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Regulus Black, the perfect child to his notorious family predecessors Wulbuga Black and Orion Black. But people often forget to mention that he’s the younger brother to Sirius black. Everyone knew of his brother of course, Sirius wasn’t the type of person to NOT be seen at any given moment. Even when in trouble he would find a way to make himself seen whereas Regulus always made himself scarce. But he supposes now that that’s why Sirius got into gryffindor and left him behind. The night of Sirius’ sorting Wulbuga held Regulus weeping about how her son had betrayed her, how hurt she was. She had told him about how much better he is then his brother, that he’s the last hope to salvage this noble aristocratic family. And he had believed her. He had held her and promised to be what a black heir should. When Sirius came home for winter break that year, Regulus had ignored him. Regulus had turned the other way, not even bothering to patch him up after punishments. ‘This is what he deserves for betraying us’ he had confidently told himself. And that was what he truely believed. He didn’t care about his older brother anymore. Until he went to Hogwarts himself. When he saw the pure awe of the place he had a sense of understanding. Not in Sirius, but that these people had used glamour to manipulate Sirius away from his Black roots. He decided he would try to help him turn back to them, help him to clear his mind to the right side. But it didn’t work. Regulus made friends in his house, the only house for a Black. slytherin. He tried at every end to get Sirius to come back to his senses. But he never did. For some reason his brother was stuck in his own stubbornness. ‘I’ll just let him go. I can’t fix what was never not broken. He was a defect’ he had thought while walking down the halls of this beautiful castle with his cool friends. He never truly lost the love for his brother as he had deeply convinced himself he had. And the whole world for that matter. But, he did still care for him as he always had. He cared for him As a weeping baby calling for him, as a toddler wanting someone to play with, as a kid needing guidance, as a family member, and as a brother.
Regulus would never admit he cared for Sirius. No way. He’s just the family’s defect. Any care he had for him left when he ran away from his FAMILY. That’s what he would tell anyone who asked. But he’s gotten older, he’s learned, and he’s grown out of the mindset of the Blacks being saints and Sirius being the demon to hurt them. Those punishments aren’t normal. The cruelty isn’t. He’s still mad Sirius left but he doesn’t quite hate him he just wishes he would have said goodbye like Regulus was worth something. But wasting time pondering on what he wishes would have happened won’t do much.
‘I have to go to the bathroom, but that stupid snapes been following me around. I’ll go to the mertle bathroom I guess.’ A 15 year old Regulus thinks while walking in hogwarts halls one winter day. And he does just that, jogging up the stairs. He had heard crying noises before he entered. He thought for a second of what they could be pondering if he should go in. ‘What is it from? It could be a first year being upset, or someone having the best jerk of their life. Or perhaps it’s some bullimic but that isn’t very typical here. I think I’ll take my chances’ he thinks it through then does walk into the bathroom. Of all the things he expected to see this wasn’t one of them. His eyes popped from the back of him head it felt like and he immediately felt tears to his eyes. What he witnessed was far worse than some dude jerking off to muggle porn or something. His older brother, whole body bleeding with a small sharp metal object in his hand unable to even grip it tears pouring openly from his eyes. His torso, his wrists, his arms, his thighs, his legs. All covered in blood. A bottle of pills next to him. ‘What the FUCK??’ Before the Black heir in Regulus could convince him otherwise he lunged to his brother and used a spell to flick the sharp peice of metal across the room. Sirius froze in place unable to even move or understand what was going on. Regulus looked over to the pill bottle quickly to note mentally that only 2 were gone so he was trying to get high, not OD. That was a relief Atleast. “Sirius, Sirius are you with me?” Regulus asked frantically. Sirius nodded slowly before fresh tears started to pour silently. “Ok ok good. Can you tell me what all of this is?” He said cringing at the idea of looking at all the slices to the skin. Sirius shook his head. “Please?” He had to think fast, Sirius never went non-verbal before so it’s probably not that. But there was one case after a ‘punishment’ where Sirius acted younger if that’s the way to put it. Regulus couldn’t put a name on it but he thinks that’s what’s happening now. Age regression, that’s it!! Which means he should treat Sirius like he would one of mother’s guests children. He crouches down on the floor forced to look at his brothers self-inflicted wounds knowing those needs to be hurried up to patch those up. “Okay Sirius, do you want a new hair shampoo? I have a super cool limited edition candy apple scented shampoo” regulus hopes Sirius still likes all that desperately. Sirius’ eyes flashed with a recognition and he nodded. “Okay then I’ll need you to tell me what happened and why you did this ok? Then it’s all yours” he reasoned. “I- I wanted to make my head stop being mean” Sirius pouted in a childish almost voice if it wasn’t for Sirius’ naturally deep voice. “Well buddy that’s no good, why didn’t you come to me? Do you know who I am?” Regulus asked hoping his luck to get through was still working. “Your my brother! But my brother hates me because I’m bad” Sirius said plainly clearly in the mindset of a 6 year old at most. “I am your brother and I don’t hate you. Listen I’ve been a bad brother so I forgot, how old are you Siri?” Let’s just keep this going. “5” he replies plainly and like it’s obvious. “Yeah I remember now sorry” regulus was stuck here. “What was making your head be mean to you? What was it saying?” Is that too much to ask him right now? Maybe but it’s already been spoken. “My friends are mad at me because a smelly boy put me under a spell to not lie and I told a secret like the bad kid I am” Sirius even in his aged down emotionally state seems hurt by this badly. “So you found something sharp and did this?” He nodded agian “and the bottle, what was that for?” “I wanted to not have to think, I heard a pretty girl say there good for that!” Ok so he has to beat some asses later, cool. Selling muggle pills to his brother is a grave offence. “Good job on telling me buddy I’ll give you to shampoo after a nap ok? Let me clean up your ouchies.” He hated kids but his brother was always so strong for him, seeing him like this feels like re learning Sirius as a whole. Sirius handled being bandaged up well and they went to Regulus’ room where Sirius fell asleep.when we woke up Regulus could see in his eyes he wasn’t regressed anymore so better awnsers are possible. “Fuckkkkk” Sirius groaned lowly looking around before laying eyes on his younger brother. Then all the flashbacks of earlier hit him. He regressed infront of Regulus. He’d only ever done that infront of the marudeders, it was his big secret. Regulus has probably already owled the old bitch. But more memory’s hit. He wasn’t just regressed his little brother saw him cutting and popping pills. He threw his arm (which he notes to be bandaged) over his face and groans agian. Regulus popped into frame. “Morning Sirius” Regulus retorted ironically as it was 11pm. “Uh-hey Reggie” The older responed waiting for the bad news of his mother knowing what happened or his brother hating him. “So, you gonna tell me what the fuck all that was? Let’s start with who did you buy muggle pills from?” Regulus saw no point in choosing his words carefully now, and quite frankly Sirius appreciated not being babied any further. “Shit, do we have to do this?” He asked just exhausted. He didn’t want to have this talk with anyone but if he were to it would be James, not his little brother. “Yeah, when I see my older brother in a bathroom crying, cutting himself, taking pills and age regressing in an unsafe environment to do so I’m going to want to have a talk with him about it.” Regulus kept his tone steady, he wasn’t mad AT Sirius he was mad FOR Sirius. “Fuck, okay first I’m so sorry you had to see that regulus. I never wanted you to see your older brother so weak.” Sirius started talking without being sure what to say. Regulus shook his head “nope don’t even give me that shit I do NOT want an apology for seeing you struggling. That’s a siblings job.” And signaled Sirius to continue. “I just-I just fucked up real bad reg. I made some mistakes and they were grave so i lost all my friends and things just fell apart.” He couldn’t tell regulus what he had done of-course, so that made it harder to explain. “Where did you get the pills and for what intention?” That was naturally the next question. Sirius sighed and chose to respond. “I bought them off a hufflepuff girl. She said they make you numb and forget everything which is why I used some.” He felt so guilty telling his brother these things but he was the one who caught him so, he had no choice. “So first stop trying to get high to forget your problems that’s what father does and I know you don’t want to copy him. Second, what did she look like?” Sirius had tears welling in his eyes when he realized he was doing something they’re parents had done and that he doesn’t want to follow there footsteps like that. He wipes his tears and gives reg an explanation on how she looked. Reg noted it away for later, he had some new hexes to try so she’ll be the perfect target. “Okay, how long have you been age regressing?” He chose to avoid the worst question for last. “Uhm 3 years maybe. It used to be around my friends but earlier it was involuntary because of distress or something.” Regulus just shook his head. “I’m just worried about how unsafe that area was to do it. When you regress you’re supposed to have support around you and safety and stuff.” He wasn’t lecturing, more just stating his concerns. Sirius nodded in understanding and they both felt dread for the last topic- the cutting.
Regulus looked in Sirius’ eyes so that Sirius could see the pain in his eyes. “Why? Why I don’t understand. I-I don’t-“ he started sobbing slightly. “I don’t understand why you would do that, why you would slice at your own skin and so deep and so much. What’s so good about hurting yourself?!” The tears stained his face and his voice became strained. Sirius had a look of guilt and agony on his own expression. He pulled his brother closer to him and just held him as he sobbed for him. After a few minutes Regulus dried it up and looked puffy eyed at his brother for a response. Sirius got the point and his chest tightened. “It’s a feeling I pray you never understand Reggie. It’s an overwhelming feeling of the need to find something to aid you. I can’t really explain it but I’m so sorry you had to see my body so fucked up and bloody kiddo” he looked sad and ruffled regulus’ hair a little bit. “Well stop it. I won’t let you anymore. I’ll raid your room to find any more of those muggle metal things and take your wand when you’re not in class. No more got it? And don’t call me kiddo I’m only a year younger then you asshole” Sirius chuckled. “Okay, yeah alright I’ll stop” and regulus sighed with relief. Even if Sirius didn’t mean it, it was reassuring.
Regulus Black hates Sirius black. He thinks he’s scum, he’s dishonorable, he’s a filthy blood traitor and deserves to be punished. That’s how everyone knows their relationship to be, but is it really? How much does regulus black hate his older brother if he would safe his life without thinking, if he would cry for him, if he would be angry for him? He would of course tell you that none of that happened if you asked. He would deny feeling and feelings for the long black haired tall boy that is called his brother. But it’s a secret between only the 2 sons of the main branch of the Black household that none of those words are in the slightest true. Regulus would safe his brothers life at any cost without thinking. When he struggled with food and treated his body terribly, when he refused to eat and made himself puke up all the food that was forced down Sirius was there. Sirius forced him to see what he was doing and how cruel to himself he was being. Sirius pulled him out of his worst spot and regulus would spend his whole life pulling Sirius out of his if the time came. His brother saved him, and he would always aim to save his brother too. But the public doesn’t need to know them. They don’t need to know their relationship, or anything regarding them. But all of hogwarts felt the shift. Nobody dared to mention it but everyone could tell. Sirius subtly making sure his brother didn’t fall back into his disordered habits by watching that table at lunch, regulus looking at his brothers arms to see any indication of fresh cuts. They also hung out now as weird as it sounds. They went up to the astronomy tower every night deciding it was a fitting place becuase of the wordplay with their names. They talked and acted like real brothers for the first time in years. When Sirius started dating James regulus knew before the marauders did. When regulus started dating Barty Crouch Jr Sirius knew before any of the sliytherins. All it took for them to be brothers was one catching the other vulnerable and taking care of him, how simple.
OMG GUYS I SPENT LIKE A WEEK WRITING THIS BC I FORGOT ABOUT IT ik everyone says my writing is rushed so I hope this one isn’t. I’ve forgot to write for a while because I don’t feel like I’m a good writer but a comment on my other black brothers post inspired me to write something else for them so yeah!! I really hope it’s atleast acceptable quality.
As always thank you so much for reading, I appreciate everyone who reads my works and everyone who gives kudos or Comments too. I always get excited when I get a notif someone interacted. You’re all so loved and appreciated. - love yours truly Cyrus 🖤