Bejeweled

As soon as Cissy left, Bella laid on her bed and began using her new present. After everything, she absolutely needed a place to vent. She started by introducing herself, sharing her name, and learning the diary’s name was ‘Tom’, and then she really got started. 

Deciding the best place to start was the beginning, she shared first about growing up a member of the Noble and Most Ancient House of Black; all the expectations that had been placed on her shoulders, all the beliefs she’d been raised on. Tom understood completely, not surprising considering it was a Malfoy artifact after all. Then she talked about Prefect rounds with Remus, and how her feelings for him had started to make her question things. He was a half-blood after all--and a werewolf, though she saved that for later in the story. 

Then she talked about Christmas, and what she’d overheard from The Dark Lord. How it made something inside her snap, shoving her fully away from the Pureblood ideology. She talked about her plan to take down her parents, and how successful it had been. The diary cheered her on, impressed by her cunning. It said it was so pleased to be in the hands of such a smart and capable witch, and she shared how pleased she was to have it. Bella poured herself into it; all her ups and downs of her last year at Hogwarts, her hopes, her fears. She spent hours writing in that diary, staying up well past her roommates coming in and closing their bed curtains for the night. 

It was a relief. Vomiting up her heart and finally having space to breathe again. 

Not that she’d been alone before. She was sure Remus or Lily or Andy would have been happy to let her vent and vent and vent to them, but, maybe it was the oldest sister in her, she didn’t want to put it all on their shoulders. Meanwhile, she frankly didn’t give a damn putting so much onto a thinking piece of paper. Its whole purpose in existence was simply to take whatever she had to say, and she planned to get good use out of it. 

The next day she was tired, but felt a lightness that made it worth it. Nothing a cup of coffee with breakfast wouldn’t fix. Sure, maybe she didn’t take the best notes in her classes that day, but she’d be fine. 

Before dinner, she met up with Lily and Severus in an empty classroom they’d decided to commandeer for a study session--no romantic partners allowed. Not that they weren’t allowed to talk about them, because Bella sure had questions. 

“Sirius Black?” she raised her eyebrow at Snape pointedly. 

“Remus Lupin?” Snape raised his eyebrow right back. 

“Don’t turn this around on me. Remus and I have been doing Prefect rounds all year. Just because the rest of the school didn’t see it building doesn’t mean it came out of nowhere. You and Sirius sure did,” Bella retorted. 

“And how would you know? What if we had the same slow build out of sight? Hmm?” he challenged. 

“Because you so didn’t!” Lily laughed. “I would have known about it sooner.” 

Despite her teasing, Severus couldn’t help but look pleased that she was talking to him again. The group outing at The Three Broomsticks had done wonders to smooth the tension between the pair, but it was still new enough that Severus savored every second he was allowed to be in her orbit once more. 

He rolled his eyes, though there was no bite to the motion, and sighed dramatically. “Fien, fine. I’m just as shocked as anyone else, really. It’s…fun though. He’s,” Severus weighed his options before landing on, “witty.” 

“Not bad to look at either,” Lily smirked. 

Severus shook his head. “I can’t believe you’d say that about a Marauder. And not even the one you’re dating!” 

“Honestly. What are we all thinking?” Bella teased with a dramatic sigh. 

All three of them laughed. 

“They may be the Marauders, but we’re the ones who deal with their bullshit,” Lily laughed. 

“‘The Dealers’ sounds like we sell drugs,” Severus shook his head. 

“We’ll workshop it,” Bella shrugged one shoulder. 

“What does Potter think of his best mate seeing me of all people?” Severus asked Lily. 

“Probably the same thing you think of me seeing him. That he can do better,” she answered. 

Severus bit his lower lip slightly, glancing out one of the windows for half a second. “I suppose that’s fair. Having butterbeers with all of them was…odd, to put it mildly.” 

“How do you feel about seeing Sirius?” Lily asked softly. 

Severus fidgeted in his chair, taking a deep breath before answering. “Like I’ve completely lost my mind,” he finally answered in a tone Bella had never heard before. 

Around other Slytherin’s Severus always had his guard up. He was either above you intellectually, talking down to anyone who said something he thought was idiotic, or he was scathingly sarcastic, or he was simply cold and distant. Slytherin's didn’t let their guard down in a snake pit. 

But here it was different. He was with his friend. No, friends plural. He must have trusted Bella some to allow her to witness this moment of vulnerability. Despite her growing list, Bella still treasured each time someone truly let her in. It wasn’t something she ever thought she’d have much of in her life. It had always been her and her sister’s against the world, no one else. Even The Dark Lord, when she was convinced they were in love, didn’t truly open up to her--didn’t even pretend to. But now she didn’t need anyone to pretend to, because she had people who actually did. 

“Oh, you have,” she answered in a matter-of-fact tone, causing both of her friends to turn their attention to her. “Completely lost it. All of us have, really. That’s what fancying someone is.” 

Severus looked amused, but Lily just rolled her eyes. 

~ 

Remus wasn’t sure he’d ever felt so optimistic for the future. Sure, there was still tension. People were afraid of You-Know-Who and the growing political unrest, the war on the horizon. But he knew the movement had been handed a devastating blow at the hands of his very own girlfriend. Not only had You-Know-Who lost the financial support of the Black family, but rumors spreading about their downfall meant many other benefactors had (at least temporarily) suspended their support. 

The war on the horizon looked further away. Like a smaller threat. 

And then there was his personal life. He was in love. And she loved him back. And his friends were happy too! Well, besides Peter, but he would find someone someday. But James finally had Lily, and Sirius had Severus Snape of all people. Sure, they were keeping it quiet because they didn’t care to deal with what people would think of two guys being together, but Sirius still seemed happy, really happy. For the first time Remus could remember, it felt like they had a real future head of them. Not one only marked by war and turmoil, but one that had real joy in it too. Maybe not only joy--of course not only joy, but not only pain either. Things worth fighting for. 

Weeks passed since the whole group had hung out together at The Three Broomsticks, and things were going well. Bella, Lily, and Snape seemed to become their own little trio the same way he, James, Sirius, and Peter were. They even took to calling themselves ‘The Handlers’ the same way they did ‘The Marauders’. 

“Since zoo animals have handlers,” Bella had snickered, explaining it to him. 

He’d rolled his eyes and answered with mock offence. “Oi! We’re not zoo animals!” 

To which he’d gotten an amused smirk that he just had to kiss right off her. 

When he’d first become friends with James, Sirius, and Peter, he’d learned that happiness didn’t mean a lack of difficulties, just that hardship was easier to face when he wasn’t alone. This felt like a reminder of that, an expansion of the people that were with him. And that was how they would face the war when it came, hand in hand. 

The same way he faced his monthly transformations. It was still terrifying, still painful, something he still dreaded, but as Remus walked down the secret tunnel to the shrieking shack, he knew it wouldn’t be so bad because there would be a stag, a dog, and a rat coming to stand with him through it.