Reunited (not quite yet)
New York was interesting to say the least, Montreal more so. Four years in Northern America, moving from city to city and switching teams, the Villeneuve Vultures, the Bluejays, the New York Nifflers. It was a change, a welcome one at the time he had moved away. But after so many years, he had missed the highlands surrounding his family home, the simplicity of merely existing in that vicinity.
Perhaps that was why he had been standing in the overgrown land surrounding the house for over an hour, enveloped by the ever-present lively music loud enough to be heard beyond the walls and throughout the fields, watching everything move around him in the wind as he stood as still as prey waiting to be pounced.
Surely not for a certain blue haired, lanky boy he hadn’t seen for far too long. That was absurd, he wasn’t avoiding Teddy, he hadn’t been. They were both simply far too busy to talk or visit home on holidays; with Teddy set on his path to become a professor straight out of school and quidditch occupying James’ every waking moment and sleeping thought. But at last, after 4 years, James no longer had an excuse for not visiting, with Quidditch out of the picture and no girlfriend whose parents he just had to visit. Not to mention his mum was far too worried to let him skip another Christmas. To quote her on that, ‘it has been too much time since I saw my baby’. She’d lost her baby a long time ago, if he was to be frank.
His mind darted back to the image of a boy he once used to know. He was terrified of meeting him again, more terrified than he was of the ungodly amount of times he would have to explain his ‘crumbled, tumbled and frankly fumbled career’ as Albus had decided to put oh so kindly. All he managed to conjure up in his mind was a blurry face framed by wavy blue hair. He wasn’t even sure if his was still the blue it used to be. He had never quite cared to ask, and Albus never quite cared to inform him. For the better or worse, he knew nothing of Teddy’s new life outside of the things he had heard circulating around Hogwarts the last time he was there, mostly about how incredible he was at his job.
Same old terrifically talented Teddy. “Triple T.” James mumbled, huffing at his own stupid joke.
The air compressed and expanded and swirled and turned as someone apparated close by, the infamous messy black hair associated with the Potters coming into sight. Trust Albus Severus Potter to forever be later than he was.
“Blimey, you look awful. Another shift?”
“Yeah, And you look half dead.”
James scoffed, pulling his hair down into his face. “Well, doesn’t that sound more appealing than whatever this is.”
“You’re making it much harder and scarier than it has to be, James. He’s not going to bite your head off. What shit Image do you have of him?”
***
“I’m going to kill him.”
“Ted-”
“I was fine and then he had to come barging back into my life.” This was his family home, Teddy knew that, he was well aware of that, maybe too aware for his own good, but in his frenzied, anxious state, he simple could not find a fuck in him to give.
“Ted, calm down.”
“I’m calm.” He wasn’t. With hair blazing red, crescent indents on his palms, left behind by his nails, gritted words and the sarcastic way he had dragged out the word calm he was clearly anything but. And Victoire didn’t care to hide that she wasn’t buying his blatant lie as he stared at her.
“I don’t want to see him.” he said at last, shoulders slacking in defeat, plopping down on the plush bed Victoire was sitting on, head held in his hands. He felt his friend pat his hair gently, almost agonisingly so, like he would break under the pressure. He hated that, hated people walking on eggshells all around him, but right now, with James consuming him whole, he didn’t really care. He needed the gentleness, the soft touches to help him forget about James’. Perhaps replace the void he had left, a blackhole looking for any form of affection.
“I know.” Victoire whispered.
“But I miss him.” The words were barely audible, but they both knew what he had said.
“I know, darling.” “I shouldn’t.” “You can. You had something worth missing. The unfortunate end that followed doesn’t make that magically go away.”
But did they? Have something worth missing, ever. Was a friendship so mundane, consisting only of talks about their day to day life and at times, playful banter worth mourning? Was the momentary lust and explosive high of the kiss worth spending years replaying, yearning for? Was there ever even a special bond? Or was it another instance of James choosing a victim for his adventures? Teddy didn’t think he was ever going to find out. James Sirius Potter wasn’t known to be truthful, particularly about his feelings, didn’t matter how much one begged him to be. And trust him, Teddy had tried. Relentlessly.