A Very Potter Christmas

Step two was less fun. The socialising.

It started off well enough. As usual, the Potters flitted from ally to ally, none of which acted particularly differently despite James’s little tumble the other day. A few made teasing comments, but nothing actually judgemental or malicious. When they talked to the Longbottoms, Frank and Alice even loudly proclaimed for anyone in the vicinity to hear that there were no hard feelings. That a little accident didn’t change years of friendship between their Houses. All in all, it went pretty well.

Unfortunately, things got a little trickier when they started to branch out beyond their strong allies.

*

“Ah, a fallen angel. No pardon me— a snow angel, wasn’t it? So easy to get the two confused these days,” Lady Crabbe uttered at one point.

“I’ve been told I bear a striking resemblance to both,” James agreed good-naturedly, despite wanting to sink into the ground and disappear. Regulus quickly jumped in and changed the topic.

*

“Oh no! I seem to have dropped some icing on my robes,” Mr Parkinson said on another occasion. He turned to Regulus. “Who wore it better do you think? Me or Potter?”

Regulus’s jaw tightened, the only visible sign of his irritation. “Most definitely Potter.”

“Well, I did have commitment on my side,” James mediated with a faux laugh. He held out a napkin to Parkinson. “Head to toe frosting is more of a statement, I suppose.”

*

“I have been positively tripping over myself to speak with you!” Lucius Malfoy announced loudly at a later time. He swanned his way over, a crown of icicles adorning his platinum hair, and his wife, Narcissa, (a cousin of Regulus’s in fact) on his arm. They both looked utterly arresting, Lucius in a classic Snow King ensemble, while Narcissa had gone a little more creative. She was most assuredly an Ice Queen, given the icy diadem atop her head, but her dress was assembled entirely from small diamond-shaped mirrors stitched together. In effect, she looked like a cracked sheet of ice. A walking frozen fractal. James’s breath was taken away at the mere sight of the pair.

However, a nearby group chuckled and chortled at Lucius’s words, glancing at James and watching for his reaction. So, James forced a smile onto his face.

“Don’t go tripping and falling for me, Lord Malfoy,” James bowed his head politely, “I can attest to the fact that it’s not as fun as it looks.”

Both Malfoys sharpened their gazes, assessing him with immense scrutiny. Narcissa’s eyes were a smoky grey shade, like every other Black James had come across, whilst Lucius’s were a piercing blue colour. Both were incredibly alluring, James noted inwardly. How curious.

“We were sorry to see of your tumble,” Malfoy continued, not holding back even an inch. “Especially on such an important day.”

“I doubt anyone could forget my debut for years to come,” James replied nonchalantly. “I certainly am that memorable.”

Beside him, Regulus was biting back a smirk. “Cousin,” he greeted, moving forward. The two Blacks exchanged air kisses and greetings before Lucius reluctantly greeted Regulus in turn. At that point, Narcissa turned her attention on James.

“Memorable, indeed. Though not, perhaps, for the right reasons,” she spoke very deliberately, her tone so carefully light, it almost didn’t come across as an insult. Almost.

“I must admit,” James countered, equally careful and light. “I know I was young at the time, but I cannot for the life of me recall your debut. What colour robes did you wear? Which House hosted you? Whom did you dance with? I can’t seem to remember the details.”

Narcissa’s lip curved up in the subtlest smirk. Like he’d impressed her. “Well, not all of us can leave such a controversial impression.”

“You may not know me well…” James paused purposefully, “Yet. …But you will. I am not one to shy away from controversies. And I have no doubt that the mark I will leave in my lifetime will be entirely unforgettable to all.”

“A bold claim.” Narcissa’s eyes twinkled. It made her look radiant.

“Not a claim. A promise.”

The crowd tittered at his words.

Lucius, on the other hand, did not seem pleased. He snapped his fingers and a house elf appeared at his side, holding a small box. Lucius stooped to collect the box then sneered at the elf, “Leave.”

The elf disappeared with a sharp crack.

Now holding the small white box, Lucius straightened up and offered it out to James. His smile looked more like a baring of teeth. Dangerous and deadly. “Heir Potter. Please accept this small token of honour for your recent debut.”

James hesitated for a moment, wary of the box’s contents. It couldn’t be anything truly dangerous or Lucius wouldn’t hand it to him out in the open, with an audience to watch. But that didn’t mean it couldn’t still be damaging. Unfortunately, Lucius had presented it as a gift of honour from his House to James’s. It would be extremely impolite to refuse.

Gingerly, he took the box. “Thank you, my Lord. House Potter appreciates your honour.” He glanced sideways at Regulus and saw caution reflected in the other boy’s gaze. Still, he nodded the slightest amount, confirming that James did indeed have to open it.

Inside, lay a sliver of Victoria sponge cake.

Oh, fucking hell.

James couldn’t help but laugh.

Was it polite? Probably not. Did James care? No, not really. He reached into the box and held the small slice of cake in his fingers for the crowd to see, still laughing.

“How apt,” James giggled. He knew this was supposed to be a dig, but it was just so bizarre. Lucius Malfoy had gone out of his way to procure a slice of cake, package it appropriately, and have an elf bring it to him in the midst of the Greengrass Ball, all in an attempt to insult James. That was fucking hilarious. Commitment to the bit, if James ever saw it.

As he laughed at the cake, he wondered what he should do. He’d just been very publicly dissed. This one tiny sliver of dessert represented the assertion that James was clumsy, ineffectual, hapless, weak, and a stain on his family line. It called into question how much James deserved his position, and it marred his reputation significantly. If he couldn’t regain control of the situation, it would set back his image rehabilitation considerably.

‘You’re James Potter,’ Sirius had told him with such emphasis and zeal. Like it meant something. Like that man wassomething. If he weren’t at a ball, weren’t surrounded by polite society, what would his response be? How would James usually handle this, if it were just a prank by his friends in the Great Hall at Hogwarts?

“There’s a saying, isn’t there?” James met Lucius’s gaze head on, a bright smile on his face. “About having your cake,” he lifted the slice up as if in cheers, “and eating it too.”

With that, he took a bite of the dessert, the flavours of sugary cream and tart strawberry jam bursting on his tongue. It was quite good, actually.

James held Lucius’s gaze as he chewed up his insult and swallowed it down, finishing the cake. “Thank you again, milord. That was quite delicious.” He retrieved his wand and banished the box, never faltering in his smile.

Lucius’s eyes raged.

His wife, however, took it in good spirits. Perhaps due to the crowd of onlookers, or perhaps because James had charmed her. He doubted he would ever know.

She smiled beatifically at James. “We are glad our gift was to your tastes.”

“For future reference, I’m partial to a good treacle tart,” he quipped back mischievously.

Narcissa curtsied a farewell. “We shall keep that in mind.”

James bowed in response. “Blessed Yuletide to you both.”

“And to you.”

With more bows from Regulus and Lucius, Narcissa steered her husband away, leaving James alone with her cousin once more. Regulus smirked up at him, a glint in his eye. “Not bad, Potter. Looks like you know how to play after all.”

Something in James preened at praise from this boy. “Did you doubt me?”

“Most definitely,” Regulus shot back cruelly. “But your canines are sharper than I thought.”

“I’m going to take that as a compliment,” James decided.

For a moment, Regulus just smirked at him, eyes gleaming. They stood in comfortable silence, simply gazing at each other.

Eventually, the boy spoke. “Let’s take a break. I have a friend I’d like to greet.”

“Sure,” James agreed easily. “I’ll just grab a drink while I wait—”

“No, you’re meeting him too,” Regulus corrected. “Come on. This way.”

*

Barty Crouch Junior was apparently Regulus’s best friend, according to his introduction.

He was also, James noted in the privacy of his mind, stupidly gorgeous.

He was dressed in the vein of Jack Frost, by his own admission, wearing a sheer white shirt that showed off his slender but enticing physique. It had been paired with opaque white suit trousers and pointed shoes. With his pale blue eyes lined daringly in black kohl despite the snowy theme, his brown hair spiked up, the tips coated in white like it’d been dipped in ice, and his lips curved into a wicked smirk that sent a shiver down James’s spine, he was, all in all, like a shot of electricity to the system. An unfairly attractive one at that.

James’s mental tally was now up to four non-women whom James had recognised as attractive. Drew, Lord Greengrass, Lucius Malfoy (despite his personality), and now Crouch too. But at the same time, he’d also thought Narcissa Malfoy was beautiful too. Alongside the many women James had considered pretty in the past.

Thus far, then, Ethan’s window-shopping technique was leaning James more and more in favour of his general queerness. Of the idea that James could be attracted to any and all genders once his mind had opened up to the possibility. He was starting to wonder how he had never realised his sexuality before. It was so easy to see square masculine jawlines, and broad shoulders, and the dip of Adam’s apples along a throat, as attractive features. Features not often found upon women.

Yeah, James being straight was not looking likely.

“What, did you develop a sweet tooth in the last week?” Crouch drawled, eyeing James sceptically, and clearly referencing the cake thing again.

“It’s none of your business what I put in my mouth,” Regulus batted back, far too casually for James’s delicate constitution.

He sputtered inelegantly. “Regulus! I’m not— You haven’t—”

“Bit of a prude, is he?” Crouch raised an eyebrow at his friend.

Regulus’s grin was sharp and shark-like. “Just easily flustered. It’s rather fun, actually.”

Crouch hummed as if that was a fair reason to keep James around. “Well, far be it for me to spoil your fun. One of us should have a decent evening at least.”

“What’s your Father done now?” Regulus asked in a tight tone.

“Besides force me to attend this snooze-fest? I believe he’s attempting to set me up with Hyacinth Greengrass,” Crouch answered bitterly. He sipped from a fluted glass which James suddenly realised was alcoholic. It was mildly impressive that he’d managed to swipe that, underage as he was.

Regulus instantly frowned. “Isn’t she twenty-six?”

Crouch’s look was pointed. “Twenty-seven.”

And that… that was all kinds of messed up. Crouch was in Regulus’s year at school so he couldn’t be more than sixteen at most. Definitely not of marriageable age. Godric, not even of voting age.

“I think he’s hoping that marrying me off as quickly as possible will stop my ‘rebellious behaviour’,” the boy continued sourly. Then for James’s benefit, “He’s a dick, for context. Even if I didn’t try to purposefully piss him off all the time, he’d still take any semblance of my free will as rebellion.”

“That sucks,” James sympathised.

“Preaching to the choir, Potter.”

“What’s the plan tonight then?” Regulus prompted his friend, the words sounding familiar off his tongue, like this was a conversation they’d had countless times before.

“Well, I unfortunately can’t make myself any less pretty,” Crouch began with a small smirk, “and we all know the Greengrasses prize beauty over all else. But I can get utterly sloshed to try and turn them off.”

Regulus nodded, mulling this over. “Sloppy drunk is rarely an attractive look.”

It was a decent plan, but still, James’s prank-loving mind ran through a myriad of possibilities. There were hundreds of ways to piss off fathers and scare away suitors, and in far more creative ways than simply getting trollied.

“Any chance you’d want to cause some trouble?” James wondered aloud. “As in, shake up the evening, all eyes on you, kind of trouble?”

In synchrony, Crouch and Regulus looked at him like he’d said something stupid.

“And get killed by my Father?” Crouch raised a judgemental brow.

“Or shunned by society?” Regulus added with equal disdain.

“No thanks.”

“Your stupidity appears to be unending, Potter.”

James raised his hands in surrender. “Whatever, I was just trying to be helpful. Figured you’d wanna piss off your old man.”

This did seem to catch Crouch’s attention. “Out of curiosity, what did you have in mind?”

James met his gaze. “I was wondering if you wanted to dance with me.”

Both boys’ eyebrows shot up.

“With you?” Crouch repeated.

“With you?” Regulus gaped subtly.

James shrugged, eyes wandering off to survey the dance floor — a large clearing in the garden beside a live band, where couples were twirling together in time with the music. “I’m respectable.”

Regulus snorted.

“Respectable enough, at least,” he corrected. “I’m titled, rich, etcetera, etcetera — all that bullshit. So, what can your dad really do if we dance? He can’t stop us without causing a scene. Can’t berate me or my family without going to war with House Potter and its allies (which I know most people don’t want to do). He can’t even fault you for building connections with the Potter Heir, given our status and all that. Still — assuming he’s homophobic — he’d be pissed the fuck off, without any ability to interfere. Plus, you dancing with a bloke sends a pretty clear message of disinterest to Hyacinth and the Greengrasses at the same time. Aka: we’d cause some trouble.”

Crouch blinked at him. “That might be the smartest thing you’ve ever said. I wasn’t actually aware you had braincells until this moment.”

James perked up. “You’re reconsidering.”

“I think you’ve finally learnt to speak my language, Potter.” A slow grin spread across the boy’s face. “I’m a rather big fan of chaos and carnage.”

James grinned winningly. “Haven’t you heard? I’m a troublemaker, Crouch. Mischief is my middle name.”

“Offer me your hand, Gryffindork.” The glint in Crouch’s eye was an enticing sort of dangerous. “We’re about to make this evening a whole lot more interesting.”

James promptly held out his hand in offer of a dance. “Sure thing, Ravenprick.”

“You’re both idiots,” Regulus cut in. “This is a terrible idea. What about your reputations?”

He had a fair point, but James didn’t want to spend the rest of his life treading on eggshells in Society. He was a trouble-magnet. A political radical. And likely a queer wizard too. Shit would follow him wherever he went, and the more he cared about other people’s opinions, the more he’d come to resent the Ton. The cake debacle may have been an accident, but James was going to make waves no matter what. He planned to do as his Mum had advised and use his position to make change. Real change.

Which meant it was time to stop giving a shit about making other people uncomfortable.

“Who cares?” James dismissed, determined not to back down. Two dudes dancing together wasn’t a big deal anyway. The Ton could get over themselves.

“Not me.” Crouch gleefully took his outstretched hand and gave his drink to his friend. “Revenge is way more satisfying.”

“Then let’s dish some out.” James felt lighter than he had in hours. “See you in a bit, Regulus. We’ve got a heart attack to induce.”

“Since when were you this fun?” Crouch was grinning manically, his mood having taken a swift one-eighty.

They swept over to the dance floor with sure and confident steps, not managing at all to tamp down their smiles. Heads swivelled in their direction with shock, whispers breaking out in their wake. By the time they reached their destination, Crouch was snickering quietly, mischief practically bubbling up from his skin.

“He’s going to lose his mind,” the boy murmured giddily, largely to himself.

James was elated at Crouch’s obvious excitement. “Wanna lead or shall I?”

“Oh, there’s no way I’m letting you lead, Snotter.” Crouch snatched up his hand assuredly, placing the other at James’s waist.

The Gryffindor rolled his eyes. “Compensating Junior?”

“No, but I’ll let you take a peek if you beg pretty enough,” Crouch crooned without missing a beat.

James tossed his head back in a laugh as he put his hand on the boy’s shoulder. He affected an earnest and doe-eyed expression. “I’m afraid I’m not that kind of boy, Mister.”

The music started up and they began to dance, ignoring most of the eyes on them as they continued to banter back and forth.

“And here I thought you were the school broom,” Crouch played along.

“No, that’s you.”

“Oh right!” Crouch pretended a look like: ‘how could I forget?’ “I’m the one on my knees in the back alley.”

“Two sickle whore,” James commented faux-seriously as they twirled across the floor together. “But I’ve heard rave reviews. One even said you’re worth at least three sickles.”

“I should start a marketing campaign.”

“Cocksucker Crouch: the sloppiest blow in town.”

“Hmm. You could learn a thing or two, Jimmy-boy.” Crouch now seemed only half-joking.

“About giving head?” James frowned. “Not sure why I’d need that.”

“Oh, you’re in denial.” The Ravenclaw smirked. “I see. Let me spell it out for you: Reg has a cock, and it is in dire need of sucking.”

James sputtered for the second time in Crouch’s presence, heat racing to his cheeks as his feet fumbled the steps. “I’m— wha-er… what are you…?”

Crouch nonchalantly led him through, subtly saving his balance. “Reg was right. Flustering you is fun. Now calm your tits, Romeo, I haven’t told him about your little crush.”

“How do you know?” James managed to get out.

Crouch just raised an unimpressed brow. “You’re about as subtle as a bludger to the face.”

Shit.

“Please don’t tell him,” James requested quietly. “I haven’t even come out to my parents yet.”

Crouch spun him in time with all the ladies, the world whirling past him for a second before he found himself back in the Ravenclaw’s hold. The boy wore a neutral expression. “You ashamed or something?”

“No, no,” James rushed to assure. “It’s just so new. I’m still… I’m still trying to figure it all out.”

Crouch was silent for a moment. “How new?”

James wasn’t entirely sure. “Well, I don’t know when I started crushing on… on Regulus…” Wow, saying it out loud felt strange, “…but it only hit me during the snowball fight last week.”

Crouch’s eyebrows shot up and he blew out a breath. “Whoa. That… is new.”

They paused while they spun in opposite directions until they faced each other again.

“I’m just trying to figure out what it means for me,” James explained carefully. He debated mentioning his window-shopping but decided against it. As a loyal friend of Regulus’s, Crouch might not react well to his eyes wandering about. Instead, he said, “I don’t think it takes away from the fact that I like girls. I think I just like both — well, not at the moment. …It’s just him right now.”

The look in Crouch’s eyes told James he understood. “I like both too,” the boy admitted, barely audible.

James perked up interestedly. “Oh?”

“Yeah.”

So, it was a thing! First Ethan, now Crouch. And James too. Two might be a coincidence, but three’s a pattern. Even if there was no word for it, being queer in this way was definitely a thing. Liking people regardless of gender… it was real. James’s sexuality was real.

That was… extremely relieving to know.

Crouch’s pale blue eyes met his. “One piece of advice: just make sure you’re certain before you do anything. I’ve been there and fucked things up before — with Reg, in fact — and it was not fun.”

It was James’s turn for his brows to jump up. “You and…” He suddenly remembered Regulus’s advice not to shag one’s best friend. “Oh, that makes so much sense.”

Crouch smirked. “It’s ancient history now, and we managed to get over it, but I’m serious — don’t go there unless you’re sure.”

The music came to a close, the musicians performing a final flourish, and Crouch released James. They both took a step back and stared at each other while everyone else bowed and curtsied around them.

Truthfully, he had no intention of jumping into anything without first being sure. He just didn’t think it would be right. He might not usually be the cautious type, but Regulus was… complicated. Even if Regulus liked him back — and that was a big if — he would still have to be willing to brave Sirius’s wrath, as well as come out publicly. And if Regulus didn’t share his feelings, he had to be prepared for things to be awkward at home.

Either way, it didn’t feel like something he could be reckless about. For everyone’s sake, James knew he had to take his time and examine his feelings from all angles. He had to make sure he was ready before taking any steps. Not just about Regulus, but about his sexuality too. He wasn’t doing a great job of keeping it under wraps, but there was a world of difference between a few people knowing, and openly announcing himself as queer. James wanted to feel ready before taking the leap.

“I promise,” he said.

Crouch smiled, a genuine smile. “Good.”

They mutually bowed in thanks for the dance.

“Is my Father freaking out?” Crouch reached out to take James’s arm.

He glanced over the boy’s shoulder and caught sight of Crouch Senior practically blowing steam out of his nostrils. There was a vein throbbing violently on his temple, his jaw clenched tight, and when James made eye contact, the stem of the glass in his hand snapped.

“Oh, he’s livid,” James replied. They settled into a traditional hold, arm in arm, like a courting couple promenading in the park.

“I think this might be the best day of my life,” Crouch sounded positively gleeful, as they made their way back over to Regulus. There was another guy standing at his side — average height, ebony skin, and platinum blond twists atop his head. He wore a sharp set of ivory robes, traditional but on the youthful side, and if James wasn’t mistaken, he was glaring straight at them.

“Rosie!” Crouch greeted, beaming happily. They shook hands but James was sure they’d be hugging if they weren’t in public. “I think I’ve just discovered the perfect revenge for Senior’s latest antics.”

“I’m happy for you,” ‘Rosie’ replied, not sounding happy in the slightest. He was still sending daggers at the place where James and Crouch’s arms interlocked.

“This is Evan Rosier,” Regulus introduced, a smirk playing at his lips. “He’s a close friend of ours.”

“Crouch ‘close’? Or just friends ‘close’?” James couldn’t help but ask. Crouch coughed something that sounded suspiciously like, ‘jealous?’

Recognition flickered in Regulus’s eyes. “Finally connected those dots, have you?”

“Yeah,” he nodded. Regulus smirked but didn’t answer his question in return. James doubted he could ask again without making himself painfully obvious.

“So, Rosier,” he turned to the newcomer, holding out a hand of greeting. “Nice to meet you.”

Rosier clasped his hand and squeezed. “A pleasure,” he drawled, full of disdain.

“Strong handshake,” James commented, strained, doing his best not to cry out in pain.

The Slytherin squeezed even tighter before letting go. “Thanks.”

Relief sung through him, and James tried to flex his hand subtly, though he didn’t think it went unnoticed by his companions.

Regulus looked highly amused by the situation while Crouch seemed a touch confused. “Well, alright then. Thanks for the dance, Romeo. I’m gonna go swipe a bottle of something strong to celebrate.”

“I’ll join you,” Rosier said immediately.

It sounded like a good time, but James was fairly certain Rosier might try to push him into a rosebush if he joined. “I’ll pass. Have fun though.” He released Crouch’s arm.

“Don’t get caught,” Regulus warned fondly.

Rosier nodded, looped his own arm through Crouch’s, and steered him away quickly.

Utterly bemused, James watched them go. “Was it just me or did Rosier look like he wanted to kill me?”

Regulus bit back a laugh. “He wanted to decapitate you and put your head on a spike.”

“Why? What the fuck did I do to him?”

Grey eyes glinted evilly. “Oh, it has absolutely nothing to do with you.”

“Kinda feels like it does.”

The boy just smiled at him, entertained and utterly gorgeous, his eyes shining with mirth. “Don’t worry about it, Potter. It’s time we get back to networking anyway.”

Something caught his attention. “We?”

“Yes ‘we’,” Regulus raised a nonchalant brow. “You’d be lost without me, don’t you recall?”

It occurred to James that the boy could have started without him, but he’d waited until James was back from his dance. He’d waited for James.

“I recall,” he replied faintly.

Regulus rolled his eyes and began to walk away. “Keep up, Potter. I don’t have all day.”

James followed without hesitation.