handgun

Regulus was annoyed. Walking back to his flat with James Potter was a bad idea. “Potter I am going to say this one more time.”

James looked down and scoffed. “I know you are doing something shady that gets you access to cameras but all I’m asking is if it’s legal.”

“Don’t ask questions you don’t want answers to.” replied Regulus monotonously. “Does it matter? We’re gonna find Sirius, you’ll get him and then we’re done. You’re not getting in trouble.”

“But what about you?” James asked, genuinely, so genuinely.

“I never get in trouble.”

“Why do you want to find Sirius?”

Regulus turned and looked at James. “He’s my brother.”

“Like you care for that.”

Ouch. He cares so much. “I don’t” Regulus said dismissively. “I just don’t want him to die.”

-

They reached the flat and he rang the doorbell.

“Reggie thank god you’re here! Please tell Evan that I did not break his beloved vase-“ Barty’s eyes diverted to James, “Oh! I understand the appeal Reg, I really do, but picking up a boy the day you kill a CEO isn’t-“

Regulus shoved Barty inside and slapped a hand on his mouth. “You fucking idiot what if he had been a cop?”

Barty bit Regulus’ hand. “He’s much too puppy-looking for that.”

“Regulus what the fuck?” James said, still standing near the door. His eyes turned on the news playing. He probably heard Barty.

“Shut up James.”
He went to the kitchen to Evan. “Find Sirius for me, please.”

“Ah! Are you finally reuniting with the mysterious big bro? We’ve been telling you that since forever!” Evan said happily.

Regulus took a deep breath and pulled Evan to the side. Evan seemed to caught on to the fact that Regulus is being genuine. “Evan you’re the only one who knows how much I care for him” Evan nodded. “He’s in trouble, real fucked up shit. And he’s missing. I need your help. I cannot let anything happen to him. Not when I’m alive.”

“Of course Reg. Text me his picture and his full name I’ll connect the computer. We’ll find him, love.”

Regulus smiled. Small and sad. “Thank you. Oh and I kind of found Sirius’ best friend on my way and picked him up….”

“Picked him up?” Evan snickered. “Is Sirius’ bestfriend a puppy?”

“Close enough. He’s his ‘real brother’ I suppose. It looked like he’d been kicked in the nuts when he talked about Sirius missing.”

“CEO killer in the day, lover boy in the night.” Evan winked and left the room.

-

When Regulus walked back into the room he saw Barty showing James his spiderman comic collection and James beaming like he had just found god. He had a glint in his eyes at all times, as if he were the Sun.

“Evan is looking for Sirius.” Regulus said. James stopped beaming. He looked almost scared. That wasn’t nice.

So Regulus continued, “James, when was the last time you saw him?”

“About two weeks ago, he was with Moony- uh, his boyfriend- and he looked happy. He genuinely looked happy, Regulus. I remember looking at him and thinking I’m so grateful that he found love. And then the next day I didn’t see him, I called him and he didn’t pick up. So I went to his flat, he wasn’t there. Nor was Moony. I looked for him everywhere.” His voice cracked at the end. Regulus’ heart clenched.

“Hey, he still works for the Order right?”

James eyes widened but he nodded.

“Did you ask…the guy with the eye?”

“Yeah.” James sounded defeated. “Sirius had some pretty hard accusations against him. Moody said he probably fled.”

“Bullshit.”

“I texted you his coordinates.” Evan said to Regulus walking out of his room.

“Love you Ev” Regulus replied.

-

Regulus slung the bagpack with fake monopoly money on his shoulder and took his car keys.

James looked lost. For a second Regulus wanted to tell him everything. He’s never had this urge before.

So he crouched down in front of James who was sitting on the couch with his palms on his eyes. Regulus gingerly took both of his wrists in his hands and removed them from his eyes. And when James looked at him, Regulus felt seen. Brown eyes, golden eyes, kind eyes, beautiful eyes.

“We’ll find him, James. Don’t you worry.” Regulus said softly.

“I’m sorry I don’t understand this. You. I don’t want you to give me hope. Why do you suddenly care about Sirius?” He didn’t sound angry, he sounded exhausted.

“I’ve always cared James. When the Order couldn’t catch Yaxley in Florence three years ago, I found him and left him to Sirius. When Dolohov had escaped, I caught him and put him back two years ago. When I heard Lucius threatening to get him killed, I killed him. I care, James.” Regulus has no idea why he told James any of it. It was some sort of an instinct to never lie to this boy.

James breathing became staggered. “You killed someone?”

“I’m an assassin, James.”

First thing Regulus noticed was that James wasn’t scared of this. He just stared at Regulus. Second thing he noticed was that James was somehow visibly relieved. The glint in his eyes mocked Regulus because it was the most beautiful thing in the world. “Let’s go.”

-

Regulus and James drove to the coordinates. The sun had set and it was cold now. The car ride was quiet for the most part.

“Why did you say you hate me?” James asked.

“I did. I still do. I’ll resume hating you after we find Sirius, can’t kick a man when he’s already down.”

James grinned. Fuck. “Okay” He chuckled. “You looked like Sirius with your mask but now you don’t.”

Regulus was curious. “How so?”

“Sirius has longer hair, a bit darker eyes, your lips are redder and you’re tinier.”

Okay enough. Regulus stopped the car. They were about a three minute walk away. “Get out. Walk straight until you find me. Don’t ever call me tiny again.”

James laughed. Regulus looked at him with rage.

“What? Are you serious?” James laughed. Butterflies. “Oh my god you’re so petty.” He got out of the car laughing and shaking his head.

Regulus drove further and let himself smile too. He reached near Sirius’ coordinates and stopped near a wooden cottage that he could vaguely recognise. When he saw James approaching he felt a bit guilty. James’ cheeks were red. Gross. Adorable. And he looked cold, he was rubbing his palms together. The Sun shouldn’t be cold.

So Regulus walked towards him and put his warm hands on James’ cheeks. James blinked. Regulus had never been warm, emotionally or physically but somehow he was. Regulus is warm only when James is cold.

“Don’t ever call me tiny again” Regulus said.

“But you are!” James said and grinned. Again.

Regulus pinched James cheeks, took his hand and went to the cottage.