“Everything has changed”
They had been on the run for a while now. Hiding from the world took a toll on all of them and it seemed that Ron had hit his breaking point. After a long and nasty fight, she watched him exit the tent, yelling back that he was done. She watched from the tent flap as he pouted outside. He suddenly stood up straight before shrugging past her. She watched as he swiftly packed a bag. “Where are you going?” Hermione called out, her question hanging in the air. “Away from here.” He grunted out as he headed toward the door. “Wait Ron don’t leave.” She called out to him but he had clearly already decided. “If you really need me, I’ll be at Shell Cottage, otherwise, don’t bother me.” He said forcefully before barging out of the tent.
Hermione and Harry stood in silence, wondering if what just happened was real. Did Ron really just leave them?
Days passed and Ron didn’t return. Harry and Hermione took turns taking watch and doing research. They eventually moved so as to not stay in one place too long. Hermione has just finished setting up the wards as night falls.
“I’ll take the first watch,” she says. Harry doesn’t argue and gets ready for bed.
As she looks out into the darkness, all that is running through her mind is how lonely she is. She should be thinking about the hunt or worrying about the war but the stab of loneliness pierces her heart. It wasn’t as bad before Ron left, but now, there is one less person to distract her. She stares up at the treetops and imagines the stars above them. She silently wishes she had someone. Someone who cared for her and loved her. Someone she could care for and love.
She knows that wishes rarely come true.
As time went on, things changed.
Their relationship developed the more time they spent alone. They talked more, found light in the darkness that was the hunt, and strategized on how they could work to end this war.
She knows that Harry misses his family and Ron leaving has hurt him a lot. He sometimes just stares out into the distance and talks to himself.
Harry has become touchier since Ron left. Brushing her hair off her shoulder, a gentle hand on her back when he sneaks past her in the tent, and lots of hugs from behind. It’s intimate and Hermione relaxes into it. It feels nice. It feels warm. She is so touch-starved and lonely that every little touch is heaven. Her skin tingles even after he lets go.
But she shouldn’t think this way about her best friend. Her best friend is dating their best friend's sister. She just can’t help it. He is her best friend and she is lonely. But he is also lonely and she tries to remember that. His family is out there waiting for him to come home.
Her loneliness feels like a disease sometimes, eating at her heart until there is nothing left. No love to give to anyone, not even her friends; not even her parents. Ever since she had erased herself from their memories and sent them to Australia, the loneliness has gotten worse. Ron and Harry don’t know and hiding it makes her feel more alone.
But Harry is there. Every single day he is there, with her and supporting her. He feels like the only person that she can lean on.
One night, she and Harry are cleaning up from dinner when he hugs her from behind and she melts into the touch. The touch of someone she is comfortable with. While these hugs have become a regular occasion, what is not regular is Harry turning her around and kissing her. For once, she doesn’t think. She kisses him back eagerly because he wants her. She wants him and he wants her back.
They stumble over to his cot which is truly only made for one but they make it work. She ends up straddling him as he holds her as close to his body as possible. He strips off her shirt before attacking her breasts with his mouth. Kissing every inch he can reach. He quickly gets frustrated by the bra being in the way and struggles to remove it. She giggles a bit while he fiddles with it before unhooking it for him and tossing it somewhere in the tent. He looks up at her with adoration in his eyes. She shucks his shirt off so fast that it gets stuck on his neck and shoulders. He laughs as he peels it off. He flips them so she is under him and she looks down at him as he carefully takes her pants off. Like she is delicate and deserves to be treasured. She feels comfortable and he already knows her so well. He finally gets her pants and underwear off before standing up quickly to take his off.
When he pushes into her, it feels right. Like the sun on your face or a night by the fire. He stares into her eyes as he fucks her and she can see the emotion in them. Her nails rake down his back as he speeds up his thrusts. She feels the buildup and shouts out his name as she cums. He quickly pulls out, biting down on his left fist while pumping his cock with the other. In her post-orgasm haze, she can hear him say something into his fist and it doesn’t sound like her name. He collapses onto the cot, spooning her and pulling her back into his chest.
They lay there for a while basking in each other’s company. Feeling comforted and loved. Living in their little bubble of bliss.
“I think I’m going to propose to Ginny after the war ends,” Harry says casually.
The bubble pops.
Hermione just stares at the other tent wall.
Her brain comes back to her. She is stupid. She made a fool out of herself. He didn’t want her, he wanted someone to fuck. He missed his girlfriend and needed some relief. It didn’t sound like he said her name when he came because he didn’t, he said Ginny’s name, she realizes.
She doesn’t know what to say or do so she lays there, in the arms of her best friend who just used her for a fuck. He used her knowing how much it would hurt her. He knew how lonely she was and used it against her.
After a minute or two, she slides out of his arms, sits up, and puts her head in her hands. “Hermione..” He says softly, reaching out to touch her but she jerks away before his fingertips can brush her arm. She stands up and runs her hands through her hair. What does he want her to say? She just shakes her head as she walks away from him.
“Mione… is this going to change things between us?” He asks hesitantly.
She doesn’t know what to say to him.
She looks up at him, despair and sadness etched into her face. He looks guilty. “Why would you shag me knowing you are in love with Ginny and want to marry her?” She says.
He doesn’t know what to say to her. He just stares at her.
“Why would you hurt me like this and act like you cared for me in that way when you don’t?” She says quietly.
He stays silent.
“Why would you tease me with the possibility of us when you know how much I want someone to be mine?” She whispers.
Harry just looks at her as the tears run down her face.
“Why?” She says, her voice breaking.
They stare at each other in silence. Hermione is breaking inside and Harry is frozen and silent.
She blinks, Not knowing why the universe keeps doing this to her.
She takes a deep breath, collecting herself before saying, “I don’t think things between us will ever be the same.”
Harry opens his mouth before closing it and looking at the floor.
Hermione exits the tent to get some fresh air and breaks down immediately. Harry took advantage of her weakness and now, everything has changed.