Everything was falling apart. He wanted to tell him that he was doing it for them. That he didn’t have a choice. It was either him or Sirius and he had to keep his promise of protecting Sirius. Of saving him for Remus . He couldn’t back down now.
He had made it into Tom’s inner circle. He was slowly gaining his trust.
He still felt the pain running down his harm. The pain from the mark that was now branded deep into his skin. He didn’t want to fight with Remus. He didn’t wanted it to end so soon. Just when it started. He was the one constant part of hope he had left and it was being destroyed.
He walked toward him slowly. As if he was walking towards a wounded animal. But the reality was Remus was. He had hurt him. He had hurt them.
“Stop. I want you to stay away from me. Stay away from him.” Remus told him with pain and hatred.
Regulus stop. The word was made him stop breathing for a second.
Sirius.
The unsaid name. It always came down to him. He should have known that this would always come down to Sirius. Why would he think it would be any different.
Regulus heart broke. The small part he had left. The part he had given to Remus easily was being destroyed. Tossed away like he was nothing. He thought this would be the same as he always felt. He would be alone again and he would deal with it. But this was a lot worst. Because this was going to be be the last piece of happiness that will be taken away. He doesn’t know if he would have anything left after this. The only thing he has left is the mission now. Once again he was thrown away by someone he cared about. Someone he loved. But he is not going to let himself think of that. He couldn’t now. Maybe after.
“I don’t want you to come near me again. This. What ever this is, was. It’s over. You made your choice. You decided to destroy your brother and us. You choose them. Your perfect pureblood family.”
“I shouldn’t even be surprise. Sirius always said that you never thought about anyone but yourself. You always did what your mother told you. What make this any different. You are just pathetic as the rest of your house.”
Regulus felt like a knife was being punch towards his heart over and over again.
It always comes down to being a Slytherin. They all say that his house was full of prejudice. But in reality everyone else is just the same. How can they break the cycle when everyone was against them.
The boy he love was doing the worst thing that could be done to him. The same thing done over and over to him. He was being silence. He was being spoken to like he was nothing. Destroy was the kind man he had come to know. The beautiful memories he had stored.
Remus just turn to leave the room not wanting to give a chance to Regulus to speak as he was nothing more than a nuisance. But before he left Regulus finally spoke, almost in a whisper.
“Did you even want me or was it always him?” That made Remus stop.
It has been something he had been thinking about before he left. He wondered if Remus really loved him or if he was just a replacement for his brother. A wish he had. Not being able to have Sirius but was left with Regulus instead. Sirius. The brother that he hated and loved. The brother that was able to get what he wanted. Because of his sacrifice, it didn’t matter who was left behind. Because that is who his brother was. It didn’t matter who was hurt in the process at the end. As long as he got his happiness.
Regulus stared at Remus’s back. Hoping. His last hope that Remus would turn at say ‘no’. That it was all real. The little time they had. The touches, the kisses, the hopes they shared. Make him believe that at least he could still believe in hope. But Remus didn’t respond. He didn’t even turn. He left him as he crumble to the floor. In the only place he felt safe. The only place he had left and now that was destroyed.
Remus had destroyed their haven.
He didn’t know how long he was there. He was cold. Cold and broken. This time was different from the other times. This time felt final. No more hope. Maybe this was for the better. All he had left now was his mission. The only reason he continue breathing. Because if he didn’t destroyed Tom all of this was for nothing. He had made a promise to himself. A promise he will not break. It started with him trying to protect Sirius. To allowed him to have the life he wanted. The spear stayed and take his place. But this has become something more. It wasn’t just about Sirius anymore. It was about destroying this monster that found a way to cheat dead.
But for now he just let himself feel. He allowed himself to stay in the cold floor for tonight. Tomorrow he will continue to breath. Continue to Occlumency. Because now he knew he didn’t have anyone that would care if he lived or died. Now he was just a body taking space. A body that hopefully will defeat the Dark Lord.