Chapter 5
They take four days to drive the rest of the way. It shouldn’t be more than a few hours. A nights drive. By the second day both of them stop pretending they aren’t taking a very long route. James denies it the first time he asks about it, but barely holds back a laugh. Of course he’s not driving directly there. He clocked it much earlier, but didn’t mention it.
With the rouse lifted they make a game of it. There’s no rush to get to Scotland when they have each other and they actually want to be in the other’s company. James started to ask him which way they should turn whenever they would get to a traffic signal. Surely they went in circles a few times.
Neither of them minded. It was fun and for the first time in too many years Regulus was truly enjoying himself. He found that he was smiling more than he wasn’t, though he tried to hide it constantly. The times that he didn’t successfully conceal his expression, James teased him for it.
The road trip which started very rocky ends up being quite fun. At some point in the middle Regulus forgets that he should be having an awful time. Not because of James. It’s hardly been any time at all and he would usually be having some sort of withdrawal symptoms after the way he drained the hunter. He doesn’t though. He’s okay.
Somehow.
Most of the time he didn’t even find himself thinking about it. Any of the cravings seemed to be set at bay when he would get a taste of James. Not enough to survive, he still needs human blood, but enough to indulge. Regulus from a week ago would hate to know how many times he has bit James. Or how many times he has let him bite back. At least when he’s bitten it’s to help keep James alive.
It’s been confusing. He’s not used to this. He doesn’t really know how to navigate it. They’ve had the past few days to figure it out. You would think they could come up with something, right? Well you would be sorely mistaken.
As James pulls up in front of an inconspicuous yet still lush house, panic flashes in Regulus’ eyes. They will see Sirius again in no more than a minute. As soon as he gets a whiff, he’ll be rushing out to see them. He knows his brother well enough to know to expect that.
“What do we do?” He says frozen to the seat.
“Get out and go see your brother?” James seems to be oblivious to the hesitance in his voice.
“He doesn’t know I would come. He doesn’t know… There’s so much he doesn’t know and I haven’t seen him in decades. He doesn’t-“
“Love, calm down. It will be okay.”
Instead of blushing at being called love, like he expects himself to, he settles. Feeling grounded once again.
“What if he doesn’t want to see me?” It comes from the back of his throat, quiet and not really anything he means for James to hear.
He assures him anyway. “He’ll want to see you.”
He wants to believe him, he wants that to be true. But it’s been nearly one hundred years and he hasn’t once gone looking for his little brother. It’s been seventy years and instead of finding him, he broke a centuries old promise. There’s just no way to be sure.
Either way, he’s going to see Sirius. That choice is already made and there isn’t enough time to back out. The car turns off and it only takes a second for the front door of the house to swing open. His brother standing in the doorway looking skeptically at the car. They had no way to let him know they arrived or even that they were on their way.
Of course Regulus stays put. It’s hard to face possible rejection or disappointment. He would rather run, push it off for a few more months maybe. But James has no such problems or fears, so he his climbing out of the car as fast as he can. The two of them meet each other at the base of the stairs and are immediately embracing.
There’s a pang in his chest that keeps growing. He’s a pot threatening to boil over with feelings that he can’t quite identify. It could be jealousy or it could be something else entirely. He just watches their reunion, wondering what his own will be like if he could only get himself out of the car.
For a second he thinks that Sirius has seen him. The glass is tinted for the sun making it difficult to see through, but not impossible. Their eyes almost meet, but Regulus looks away before he can be sure. He doesn’t think James would blurt out anything about him within the first seconds that they are back together, but that really makes it so that he has to get out for himself.
The two break apart, though only just enough to walk to sit on the steps. He could tune in to hear what they are saying, but he doesn’t want to pry. There are still things that James hasn’t told him and until he has, he won’t break that boundary. As close as they have gotten especially the last few days, he still can respect that they have known each other all of three weeks, not even. He takes this moment to breathe before reaching for the handle.
His head is the first thing to pop out into their view.
“… wait who is— ” Sirius distractedly looks his way, then gasps. “Regulus?”
Sheepishly he swivels his head to look at his brother, one corner of his mouth forming a half smile. “Hey big brother.”
“What the fuck?” His eyes are wide and… well confused. The attention goes back to James, which he partially expected but is not a fan of. “You had my baby brother in your car and you didn’t lead with that? You little shit!”
Regulus isn’t sure what to do now. It’s not a bad reaction, at least not to the fact that he’s here. There was almost love and longing in his voice as he said his name. Almost. If he didn’t know Sirius as well as he does, he would be fooled. It’s more complicated than that though. They both know it.
“Listen, I just wanted to start with the fact that I am alive. Let’s celebrate that, yeah?” James attempts to lessen the rising tension.
It’s a tide, it ebbs and it flows between them. At their best, the water will never take them. They can float side by side for as long as it lasts. When the water rises, when they can barely keep their heads above it, that’s when they take a break. They separate until the water has gone back out to the ocean and there is space for them both.
Right now it’s somewhere in between. If the water is on its way out then they can get through this. Just enough to push it out and grab ahold of each other. If it’s on its way in though, they are seconds away from being submerged. There’s no real way to tell until it’s happened though. No warning signs, just uncertainty.
“I- alright. We can be happy about that and we’ll talk later. Okay Reggie?”
“Yeah, good with me.” He still holds his breathe just in case.
“Reggie… that’s cute. I like it.” James smiles.
“Don’t you fucking dare. Only Sirius can use that nickname.” He warns, throwing daggers with his eyes at him.
The two of them follow Sirius into the house. Or well, James walks in step with him while Regulus trails behind. He doesn’t know how he fits into this. He knows both of them but only separately. He’s not used to having multiple people. Anyone else he has ever had lasted the time between when he would see his brother, and that was never quite as long as it’s been this time.
He hears the teasing coming from in front of him and has to keep from snapping. At either of them. He doesn’t want to even if they are making fun of him. It’s playful, he’s aware. That doesn’t make it any better though.
The house is nice enough, looks to be actually on the nicer side for a safe house. Unless it was meant as a full time home rather than just a stop over. The downstairs is expansive and filled with what looks to be comfortable furniture. There are stairs leading up to likely bedrooms. Nothing is perfect or pristine, so Sirius has obviously been here for the time since he found James.
“What should we start with?” James cuts through the silence.
“I’m gonna get a drink and then we can sit and fill each other in.” There’s an edge to his voice. “Want anything?”
“Just for me.” Regulus answers.
Both James and Sirius look at him judging, but for different reasons. Assuming that they will get into it, he goes to get the glasses without pressing further. While he’s gone, and Regulus should have expected it, James has a full conversation through glances.
You shouldn’t be having any. You know you shouldn’t. Don’t argue with me, you’re in a recovery period and you just had some in the car an hour ago. I’m going to tell him, you can’t stop me. Or something along those lines, he assumes. That’s how he hears it in his head.
Because he is not ridiculous, he uses his words under his breath to keep Sirius from overhearing. “If you withhold blood from me then I’m withholding my veins from you.”
Dramatically, James gasps and clutches at his chest. “You wouldn’t dare!”
“Oh I would. Try me.”
“What are you doing to James?” Sirius times his entrance almost perfectly.
“Nothing,” Regulus answers at the same time James says, “Something awful.”
“I— no actually I have no idea what could be happening.” He slumps into his chair opposite them. “You’re going to have to fill me in.”
He won’t be the first to break. Regulus, while aware of how they got here, isn’t the one who should tell it. That honor would go to James who nearly got himself killed. Technically he nearly got all three of them killed, but that’s just semantics. He’s not really upset at him for it even if he has every right to be. He was only looking for his brother and ended up a target of a well trained hunter. And became both a blood source and a medic for James.
A pouch of blood is handed to him, while Sirius keeps one for himself. It seems they do not have a blood shortage or any trouble supplying themselves, which is good to know. Maybe they could stay here for a while then. James shakes his head in the periphery of his vision, which he assumes in in response to Sirius once again offering him a sip.
His lips find the straw and he inhales it. The blood goes down his throat, warming him as it does. Half the bag is gone in one go. More than James has allowed him to have the whole drive up. Not including the blood from his own veins, but that’s different for him. As he goes for a second gulp, one that could honestly finish the bag, James kicks him.
He kicks him hard and he wants to lash out. Instead he pulls the blood bag away from his lips and sets it down. That should appease James enough. He hopes it’s at least enough to keep him from starting with the killing incident of the hunter.
“After that night a few weeks ago, the hunter caught our scent.”
“I know that James. It’s why I ended up running here, you were supposed to come. I thought you were behind me.” Sirius nods along, sounding exhausted.
Has he looked this tired the whole time? Has he been dealing with other hunters this whole time too?
“Right well, I may have stopped to get some fuel to run all the way here. And the bastard somehow poisoned me. I ended up throwing up all of the blood in my system and in a burning building trapped by Moody.” It’s a shortened version of what led to all of this, but it seems none of them need or want more at the moment.
“And you. How do you come into this?” Sirius turns his attention away from his friend.
He weighs the options of how to start, landing on the rawest version. Stripping back his armor and letting him see the truth.
“I was looking for you.”
“You were,”
“Yes Sirius, I was looking for you. I thought you were the one being tracked and I thought you were the one dying on the floor of that building when I ran in but it wasn’t you. Now here we are.” He snaps.
“You skipped a bit there. James was poisoned? How did you…?”
“I can’t drink blood.” Thankfully he steps in. “Not human blood. I think he did something to the last person I drank from, or one of them, knowing that I would take the bait. I was out of control, I know I was and I’m sorry. I hate getting like that and it nearly fucking killed me.”
The remorse seeps through his words and fills the air around them. It makes him want to apologize too. Sirius has dealt with him losing himself and losing control too many times and he had to do the same thing with James all of these years. At least he’ll never have to deal with James slipping again. Unless he somehow decides to drain another vampire and cause bigger issues.
He holds his tongue though. This right now is between them. it’s not his turn. They decided to start with the last three weeks, not the last seventy years. Regulus will get his turn later. Or whenever he gets the courage to have that conversation. To express his hurt to Sirius. That will take a bit out of him and he doesn’t have that right now.
Regulus doesn’t intrude, he actually moves out of the way to let them sit next to each other. They hug it out, James sputtering apology after apology for how awful he was, how he didn’t think about how what he did would affect Sirius. In contrast to the brother he has always known, Sirius accepts each and every apology, nothing more to it. He dose’t need to do anything to make it up to him.
It’s just okay. Just like that.
Is it because he chose James? Is it because James wasn’t the one to doom him to forever? Or is it just because he’s not Regulus? He would have to grovel, or spend weeks away from each other once he was back to himself. Once he had control again and promised not to mess up again, he would have to earn the trust back from Sirius. It was fine, it’s always been fine that way. Regulus knows that he’s fucked up and he wants to do better.
Maybe the difference is that he almost died. He could mention that the only reason James didn’t die was because he saved him. That would surely earn him some points with his brother. He doesn’t though, this isn’t about him. He has to keep reminding himself that. He and James are different, they mean different things to Sirius, they aren’t the same.
The story goes on, and he notices how James leaves out that he caved and pulled himself out of bed to try to find someone to bite. Once again almost getting them both killed. A wise decision, as Sirius wouldn’t take endangering Regulus very well. At one point in time that would have sent him into a murderous rage, he’s not sure how it would go over right now.
Even if Regulus is a main character in the story he lets James tell it. Whatever parts of it he wants to. When he gets to the part about healing him and figuring out what he can drink, heat rises to his cheeks. He can almost still feel where his fangs were lodged in his neck a few hours ago or where his fangs have been in his wrist time and time again the last few days. It’s a phantom feeling, his fingers mindlessly travel over the spots that don’t have a single mark left.
“Vampire blood?” Sirius’ mouth hangs open as he looks between them. “So you— he— he bit you?”
“Well, do you see another vampire that was around for him to bite?”
“So that’s just how you feed now?” James shrugs and nods. “Alright then, just let me know whenever you need. My wrist is yours.”
It doesn’t surprise him in the least that Sirius is offering himself up without question. James isn’t shocked by it either, though he does look past him to make eye contact with Regulus. He bites his lip to keep from smiling back at him. This is not exactly the time to bring up what has been happening in the car that’s parked out front.
“Er- Thanks Sirius. Really. I’m okay right now. Anyway, once we figured that out I was able to get some strength back. It made it easier for getting the hunter. Which… Regulus did.” James’ voice goes wonky at the end, giving reason for doubt in the words.
“Elaborate.”
With his brother now looking at him trying to get his gaze to come up, he falters. His hand balls into a fist and he wants to reach for the blood bag. But he can’t. He doesn’t. Before he looks to Sirius, he catches a reassuring nod from James.
“I killed him.”
“There’s more…” Sirius pushes.
“I wasn’t trying to, not when I bit him. I was going to rip his head off or let James because he wanted to. He had to pull me off once he had already lost too much blood.” He exhales with the truth.
“You— how are you not… Normally you’re a mess this soon after.”
It’s not the response he expected. He was prepared for yelling, for scolding, for a big fight. Not concern and confusion. He isn’t getting ready to chain Regulus up and dry him out. To force him back to being good.
“I’m not really sure.” James. The answer is James, but he won’t say it.
“You are okay right? You haven’t kept killing after the hunter? It was just the one?”
“Just the one.”
He doesn’t expect it when arms fly around him and pull him in. Instantly though he feels at home. Nothing has ever grounded him like a hug from his brother. When they were kids, this right here was the only safe place, the only escape he ever knew. That has changed, but only because he now has other places he feels okay. Nothing compares to this though.
“I’ve missed you, I’ve missed you so much Reggie.” He repeats in his ear.
Then why did you not come find me all of these years? Regulus doesn’t ask now. He just wants to exist in this moment.
꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷
They seem to agree that all of them need a break. The house is on the edge of a forest, so they decide to have some fun for the night. When the sun comes back up they’ll have to spend the day inside for the most part, so why waste now sitting around and talking.
Regulus has no reason to disagree because he’s all around unsure what to say. He and James need to talk, away from his brother. They need to, but he doesn’t want to. If they’re staying here and all together, it will become obvious sooner or later. James isn’t exactly a subtle person and he’s not been good at keeping his hands to himself. When it’s just the two of them at least.
Before they go out, James drinks. From Sirius this time. It’s nothing like it is when it’s them. But still, Regulus can’t help but hate it. That should be him. They should be in the back seat of the car laying together as he drinks. Regulus waiting for his turn to bite him back.
But no, he’s standing in the archway between rooms watching his sink his teeth into Sirius. His eyes are closed, maybe he’s pretending it’s Regulus instead. He drinks for a few moments from his wrist, nothing crazy. All the while Sirius is practically squirming, not used to the sensation. He’s only been bitten, to his knowledge, once when Regulus turned him.
“Feel better?” Sirius asks wiping away the droplets left behind as James wipes his own mouth, despite it not being a mess at all.
“Mmm thanks. I was alright before, but even better now.”
Regulus crosses his arms, leaning agains the wall. A sour look lands on his face, hating everything that he is seeing.
“Oh stop pouting!” James nudges him and whispers.
“Not pouting.” He fights, reluctantly following them out the door and into the dark.
“Alright, there’s no one around for a while. Only house in the area. But try not to go too far, yeah? Alright, tag you’re it.” He whacks Regulus’ shoulder without warning and speeds off.
He’s stunned and doesn’t move from his spot until James shrugs and darts off. He lets out a long exasperated sigh. Sirius loves to do shit like this. Whenever they are somewhere with room to run he wants to. Part of the freedom they didn’t get as kids, or whatever reasoning he uses. Part of Regulus assumes he just likes to do it to annoy him.
Either way, it does feel nice to run after days cramped in the car. At any point they really could have ditched the car and sped here. With vamp speed it would have barely taken any time at all and James knew exactly where they were heading. Except they didn’t want to. Both of them were quite enjoying the time together and the adventure up to Scotland. The bullshit thing about it being the journey that matters not the destination.
Through the trees he sees occasional specks that are likely his brother or James running, but he doesn’t chase them. Instead he gets to the center of the forest, not in any sort of clearing. They are bound to pass him at any moment, so he sticks both arms out ready to grab onto them.
It’s Sirius who passes first. His fingers slip at the last second, but the contact slowed him down to normal speed for long enough to successful grab him. He huffs and then gives Regulus a ten second head start before running again. Meanwhile, Regulus climbs up one of the trees that has enough foliage to block him from view and settles in. The other two can chase each other for as long as they want.
There’s a lot on his mind and running would usually quiet it. So far it hasn’t. For some reason he decides to sit with his thoughts instead. On one side there’s James and on the other there’s Sirius. He has no idea what to do with Sirius, who is somewhat happy to see him. relieved that he’s okay. Mostly just happy to not have to clean up after him, Regulus concludes.
There’s been no discussion of the fact that James exists and that Regulus has now found that out. Through all that they talked about before, that managed to never come up. Tactfully on Sirius’ part. At least he assumes. He’s always been good at avoiding conversations he doesn’t want to have. The thing is, it’s only him that’s in the wrong here.
Regulus went back, but there was James at the time. He assumed he was either another vampire that was just passing through or some human that he was having fun with for a time. It never seemed like he was welcome to intrude the other times that he has found Sirius with others. So he kept on moving and hoped that Sirius would find him. He didn’t.
Sure he could have gone back another time, but that wouldn’t change that Sirius broke his promise. It wouldn’t change that Regulus would have still returned to find James still there and the hurt would have overwhelmed him. He would have lost it. There was no good option. There never has been.
He’s not sure how long it lasts before a body is settling in on a branch in front of him. At least ten minutes, probably longer. Regulus got lost in his head thinking about what’s to come and what has past. For as long as he’s been alive there is even more ahead of him. An unsettling thought when it comes down to it really. But what he does know is that after seventy years apart form his brother, he doesn’t want that to last any longer. He can push past all of this.
For the most part.
“What are you thinking about?” James’ voice echos.
“How do you know I’m thinking?”
“You always are. Plus you have this look in your eyes and the grey swirls around a bit. Like waves.”
His focus easily pulls to him, his mind shutting him out for now. “Now you’re just making things up. It was nothing. Just something I have to talk to Sirius about later.”
“Ah, the me of it all? I presume.” He looks smug, at being the center of it all. The point of contention.
“Careful, we might leave you to fend for yourself and then who are you going to bite?”
James gasps comically. “Don’t you dare take your pretty little neck away from me.”
It would be easy for him to get lost in this. To have it feel like it’s just the two of them again. It’s more complicated than that now. He knew it would be and he still let this happen. Against his better judgment. Regulus can already see the smoke coming from Sirius’ ears. Though none of this has anything to do with him, so it hardly matters.
Instead he runs. Well, actually he jumps. Regulus jumps down from the tree leaving him behind for now. He’ll be quick to follow, but this saves him from getting caught up in James. There technically is no rush, the sun isn’t yet peaking over the horizon. He can just feel the wind blowing and whispering to him.
He wants to feel at peace. It’s what he’s always wanted really. Most of the time he can find the quiet and calm in this life, or not-life he has. It’s an escape. Being out at night when the world is asleep is a luxury he never had before and he thrives in it. The part he doesn’t like is the loneliness that has crept in against his will.
It was solitude, enjoyably so, until it wasn’t. Until he couldn’t reach Sirius who is always meant to be there with him. These past decades showed him the parts of this life that he never expected. The parts that Sirius seems to have always known would come. The parts that were why he didn’t want this.
At the same time his brother found the light and the better parts of it. Perhaps he’s even found the joy of being a vampire. When he told James how Sirius never wanted this, he was shocked. Has he really changed that much in their time apart? Does he not only thrive but enjoy it now? Did it take being away from Regulus to get to that point?
Just like that he’s drowning in his mind again with thoughts he would rather not have. James is right behinds though, landing from his jump only just to the side of him. “Come on, let’s head back.”
“You can stay, keep running around with Sirius.” The words are icy as they leave his mouth.
“Hey, no. We’re not doing that Reg. I like spending time with both of you, if anything I should leave you two alone it’s been much longer since you have seen each other. I can hang back or in the car or something. So you can talk, or whatever.” He anxiously rambles, trying to see what will stick.
None of it does. “Oh shut up, you’re ridiculous. Let’s just all go back. You still owe me the story of how you turned, in case you forgot.”
On the way back they find Sirius, who was just about to run past the tree they had been in. He’s content going in before sunrise. There is a tickle creeping up in his throat, itching to be soothed by more blood. Regulus knows he shouldn’t, he just had some. As put together as he seems, as shocked by his restraint as Sirius was, he knows he is still struggling.
The one thing that really does help to keep him at bay is James. Not— not in that sense. His presence isn’t what calms him, though it doesn’t hurt. It’s drinking from him. Oddly enough. If things keep going as they have been the last few days, just being near him may end up being enough. He just can’t lose control again. Not around Sirius. doing that, letting that happen, would push him away when he’s just got him back.
The last time he thought about finding Sirius, not including a few weeks ago, he was blood drunk. Killed three people in one night. Doesn’t remember what he did with the bodies. He hardly even remembers what city he was in or if the deaths were reported. He stumbled his way to the house he was staying at and immediately starting looking for where Sirius could be.
He found him, quite easily actually. But told himself he had to come down from the high before going to him. By morning he was coherent, but itching for more blood. If he went to his brother like that, it would be awful. A chance of being turned away. Or he would be locked away until he dried out.
Which, well he needed that. He just didn’t like that he needed Sirius to be the one to do it. So he got through it on his own. Didn’t drink for two weeks. By the time he was back to himself, back on a strictly blood bag diet, Sirius had moved to a new place. He didn’t look for him again.
This can’t be the same. He has him back, he can’t lose control anymore.
“James said you wanted to talk more, he’s upstairs. Giving us space.” Sirius appears in front of him, breaking him from the haze he fell into.
“Oh, well yeah. Think we have some pretty big things to talk about.”
“And what would that be?”
“He goes by the name James, according to you he’s upstairs.” His arms cross over his chest and he glares at Sirius unamused.
“Right. I guess you know that I turned him then?” His standoffish demeanor melts away.
“It came up.”
“I never meant to break our promise. Really I didn’t. It’s just— I shouldn’t be the one to say this.” Sirius cuts himself off.
He just waits. He doesn’t respond, he doesn’t know what to say. Mostly he waits for an apology, that’s something he deserves right? A centuries old promise should mean something. They don’t just expire after a certain amount of time. He held up his end after all. Regulus never even thought to turn anyone else.
It’s a stalemate. Immediately he knows that this has something to do with James. Whatever he wasn’t telling him a few days ago is the same thing his brother isn’t telling him now. It doesn’t sit right with him, not knowing. These are the two people he probably knows best in the world. No one else comes close. Not their parents or Barty or well, those are the only other contenders. He never let himself get this close with anyone after that.
Including James in that is strange. They only just met, but it’s different. They’ve drank each other’s blood, they have been hunted, they have killed. Things that make for instant bonds. Though he would like to think that outside of all of that, he would have still found him and chose him to be in his life. At least now that they got to know each other, he can’t deny the bubbling feeling in his chest.
“He has to tell you.” Sirius finally says.
“Whatever he has to say aside, you broke our promise for someone you barely knew. Why would you do that?”
Miraculously he keeps his voice from breaking. He feels like the little kid he once was, lifetimes ago, and he doesn’t want to get hurt. Sirius never hurt him, he protected him. This is foreign and he hates it. All he could trust when he was younger was his brother, and now that’s tainted. By the only other person in his life at the moment. It’s conflicting and awful and is weighing on his chest much too heavily.
“I— I’m sorry Reggie. I never want to hurt you. I had to turn him and I would have talked to you about it first, but we weren’t talking then.” The cryptic words pass right by him, hardly meaning anything.
With a deep breath he manages to keep his composure. “I don’t like it. You could have easily found me before doing it.”
“I couldn’t. I looked, but time was a factor. James was— he’s the first friend I have found that I wasn’t okay letting go of. I didn’t want to lose him, even when we found each other again. I just had to turn him. It’s like why you turned me.” Sirius spews reason after treason and none of them sound like anything. All half truths.
Footsteps come on the stairs, very faintly. Hesitating. James then peaks his head around the corner and is met with not the happiest of faces. “I can go back up.” He skittishly suggests.
“No, come down. You have something to tell me, it seems.”
“Oh that? Right, okay we are all here I guess it’s time. Can we sit?” He heads to the living room and sinks into the corner of the sofa making himself very small.
Regulus feels uneasy, there’s some tension in the air that he can’t decipher. Sirius doesn’t hide it well either, but takes a seat in the big chair right next to James. His hand rests on the arm, palm up. An offering for James. He doesn’t take it. He remains curled in on himself, knees to his chest, head resting on top.
“It’s okay James, anything you want to share.” Sirius offers encouragement.
All of a sudden Regulus feels like he’s the bad guy here. Despite being the reason that James is alive and functioning right now, the only reason they are all sitting here together now, he’s the villain. Making James talk about something he’s clearly uncomfortable with.
“Only if you want to. Sirius just won’t say anything more about why he did it.”
“Oh right, yeah of course. He wouldn’t tell this to anyone else. He knows it’s mine, and I know I said I would tell you when we got here. So I— sorry, I don’t know where to start exactly.” James sighs eyes looking tired.
He’s never been like this before. Well perhaps not never. Regulus has only known him a few weeks. Though in those few weeks, James never quite seemed sad the way he does now. It’s not a typical sadness, not how he looked when he thought he would die and not see Sirius again. It’s something else entirely.
He studies his face, watching each time it twitches, each time the lines by his eyes and behind his glasses crinkle slightly more. Looks for any sign of anything that would give away what he’s thinking. Surely it can’t be that bad. He’s still here and at least knowing Sirius enough, he nows that he wouldn’t have been turned if he didn’t want it. Sirius would never turn anyone unwillingly, even if he would break their promise at all to begin with.
“It’s about why you turned, right?” He pose the question in hopes that it will prompt him to go on.
“In a way.” James bites at his lip, drawing it back and letting it go over and over. “We met and instantly became friends, it was easy and I hadn’t had anyone else at the time so I clung onto him.”
Starting all the way at the beginning seems like a bit much. It’s also hard to believe that he didn’t have anyone. It seems like he would be a well liked guy. Maybe things were just at a weird time in his life. That’s what would draw Sirius in. He likes to be needed, he likes to take in strays. It’s what he usual does during the time the brothers spend apart. He will sometimes help younger vampires that are struggling.
Something that Regulus would not be good at, so it’s best that he isn’t around for it.
He didn’t tend to take in humans. None that he’s ever been aware of before. The thought pops in his mind that he could have broken the promise even longer ago and he’s just never found out, but he shoves it away as quickly as it comes. He would know. So it’s not a possibility that he actual considers with any merit.
James continues, providing the missing details. “I wasn’t doing good, I had lost a friend and everything felt like it was crumbling around me.” He avoids eye contact as he talks about it, mostly staring past him. “When I started to spend time with Sirius, it was just easier. I wasn’t thrilled about being alive honestly, but I liked to be around Sirius. Eventually he couldn’t keep hiding that he was a vampire and he told me. I told him after that that if he wanted to kill me and have all my blood that I wouldn’t mind all that much. Not exactly in those words, but you get what I’m saying, right?”
“It’s okay, I understand.” He assures him. Regulus knows where this is going, he can already tell. It’s not that hard to piece together.
He does want to hear it though. Maybe that’s cruel, but haring it just solidifies it more for him. Makes it easier to see why he had to be hurt in the process. James didn’t want to be alive, and Sirius… what?
His brother helpfully supplies the answer to his unasked question. “I made a deal with him.”
“What would that be?”
“If it wasn’t better as a vampire he would kill me for real after a year.” James looks down at his fidgeting thumbs. “I just had to give a new way of living a shot before he would let me rule it out entirely.”
A weird quiet falls around them. Now he knows, he can’t even be upset. Whatever the feelings in his chest, he can’t feel any of it because it’s not about him. It’s about James. Life as a vampire is better than life before, but Regulus usually though that because of how their childhood was. How awful their parents were. He never stopped to think that other people would also want an escape. Most vampires that he’s met he never bothered asking why they turned. It never mattered to him.
“Well you’re still here, so I take it it’s been better?” He offers a light response, in an attempt to retrieve James from wherever in his head he’s getting lost.
His gaze lifts to find Regulus, he’s right there waiting. “Yeah, it has.”
The anger doesn’t leave, but it pales in comparison to being glad that James found a reason to keep going. It shouldn’t have needed to happen like that, and it shouldn’t have need to be at the expense of his trust in his brother, but still. It’s a good thing. He can try to let some of the anger go. He can try not to hold a grudge against either of them.
꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷
A lot of conversations happen over the rest of the day. There is also one that very distinctly, does not happen. Or perhaps two, if you include the one that would inevitably follow the first.
He and James are not talking about what happened the other day in the car. Or about all of the times that it happened again after that. For now, none of those kisses or any of the bites for that matter mean anything. Nothing. The drive here was a separate world. It doesn’t exist in the same way that everything else does.
At least that is how Regulus is looking at it. He’s not going to be the one to ask about it. He’s not going to be the one to ask James if they are going to continue doing that or if it really means nothing. Simply because, well he can make it mean nothing. That’s exactly what he is doing now. The lingering feeling on his lips that hasn’t left in days, that means nothing to him. Any thoughts or feelings left behind about James, they’re gone. Locked away.
All of which is perfectly fine by him. He hated him the first two weeks they spent together. He can just as easily go back to that if that’s what he wants. Though hate doesn’t come as easily. Not after knowing how James was before he turned, that settled into a soft spot in his heart and won’t ever leave. So he can’t hate him again, but he can be indifferent.
After hours of sitting around and talking, he retreats to one of the rooms upstairs. He can still somewhat hear them talking if he tunes in to listen, but nothing of interest is a topic of conversation. He and Sirius held he majority of the conversation, yet barely made a dent in all of the catching up they have to do. A few months apart is usually a lot, this is a few decades. Not exactly a one day type of thing.
He isn’t tired, he still doesn’t really need sleep, but he enjoys the reprieve of it when he can. As soon as he lies down though his body sighs into the pillows. Rest could do him some good. It may not be true tiredness, but Regulus’ body grew a bit stiff sitting in a car for as long as he did. There’s no one hunting them anymore, there’s absolutely no where that he needs to be. He can enjoy this.
Foolishly, he thought he actually would. He gets maybe thirty minutes of peace. The sound of footsteps coming up the stairs bring him back to being alert, he tunes in his hearing and waits. Two doors open and shut, so he goes back to resting. Hoping that maybe sleep will carry him off until the sun sets again.
That would be too easy though. Just as he starts to slip away, his own door opens and closes. Neither of them really have a need to come disturb him unless something is happening. Unless another hunter decided to bother them, in which case he would get up take care of it and come right back here.
Instead, and letting him know for sure that it’s James who came in, the duvet shifts and a second body settles into the bed.
“James.” He stiffly addresses him without turning over. “What are you doing here?”
“Just wanted to come say hi.” He keeps his voice low.
Perhaps that first conversation is about to happen now. Whether Regulus wants it to or not. “You’ve said hi now, you can go back to your room.”
“I’d prefer to stay here. If that’s alright.”
Even with his back turned he can tell there is a smirk spreading across his face. He’s tempting him, and it might just be working. It’s not that he doesn’t want James here, there aren’t really any reasons he doesn’t. Just the fact that he would have to let down more of his walls. They already spent days together driving and kissing in the back seat like teenagers. A bed is quite a bit of an upgrade really.
He just doesn’t know where this would leave them. Or himself. He’s never let any one in all that much. Even those he has, he keeps at a distance. Would he be able to do the same with James? Or would he knock every wall down with ease? It’s a risk and he’s not sure if he should take it.
Does he even have a choice anymore?
Their blood courses through each other’s veins, they are so intertwined that whatever decision he makes is already made. There is no other way it could go when you think about it. Was there anything to be done from the first bite, or had they already been lost to each other then?
He rolls over. “Yeah, you can stay here.”
“Good, you would have had to drag me out of here otherwise.” Stupidly, Regulus tilts his chin up to kiss him. “Is there more where that came from?”
Shaking his head he makes a little tsk tsk sound. “Not with my brother just two doors away there’s not.”
“He doesn’t have to know! Well, I don’t really want to hide anything from him, but that’s not the point right now. He won’t hear us.”
“This is not the first time I’ve done this.” Regulus argues, not meaning it to come off the way it does. “I just meant, Sirius and I have lived together many times, walls are never as thick as you need them to be with our advanced hearing.”
“Oh is that so? Hold on. I’m gonna prove it to you.” He rolls out of the bed, leaving a dent behind him that he would prefer is filled again.
“What are you—” He doesn’t have to finish the question, he’s already bracing himself for what is coming.
“Sirius!” He yells pressed up against the closed door.
It should only be a moment before his brother is rushing in. If he’s alert even less time. There have been times in the past that all it took was Regulus sucking in a gasp for Sirius to appear knowing that something is wrong. He can imagine he’s just as fast at jumping to the rescue or to aid James.
Except he’s not. A beat passes and then another. Nothing else is moving in the house except for them. Regulus listens as hard as he can, until the sound from Sirius’ room reaches him. He’s breathing normally, he’s likely asleep actually. It’s enough to ease his mind just enough. Enough that he’s not going to turn James away right now.
He rather would like to have their lips on each other again.
Not to mention the fact that Sirius took over on drying him out after he lied, by omission, when he took the blood bag earlier. He hasn’t been allowed any more and it seems that anything he will be allowed will solely be dictated by his brother. In a way he missed this, it’s an odd sort of comfort. So he would like to sink his teeth into James again, ease the pangs in his chest as best he can.
“C’mon, I told you it was okay. He’s asleep.” James slides right back in, instantly everything feels better.
He fits perfectly right here next to him. They slot together nicely. Regulus feels better with him there, with his head now resting on his chest. They stay like that for a while, knowing that they can. There is no one after them, there is no more ticking clock of when things will go wrong. It’s just them. They can finally just be.
“If he blows up about this, it’s on you.” Regulus teases. He’s not joking though.
“I can handle that. Now, about there being more? I believe we came to that conclusion…”
“Oh shut up.”
He lifts his head, followed by pushing himself up just slightly, now propped on his hands hovering over James. He looks pretty from this angle too. A nice mental image for himself later. Regulus dips his head down, but he doesn’t have to go far. James is already leaning up to meet him.
“Did you know that you look really pretty? The way your hair falls around your face from above me. I like it.” He’s not at all subtle with the compliments, it happens to be working though.
“I do know that. Back to what I said before, shut up James.”
There’s something soft and slow about the way they kiss. For two beings that can move incredibly fast, this feels like time has stopped. Perhaps it has. Nothing around them moves unless they touch it, even the air seems to come to a halt. James’ lips on his are intoxicating and yet still so soft.
As if blood has never touched them. Even sweeter knowing that’s not possible.
His own blood has painted his lips more than a few times.
A whine almost comes out from the back of his throat when James pulls their lips apart, but it settles when he reconnects with Regulus’ jaw and then his neck. His mouth ghosts over where his fangs have already been. It’s static against his skin. A buzzing that calls out to him.
Again he retracts his lips from Regulus, but this time he’s expecting it. He could feel the hesitancy through his mouth only seconds before. Tempted to take it further, but holding himself to always making sure it’s okay first.
“Can I…?”
“I was going to ask the same thing.” He breathes out the words.
To this, James nods slowly but oh so eagerly. “Yes, please.”
It goes right to his head. He can’t hold himself back, it’s a wonder he lasted this long. As he fangs tighten, he draws his tongue over them. If he could hold control over himself he would be locking eyes with James before diving in. But he’s in the process of drying out again, so control is out of the question.
Distantly, as he pierces the skin of James’ neck, he wonders if he can even say he’s drying out right now. Blood dances on his tongue and he finds he doesn’t care. There’s nothing like James’ blood. It wouldn’t make a difference what anyone has to say about this. He just knows that he wants whatever this is.
The difference between this and when he drinks from anyone else, is that he knows how to take his time. He could possibly do it with others if he tried hard enough. But with James, he wants it to last. He doesn’t want to take his teeth out of him. With James, it’s the act of biting, it’s the intimacy of tasting his blood in his mouth. That’s what he likes about this, it drives him mad.
“Having your blood be drunk should not feel this good.” James’ laugh reverberates against him.
Regulus doesn’t respond, he’s a bit busy. This is what he likes, he’s good when it comes to drinking blood. Talking was never his thing. It’s only natural for him to respond by biting harder instead of with words.
The one sided conversation continues, and he wishes there was a comfortable way for James to bite him right now too. “Fuck, that really shouldn’t… Reg, god. This is incredible. Can I—?”
They’re on the same page. He should have expected it. His neck isn’t exactly easy to reach while he’s buried in James’, but his wrist could be. Instead of holding himself up with his hands, he drops to collide with him, knees straddling his hips. Regulus lifts his left arm above his head, close enough for him to grab it and bring it to his lips.
First pressing a kiss to where he has been before, then sinking his teeth in. They both lean into it more, lean into each other more. Losing themselves in each other. There is less of a divide between James and Regulus, they are more one than anything. Blood flowing between them.
Only a little bit of blood. Regulus can faintly remember what too much would feel like. Not that he’s ever been that close to being drained, but it’s a weird light headedness that comes with the brink. Different than the static rushing through him now, he’s still present. Hyper present, rather than starting to fade would be more accurate.
They both savor the bite of it, rather than the blood. Not for lack of enjoyment of that piece of it all too. James gains more by drinking from his wrist, it’s what he now needs to survive, but he’s not doing the same as he usually would. This is a different kind of bite. Purposeful in a new way, intentionally not drawing more than a few drops of blood.
That’s not exactly the kind of restraint that Regulus is capable of presently, but he tries. He starts to sense that it’s been longer than they have done this before, more blood too. he’ll have to pull himself off soon, but he doesn’t want it to end. He doesn’t want to wipe the blood from his lips. If he could stay right here for years he would. Technically they could, if they include breaks for Regulus to drink at least a few sips of blood that is nutritious to him.
The real strength comes as he opens his mouth wider, letting his fangs gently pull from the punctures in his neck. There are a few pin pricks of blood that his tongue laps up happily. Just as his head lifts to look at James, hoping to catch him before he pulls away too, their eyes meet. He almost wishes they hadn’t, watching James drink when he’s not aware is somehow better than when they hold each other’s gaze.
He’s torn between leaning right back down to press their bloody mouths together, or saying one of the million thoughts buzzing around in his mind. He takes too long and isn’t given the opportunity to do either.
“I— what the fuck?”
Standing in the doorway is a, for lack of better words, confused Sirius. The glow of the light from the hallway seeps in around him, illuminating the room that was previously flooded with darkness. There are black out curtains on he windows, not allowing any light so he has no idea what time it is or how long it has been. But neither of them heard the door open. Why did the door even open? Why did Sirius walk in here?
A drop of blood pools in the corner of his mouth, he swipes it away with his thumb. “What are you doing here?”
“I heard something. I thought you were sleeping, so I came to help in case something was wrong. Which, it feels like there is but I have no idea what to do to help. I’m gonna just…” He spins on his heel, regretting possibly every decision he’s made in his life.
It’s not as if they have never seen when the other is with a partner. They have lived together for a long time, it was common practice, maybe not that common but enough that they knew how to behave, for one or both of them to have people over for a day or night. Whenever possible they would leave the house to give privacy, or they would make sure to tell each other when the coast was clear.
That’s not a fool proof way to do things and they don’t have a witch on retainer to do sound proofing spells whenever they wish. So things happen. This just, was not meant to be a time when things happen. They were supposed to talk before this could happen. It was certainly not meant to be as they are doing this. Regulus almost would rather his brother walk in on him having sex than this. There is no way out of explaining what he saw. He wouldn’t let it go either.
He does fully leave though, which at least gives them a moment to… compose themselves? As best they can that is. Both of their wounds, if that’s what you want to call them, have healed over. Just small drops of blood resting on the skin waiting to be wiped away. James, because of course he does, licks them off his wrist and he almost forgets why they pulled apart at all.
“Come on, James. We should…” He trails off, distracted watching him pay no attention to his words.
“It can wait, I’m not done with you.” The way his voice glides through the air he almost wants to give him everything he could ever ask for.
But not right now.
“No, let's go.” He rolls out of the bed reaching back to drag James along too. “I don’t even know what to say to him.”
At this point he’s just muttering under his breath trying to come up with some explanation that would seem reasonable. Nothing will, but he tries anyway. He’s the less messy of the two. Aside from when he loses control which is a rare outlier. Regulus doesn’t do things like this, his life is more clean cut. He’s reasonable and responsible. This, well this is something Sirius would do. He hates it, but he couldn’t stop it. Once the first bite set it all in motion he was helpless.
Following behind him James tries to give his input. Faintly the sounds of his voice just barely break through to him. He doesn’t listen, he’s too focused on working through this logically. Finding some way to piece it together that doesn’t make him seem like he’s gone insane. He hasn’t, at least he would like to prove that he hasn’t.
Right so, they… How can he even try to make this make sense? James needs vampire blood to survive, and they found that out while it was just the two of them. Of course he would have drank from Regulus, that was already obvious. It’s the being in bed together and Regulus having his fangs in his neck part that has no explanation. There is no way around that.
Even if he couldn’t hear Sirius’ footfall pacing in the kitchen, he would have known that is exactly where he could find him. The same would be true in reverse. They both have a habit of making tea when they need to think, something they have been doing since before turning. It just stuck. That’s where he is, though Sirius doesn’t turn at the sound of them in the doorway. He outright refuses to.
“Sirius.” He attempts, keeping his voice level. A mask to the uncomfortability.
“Nope. I don’t— I don’t care. That is none of my business.” His head shakes back and forth.
“It’s not what it looked like.” Regulus tries again, but it back fires.
James just had to take that comment literally, despite not actually talking to him about any of this up until now. “Oh is that so? Do I mean nothing to you then?”
“You two haven’t even talked?” This gets Sirius to engage somehow. He turns around almost appalled. “You just bite each other and what? Roll around in bed and that’s just nothing?”
“I thought you didn’t want any part of this.” Regulus crosses his arms and raises a brow at him. Mostly just deflecting again, because he hates every part of this.
“Oh I don’t. You’re just so unbelievably dense.”
“This could have been avoided if your best friend wasn’t an idiot that nearly died. You’re welcome for saving him by the way.”
“Don’t even Reggie. You could have saved him without also fucking him.”
“Maybe I should let you two talk.” James tries to back away, unsuccessfully. “But for the record, we didn’t fuck.”
“Not the time James.” Both brothers fall in sync and snap at him with their mannerisms mirroring the other.
His hands come up to catch his face and his thumb circle his temples. As much as the cravings subside when he had his fangs in James, he can still feel the affects of not having any blood right now. He still needs it. If he could just have a few sips from a blood bag, then this would go over much easier. He just does’t have it in him right now to do this.
“So you’re just… biting him for fun?” Sirius questions. “You know what, have fun. There are worse things you could be doing. Just do not hurt each other. That’s all I care about.”
“Wasn’t going to.” James confirms reflexively as Regulus nods in agreement.
“Great, now that I know you don’t hate him for me turning him anymore, let’s just move on. Yeah?” Sirius grabs his mug of tea and walks toward the stairs. “The water is still hot if you want some tea. No blood though.”
Just like that the tension is gone. He can breathe normally again. It was never a matter of Sirius approving of them doing whatever they are doing. Not really. He knew it could be awkward or a bit strange for a time, but after all of these years they only want each other to be happy and to be okay. He wouldn’t be mad at either of them for being together, if that’s even what they are now.
Finding out the way he did is definitely not ideal though. Biting another vampire isn’t exactly normal or something everyone does. Through all of this though, there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. Two weeks ago, Regulus had no idea if he would be here and staying here. He knew he would see Sirius again, but would it just be briefly.
Maybe it was always up to him. If he could get past the James of it all. If he could put aside the hurt he feels to see how things could be going forward. It seems that he can. There is a way for them to all slot together. It’s not one of the other like he thought it would have to be.
“So, back to your room?” James flashes him a, not at all sexy, toothy grin.
He cracks and laughs. “You’re ridiculous.”
“You like me.”
“To be determined.”
“Sure, Reg. Whatever you say.” James is the one to reach out his hand this time and pulls him along.
꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷
It took a few weeks for things to settle. For them to find what their new normal is. Mostly because Sirius, while not characteristically different when he is with Regulus or James, has lived very different lives with each of them. The only thing that they have found to be exactly the same is how he deals with them when they had been out of control. The way he dries them out.
That’s a big reason it takes time to figure things out. Regulus needed to get back to functioning more normally. He had to prove he could resist any cravings. Which he had already been doing, he just had to show he was on the up to Sirius. Fair enough. Though much to his annoyance, now that Sirius knew about their little escapades, he forbid them until Regulus was done being dried out.
Torturous is what that was.
Now he’s being allowed blood in small doses. Still monitored by Sirius, never given the bag to take what he wants. But it’s better than nothing. They have a routine down and Regulus knows that it’s the best way to keep from losing control again. He’s not sure that it will ever be able to happen again now that he’s back wit Sirius and has James. It’s not impossible, but it would take a lot. And to even find the opportunity would be the hardest part.
Both brothers are helping to sustain James. It doesn’t seem to be affecting either of them much, not really losing significant amounts of blood. This is all new territory for them. They haven’t been able to find anything about other vampires who have been poisoned this way, or any that survive without human or animal blood. He’s one of a kind it seems.
The safe house up in Scotland has been nice. No one around, and Sirius still has a steady source of blood bags to pull from. It’s not a place they can stay in for much longer though. They’re all getting a bit stir crazy even with the woods behind the house that extend all around them. They need more and a change of pace.
Also preferably somewhere that will have some sound proofed bedrooms. There has only been one other run in since the first, though they all but set it up themselves. James was sure that Sirius had gone out and would be out for hours. They were meant to have the house to themselves, so they didn’t exactly bother with the bedroom.
It was a few days ago, so past the ban on Regulus’ blood consumption. Also well past when they finally talked about what they have been doing. Not exactly to his surprise, they were on the same page. As much as Regulus wanted to continue what they were doing, James did too. They both wanted more even. More than just blood, they wanted each other.
Which all leaves them here. Sitting in the living room, Sirius on his computer scrolling through different sites and occasionally turning it around to show them what he finds.
“What about this one?” On the screen is a three bedroom villa in Italy, already outfitted with sun proof windows.
“Why do we need an extra bedroom?” James doesn’t miss a beat with his question.
“What if Reggie here decides he hates you again?”
“Then I can just swap brothers and stay with you.”
Both of them glare at him, mouths agape.
“Actually Sirius, I think a two bedroom would be great. Just us, we leave him behind. What do you think?” Regulus tuts.
“Hey! How about we don’t do that. Three bedrooms sound great to me.” He quickly back tracks, despite knowing he’s only teasing.
“So this one? I think I know a witch down in Italy to help out with anything we need. But don’t you think it’ll be nice to get away?” Sirius looks for confirmation from his brother.
“I do, but can we make a few stops first?”
Most things that they could need they can find once they get there. Regulus would however like to stop back at the last house and get some of his things that were left there before they had to flee. So over a few days they pack up what they have and head south, this time not bothering with a whole road trip. Just running, now that they all have the energy to.
Everything is exactly as he left it, the bed even still has signs of James practically dying in it. He puts his things in his bags pretty quickly while Sirius makes a run to pick up a few more blood bags. They won’t know where to pull from in Italy yet, so arriving with enough for a week or two is best.
He watches across the room as James scans the surroundings. “I hardly remember those days when we were here.”
“I figured as much. You were asleep more than you weren’t.” Regulus nods. “I hated you at the time.”
“I know. Do you hate me now?”
“You know the answer to that.” On the spectrum of feelings about him, somehow Regulus leans more toward love now. Something he never expected.
“Doesn’t mean I don’t want to hear you say it.”
He appeases, just enough. “I don’t hate you.”
“James! Reggie! You better be fully clothed with your fangs away when I walk in.” Sirius yells from beyond the front door, just slightly traumatized.
It’s clear, the spark in James’ eye gives it away. He already has the lie queued up on his tongue, just loud enough for him to hear. “Oh shit, let me get dressed.”
“He’s kidding. You’re good to come in. I’m all set anyway, we can head out.” He lightly smacks him, passing by and meeting Sirius in the entry.
They pause to make sure everything gets packed away for the journey and Sirius looks around, seeing where his brother had been living for at least a few weeks. This was never a long term stay place, but it was still one of many that Regulus lived in without him. There used to never be that many of those. Only one, sometimes two, for every time they took a break from each other. Now there are close to a hundred for the decades apart.
“You had to run from here quickly, right? Where did you go?”
Over the weeks since reuniting, he’s asked a lot and Regulus has told a lot. Often times there was malice in the questions, more accusatory than concerned, or worried about the harm coming to both of them. It’s been complicated especially seeing as he was responsible for healing James or leaving him to die. This question is genuine though, simply curious.
“Our first house.” Regulus replies with ease, some fondness seeping through.
“That house?”
“Christ no, not our parents’. Ours. After we turned.”
Sirius instantly softens. He knew he would, that was their place. The first place they ever got a true taste of freedom. More than a taste, the whole world was at their fingertips. Things were far from perfect, Regulus was a disaster when it came to his transformation and Sirius was struggling to be okay with what he was.
But they had each other and were far from the grasp of their parents. That’s really all that mattered to them when they lived there.
“I should tell you though,” Regulus starts again. “It got a bit destroyed when we were taking care of the hunters.”
“One day we can go back and rebuild. Make it a permanent home for us. If you want.”
“I’d like that.” He nods.
It’s strange, but mostly comforting, how easily they slot back into each other’s lives. As if no time has passed. They are, for the most part, still the same as they were decades ago. Some differences can’t be avoided, they have grown with the world, but they look just as they always have. No amount of anger could get them to not want to come back to each other.
Even if they had completely changed, if they were barely recognizable, he thinks they would be able to work just as easily. Something inside of him would know Sirius anywhere, he would know even if they looked different. They are forever connected, always brothers. He shouldn’t have worried at all what things would be like when they found each other again. Of course they would be easy.
A hundred or two hundred years ago that might not have been true. Parts of it at least. They had to get to this point. There will still be fights, but don’t all siblings fight? At the end of the day they are happy to have each other. It’s always much easier being together than wondering where the other may be and what could be happening. Perhaps this time it will stick, no more time apart.
Though, eternity is quite long to make that sort of promise, so it remains unspoken between them.
“Are you two ready?” James pokes his head around the corner of the other room.
“Yeah, let’s go to Italy.” He nods back at him.
“Too bad we can’t enjoy the sun, that used to be my favorite part.” He pouts. “Oh, also can I get some blood for the run?”
“We don’t have to do it all in one go if we don’t want to.” Regulus affirms, still extending his arm in his direction.
He hums as his teeth puncture the skin of his wrist. When it’s like this, just to drink, he goes quickly. Just sucking in as much blood as he needs and then pulling away. Wiping any excess blood away as the bite heals itself. Simple and fast. James only takes a sip this time having just had some earlier. He would let him have all of his blood if he wanted, which scares him a bit.
Just as they leave the building, getting ready to run, someone walks by. If they can just pass quickly, then they can go. It’s not advised to run at super speed in front of people you don’t know, and they have had enough trouble recently. Unfortunately that seems to be continuing, at least for now. All Regulus can do is let out a heavy sigh, because there was no other way this would go.
“Bold to come back after killing Moody.” The woman tuts, slowly pulling a stake out of her jacket.
“You have got to be kidding.”
“There’s still more of you?” He groans. “Alright let's make this quick. Sirius?”
Simple as that, they fall into their old ways. The brothers have had multiple run ins with hunters, every so often, though usually when they are together, so this is easy. Sirius jumps into motion and restrains her arms and tosses the stake to the side.
“Do the honors?” His head tilts looking over from behind her.
“My pleasure.” With a smirk he strides over. “Since you’re going to die either way, might as well tell us how many more of you are after us. Promise I’ll make it quick if you do.”
“Just me. It was three of us.” She spits out, and seconds later he snaps her neck. Putting an end to this all finally.
“I’ve finished cleaning up your mess James.” Regulus teases.
“Oh in that case, I guess I’ll have to thank you. I’ve already got a few ideas.” A wicked grin flashes, before Sirius promptly smacks the back of his head.
“Let’s just get to Italy first. Then you two can do whatever the hell you want. Out of my earshot.”
꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷
Getting settled in a new place takes a bit of time again. They had just gotten into a routine up in Scotland and now it’s all different. They don’t have an expansive forest to run through whenever they want and they also don’t know the town they are in at all. It’s harder to explore entirely after sundown, but that’s something to work through another time.
For now they simply want to relax. No more hunters tracking them, no more mysterious diseases, just a normal life. Normal for a vampire at least. No one is being dried out, no one is struggling to drink responsibly or drink at all. Everything is good.
The first night, without truly meaning to, James and Regulus shared a room. They just got carried away. Then for about a week after that, they at least pretended to have separate rooms. Not diving deeper into a relationship that they had yet to label than they already had. A week was pushing it and they spent a majority of the time glued to the other’s side only separating briefly each day.
No one has been able to get through the wall Regulus has built as armor as easily as James has and continues to. He doesn’t even want to push him away. There are times that he will freak himself out and worry that he let him get too close. Worry that everything will come crashing down and he could end up losing both him and Sirius. But most of the time, he’s happy and that surprises him.
After a week of feigning any true distance, they give up the act. Sirius is more used to them and really he doesn't have a problem with it. He only makes faces at them when they come down with blood on their lips or if they forget about personal space, though it’s all lighthearted. It’s all part of growing pains of living together again really. it’s nice. It’s the first time in so long that things have really felt this good for Regulus.
“What are you thinking about?” James comes up behind him, wrapping his arms around his waist.
They’re standing on the terrace over looking the sea. The town is far from any big cities so the stars are prominent in the sky. Even more so than up in the countryside or the highlands. No clouds litter the sky, a perfectly clear night. He’s torn between watching the waves crash in the distance or scanning the sky for constellations. Both feel like freedom, both always reminded Regulus that more was out there when he was a kid.
He doesn’t need that reminder any more. He feels free just being here.
“It took a lot to get here.”
“Mmm I suppose it did.”
“Did you ever think you would get this in life?”
“No, did you?” With this James shifts so that Regulus’ head can rest on his shoulder.
“I hoped. I never thought it was possible, but I hoped.”
In his mind he’s sometimes still the little boy he once was. Hundreds of years ago now, but it barely even feels like five minutes. He wanted out, he wanted to be free, he wanted a life he could enjoy living. He wanted to find where he fits in the world. There are still trade offs, but he’s much better off like this.
“We have it now. And we have each other. The world is our oyster, what would you like to do with it?”
Hmm, what does he want? He’s got the main things. His brother, his freedom, James. That’s really all he needs. In a matter of weeks the list of people he really cares about doubled. Granted it only had one person on it originally and now there are two. He never expected that. For a minute there he thought about letting James die, and now he can’t imagine being here without him.
All it took was a drop of his blood and everything changed.