cheek and jaw. Regulus was breathing heavily as he pulled the toy out of himself with a wince.
“How are you doing?” James asked. Regulus smiled at him.
“I’m doing great. How are you doing?”
“Better than I ever imagined.” His voice was soft and full of warmth. Regulus wanted to curl up inside of it and sleep for eternity. He had something he needed to do first. He pulled James’ hand down as he sat up. James followed, looking confused. Regulus pushed James onto his back on the bed and shuffled down so he was sitting on his legs. James realised what was happening and sat up.
“Reg, you don’t have to.”
“Shut up. I want to.” He looked up at James, daring him to argue. When he saw the conflicted look on his face, he faltered. “Unless, you don’t want me to.”
“What? Of course I want you to. I just don’t want you to feel like you have to.”
“Well, I want to as well. So shut up and lay down.” James did as he was told and ran a hand through Regulus’ curls. Regulus leaned into it for a moment.
He pulled James' trousers down a bit further to give himself better access. He mouthed along the shaft before sucking the tip into his mouth and sucking. James moaned softly. Regulus worked his way down until he was nosing at the hairs at the base then swallowed. He bobbed his head up and down a couple of times before pulling off to take a breath. He stayed in his comfort zone, working the rest with one of his hands, the other trailing down to play with James’ balls. James was breathing heavily, petting Regulus’ hair. On a particularly hard suck, his hand tightened slightly.
Regulus reached up to press down on James’ hand holding him to get him to understand. It took a second, but soon James was holding his hair in a firmer grip and guiding Regulus where he wanted. James’ breathing was becoming more erratic. His hips thrust up and Regulus choked slightly, but he refused to come up. James did it again. And again. And again. He was pushing Regulus down and thrusting up at the same time. Regulus could feel spit running from his mouth and he swallowed again. James cursed and thrust up harder.
“Oh, shit. I’m gonna-” He was cut off by a moan as Regulus’ mouth filled with his come. He swallowed before pulling off to suck in a deep breath. He kept his hand working James’ cock through his orgasm. Splashes of come hit Regulus on his chest and face. James stared at him in wonder. “Fuck, you’re amazing.” Regulus grinned.
“I know.” James let out a slightly hysterical laugh before pulling Regulus in for a kiss.
He pulled away when the door slammed open. Sirius stood at the threshold, horror in his eyes.
“What the fu-” The rest of his sentence was cut off by the door slamming shut. The men heard Remus say ‘not right now’ before they burst into giggles.
“We should probably go out there to explain.” James said when they caught their breath.
“We should probably talk to each other first.”
James looked at him, “It’s pretty easy for me. I’m obsessed with you and want to marry you someday.” Regulus choked.
“Um.” James gave him an easy smile.
“We can start with dating, maybe?”
Regulus relaxed a bit, “Yeah, I would like that.” They looked up when they heard Sirius screaming for them to come out.
“Time to face the music.” James grinned as he held out a hand to Regulus.
“As long as we do it together.” Regulus said as he took it.
“I wouldn’t have it any other way.”