Week 5
Aurelia began preparing obsessively for another venture into the Forbidden Forest. She studied ceaselessly in the library, a mountain of open books surrounding her. Titles such as The Complete Guide to Sojourn With Centaurs, The Ins and Outs of Unicorns, The Starry Centaur, Divination Through the Eyes of the Herd, A Wizard’s Guide to Speaking in Riddles, and even Hogwarts A History were often seen cracked open on the worn library tables.
She began to see less of… well, everyone. She had not yet mustered up the courage to invite Regulus to study with her or even be seen with her outside of mealtimes. Regretfully, preparing for Kettleburn’s project ate up much of her spare time—including breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Not that it matters, Aurelia thought pitifully to herself. Regulus barely speaks to me as it is.
It was true. Ever since they discreetly exchanged secrets, Regulus had barely said more than a “good morning” to her, preferring to sit near her quietly. As always, she took these opportunities to study him. He was always princely in manner and character, but Aurelia saw the darkness that lurked behind his polite nature. She saw it in the darkened circles beneath his eyes, the weary tilt to his shoulders, and how he clutched his forearm so tightly she was sure he left fingerprints behind. She wondered if this side of him was something that only she saw. Or perhaps he allowed her to see.
Aurelia decided privately to let the quaffle fall into Regulus’s pitch. It would be his move from here on out. If this limbo of “friends but not friends” was all he wanted from her, Aurelia would do her best to be okay with that. If nothing else, she was glad that he found some sort of comfort in her presence.
Shaking her head free of her thoughts, Aurelia continued to read, skipping over the information she already knew. Everyone knew that centaurs had a human torso with the lower half of a horse.
Although known experts in astronomy and divination, centaurs are historically difficult to speak with due to their proclivity for speaking in riddles. Gleaning knowledge regarding fate becomes particularly challenging, especially when one approaches a centaur in an attempt to change the direction of destiny. Centaurs believe themselves to be messengers of fate, and destiny is not something to be interfered with. With this in mind, the best approach is one of humble acceptance. It doesn’t hurt to have a head for solving riddles, either!
Aurelia shut The Complete Guide to Sojourn with Centaurs. Humble acceptance, is it? She supposed she could work with that. She was glad she pulled the book on speaking in riddles; perhaps she could exercise her brain to prepare for her centaur encounter.
Aurelia stuffed the borrowed books into her bulging bag and made her way to Charms, feeling a little bit of fear for the first time. This class was shared with the Gryffindor boys, who had been tireless in drawing a reaction out of her by calling her a centaur or horse face or neighing in her direction. So far, Aurelia had been able to ignore them successfully, but her patience was wearing thin.
Aurelia entered the Charms classroom and greeted Flitwick before sitting next to a Gryffindor girl, Marlene McKinnon.
She heard the four boys ambling in, taking their seats in the back of the classroom. She cursed herself and felt her hair begin to curl in on itself, her pretty waves becoming a twisty, coily, springy mess. Oh, hair, please calm down, she begged, attempting to stretch out the curls.
“Woah, what just happened to your hair?” Marlene said beside her.
Aurelia stiffened and turned to Marlene. She didn’t seem to be asking maliciously, but Aurelia couldn’t be sure. Aurelia had never exchanged words with Marlene before, so how could she know she would be asking a genuine question? Aurelia brushed the springy curls from her face and tried to think of how best to respond.
Should she even respond? Maybe she should just pretend like she didn’t hear the question. But how could she do that when Marlene was only a few inches away? Aurelia didn’t feel comfortable impersonating a hard-of-hearing person. So now, what to say? Aurelia didn’t know why her hair decided that some days it was straight, other days it was wavy, and some days it was coiled so tight that her long hair became shoulder length. All Aurelia knew was that it just did!
“Oh, it just does that sometimes,” interjected Lily Evans from the pair of desks behind them.
“Huh,” Marlene said, impressed, “is it a spell?”
“Erm, no, I was born like this,” Aurelia whispered, still trying to hide from the boys who had settled in the back of the classroom.
“Wow!” Marlene exclaimed, “I wish my hair could do something like that! Then I wouldn’t bother with spells and potions every morning,”
Aurelia really looked at Marlene. She was a pretty blonde girl with fair skin and a dusting of freckles across her nose. Her lashes were thick and long, and her lips had a natural full pout on them.
“Oh, come on, Marlene,” Black shouted from the back of the classroom, “if you had horse hair like that beast, you might as well gallop into the Forbidden Forest just like her!”
The chatter in the classroom fell silent, heads turning to look at Aurelia to inspect the hair on her head. Aurelia felt tears well up in her eyes before turning back in her chair and facing the front of the room. The students began to murmur quietly amongst themselves, Aurelia picking out small things like “Who is that,” “It does look a bit like hay, doesn’t it,” “Centaur,” “Some Slytherin she is,” and the final nail in the coffin, “I think her name is Aurelia Centore,”
No, no, no! Aurelia agonized to herself.
“Mister Black!” Professor Flitwick yelled, emerging from his office at the front of the classroom.
But Flitwick’s frustration with Black went unnoticed, even as he marched to the back of the room to hand out punishments. Aurelia hid her face in her arms on her desk, trying to block out the noise of all the whispers.
“I will make you squeal like the pig you are!” a voice rang out in the class.
Aurelia looked up in shock, her hair falling limp and straight against her back. It was Silas Mulciber, a twisted look on his face. His wand was drawn and pointed directly at Sirius, and the tip was already glowing viciously purple, matching the bulging vein in Mulciber’s forehead.
Aurelia’s stomach lurched.
It was happening. Twice now, within weeks of each other, Slytherin housemates have come to her defense during class, threatening violence. Aurelia tried not to gag. Why couldn’t Black just keep his gods forsaken mouth shut? A tear fell against Aurelia’s cheek, and she quickly wiped it away.
Sirius immediately raised his wand to Mulciber in answer, his brows downturned, and his jaw clenched. Aurelia would have expected Potter (the Head Boy) to attempt to diffuse the situation, but instead, he stood behind Black with his wand ready. Even from her side of the room, she could hear the growl that rumbled deep within Sirius’s chest and see a crazed, animalistic glint in his eye.
“Expelliarmus!” Flitwick shouted.
All at once, the wands of Black and Mulciber flew out of their hands and into the firm grip of Professor Flitwick.
“Wands drawn in the middle of class? Well, I never! Absolutely ridiculous and dangerous behavior! Fifty points each for attempting to duel and an extra ten from you, Mr. Black,”
“What?” Sirius objected, “Just from me?”
“I think that the class will agree with me that your language when addressing a classmate was most inappropriate,” Flitwick said with finality and addressed the entire class: “So many of you often forget that soon you will be alumni in a world where the future is uncertain. The time to learn is now. Your lesson is this: grow up!”
Aurelia couldn’t help but blink back some surprise–she didn’t know Flitwick had it in him! Flitwick even ended up handing out detentions in addition to the points. She knew that wouldn’t stop Black. Having Mulciber and Snape come to her defense within a month of each other would only add kindling to an already roaring fire. She was not looking forward to the next time they came to blows before her.
She looked over at Mulciber now, who was already staring at her. When their eyes met, he gave her the smallest nod before returning to his seat.
That night, when Aurelia was finally in the safety of her own common room, Regulus was already sitting in their pair of armchairs silently. She approached him sullenly, exhausted from carrying the borrowed books from the library.
When she sat across from him, he said nothing. His head was tilted back, resting on the chair’s high back. His breathing was even. Perhaps he had fallen asleep. Even in his sleep, he still looked like the perfect prince. Her gaze roved over him and settled on the black cat that was once again sprawled over his lap, purring loudly. Regulus’s hand was idly scratching Dolce’s neck. Ah, so he’s awake.
Aurelia smiled to herself before settling in her assigned seat.
“You know,” she whispered, “if he’s bothering you, please let me know, and I can take care of it,”
Regulus opened his eyes, clearly unsurprised to see her across from him. He appeared to be digesting her words slowly. He cocked his head at her, scanning her from the top of her head to the boots on her feet. He frowned, and Aurelia felt her face become hot.
“Aurelia, I could say the same to you,” he said, his voice raspy with sleep.
Aurelia looked away. So, he knew, Aurelia thought ruefully to herself. So embarrassing!
Sometime in the last few weeks, Regulus must’ve been informed about his brother bullying her by Snape or Mulciber. She knew she had been relatively absent lately, caught up with studying centaurs, so the “how” was clear. But the question was, why? Unless…
Aurelia peeked out from behind her chair and saw them sitting around the main fireplace on the leather couch, heads bowed close together as if sharing secrets. It was Mulciber, Snape, Avery, and Pucey. Even Aster Parkinson, her own roommate, was sitting amongst them, draped like a cloak behind Mulciber. She accidentally caught Snape’s eye, who nodded at her and returned to his hushed discussion.
She looked back at Regulus with her eyes wide. His eyes had shut again. She realized at that moment that she didn’t know anything about Regulus at all.
Aurelia felt rattled and a little bit stupid. She thought that she and Regulus had a certain understanding of each other. Both of them acknowledged that they did not align with the blood purity rhetoric that was percolating the current culture. Aurelia assumed Regulus’s recent discomfort had to do with pressures from his traditionalist pureblood family. She supposed she knew better than most that keeping up appearances was vital when one up and decides to become a blood traitor.
But… was he keeping up appearances? Or was he an active participant in their evil extracurriculars? Did Mulciber and Snape simply observe them together and make their own determinations? Or did Regulus actually speak to them about her, asking them to look out for her? So many questions and not enough answers. She looked at Regulus again, but he was already watching her with a softened look in his eye.
“Why didn’t you say anything?” he asked her quietly.
She blinked, wishing her cat didn’t favor him so much so she’d have something to do with her sweaty hands. Why didn’t she say anything? She supposed there were a few reasons, none of which she felt she could actually voice aloud. She didn’t think she could say anything, really. She didn’t want to be the cause of any conflict. She didn’t think her rapport with Regulus was friendly or trustworthy enough to bring it up to him. She also just… didn’t care until today, when people finally started to notice. The only thing she regrets is that it almost led to open violence.
Instead of saying any of this or confessing more of her deepest vulnerabilities, Aurelia settled on the one thing that seemed true. Something that warmed her from the inside out.
“I didn’t have to, did I?” she said simply.
That weekend at breakfast, Kettleburn approached Aurelia to tell her that the best time to make their trip would be during the next full moon. Apparently, Dumbledore assured him that it should be perfectly safe.
“Besides!” Kettleburn had said, “Between the two of us, formidable and clever, we’d be able to battle a werewolf with no problem!”
With special permission from the Headmaster, Aurelia was filled with a newfound energy. She bade Regulus a quiet farewell and made her way to the library. Aurelia had spent much of her free time practicing brain teasers and various riddles to prepare her for whatever the centaurs might throw their way. It was much harder than she thought; she had no idea how the Ravenclaws did it every time they returned to their common room.
The library was surprisingly full that morning, students attempting to finish most of their work before the following weekend: the first Hogsmeade weekend of term. Aurelia weaved in and out of the shelves of books, looking for a free table to set up shop. Most of the seats were taken, barring only one.
The boy next to the open chair was facing away from her. His hair was a sandy blonde, and he appeared to be a bit tall; his legs were clearly cramped under the library table. He was diligently scribbling on some parchment, frequently referencing an open tome.
Well, this would have to do.
Aurelia mustered up what little courage she seemed to have these days and cleared her throat.
The boy startled and turned to look at her, his eyes wide.
Oh, Aurelia thought, it’s Lupin.
He blinked at her dumbly but said nothing. He inspected her from head to toe but said nothing. He blushed but said nothing. Aurelia took another perusal of the library: no other Gryffindor goons nor seventh-year Slytherins in sight.
”Er, this is the only open seat left,” she said lamely, gesturing to the chair beside him.
He said nothing but began adjusting his materials to make room. Aurelia accepted this invitation and started unloading her books, parchment, ink, and a fresh quill.
As she began working, reading, and rereading all of her research, she felt him staring a hole in the side of her head. When she looked at him to meet his eye, he quickly glanced away, both of their cheeks reddening.
Aurelia made notes all over her research, her eyes scanning the feedback from Kettleburn. He agreed the route they took last year would be best, near Hagrid’s hut. The paths there were a bit more well-trodden. Hopefully, Aurelia could see at least one unicorn this way.
The problem became clear when researching the centaur colony’s whereabouts in particular. Unfortunately, Hogwarts A History did not include as much information on the Forbidden Forest as she hoped it would. Nor was there much information on the local centaur colony. Kettleburn said it had been many years since contact with the centaurs had occurred. Who knew how deep into the forest they were?
Aurelia was disappointed. Centaurs were beautiful and valuable beings with their own culture and hierarchical system. To have so little documentation on the local colony was a shame.
The centaurs were also prideful creatures, making them fickle to normal wizarding ways of communication. Anything that could be perceived as servitude to wizards was highly offensive to them. An invitation to treat sent by an owl may not be received well. As a result, Kettleburn and Aurelia agreed that an organic “chance” meeting would be best. Kettleburn said it might take more than one attempt. Not only that, Kettleburn noted that the best time to go would be the night of a full moon. Aurelia tried to think. When was the next full moon again…?
She glanced at Lupin, who had returned to his own work. He really was quite handsome. He had a strong jaw and a few scars across his face. His shoulders were broad if a bit hunched. Maybe he felt as shy and unsure as she did. His arms were long and strong, and his hands were slender against the pages of his textbook. Aurelia bit her lip.
She wondered absently if perhaps Lupin knew. Would it be wise to ask? Would he report back to Black that she tried talking to him? Would Lupin just openly laugh in her face? She was in the library; perhaps she could simply ask the librarian. Although, the last time she tried to ask Madam Pince anything, she had told Aurelia rather haughtily, “This is a library! Look it up!”
She decided to take a chance, and her desire to progress on this special project won out. He was a prefect; she doubted he’d risk bullying her like his friends did.
“Remus Lupin,” she said.
He startled (again) and looked at her blankly. He said nothing.
Was… that not his name? Aurelia thought to herself, trying to hide her blush by resting her cheek in her palm.
“It is Lupin, right?” she asked.
He nodded but said nothing.
“Do you know when the next full moon is?” Aurelia asked.
His face paled, but his eyes narrowed. She raised a brow. Perhaps that’s his thinking face? Aurelia thought. Oh dear, maybe he was just like his bullying friends after all. He was probably thinking of the best way to insult or compare her to a horse or magical beast.
Resigned, Aurelia muttered, “Never mind,” and began aggressively collecting her belongings. Aurelia flushed and felt her bottom lip tremble. The faster she was out of there, the sooner she’d avoid hearing another childish insult. She should just ask Kettleburn; hopefully, she will see him before Monday.
A hand suddenly gripped her wrist, stopping her from rushing off. Lupin had grabbed her. He held up a single finger in front of him with his free hand. His eyes were pleading. His cheeks were red. Wait, he seemed to say.
“Okay,” she said, and he said nothing.
He released her gently. He ripped a corner off his roll of parchment and scribbled something down before handing it to her.
Three weeks. October 31st. Why?
He watched her eagerly. Why? Aurelia blushed under his study. What could she possibly say? Not even Regulus knew about her upcoming project with Kettleburn. It wasn’t a secret, but Aurelia felt very shy. If Regulus didn’t know, she probably shouldn’t be telling anyone else yet, right? Ugh, Regulus probably didn’t deserve the priority she gave him with all the secrets he kept close to his chest.
And why wouldn’t Lupin say anything? Why was he talking to her through a small note? She didn’t owe Lupin an answer, did she? She supposed he did let her sit with him…
“Just… confirming something,” she said vaguely, watching him.
His flush quickly faded, his skin becoming pale and drawn. He blinked rapidly. His hands clutched his seat with white knuckles.
“Thank you for your time,” she said sincerely, bowing her head to him slightly.
She did not wait for an answer. She knew he would not say anything.
She turned on her heel, dropped off her books at the circulation desk, and left the library.
Remus watched her go. Once she cleared the library threshold, he scrambled with his belongings, stuffing it all haphazardly into his bag.
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!!! Remus chanted to himself. She knows, she knows, she knows, she knows!!!!
As he rushed his way to the door, he paused. Her books that she had returned were still resting on Madam Prince’s desk. Was that… Divination Through the Eyes of the Herd? There was artwork of a centaur on the hardcover. What on earth? He shuffled through the hefty stack. More books on centaurs, unicorns, and Hogwarts: A History…
Remus was stumped. None of the reading material she was working on alluded to any knowledge of his furry little problem. But she was shy and flighty and left right when she got her answer.
“Just… confirming something,” she had said.
It could mean nothing else, especially since Snape already knew. Gods, Dumbledore should’ve just obliviated him! If Snape knew, then the whole of Slytherin House could possibly know. Snape wasn’t dumb enough to just announce it; Snape was clever. He probably planted seeds and let people figure it out alone.
In a blind panic, Remus booked it to the quidditch pitch, where he knew Gryffindor was having their first official practice of the season. Surely, James would know what to do. He knew what to do last time, and no one got hurt. None were any the wiser… except for Snape and now except for Aurelia Centore.
Remus burst forth from the main doors of Hogwarts and crossed the courtyard to the pitch. It was a long walk, and it was particularly cold. Remus felt nothing. He felt numb. His secret was out. He was out, and he was done! Gods, how was he going to explain his expulsion to his parents?
His spiraling thoughts came one after another, but one that made him groan aloud had him stopping in his tracks. How was he going to explain this to Sirius? He knew that Sirius would find a way to make it about himself and how Remus somehow betrayed him. He would understand eventually though, right? Remus didn’t actually say anything to her. He only swore not to speak to her. Godric, but Sirius doesn’t care for technicalities, he never has! Maybe he would try to get James alone after practice, and he would let James decide how to handle the situation. Sirius was volatile, but James was best at tempering him.
Remus took a deep breath of chilly October air, and walked on.
In the stands, he found Peter sitting by his lonesome. He was bundled in a woollen cloak, and appeared to be sullen.
“All right, Pete?” Remus said.
Peter cracked a smile for him. “Yeah. I thought you were studying,”
“I was,” Remus said, “I decided to come watch after all.”
“Right,” Peter said, burrowing into the thick fabric of his cloak.
Not knowing what else to say, Remus sat next to Peter and watched his flying friends. James was an expert flyer and this year he would show his strength as Captain and as chaser. James was so good at quidditch that he has played almost every position since he made the team from seeker, to chaser, to keeper. There was never any need for James to be a beater. That position was held by Sirius, who used his bat like an extension of himself.
He watched the team now, practicing formations and drills. James began shouting directions at the team, who lowered to the ground and dismounted their brooms. James flew over to Remus and Peter with a bright smile on his face.
“Moony! We weren’t expecting you to come!” he said happily.
“Something’s come up,” Remus said, a meaningful look in his eye.
James’s expression hardened. He nodded. “Meet us in the Common Room.”
“Right!”
Remus watched as James flew to the bottom of the pitch, catching up with Sirius. James threw his arm around Sirius’s shoulders and drew his ear near. As they walked, they quickened their steps.
“What’s happened, Moony?” Peter said.
“I-I… I think my secret is out,” Remus said sadly.
Sirius couldn’t fucking believe his ears.
“I thought you swore not to speak with her!” Sirius shouted at Remus.
“Mate, quiet down,” James muttered, yanking his arm, “this is serious,”
“I am Sirius!”
“Shut the fuck up Sirius, and listen with your ears,” James said.
But Sirius was listening. In hushed tones, Remus revealed that he exchanged words with the Slytherin princess. During this exchange, she seemed to somehow know about Remus being a werewolf. Sirius warned him. Remus only had himself to blame! This would have been avoided if he stuck to his promise!
“I told you not to talk to her Remus! You swore it!”
“But I didn’t, Sirius! I didn’t say one word!”
“But you did say something didn’t you? You know she’s a snake just like the rest of them. You know she called James ‘Pooter.’ You saw Snape and Mulciber leap to her defense. And somehow you don’t think she’s with them? You have no idea what these people are capable of, Moony, no idea. And you just fucking gave her exactly what she wanted: confirmation.”
Remus hung his head, dejected. The fire from the Gryffindor common room flickered light across his features. Sirius began to feel a bit guilty, but he shoved it down. No. He was right about this, he was certainly justified. Remus had betrayed his promise. Who knows what else he might betray?
“Sirius, so he sent her a note with a date on it. Did you even hear a single thing Remus said? We can’t even be sure his secret is out. We need more information. Remus needs to tell Dumbledore! Perhaps Dumbledore can make it go away,” James said pleadingly.
Telling Dumbledore wasn’t enough. Sirius knew that now. Snape was not to be trusted and neither was Centore. Nothing had happened yet, but Sirius was sure that the baby Death Eaters were biding their time, waiting for a moment to strike. There was no time to waste by collecting more useless information. Remus may have broken a promise, but Sirius would do anything for one of his best mates. It was time to put an end to his brother and his stupid girlfriend.
“No,” Sirius said gravely, “I’ll make sure this ends,”