sink or swim - r.a.b

𐙚 chap. 9 -- chistmas break pt.1

A few days later, it came time for Christmas break. You were packing the last few necessities you needed for your break, and making some light-hearted banter with the girls. You hadn't told anyone about the fact that you and Regulus had been studying together. The pair of you had become some kind of unofficial 'study-buddies'.

You stuffed your last t-shirt into your trunk, and sighed. It had been a long while since you got to have a break from all of the stress of your schoolwork. You were very excited to sleep in your own room, in your own bed. It wasn't that you didn't adore the dormitory you were provided with at Hogwarts, but you just missed having your own space.

Of course, you wouldn't completely have your own bubble, because Remus and Peter were staying over for the holidays, Sirius would've if his parents would allowed him, but everyone knew that would never be a possibility. James wasn't thrown off his high horse by this, simply telling Sirius that they'd get it to happen next year.

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Trunk held in hand, you walked down the gravel path toward the Hogsmeade Train Station. You shivered from the frost nipping at your features, you attempted to shrink back into your coat, and failed. You groaned internally, and noticed James running up to you from behind. He wrapped his arm around your shoulders.

"Hello my dear sister," He greeted with a mock-innocent tone. "How are you on this fine day?"
"I'm fine, James, how are you?" You asked, lacking interest.
"Very good," He nodded to himself. "see, I heard through the great vine that you are still hanging out with that slimy git, Regulus." You internally groaned.
"Yes, I am, but last time I checked, I'm my own person, Jamie."
"Not the nickname again." He groaned. You smirked at him, and he let go of you. He slipped back to his group of Marauders.

After James departed from you, you hurried up to the girls, greeting them. "Hey, guys."
"Hello," Emi dragged the 'o' out. Pandora waved at you, as she was speaking to her brother.
"Do you have plans for the holidays?" You asked Emi.
"Pshh, no. Actually, I'll probably go visit my brother." You nodded at her in response.

The three of you finished walking to the train platform. Soon after the fact, Pandora departed from you and Emi to go sit with Evan and his group of Slytherins. Said Slytherins did in fact include Regulus. You frowned slightly. You were kind of going to miss the two of you pairing up when you were studying. Thankfully, you and Regulus both worked your arses off to finish your holiday homework before the event even began.

James and his group ran up to you and Emi, to drag you away to their compartment. You sat between the window, and Emi. James sat acrossed from you next to Sirius and Pete. Remus was in the prefect's compartment. You leaned your head against the window, and fell asleep.

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When you awoke, Remus was there, reading his book. You got up, and dragged Emi with you to take a walk. You walked up to the compartment were Pandora was seated in, and knocked on it before opening it. You kicked Evan off the seat beside Pandora, and sat down beside her. You glanced up at Regulus, and looked back to Pandora and Emi as they talked about something you didn't care to grasp.

You were so tired. The reason why, was lost in your mind. You'd slept great only a few hours earlier, yet fatigue plagued you. You stared mindlessly out the train window, the hills of Scotland passing you by. You were pulled out of your thoughts by Emi's voice. "[Y/N], I think we should go back to the boys' compartment before they come looking for us." You agreed, and the pair of you started getting ready to go. Your eyes met Regulus' for a moment, and you left the compartment.

You chased Emi down the train car back to the boys' compartment, laughing on the way. A few compartments down, you stood there for a moment to catch your breath and compose yourselves before you walked in. James perked up at the sound of the door sliding open. He had a few galleons in his hand. He most likely thought you were the trolley lady.

He deflated when he saw you. "Anything from the trolley, dears?" Emi mocked. James rolled his eyes.
"Shuttup," He mumbled, converging his words. You smirked at James' reaction.

Emi led you to go sit back down in your previous spots, and you fell down onto the spot in between her and the window. You pulled your trunk from under the seat, and opened it up to grab a few galleons yourself. You'd assumed the trolley lady had come whilst you were asleep, but you guessed not.

You messily shoved it back under the seat, and slumped back down. Sirius started blabbering to James about how much he was going to miss him. You rolled your eyes, because it was only going to be two weeks. The trolley lady pulled you out of your zoned-out state. You bought a chocolate frog, and picked at it for a while.

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After the lengthy train ride, you stood up on your stiff legs, and lazily picked up your trunk. You clambered out of the carriage, and walked down the length of the train car. Regulus was leaning out of the door to his carriage, seemingly attempting to find a gap in the slow-moving bustle to escape into so he could get off the train. You glanced up at him, and he returned the look. You could've sworn he started to smile, but it could've just been a trick of the light.

You walked along with the line, and eventually got off of the train with James and the boys right behind you. Emi had already separated from the group to look for her parents. You spotted your mum, and ran up to her. James was hot on your tail, and the two of you assaulted her with a hug. Remus and Peter lagged behind the two of you, and greeted your mum.

"Hey, mum." You pulled away.
"Oh, hi [Y/N], hi James. I missed you two." She pulled you back into a hug. James stood in her embrace awkwardly. He was much too tall for your mother's short frame.
"Hey, mum. Missed you too," James responded. Remus mockingly laughed at James' discomfort, and you shot the boy a knowing look.

You turned your gaze away from Remus, and redirected your focus onto Sirius and Regulus. The pair were acting as if they'd been together for the whole year. You internally rolled your eyes, and turned back to your mum. She was telling the group of you to grab onto her arms so she could apparate you back to the manor.

Your hand gripped onto her arm, and she apparated the four of you to your childhood home. You smiled at the sight. Following suite of the boys that surrounded you, you let go of your mother, and took your trunk inside. When you stepped into the welcoming embrace of the Potter Manor, you felt the sense of home you always did when you were there.

Before the boys could beat you to the stairs to block your way, and surely force you to spill the beans about whatever the fuck you and Regulus were. They hadn't brought it up on the train, not wanting to bring it up around Sirius, surely. You didn't even know what you and Regulus were in the first place, so you couldn't even come up with an adequate response.

When you reached the landing, you walked across the hall to your room, and opened the door. You smiled at the familiar surroundings, sure it was cliche, and probably corny. You sat down your trunk, and opened it. You wanted to take as long as you could upstairs to delay the inevitable bombarding you would be harassed with the second you left your room.

After you messily opened your trunk on the wrong side, causing the contents to spill out along the floor. You groaned to yourself, and gathered them up. You then proceeded to pile up your dirty clothes, and tossed them into your hamper. The next thirty minutes were spent doing tedious tasks after you unpacked.

When you were done, you finally accepted your defeat, and made your way downstairs. As you expected, before you could even make it to the kitchen, James found you. You casted the fruit bowl on the table a longing look, and let James drag you off into the sitting room. Remus and Peter were already there, sitting on one of the sofas.

"So, [Y/N].." James started. "I hear you've still been hanging out with Regulus."
"And? You can't dictate who I hang out wi-" You tried to defend.
"After. We told you not to." He interrupted. Remus rolled his eyes, and Peter nodded along. "You know, that could seriously hurt Sirius."
"So don't tell him."
"Keep a secret from my best friend!? I'm appalled, [Y/N], appalled." James put his hand over his heart as if the thought actually hurt him. You sighed in defeat.
"You could always stop being nosy prats," You suggested, starting to get annoyed at the situation. "It's not like you're in charge of my everyday decisions."
"You're my little sister, it's my job to protect you from the evil in this world."
"What are you even talking about at this point? You sound like you're attempting to be a modern-day Shakespeare. I'm done with this." And with that, you stormed off into the kitchen, leaving James standing there in shock, and The other two boys not looking like they cared too much.

When you arrived in the kitchen, your house elf, Happy, was preparing dinner. You politely greeted her, not letting the annoyance that you still felt seep into your voice. You were missing the girls, they didn't even know that you and Regulus even knew each other beyond your 'odd' hate toward him during the beginning of the school year.

Now that you were thinking about it, you really had no idea how you and Regulus had become civil, let alone close. Everyone thought of him as a pomptious brat, not that they were wrong. He certainly was one, on the surface. You bit into the apple that you had picked up from the fruit bowl that was positioned on the table.

You were pulled out of your thoughts by a owl flapping against the kitchen window. You opened it, allowing the graceful creature in. It stuck out its leg, which was adorned with a letter. You untied the scroll of parchment, and went to pet it, and maybe give it a little treat, but it was gone before you stuck your hand up.

Apple discarded, you shut the window, blocking the icy breeze. You looked at the scroll. It was addressed to you, yet you didn't recognize the handwriting. It was slanted like Regulus', but the script lacked the over-dramatic lettering. You looked at the seal, it seemed to be a crest of some sort, with the words 'Toujours Pur' were engraved at the bottom of the wax. French, then.

You broke the seal, and grabbed the piece of parchment that sat snug inside the envelope. On the parchment, was a letter.

Miss [Y/N] Potter,

We kindly extend the invitation to our Christmas ball unto you. We have gotten word that, unlike the rest of your blood-traitor family, you seem to frattanise with the right sort. The dress code is strictly ballroom attire. If you show up in anything else, expect to be turned away.

This event will take place at the Black Manor {12, Grimmauld Place} on December 21st from eight pm to eleven pm.

Toujours Pur,
Wallburga and Orion Black.

What the fuck. It was the first day of Christmas break, and you were getting invites to Christmas Balls. The Black family Christmas Ball. This had to be a joke, I mean the Blacks hated the Potters. They were nothing but blood-traitor scum in their eyes. But then why were you getting invited to their Christmas 'party' of sorts?

You paced around the kitchen for a second, and decided to got to your mother about this. This was insane. The Blacks shouldn't be inviting you of all people. And if you told any of the boys they'd tell you to go, souley to get information on Sirius. You didn't want to be treated as a mole to get information from the inside.

So, as you made your way down the lowest flight of stairs to the library to find your mother, letter clutched in your hand, your mind was racing. When you finally reached the bottom, you walked down the dim hallway. When you reached the end, you opened the door to the library. "Mum?" You called out.

"Over here, dear." She responded, she was sitting on a couch, reading a book.
"Hey, mum."
"Hello dear. Please, sit." She patted the space next to her. You sat down beside her, and started explaining the situation.
"So, mum. I was in the kitchen, getting a little something to eat, and an owl started flapping at the window. I figured it was just a Ministry owl from dad saying that he would be home late." You paused to take a breath. "But it wasn't, and on it's leg was a letter, so I untied it, and it flew off before I could even give it a pet, or feed it a snack. I thought that was weird, but I opened the letter, and look!" You handed her the letter, and let her take a moment to read it.

"Oh, isn't that strange," She looked back up at you. "Who is 'the right sort'?"
"Well, I've been getting along with Sirius' younger brother, Regulus." You started to explain.
"I didn't know Sirius had a younger brother."
"Oh, yeah well he does. Anyways, we aren't that close, we study together sometimes, but that's it. I guess I've also been hanging out with his friend Evan Rosier's little sister, Pandora, and there's Emi. Her family is kind of involved in that stuff." You shrugged. Your mother nodded at you.
"Yes, I guess that makes sense. Well, if you want to go, you can. If you talk to James and the boys about it, I can almost ensure you that they'll want you to go to fetch information on Sirius. But, if you decide you want to go, but don't want them to know, I can always cover for you. You know, Monty will probably want you to get information on their family too. Always been superstitious about them, he has."
"I don't think I want anyone else to know, mum. This is kind of big." She nodded in understanding.
"Then I wont tell anyone, [Y/N]." She enveloped you into a hug.
"Thanks, mom." You sighed out.

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After you'd explained what happened to your mother, and you two talked about it a little more, you decided you were in fact going to go to the Black Manor, and no, you were not going to tell your brother, or father. You made your way back up the stairs, and went up to your room. You weren't really hungry, the chaos of the day absolutely ruined your appetite.

So instead, you walked up into your room, and set the letter in your beside table's drawer. You sighed, and got ready for bed. You thought it was kind of strange that you hadn't seen the boys since earlier when they practically cornered you, but you shrugged it off. When you finished changing into your pajamas, you got into your bed, and fell into a deep slumber.

[A/N]
soo.. this took so long
to write for no reason.
i hope you enjoyed..?