Evan Rosier is a wonderful friend
The next few weeks passed agonizingly slowly. Throughout those weeks, Regulus did his best to avoid James; however, they would occasionally brush past each other in a corridor or lock eyes in the Great Hall. Each brief encounter filled his heart with pain and guilt, each glance shattered his already broken spirit, and each brush of their shoulders in the hallway left him yearning for more, desperately searching for the warmth James Fleamont Potter seemed to exude continuously.
James didn’t appear to be faring any better. Regulus had caught him sobbing into Remus Lupin's arms in a small nook tucked away in the corner of the library after a Potions class. They had been brewing Amortentia, and Regulus dared not think about what he knew for a fact James smelled. Upon learning the reason behind James’ tears, Regulus swore his heart physically shattered right then and there, the crushing weight of his actions splitting it under pressure as disgust flooded his mind. Why, on that night, couldn’t he tell James the truth? Sometimes it felt like his lips were made for nothing but spilling lies. He didn’t know how much longer he could take this. Barty and Evan had caught on that something wasn’t quite right, while Pandora had been sending knowing looks at him ever since she saw him staring at James in the Great Hall with that melancholy glint in his stormy eyes, which hadn’t faded since that day in the Astronomy Tower.
Pathetic. That’s what he was. How dare he have a hard time after being the one to crush James’ dreams? How dare he use the excuse of protecting that bright light shining off of him like the sun, from being extinguished by his wretched family when he had put it out himself anyway?
Regulus fiddled with the delicate silver rings adorning his fingers while indulging in his new favorite activity: stewing in self-pity and sighing exaggeratedly about the nonexistent relationship with James Potter, a situation he knew was no one’s fault but his own.
"Alright, Reggie, that's enough. Spill it," Evan stated, interrupting his— in Regulus' opinion, quite valid—strop while sounding royally pissed off.
Regulus huffed out one last sigh, sitting up from his comfortable spot on the bed. He turned his head slightly to meet Evan's gaze. "As I seem to be reminding you constantly, absolutely nothing is going on, and I am completely fine. So why don’t you fuck off and get back to stuffing your tongue down Barty’s throat or whatever revolting things you two do when you’re alone together?"
"Reg—" Evan began, exasperated, before Regulus cut in.
"No!"
"But Reg, you—"
"Rosier!" Regulus spat with finality, a threat etched into his tone.
"Black!" Evan growled back, matching Regulus' tone perfectly as usual.
Evan had always been good at ignoring his best friend’s hostility and fake threats, refusing to give up on ensuring Regulus was okay. He hadn’t seen Reggie like this since he returned to their dorm in their second year after receiving a nasty howler from his mother, who had screamed at the top of her lungs like a banshee about how much of a disgrace he was and how that 'mentally ill rubbish' he kept spewing was staining the family reputation. She had found out that for a full year, he had been transitioning from Regina to Regulus, and she wasn’t happy about it. The entire Great Hall had heard that howler. Reg disappeared for a few hours afterward and then returned to the dormitory in the dead of night, three hours after curfew, sobbing. It felt wrong; everything about that delicate, pale skin blotched with red splotches and tear stains running down soft cheeks, his eyes bloodshot and glossed over. It wasn’t right for Regulus to look like that, and Evan had vowed never to let him get that upset again. He had failed.
Pulling himself out of the painful memory, Evan locked eyes with Regulus again, his gaze pleading with Reg to open up to him about what was eating away at him so much. A few seconds of deafening silence passed, the tension settling in the room suffocating and thick enough to be cut by a knife. Regulus was the first to break eye contact, bowing his head in resignation before speaking in a hushed tone. "If I tell you, can you promise to keep it a secret Ev?"
As Regulus spoke Evan's gaze softened, his tense jaw going slack whilst he gently took Regulus' hands into his own. Knowing that sometimes when Reggie was in a bad mood he didn't want to be touched, Evan raised an eyebrow as if asking if this was okay. When the touch was met with no resistance, Evan decided to pull him into a tight, comforting embrace and Regulus tucked his head into the crook of his neck, dark curls falling onto his face and brushing gently against Evan's skin. Whilst Regulus breathed in and out, the short exhales tickling his neck Evan took the opportunity to speak. " I promise Reggie, you have my word. No matter what it is you can trust me, I'll try my best to make it better and I swear on my life that I won't breathe a word to a single soul."
"Okay."
"Okay?" Evan repeated, checking that Regulus was fine with telling him his secret.
"Yeah, I need to tell someone something or I'll burst."
"Go on then. What's wrong, I'm all ears?" He encouraged, glad that Regulus was finally opening up.
"It's James." Tears were pricking in Regulus' eyes at the mention of the name.
Taken aback, Evan paused "What? James as in James Potter? As in your annoying brother's annoying best friend James? That James"
Regulus winced at the reminder of James' friendship with his estranged brother and replied unsure, "Um... yeess?"
"What did he do and will I need an alibi?" Came Evan's cold reply.
Face scrunched up, Regulus let out a small giggle at his friend's blatant overprotectiveness and the subtle offer to commit a crime against James Potter if and when it's deemed necessary before saying, "An alibi won't be necessary Ev; while I appreciate the thought it's me who's hurt his feelings, not the other way around."
Listening intently, Evan gestured for Regulus to follow him to the two-seater couch in the cozy corner of their dorm where they then sat down, their laps covered by the fluffy green blanket that Evan had draped over them whilst Reg snuggled up to him seemingly seeking another hug, which Evan gladly provided him. They often did this, cuddled on the couch talking about anything and everything, though usually Barty, Dorcas, and Pandora were present as well.
"I...um...we've been meeting for a while now. At night. In the astronomy tower, just...talking you know? He's a great listener and he's got this nack for appearing out of nowhere to pester me right when I need someone to talk to."
Evan exhaled, taking the new information in whilst attempting to keep control of his facial muscles so as to prevent the confused look he knew was creeping it's way onto his face, though he couldn't say he was surprised at the thought of Reg and James seeking around together. Not after he caught James glaring daggers into the back of Barty’s head when he ran onto the pitch straight after a slytherin quiddich match that Reg had just won to give him a bone crushing hug as well as a small peck to the crown of his head. In hindsight,Regulus' relationship or whatever they were calling it with James had been glaringly obvious.
After having schooled his expression and overcoming his initial and in his opinion quite justified shock, Evan finally replied "Oh yeah? That's great Reg, you deserve someone like that. He seems good for you, I can't see what the problem is."
Relief flashed in his teary eyes as Regulus contemplated his friend's words. "Well.... he sort of ...confessed? Yes he confessed to me and I was so happy about it but..." a choked sob escaped his throat before he could finish the rest of his sentence "Ev. All I could think about was her. Her disappointed face and the curses I know she'd throw at me if she found out that her mentally ill disappointment of a daughter isn't only parading around 'pretending' to be a boy but is also in love with one."
Pure, unadulterated rage burned its way into Evan's heart at the heart wrenching confession. "Well I couldn't give a flying fuck what your moronic cow of a mother would say or think-if she's even capable of that with her single remaining brain cell-"
"Evan" Regulus scolded at the vulgar language.
"No! Regulus Arcturus Black are going to forget about that saggy tit bitch, find James Potter and tell him how you feel this instant or so help me Merlin ill tell him myself. Am I clear?" Evan practically yelled the words.
"But Ev, what if-" Regulus started but was swiftly cut off by his friends seething voice.
"Am. I. Clear?" Evan spat out through gritted teeth.
All fight left him and Regulus' shoulders sagged deciding it was better to just accept defeat and do as Evan said, "Fine, I'll do it tomorrow evening. Happy?"
"Yes actually. Very. Now if you'll excuse me I have to.. how did you put it? Ah. Yes. Stick my tongue down Barty's throat." He grinned getting off the couch and exiting the room, leaving Regulus to stew in their conversation.