Goodbye
It had been a week since Hermione moved into the Zabini Estate. Willa was fairing well with some of the changes. While she still didn’t understand where Theo was, she did like spending time with Blaise and Ginny.
Blaise did surprisingly well with kids — not that Hermione had really expected anything less. But for a quiet man, he kept Willa entertained.
Ginny was watching her long enough to let Hermione sneak away to the bookshop for a while. There were so many things that needed to be done before she could possibly consider opening the store.
Her plans for the inventory, transfiguring the shelves, painting the walls, procuring new decorations…the list would continue to grow day by day, despite what Hermione was able to knock off.
Today was painting day four. She hoped that this was the last of it. The buckets of paint, trays, and rollers were scattered across the canvas drop cloth she had procured for the painting process.
All of the walls were painted in a deep shade of blue. She had painstakingly hand-drawn gold stars all over the ceiling. Today, she needed to finish the trim with metallic paint and then maybe she could just vanish all of the extra materials away — never to be seen again.
She cracked a paint can, picked up a brush, and began to finish the trim.
About an hour passed while she listened to the Muggle radio, humming along to tunes that were unfamiliar but easy enough for her to pick up on the melody.
She didn’t hear the creak of the unlocked front door as it swung inward.
“Hermione,” A soft voice called.
She turned, heart racing in her chest. “Shit.” She dropped the paint can on the ground.
Theo, standing in front of her looking worse for wear, vanished the mess. “I probably should have owled, but Malfoy said I could find you working here—,”
She didn’t want to pry…but since when was Theo speaking to Malfoy? “How are you, Teddy?” Hermione asked, voice tender and soft.
“I miss you.” He whispered, swallowing hard. “I miss Willa, too.”
“She misses you, too, Teddy.”
Theo nodded, the jut of his chin flying up and down with alarming speed. He released a deep breath, watching Hermione as she gestured that they take a seat on the stairs that led between the shopping floor and the upstairs office. “I wish that I could explain myself better, Hermione. I know that you deserve that. I wanted nothing more than to be with you for the rest of my life, but I have done some research and realize that isn’t really a possibility right now.”
She watched him as he shut his green eyes tightly. He produced a small square of parchment from the soft jogging bottoms he was wearing. “Read this.”
Hermione nodded.
She opened the letter and read the last words of Philomena Nott, unsure of what really to make of them. She felt a pang for Theo — and then one for Harry. She knew it would break Harry’s heart to realize that his godfather had a son that he had died before he had a chance to meet.
And that brought her in a circle back around to Theo.
Theo never met his real father. Real father. Sirius would have been a wonderful father. Theo probably would have grown up in a much happier house if Nott Senior had not stepped in.
“Teddy,” She said after a moment, “I understand that this is not the news that either of us wanted, but why did you not trust me enough to tell me any of this when you found out?”
Theo was quiet.
“Did you not trust that I would have stayed? Loved you regardless?”
Theo let out a sigh that came from the deepest corners of his lungs, as if he was drowning and spluttering on his own breaths.
Hermione placed a hand gently on his shoulder. “Teddy, I know that it had to be devastating for you to find all of this out and just deal with it on your own,” She pressed a gentle kiss to his cheek. “I know that it must have been terrifying thinking about all that you could lose.”
“—all that I will lose.” He interjected. “I don’t get to keep you, I don’t get to keep the estate. Not that I really want to keep it, anyway. But the Galleons would have been nice.”
Hermione did her best not to roll her eyes as she knew Theo was posturing himself against what he really wanted to say. “You do know that there could be a way to reverse—,”
“There isn’t,” Theo replied. “Not one that would work unless you wanted to kill me and somehow bring me back from beyond the veil. Potter doesn’t still have that resurrection stone, does he?”
Hermione paled. “Are you sure about that?”
“I’ve had some connections in the DoM looking into it for me,” He replied, almost sheepishly. “Minister Weasley was looking into who might have received the other letters. If the information never made it to the ‘Gamot, I might have been able to keep the estate.”
“Are you saying that they are taking the estate away from you?” Hermione asked.
“Well,” Theo clarified, “the vote isn’t for a few weeks.”
“There is a chance that they won’t take that from you,” Hermione felt hopeful. “With Mr. Weasley’s support and the support of any of our friends who have seats on the Wizengamot—,”
“I’m not sure I really want it, anymore,” Theo’s voice was soft. “What’s the point? If they give me the estate, I’ll remove all the curses on the Manor and sell it anyway.”
“It should be yours to do that with,” Hermione agreed. “As for the blood curse—,”
“I won’t take any risks, not around you or Willa. She’s not a pureblood, either, Hermione.”
Her stomach dropped. “But—,”
“I don’t know if it will affect her,” Theo’s voice was stern, which was miles away from the dejected tone he had only a moment ago. “But I won’t take the risk. I am not asking you to take that risk for yourself or your daughter.”
Your daughter. How odd it felt…to hear Theo not claim Willa like she was his own — like he had not been raising her right alongside Hermione.
“Teddy—,”
“Call me Theo,” His voice was hoarse, his hand, which had been sitting on the back of his neck for a long while now, stretched outward. He stood up, dark brown curls flopping lazily into his face. “Hermione, I love you dearly. But for your safety, I am ending things now. I am not asking you to wait for me, hell, I am encouraging you not to wait for me…my mind healer thinks that it would be best for both of us that we have a clean break. Maybe in some years, we can work on being friends again—,”
“You’ve been seeing a mind healer?”
“One of Malfoy’s friends,” Theo admitted. The long lashes that surrounded his eyes fluttered as he brushed back tears. “HJ, I won’t kiss you goodbye, but just know, you are the best thing that has ever happened to me.”
Hermione felt a pang in her chest. She wanted to reach out for him, to kiss him, to properly convey her affections — but instead, her voice broke and her mind failed her. She stayed on the stairs, watching him as he retreated out into the familiar street of Diagon Alley.
She whispered, “Goodbye,” her face landing in her hands as she crumpled inward.