Darkest Night (Snape)
“Oh, you gotta be kidding me,” Erica groaned, throwing her head back in exasperation as the lights went dark. Wind howled outside, Mother Nature in the throes of a tantrum dumping an obscene amount of snow on Hogsmeade. To top off this delightful last night of peace and quiet, students were set to return tomorrow.
Unperturbed, Severus light a fire in the hearth with with his wand while Erica went to flip the breakers to no avail. They’d spent a pretty penny “muggle-fying” their home, but alas, even that wasn’t infallible against a snowstorm.
In the darkness, hands smoothed down Erica’s sides. Once upon a time, the perpetrator would’ve earned a gnarly elbow to the nose back when she lived alone, always on high alert. She and Severus had that in common. But as Severus had mellowed out with age, Erica grew accustomed to sharing her space with another person.
“Thank you for not breaking my nose,” Severus murmured playfully in her hear, his hair tickling her face. Even now, she couldn’t completely kick the tension coiling in her body on these sneak attacks.
“I’m sure Derek wouldn’t appreciate having to swing by to fix your nose. God knows, you won’t let me.”
“I’ve seen you physically reset broken noses. No, thank you.” Casting a lumos, he too took a look at the breaker box, not that he knew what to do with it. “Any luck?”
“Nope, this storm’s a killer,” Erica groused, thankful for his proximity. She didn’t do cold anymore. A winter spent undercover as a vagrant in New York City chasing Wizard drugs was enough cold for a lifetime. They returned to the sitting room, Erica noticing the snow now tightly packed against the window, almost completely obscuring the moonless dark sky. Idly, she wondered if it’d hold beer or rum as a poor man’s freezer. If the lights didn’t come back soon, that’s probably what she’d start doing.
Her husband took a different approach to their conundrum, busying himself with a tea kettle. Hot tea was definitely warranted. Returning to her post on the couch, she burrowed under Severus’ childhood quilt, one of the few items she insisted he bring from Spinner’s End to his new life. What he claimed to be old and raggedy, Erica argued was broken in and cozy. Severus relented, muttering she at least had the broken part right.
The moment Severus sat down, she scooted to his side. For snuggles, yes, but also to leech his body heat. The man was a self-sustained furnace. Without argument, he wrapped an arm around her and returned to his book. Even in the dancing firelight he was handsome. At least in her eyes. A smile curved Erica’s features as she remembered his initial awkwardness when they first started dating, specifically the time she jumped into the perpetually cold spring. He’d wrapped her in his cloak and stiffly rubbed his arms. The tension broke when she made a lewd joke about a better way to warm her up. As they navigated their new relationship, his awkwardness, like the snow, melted away. Eventually he allowed himself to enjoy this new intimacy.
Not that he’d willingly disclose that to anybody, though the Hogwarts staff occasionally caught glimpses of his tenderness towards her. It was just one of the many things she loved about Severus Snape.
Too comfortable to move, Erica levitated a cookie to her mouth as she resumed her own book.
“Really?” She could practically see his amusement. “The Oxford Dictionary should have your picture next to the word sloth.”
“I’m conserving my strength,” Erica retorted. “It’s our last night of vacation. I gotta keep my winning catching students out of bed streak going.”
Severus shook with silent laughter. Erica Crawford, now Snape, was the love of his life. If nothing else, the fact he accepted that while he kept a neatness about his living space, Erica embraced the chaos. Though perhaps her rightfully earned place among the elite Erebos Brotherhood required such fluidity. There was no denying her intelligence nor her bravery, but the moment any sort of break, away from both Hogwarts and Erebos, Erica took full advantage of every meaning of the word holiday. But if they were ever summoned, she’d immediately snap back to the lethal and methodical bitch (her words) he loved.
A small dab of frosting to his nose interrupted his musings, causing a blush to creep up his cheeks at the memory of what they’d done with said frosting merely a couple weeks prior. The ensuing deep clean of the kitchen and hallways the next day were well worth the dalliance.
“Holy shit, it’s January 5th!” Erica exclaimed, shooting to a sitting position, almost jostling his teacup the floor in the process. Severus arched an eyebrow in question, silently racking his brain for any missed engagements. Satisfied they were in the clear, he tugged her to his chest once more.
“I knew one day you’d master the calendar,” Severus deadpanned, blocking the elbow to his ribs. “Perhaps I’ll teach you how a clock works next.”
“Oh, well then. I guess I won’t tell you why today’s important.” Her eyes gleamed mischievously. If only to annoy him she’d keep her word, but now he was curious.
“Okay, I’ll bite. What is the significance of January 5th?”
“Ever hear of the schnabelperchten?”
“Schnabelperchten,” Severus repeated, the word rolling off his tongue with a mix of disdain and intrigue. “Sounds like a poorly imagined hex.”
“Ha ha.” Erica rolled her eyes. “They’re a creepy bit of folklore from Austria.”
Now she held his attention. Another thing he loved about her. She knew much more of the magical world than him. While Severus excelled in potions, Erica’s specialty was regional magic and she’d experienced a large swath of the world’s magic. Many a late night had been spent discussing the Dark Arts over a glass of wine.
Folding his arms, he indulged her. “Do go on, my dear.”
“Well, they’re little humanoid things with massive beaks who basically form a hunting party on the twelfth night of Christmas, which is…”
“January 5th.”
“Ten points to Slytherin!”
“If only,” Severus snorted. “What allure does the twelfth night hold for them?”
“Because that’s the night before the Christian Epiphany, which they believe is the true beginning of the new year. So it makes sense the schnabelperchten conduct their inspection the night before.”
“How quaint. I’m sure the little thieves serve a conveniently moral purpose.”
“You could say that,” Erica yawned. “The schnabelperchten bring happiness and blessings to those who enter the new year prepared.”
“A Yuletide audit, fantastic. As if we don’t have enough to do with the new term approaching. What do they search for?”
Erica glanced around their slightly unkempt living room. “To make sure homes are clean. Ya know, clean slate for a new year.”
Now Severus surveyed their space, his nostrils flaring with a partial huff of laughter. “So you’d fail. I assume they’d curse you for the failure.”
“See that’s where it gets creepy.” Erica paused for dramatic effect. “They carry a big pair of old timey shears on their belt and if they don’t like what they see, they gut the offenders and stuff their carcass with the offending clutter.”
“A bit over dramatic, but I empathize with the sentiment.”
“We’ll tidy up after the first week of class,” Erica placated, patting his chest affectionately. “Maybe I’ll find a French maid outfit.”
A particularly aggressive gust of wind took out their fire, plunging them into darkness once more.
“Darkest night of the year indeed,” Severus sighed in frustration at the interruption, getting up to toss another log in the hearth.
“Did you hear that?” Erica murmured, her tone concerned.
“Har har.”
“No, I’m serious.” Blankets rustled, pooling around her feet. “Listen.”
Severus cocked his head, only hearing the relentless howl of the wind outside. But underneath it there was a peculiar sound.
The door.
Silent as a wraith, Severus stepped past Erica, his tone calm but firm. “Stay here.”
“Are you fucki—”
“Stay,” he repeated, ignoring her indignant huff. God help them if one of the neighbor’s spawn took the opportunity of the storm to cure their boredom. Slowly he reached for the doorknob, the brass icy to the touch. Finally, the blasted wind abated, but the odd scratching sound remained. Only it was somewhere else now, a window in the kitchen.
As he crept towards the kitchen, his feet tangled in something. The fucking blanket Erica dropped. But she wasn’t there. Blindly, he continued, bumping into her hunched form. Her hand found his, yanking him down beside her.
“How do they get in?” Severus asked lowly, not bothering to feel embarrassed at the absurd question. Muggles occasionally caught glimpses of aspects of the Wizarding World. It wasn’t completely implausible these schnabelperchten were of their realm.
“They pick locks with their shears,” Erica murmured. Something thudded overhead. Both shot their attention above.
“The attic.”
On this darkest night, they finally caught a break in the clouds. Weak moonlight filtered through the trees outside, casting twisted shadows in the house.
“At least our bedroom’s clean.”
Severus ignored the weak attempt at humor. Light footsteps, almost like the stealthy feet of a sure footed schnabelperchten descended the stairs. Severus tugged Erica to the kitchen so at least she could escape, but she resisted, furiously shaking her head. They’d long ago agreed if one stayed, the other would.
“One the count of three we stun and run.” The plan wasn’t perfect, but doable.
“One”
The creature completed its descent.
“Two”
It found the squeaky floorboard Severus had been meaning to replace.
“Three”
Twin red jets shot forth, the mark deflecting their attack with a yelped, “the fuck!” The lights flickered back to life, revealing a diminutive shadowy creature with gold eyes. Their eternal pest.
“Virgil?”
Relieved laughter bubbled up Erica’s throat, causing her to lose her balance and landing in Severus’ lap. He caught her, not nearly as amused.
“You two enjoy your first Christmas together?”
“Have fun at the castle?” Erica asked, crawling to her feet. “You didn’t have to make yourself so scarce.”
Severus disagreed but remained silent, staring daggers at the little bastard.
“You meant to say ‘thank you Virgil for giving us the space to get freaky on our first Christmas married,’” Virgil corrected, swiping a cookie from the kitchen. “I’m glad to see it involved chocolate.”
Whether the creature knew of their activities while he was away, Severus couldn’t be sure. Still, it didn’t stop his ears turning red.
Virgil paid them no mind, devouring the sweet before grabbing a couple more to enjoy in “his attic.”
“He’s often insufferable,” Severus grumbled, slowly climbing to his feet. Perhaps rattled, Erica tidied the living room, folding the blanket she left carelessly on the floor. Shaking his head in amusement, Severus caught her by the waist.
“And you, my love, have a remarkable talent for making even the darkest night memorable.”