Potions Class Number 2
Next potions class, Sirius was ready. He was going to win Remus over once and for all.
It couldn’t be that hard. He had pureblood charm on his side, right?
No, that fake shit he’d learned through years of forcing himself to stay out of trouble at his family’s galas was definitely not something he could use on Remus. He had to show him his actual self. How absolutely terrible was that.
Sirius never had good experiences when being himself. It led to- well, he couldn’t think about what would happen at Number 12 Grimmauld’s place now. If the plan went right, he would never have to step a foot back in there again again. Ever.
As he entered the potions room, he made for his seat without hesitation. Lupin- I mean Remus (if his plan was to befriend him, he’d need to accept the fact that Remus had a first name)- wasn’t there yet, but that was fine. None of the marauders were. They’d be a few minutes late as they always were every class after the first class of the year. How Remus managed to be second in class, Sirius would never know.
He tapped the back of his quill on his desk, a bad habit that would most likely get him locked in his room for a week with a piece of bread and a glass of water a day if he was lucky. He was slouching again too, but he was lucky in the fact that all of the other Slytherins were afraid of his power. None would bother him in fear that he would punish them because he had the power to do so. He would never do that, but the others never needed to do that or cared to see that he wouldn’t. He let them think that. It was safer that way, for Regulus and his fourth year friends.
Remus finally entered, actually on time; though, none of the marauders were there yet. Weird. Sirius was so used to them gallivanting about a group, with James strutting at the front like he was one of the muggle fashionistas or whatever they were called.
“Hi,” Remus said to him.
“You’re here on time today,” Sirius said with a blank face. Should he smile? He tried giving one, his face slowly stretching into something that he hoped didn’t make him look constipated or something.
“Jesus Christ, what the heck is that face? And of course I’m on time. I’m always on time,” Remus said, side-eyeing the Black heir.
“No you’re not. You and your whole crew of arseholes are never on time,” he said quietly enough to where only Remus could hear.
“Are you stalking me or something? My whereabouts are none of your business. Anyway, I need you to get up cause you’re blocking my way to my seat,” Remus pointed out. Shit, how could Sirius have been so stupid. He had been calculating every single step he should take and he didn’t even account for the fact that Remus sat against the way and he sat on the outside of him, sandwiching Remus between him and the wall.
Play it off. Play it off. He doesn’t care. He’s not going to hurt you. Calm down, Sirius. Say something snarky, “Uh- Y-yeah, s-sorry about that. I’ll get up.” Sirius said, thankfully not tripping over himself like the pathetic loser he felt he was in that moment. He was blowing this so bad, wasn’t he?
“Just relax, Black. You’re fine. It’s all fine,” Remus said as he sat down. He didn’t offer a smile to Sirius again, but it was definitely better than that strained shit that he got at the beginning of last class. Sirius relaxed for the first time that morning.
Class was fine. It was just review from what they’d learned last year, but it felt a bit less mundane than potions class usually was. Sirius guessed he had Remus to thank for that. He tried to keep his glancing at the boy next to him to a minimum, but he had this funny focused face that Sirius hadn’t noticed before.
His eyebrows were furrowed and his tongue stuck out just slightly. It was kind of cute- wait, cute?? I didn’t just say that. Shut up, brain. Finally, it came time to actually brew a potion. Lupin’s focused face was even more intense, his eyebrows furrowing even further and his tongue sticking out more. Sirius had to hold in a giggle a few times when looking at him.
“Ok, you chop, and I’ll stir the potion. Don’t want you to mess this up, Black.”
Sirius raised an eyebrow at him, “You don’t want me to mess this up? I think you’re forgetting who you’re second to, Remus.”
Remus’s head lifted so fast at that, Sirius was slightly scared he would get whiplash. “Remus, huh? Never thought I would hear the Black heir call halfblood Remus Lupin by his first name.” Remus had a defensive expression on his face. Sirius didn’t like that it was meant for him. He had seen that face a million times before when it was targeted towards the bigoted shits in Slytherin.
“I don’t believe in that stuff, Remus,” Normally, Sirius would have rolled his eyes and not responded, but it seemed important in this moment that he made sure Remus knew he wasn’t like that.
“Yeah? Then why do you never do anything about it?” Remus matched his same intensity.
“I can’t,” The shame Sirius felt pooling in his gut was incomparable to anything he had ever felt before.
“Yes you can, Sirius. Your name holds power over the others. None of them bother you. You could say anything you want, and they would still all fall at your feet.”
“I’m not James, Remus. The most honorable Euphemia and Fleamont Potter are not my parents. I can’t do-”
“Yeah whatever, Sirius. You’re the same person I always thought you were. You’re no different than the other Slytherins. Just get back to chopping.”
Sirius’s heart dropped. He never imagined making friends with Remus to make him question everything he was doing. “No, you’re right Remus,” he mumbled.
“I know I’m right,” Remus said, an actual genuine smile spread across his face, “but I was also out of line. You’re right, too. I don’t know what your life is like, and I never even considered the fact that you have to live with the bigoted shits I’m telling you to defy in your dorm and in your home too.”
“Regulus isn’t a bigoted shit!” Sirius immediately defended.
“No, of course he isn’t. How silly of me,” Remus rolled his eyes, acting as if he was talking to a small child who didn’t understand the world half as well as he did. “Your brother and you are a lot different from each other than others think, aren’t you?”
Sirius paused his chopping. “We’re brothers, and we grew up in the same house. We’re similar to each other.”
Remus shook his head, a smile still on his face. “No, Regulus acts out of ambition. He studies so he can get a good career one day. You act out of something else: care for Regulus. You study to ensure Regulus has an easier time. I don’t know what you think you’re protecting Regulus from, but either way, that’s not a very Slytherin trait if I’m Remembering correctly.”
“I think you’re forgetting Slytherin’s are very good friends too, Remus.”
“I know Slytherins are good friends, Sirius, but they also do most things for themselves. You’re not a Slytherin at all. You’re a lion in disguise, and I think you know that too.”
“I don’t know why you’re accusing me of stalking when you seem to know all of these things about me, Remus.”
“You’re not the only observant one, Sirius.”
“Oh, I’m Sirius now, am I?” Sirius’s face lit up at that.
“Took you the second time to notice, Black. Always knew you were a bit slow,” Remus smirked mischievously.
“I- I’m not slow,” Sirius replied, clearly appalled at the fact that Remus could go from such a serious- heh- conversation to jokes so naturally. “And don’t go back to Black so soon. I’d only just got you to call me Sirius.”
“The ‘Sirius’ will come back when you’re done chopping the ingredients correctly for me. Come on, chop-chop!”
Sirius focused on chopping from then on. And he noticed James and Peter looking back at them every few minutes, most likely checking he was going to start hexing Remus or something. Sirius didn’t mind though. He liked that Remus had someone looking out for him. “Your friends don’t seem to like me very much,” Sirius whispered to Remus softly.
Remus chuckled, “They’ve been freaking out ever since they heard our names called as partners last class. I’ve tried to reassure them by telling them you’re not so bad. Apparently, you not knowing what a pencil is added to James’s distress that you might try to do something, even though he too didn’t know what a pencil was til two years ago.”
“Remus, please tell me about that muggle contraption. I must know.”
Remus looked up at him from his stirring, “I'm guessing muggle studies was off the table for you?”
“Yeah, my parents would throw a fit if I ever took that.”
“And what would happen to you if your parents threw a fit,” that’s when Sirius realized Remus knew something about the sacred pureblood families most people brushed off.
“Nothing you need to worry about,” Sirius put on his trained mask that let no emotion show. He didn’t want to have to use it on Remus, but this was a circumstance where it was necessary. Remus saw right through it, and Sirius knew he did.
“Right. Tell you what. Have lunch with us, and I’ll tell you everything you want to know about muggle society, starting with the pencil.”
Sirius knew that even though Remus spoke it as a demand, he wasn’t actually expected to go there, it was a choice. “I’d love to.” It was the first choice he made in a long time with only himself in mind.