handgun

Regulus woke up to thirty missed calls from Evan and Barty. Oops. The sunlight penetrated his windows in pieces because they’re in the middle of the forest. He can hear the birds outside, the trees rustling and someone making tea in the kitchen. He quickly freshens up, calls Evan and goes to the living room.

“Yeah, I’m with him right now….No, it’s a long story I might be here a while….”

He was talking on the phone when he saw James enter the kitchen with short shorts that should be illegal and messy hair. He temporarily zoned out as James walked towards the refrigerator while rubbing his eyes.

“Reg? Hello? You there?” Evan said, and oh right the phone call.

He could feel James eyeing him. Leaning on the countertop drinking some awfully healthy juice looking at Regulus, almost suspiciously.

“Yes, sorry, I’m safe Ev I promise, I can’t tell you anything on the phone for obvious reasons but I’ll try to come back for a while. Stay safe, yeah?“

“Of course mate-“ Evan said while Barty was making kissing sounds in the background.

“Fuck off Barty” Regulus smiled and cut the call.

He adored his best friends. They are the only two people in the world who Regulus trusts with him life. After running away, he was completely alone but he had stolen enough money to get himself a place to live. The flat was dingy and located in a very shady area but that’s where he met Evan and Barty already getting trained - Evan was their computer guy, he could get any information on anyone at any time, Regulus specialized solely in shooting, it was something that came vey naturally to him, and Barty was terribly good at everything (though no one will ever admit that).

He shifted his gaze to look at James drinking his juice straight from the carton, his throat gulping and eyes closed. He cannot be doing this in public, what the fuck?

“What?” James asked raising his eyebrow.

“Wow James, good morning to you too! Very pleasant weather we’re having today?” Regulus said with the sassiest tone he could harbour.

James groaned. “I’m not in the mood for this right now Regulus.”

No, James should always be in a mood to talk to him. So Regulus moved towards the countertop and reached out to take the juice right from James’ hand while their fingers brushed. He pushed James’ cute glasses back and put his mouth on the juice bottle. His mouth right where James’ was a minute ago. He took two sips. James eyes darkened and he could feel him go stiff. He was taller than Regulus even when he was leaning.

“What are you doing?” James whispered, breathless and so soft.

Regulus took a step forward, His body, just an inch away from James. He looked at James and licked his bottom lip.

“I like your eyes.” James said out of nowhere.

Regulus can’t breathe. “You do?”

“Yeah.” James exhaled.

“You should keep telling me things you like about me instead of pissing me off. Do you know what I do to people who piss me off, Jamie?” Regulus asked putting emphasis on each word and looking at James with dangerous eyes.

“What?” James asked, still breathless.

“I kill them.” Regulus moves forward and kisses James’ cheeks before going out of the kitchen to his room.

-

Everyone gathered to the dining table. Andromeda had made food. Regulus liked Dromeda, she was always kind to him. He talked to her about everything, and she could understand him. He could understand her. She had a daughter, Regulus found out. His heart absolutely shattered. He mentally told himself to buy every single doll and every single chocolate in the world to gift her. Dromeda’s husband and daughter were currently with Ted’s (the husband’s) parents. He also found out Dromeda actually lives in Scotland but has two houses in London too.

At the table James clapped his hand and began, “Right so good morning, let’s begin from the start shall we? The police is all over the city looking for evidence, eye witnesses- anything. No hard suspect as of now, they’re still asking for alibis from Lucius’ enemies. The attention has been diverted from Sirius as of now because the possibility of him pulling this off has been ruled out. And-“

Sirius whined, “James! I just woke up I am not listening to you give me an hour or two to get used to beings awake!”

This made Remus look at Sirius so fondly, Regulus almost puked.

“Hey! No better time than the present. You’re gonna want to hear this… Orion has taken over as CEO for the time being…”

No, there is no way. “What? He didn’t even work there! Doesn’t he have another job already?” Regulus practically screamed.

“I asked mum, she said this is what they’re planning to do- Taking over the healthcare is the perfect way to destroy the hierarchy. Apparently Orion was always older so he was kind of a figure head even before Lucius died.”

Sirius looked terrified, “but if he has access to all that medical equipment, he won’t just withhold it, he will misuse it. They are absolutely crazy- preparing a fucked up army. I don’t know where exactly the base is but it’s somewhere in the creepy forest behind Malfoy Manor.”

“We are going there… Sirius and I. Tomorrow.” Remus said.

“You fucking idiots,” Regulus began, “you both are not going there alone, the amount of murders that have happened there alone are more than the rest of London.”

Remus chuckled. “Well thank you for your concern Regulus but we have backup.” he looked at James and continued “Dorcas and Peter are meeting us there, along with weapons.”

James was still unsure. “Yes so then along us three should be enough.”

“You’re not coming Prongs” Sirius said.

Regulus got up. Enough of these people’s childish protectiveness, “We’re both coming, you’re going to need me. Trust me.”

Sirius looked at him angrily, “You’re coming nowhere.”

Regulus laughed, “Oh you think I will listen to you? I’m so sorry for giving you that impression.”

Remus seemed to have murmured something in Sirius’ ear that annoyed him. Regulus liked Remus. Sirius rolled his eyes but didn’t argue back.

“Wait so, we’re leaving tomorrow?” James asked.

“Yeah, we were going to take Andy’s old car but now we’re obviously taking Reggie’s sexy car that he bought god knows how.” Sirius said.

“I am rich, you know?” Regulus said coolly.

“Ah little Reggie and his pretentious, royal habits.”

“If you-“ Regulus started before James rudely interrupted.

“Don’t call him little Sirius.” James said looking genuinely terrified. This was amazing.

Remus looked at Regulus grinning, “What did you do to him?” and Regulus just winked.

“So I’m going to my flat to bring my gun, my tea, I have it personally sourced from Darjeeling-“

“Posh little Reggie.” Sirius said.

“-and my equipments. The usual, daggers, crossbows, poison.”

“…Right. I’m coming with you. I need to get my stuff sorted too.” James said.

Regulus rolled his eyes. “Okay James.”

-

They were in the car with an hour long drive ahead of them. James had asked to drive and Regulus made sure he never asks anything stupid like that again.

“So you play quidditch?” Regulus started the conversation, surprising himself as well.

“Uh yeah. I played. Really well too. Have you ever seen a national match? You would see me there. I’m a chaser…” he chuckled and continued, “I love quidditch you know it’s just so mind blowing how the sport unites people and when we win tournaments and stuff- It’s a feeling I can never forget. Being the captain and all. Nothing feels better than that.”

Regulus could feel James beaming like the fucking Sun making his heart so, so warm. “I wish you hadn’t quit, James.” Regulus said.

“Some things are bigger than what I want.”

“If your morals make you unhappy, should you really have them?”

“If everyone starts acting on their instincts, the world descends to chaos. It’s fine, I’m not unhappy.”

“But after this is over, you’ll play again?” Regulus asked hopefully.

“I hope so.”

“You’ll play again, I’ll kill Tom Riddle myself, don’t worry.” Regulus said expecting James to laugh. But when he looked at James, he was just staring at him with an odd expression.

“You can’t threaten to kill me and then become all sweet.” James said turning his head and looking out the window.

“Threatening murder is as sweet as I get, actually.”

James hummed. “You’re all bark no bite. I can piss you off all I want.”

Regulus scowled. “Do you really wanna risk it, Jamie?”

James chuckled, “you make me adventurous.”

What an utter idiot, Regulus thought. “Where do I drop you off?”

“Oh um I can take a cab from your flat, it’s alright.”

“Shut up James, where do you, ahem, get your ‘stuff sorted’”

James sighed, “I’ll put it on maps.”

“This where you and Sirius live?” Regulus asked.

“No actually Lily lives here, she has my things from the Academy, I have to collect them.”

Lily? Lily friend? Lily girlfriend? Lily cousin? Lily? “Lily?” Regulus couldn’t help but ask.

“Yeah, you’ll like her actually now that I think about it.”

James, the daft idiot he is, would not tell Regulus more than this. There was a sinking feeling in Regulus’ gut. The rest of the carride was silent.

“So I’ll just take five minutes, only have to get my stuff, will you come with me?” James asked as soon as they reached.

Regulus shaked his head, “No, please, I’ll wait here.”

James looked like he wanted to protest but decided not to. He went into the building.

Regulus opened the glove box of his car to take a pack of cigarettes out, rolled down his window and lit one up. He doesn’t remember exactly when he started smoking but it’s safe to say he can never stop now. It’s not a habit, but it’s rather pleasant and satisfying to him. He connected his phone on the aux and started playing his playlist.

No one knows what it's like

To be the bad man

To be the sad man

Behind blue eyes

And no one knows what it's like

To be hated

To be fated to telling only lies

But my dreams they aren't as empty

As my conscience seems to be

I have hours, only lonely

My love is vengeance

That's never free

James came as he had gone, but his hair seemed ruffled, he was carrying a bag in each hand. Behind him was a beautiful woman with gorgeous red hair and very kind eyes.

“He looks just like Sirius!” she exclaimed.

“Err not really, I don’t see it.” James replied.

The woman walks up to Regulus in the car, smoking with windows down.

“Hello! I’m Lily.”

Oh right. Of course.

Slightly flustered and confused Regulus replied, “Hey uh- I’m Regulus.”

“So I’ve gathered.” She smirked.

“You know Sirius?”

“Yes well- do you know Remus?”

“Yeah he’s hot.” Regulus says dismissively leaning back on his seat. Lily seemed nice.

“You dog! That’s Sirius’ boyfriend!”

“God knows how.”

Lily laughed, Regulus bit back a smile, “Well Remus is my bestfriend.”

“What’s so funny?” James screamed from behind the car, probably putting his bags in the trunk.

“Regulus thinks Remus’ hot.” Lily replied.

James walked back to the front of the car and stood next to Lily. “Well, do you know he once ate twenty three bars of chocolate in one day?”

Regulus raised his eyebrow, what was James trying to do? “Can’t blame him, chocolate is fucking amazing. My second favourite thing to take in mouth.” Regulus replied.

“What- What’s the first?”

Lily swatted James on his arm. “It’s an obvious set up, you idiot.” She rolled her eyes.

James still looked confused so Regulus answered, “Dick, James…dick.”

Lily laughed while James looked embarrassed. It was amazing. “Okay you two continue, nice to meet ya Regulus.” Lily said.

“Likewise, Lily.”

Regulus saw James walk Lily back to her building, he hugged her and she kissed him on the cheek. Alright. That doesn’t help.

“So…girlfriend?” Regulus asked bluntly when James sat back in the car.

“Uh what. Lily?” James asked.

“Yeah, is she your girlfriend?”

“Oh no…” he paused, “not for the lack of trying though, I’ve been trying to go out with her since months, she never says yes.” James said sounding surprisingly okay for someone speaking about constantly getting rejected.

Regulus was not okay though. Is James straight? Even if he’s not, James likes Lily. How can Lily say no to James? His heart feels like it has been sculpted personally by angels, the way he smiles can brighten anyone’s day and he is just really, true to god, so fucking hot.

“Regulus?” James asked pulling Regulus back from his dangerous train of thought.

“Yes?”

“I asked if you smoke.”

“What do you think?” Regulus asked blowing smoke out.

James rolled his eyes.

“Do you smoke?” Regulus asked.

“N-No. I’d like to try though.”

This made Regulus look at James. No one who wants to try smoking is okay. “Got your stuff back?”

James closed his eyes, he looked sad. No please. “It was awful.”

“Let’s get out and go to that park.” Regulus said pointing to a park that was isolated because it was mid December.

They both got out and went to sit on a bench. James sat with his hands on his knees, palms on his eyes like he had been when he was worried about Sirius.

“Hey James.” Regulus poked his shoulder. “Come on take a drag.” he held out his cigarette.

James looked up and nodded. But, instead of lighting up another cigarette, Regulus took his own and brought it near James’ lips. James looked unsure but he opened his gentle lips and took the cigarette in. He breathed in and exhaled smoke easily, throwing his head back and looking at the sky.

“How did you not cough?”

“I’ve smoked before but just once.”

Regulus hummed. He was a little worried about James. Scratch that, he would burn down anything or anyone that made James upset. He needed to comfort James. Immediately. He tentatively put his hand on top of his. “Hey, what happened?” he asked.

James looked scared. He sat there in silence for a minute as if he was trying to get his words out, but couldn’t. After seemingly lot of contemplation, he began.

“Uh, we had a teacher- back in school. We were very close to her, Sirius and I. She was so fucking tired of us getting in trouble but she always cared for us.” He chuckled sadly, “she was in New York a week ago.” his voice cracked and his eyes were glassy.

Oh god, from all Regulus knew, a bomb had gone off in a building in New York, it had a lot of important diplomats. It was definitely pulled off by Tom Riddle.

James continued, “The bomb went off. She-” he shut his eyes, “I don’t have the heart to tell Sirius, he’s already on edge, he’s going to do something impulsive, Reg…But how do I live with this alone?” he opened his eyes and looked at Regulus.

His eyes were red and his hair was ruffled. His beautiful lips were frowning and nose was red too. His glasses slightly tilted, like they always are. God, he looked beautiful.

Regulus took James’ hand in both of his and moved closer. “You’re not alone” he said, so quietly. Regulus wasn’t sure if he had said anything this softly before. “I’m sorry James, I’m…I know how you feel. It’s horrible but you weren’t obligated to tell, yeah? The situation didn’t call for it, yes he might get mad when you tell him-“ James frowned, “-but you knew what’s better, yeah?”

“I have to tell him now, you know.”

Regulus sighed, “I know.”

James was frowning and Regulus hated that. Without thinking, he gently raised his hand and put his index finger right on top of James’ bottom lip. James blinked, confused. His lips parted slightly. Regulus couldn’t breathe. “You won’t be alone, I’ll make sure of it.”

James took the hand from near his lips to put Regulus’ palm right on his own cheek. James leaned into the touch and closed his eyes, breathing in. They stayed like this for a while, with James finding comfort in Regulus’ touch and Regulus finding everything looking at James.

He was the warmth in cold December. And…he liked Lily. Remembering that, Regulus cleared his throat and James’ eyes shot open. “We should get back.” Regulus said. James nodded.

They walked back and drove to Regulus’ flat in silence. It took Regulus about ten minutes to gather all his ‘equipment,’ he thanked god that Evan and Barty weren’t home. He left a note for them saying “Safe and Sexy - text later.” on the fridge.

Soon enough, James and Regulus were driving back to Sirius. As they were getting closer Regulus had to break the silence, “When’ll you tell him?”

“When we reach.” James’ tone sounded slightly cold making Regulus uneasy.

“Right.”

They didn’t speak after that.

-

After reaching and settling down, they all gathered in Andy’s living room after dinner thought Andy wasn’t home, she had to visit a friend.

“Hey Padfoot, can I talk to you?” James asked.

Regulus’ eyes snapped to James but it seemed like James was avoiding eye contact with him. Fucking fine.

“Yeah sure love, what’s up?” Sirius asked.

“Come with me outside for a minute,” Remus eyed James suspiciously, “Uh Moony, you too.”

Both of them looked extremely worried. Regulus was still looking at James and James was not looking back. Just as James was going for the door, Regulus grabbed James’ arm and James startled. But he turned towards him. He still wouldn’t look at Regulus though. Regulus sighed, dropped his hand and walked back to the couch. Fuck this. He didn’t realize Sirius and Remus were looking at them until he saw Remus giving him a look.

Tired and a little dejected, Regulus went back to his room as the boys went to talk. Was James okay? Was Sirius mad? Oh god, was Sirius okay? When did he start caring so much? Why did he start caring so much? He fell on his bed head first and just lied there.

He didn’t realize he had fallen asleep until a knock on the door woke him up. It was midnight, it had been two hours. Everyone probably knew now. It made Regulus very anxious. He didn’t reply to the knock.

“Right, I’m coming in anyway.” Remus. Why was Remus here?

Remus walked in with a small smile and tired eyes, he settled down on the foot of Regulus’ bed. “He likes Lily.” Remus said.

Oh my god what the fuck. Regulus’ heart started beating faster. “Don’t know what you’re talking about. She’s nice though, I met her.” Regulus replied, his voice thick.

“Yeah, she texted me. She thinks you’re cute.”

“I’m not cute! I kill people for a living!” Regulus said angrily.

Remus chuckled. Remus was nice. “Last I know, he liked her. Lily doesn’t like him though.”

“I don’t care.”

“Sure. Anyway, he had his reasons but Sirius is upset.”

“I don’t understand how that concerns me.”

“Don’t bother lying to me, you Blacks all have the same lying face.”

Regulus sighed. “Let’s go take care of my brother.” he rolled his eyes.

Both of them went up to Sirius and Remus’ room, James was nowhere to be seen. Sirius was standing by the window, staring outside.

“Siri?” Regulus asked.

Perhaps it was the name or the softness of Regulus’ voice, but Sirius turned to face him immediately. Regulus has seen Sirius sad a lot of times, he knows how Sirius looks when he’s hurt deep to his core. He was. At home whenever Sirius was hurt, Regulus didn’t say anything, he has always been bad with words. He used to slide into Sirius’ arms and hug him into being okay. He did exactly that. It was so different, yet exactly the same.

Regulus and Sirius were about the same height now. Yet, Regulus felt like a baby in his arms. He hugged him until Sirius buried his head in Regulus’ neck and cried and cried and cried. Regulus comfortingly rubbed his back. “It’s okay, I’m here.” he murmured.

Remus was watching them both with a very calm expression.

Sirius finally looked up to Regulus, “Oh fuck, you’ve actually grown.” He sounded devastated.

Regulus chuckled.

Sirius frowned deeper. “I missed it.” he whispered.

“Doesn’t matter.” Regulus said but Sirius ignored it. Regulus looked into Sirius’ eyes, “Doesn’t. Matter. Okay?” Sirius nodded.

“Are you gonna tell me there is no use dwelling on the past?” Sirius asked.

“Don’t make me make sense, just take the message!”

“My Reggie, all mature and sensible.”

“I kill people, why aren’t you lot scared of me?”

“I’m not even disappointed.”

Regulus smiled. “I’ll kill Tom Riddle” he said, after a while.

“Not if I do it first.” Sirius said, with so much conviction.

“Don’t be mad at James.” Regulus said.

Sirius stiffened.

Regulus continued, “You realize he is just as devastated? You left right when the news came, he must’ve been so alone Siri. He is angry too, he quit quidditch for fucks sake.”

Sirius’ eyes widened, “Oh my god, he mustve been so alone!” His eyes watered up. “Shit fuck. Shit I need to go to him.” Sirius said, standing up.

“Go.” Regulus urged. When Sirius was out, Regulus looked at Remus.

“He missed you everyday.” Remus said, shaking his head.

His heart hurt. “I-“

“It’s okay. So, how did you start liking our James?”

Regulus blinked. “I don’t. Really. He’s just hot, I suppose.” Regulus looked away.

“No, that’s what I am to you.”

Regulus gasped, “Lily told you!”

Remus snickered, “I’m flattered actually. Go to sleep, Regulus. Take care, yeah?”

“Yeah, yeah. Goodnight Remus.”

“G’night.”