Most evenings, after everyone else had left the common room, Remus could be found studying by the light of the fire. NEWTs were coming up and he was barely sleeping, not eating anywhere near enough and the full moon was the weekend before the exams began. In short, he was straight up not having a good time.
After two weeks of this routine, James, Peter and Sirius decided that something had to be done. James had tried talking to him about the importance of sleep, and Pete had tried bringing him snacks whenever he could, but nothing was working. Sirius decided to take matters into his own hands. Once James and Peter had fallen asleep, he snuck down to the common room.
Remus was hunched over a book, trying to keep his eyes open. He looked up as the bottom stair creaked.
“Alright?” He asked wearily.
“Not really,” Sirius said, sitting at the other end of the sofa.
Remus put his book down and shifted closer to Sirius. “What’s wrong, Pads?”
“I’m worried about my friend.” Sirius whispered, “He’s not looking after himself, and it’s like… living with a ghost.” He met Remus’ eye and said, “Please don’t just fob me off like you did the others.”
Remus’s face softened, “I didn’t mean to worry you.”
“I know.” Sirius brushed his little finger against Remus’ between them on the sofa. “You’re not helping yourself by neglecting yourself. You need to eat, and sleep, and do things that make you happy as well as study. You remember when Evans kept fainting before the OWLs? That’ll be you if you don’t look after yourself, Moons.”
“I can’t fail Pads. I have to get Os or I’ll never—”
“I know. That pressure isn’t helpful. You can only do your best, and how good is your best going to be if you’re sleep-deprived and starving?” He linked their little fingers. “Please look after yourself. Or let us help if it feels difficult. We love you so much.”
“I love you too,” Remus said sleepily, making Sirius’ heart soar, despite knowing what Remus probably meant.
🌙✨🌙✨🌙
Most evenings after everyone had returned home, Sirius could be found drinking Firewhiskey by the light of the fire. All-out war was on the horizon and he was barely sleeping, not eating anywhere enough and drinking far too much to the point of passing out more often than not. In short, he was straight up not having a good time.
After two weeks of this routine, Remus decided that something had to be done. Kingsley had tried talking to Sirius about sleeping better, Molly Weasley had done her best to feed him, but nothing was working. Remus decided to take matters into his own hands. Once the last of the Order had left Grimmauld Place he slunk into the drawing room.
Sirius was hunched over a large glass of firewhiskey, swaying slightly and muttering to himself. He looked up as Remus cleared his throat.
“Alright, Remus?” He asked.
“Not really,” Remus said, sitting down next to Sirius. He held out his hand, smiling softly as Sirius set down his glass and laced his fingers between Remus’.
“What’s wrong?”
“I’m worried about my friend.” Remus said, “He’s not looking after himself, and it’s like spending time with a ghost. I don’t know where you’ve gone, Pads.”
“I'm right here, Moony. You don’t need to worry about me.”
“But I do. Do you remember right before NEWTs when you came down to me in the common room one night and talked me into not self-destructing anymore?” Sirius nodded slowly, “This is me repaying the favour. You’re not eating, I know you’re not sleeping and you’ve gone through four bottles of Firewhiskey so far this week.”
“What else is there to do?” Sirius’ voice trembled slightly,
“So much, love,” Remus said, Sirius’ head snapping up at the use of the name he hadn’t used for over a decade. “Being stuck here is temporary. If you keep on the way you are, you won’t see the day when you can do whatever you want. A very wise man once said to me 'You’re not helping yourself by neglecting yourself’.”
“That does sound like something a very wise man would say.” Sirius smiled slightly, “I think I’m spiralling.”
“How can I help?” He squeezed Sirius’ hand. “What do you need?”
Sirius’ eyes locked on his. “Stay here with me.” He said quietly. “Please.”
“Are you sure?” Remus asked.
“I feel better when you’re here. Like before.” He frowned, “Not that you need to… I don’t mean that you’d need to… with me.”
“Would sharing a bed help you sleep? I know it did in Wales.” Remus asked softly. Sirius nodded, “Alright then. I’ll go and pack up my stuff tomorrow.”
“You don’t have to.”
“I know I don’t. I want to, Pads. I’d do anything for you.” Remus looked away from him. “I love you.”
“Still?” Sirius asked hoarsely.
“Don’t you?” Remus asked, hoping that Sirius wasn’t about to break his heart.
“Of course I do, I just didn’t know where you were at.” Sirius’ eyes shone. “There isn’t a day in the last fifteen years where the thought of you hasn’t helped me survive.”
“Well then,” Remus smiled, “It’s probably time we did something about it, isn’t it?”