heart to heart

The scents and sounds of her fellow students clogged Hermione's ears and nose as she approached the Great Hall, causing a near-instant headache in her temple. She'd have to do some research to see if there was a spell she could learn or a potion she could brew to help curb her new enhanced senses. Her evening with Professor Snape hung heavily in her mind, most notably his reaction to her revealing her heritage to him. He hadn't spoken to her after that, merely silently escorting her back to her dormitory before stalking off before she could truly say anything. It had kept her awake most of the night, the expression he wore when she told him that Sirius was her uncle and how he almost seemed repulsed by her after that. Her inner Veela sorrowed, wanting to do anything it could to make things right with the man in question, while Hermione was merely confused. 

Did he react that way due to his hatred for Sirius or because of something else entirely? 

Hermione knew that he would have been a student at Hogwarts while both her biological mother and father were there, so he might have known them. Especially with both Professor Snape and Regulus' indoctrination into the Death Eater ranks being around the same time. Had they been friends? Or merely collaborators beneath the Dark Lord, intrinsically and unknowingly bound by Regulus' daughter?

She wouldn't know anything about their relationship, whether there even was one or not, without asking the professor in question, so Hermione forced those thoughts from her mind. Sirius may have answers, but she didn't want to provoke him by asking about Professor Snape, she shuddered at the mere thought of having to explain their... connection to her uncle. Preferably, she wouldn't have to if she had her way; she'd be able to find a way to nulify the mate bond between herself and the Potions professor, but luck hadn't been on her side so far, so she was sure it wouldn't be in the future either. 

The world seemingly shifted once she entered the Great Hall, the attention of every last student and faculty member on her in a moment. The weight of the eyes on her felt as though they were boring holes into her skin as she walked, a hush falling momentarily over the room. She looked up at the teacher's table, and the absence of a certain dark-haired wizard made her heart sink. Hermione had expected the stares, had expected the silent judging by her peers, but the silence set her on edge. The incident in Potions, when she came into her inheritance must have spread like wildfire throughout the school, and her absence from all meals and classes yesterday simply must have fanned the already roaring flames. 

Finding her seat at the Gryffindor table, nestling herself between two uncharacteristically silent Weasley siblings, Hermione felt paranoia bubble up in her chest as her heart began to beat harder in her chest. At the best of times, she didn't enjoy being stared at, but it tended to come with the territory of being best friends with the Boy Who Lived. Those stares, however, tended to be reserved for the boy in question, and she just happened to be within an onlooker's line of sight while these were expressly meant for her and her alone. Was it because she looked different due to her Veela inheritance? Hermione didn't think that the physical changes her body underwent were visible at large distances; rather, they were subtle things someone could notice if they were close to her, but perhaps she was wrong. 

"You alright?" Ginny asked as she grabbed Hermione's hand under the table. 

The touch of her friend's hand against hers felt wrong, as if she had begun to rub sandpaper against the skin that Ginny's hand was in contact with, and Hermione couldn't help the grimace that flitted across her face. It seemed as if the sensation was a completely one-sided one, as Ginny merely continued to look at her with a worried look in her eyes, with no signs of discomfort in them. Was this also a new side-effect of being a Veela, finding the touch of others that aren't her mate to be bordering on painful? While Hermione wasn't the most tactile person in the world, her closest friends were no strangers to platonic physical intimacy such as hugging or hand-holding, and she, over the years, had learned to enjoy those moments with them. 

Despite this, Hermione forced a nod as conversations began to resume around them. Taking in a deep breath, Hermione tried to will her heart to slow down, but to no avail. She would be fine in time, Hermione knew, but for now, she would have to pretend to not worry her already worried friends. Ginny squeezed her hand once more in a silent show of support before withdrawing her hand from Hermione's. Despite Ginny's hand being gone, Hermione found immense comfort in the scents of her three friends enveloping her the longer she sat down at the Gryffindor table with them. The familiar scents smelled like home to her, a testament to their familial-like friendships, and she could slowly feel herself begin to relax once more. 

"How's your new dormitory?" Harry asked quietly, to not alert other Gryffindors of her new living arrangements. 

She was sure that all of Gryffindor house knew that she was no longer residing within the tower, with all of her things gone from the Eighth Year Girls dormitory and her not having been seen in the tower for a number of days now. Along with Lavender Brown's knack for gossiping, Hermione wouldn't be shocked if half the school also knew by now. Despite all of this, Hermione deeply appreciated Harry's apparent desire to be subtle. He knew firsthand what it was like for people to want to invade his privacy, so she was sure that he didn't want that for her. The closest Gryffindors at the table to them were a decent way down the table, however, so Hermione would be shocked if they were able to hear their conversation clearly with all of the other conversations taking place in the Great Hall.

"It's okay, definitely not the same as Gryffindor tower though" Hermione says with a small frown. 

"I'm sure we can sneak you back up soon, what McGonagall doesn't know won't kill her," Ron says between mouthfuls of food, "You don't belong down in the dungeons"

Hermione gives Ron a weak smile, not wanting to tell him that everyone would be better off if she were to remain in her single dormitory. There was no telling if she'd always have the amount of self-control that she does now, given how little she's been able to research her condition, and she would never be able to forgive herself if she accidentally hurt anyone due to her carelessness. Professor McGonagall hadn't said anything that would bar her from visiting Gryffindor Tower anyway, just that she would no longer be a resident of it. 

She grabbed a piece of toast from the center of the table, knowing that although she wasn't hungry, she needed to eat something. Despite the majority of the room no longer staring at her, Hermione could feel the occasional stare from her fellow students burning the back of her head. She could see even her fellow Gryffindors peering at her through the corner of her eyes, some of whom she had been friends with in the past. Would they begin to treat her differently as well as blatantly stare at her? She refused to turn around to meet their stares, refused to show to anyone that the attention unsettled her and that she wished for it to all just go away. 

"They're staring because you kind of look different" Ginny adds, as if she was reading Hermione's mind. 

"Different?" Hermione asks with an arched brow, taking a small bite out of her toast after. 

"Yeah, well not super different, just prettier, I guess. Not that you weren't pretty before, of course, but just more so now. It's hard to explain, sorry" Ginny said, her inability to completely verbalize what she meant clear as she explained. 

Hermione slowly nods. 

Could this be because of her new Veela allure? She vividly remembered meeting Fleur for the first time, despite not being entranced by her, Hermione had to admit that she was one of the most beautiful people that she'd ever met. Was that now how other people would view her, until they learned of her status as a Veela? She knew, based on some things she had read back when she learned that Fleur was part-Veela, that blood relatives would also not be affected by the allure, as well as those not attracted to women. 

"Veela allure, I think is what it's called. That's the same reason everyone was obsessed with Fleur during the Triwizard Tournament" Hermione quickly explained. 

The three of her friends nod, quietly absorbing the information. Hermione was just glad that the three of them were taking all of this as well as they were, as she assumed that it was also a lot for them to wrap their minds around. Her Veela status didn't change who she was, the young woman that they'd known all these years, but many other witches and wizards would see it differently and would view her differently because of it. 

"Have you wrote to Sirius?" Harry asks after a few moments. 

"Yes, I sent him a letter yesterday" Hermione answered honestly.

Should she tell them that Professor Snape accompanied her to the Owlry the night before? They already know that he's her mate, whether they're happy about that or not, Hermione hadn't dared to ask, although she's pretty sure that she knows the answer, but was it the right time to bring it up? 

"Did you tell him about the whole... inheritance thing?" Ron asks in a slight whisper. 

"I hinted at it. I didn't want to write everything down, just in case" Hermione said. 

Hermione doubted that the Ministry was still doing it, with the war being over and all, but it wasn't that long ago that all letters going in and out of Hogwarts were being either read or closely monitored by Ministry employees. Just in case that were to happen, or the letter somehow fall into the wrong hands, Hermione didn't want to write about her newfound Veela status explicitly. Especially since Sirius may have no idea about the Travers family inheritance, she didn't want to share a secret that didn't belong to just her. She was hoping that Sirius would at least, if he didn't know about the Veela blood running through the descendants of the Travers family line, he'd be able to put Hermione into contact with some of her maternal relatives. 

If she even has any, that is. 

"He'll write back soon, I'm sure of it" Harry says, giving her a reassuring smile. 

~*~

Sirius did, in fact, write back to Hermione quickly. His letter, sealed in a dark envelope closed with the red wax seal with the Black family crest, carried back to the castle by Virgil, was dropped in Hermione's lap at lunch the very same day. The Great Hall seemed different than it had that morning, with most of the students not paying Hermione any mind, which was in stark contrast to how they had treated her mere hours before, but Hermione didn't complain. However, the continued absence of the Potions professor was something that Hermione, without fully realizing it, had noticed. 

What if Sirius knew nothing about the Travers family inheritance and now she had to explain everything that had happened to him? 

Pushing those thoughts to the side, Hermione allowed for the cover of normalcy in the room around her to hide her internal panic when she began to open her paternal uncle's letter. Ignoring the curious looks from Harry, Ron, Ginny, and the numerous Gryffindor onlookers who had seen Hermione receive the letter, she pulled the thin piece of parchment out of the envelope with shaking hands. Thank Merlin he had decided against sending a Howler, Hermione thought for a moment, before she read the letter as she pulled it close to herself.

Dear Hermione,

I can make arrangements to be in Hogsmeade this entire weekend, I'll rent a room at The Three Broomsticks so you can come either, or both, days. Feel free to bring Harry and the others with you if you're comfortable with them being there for that conversation. Remus, Tonks, and the baby will be in the area this weekend as well. I believe I know of the inheritance of which you speak. If I'm not mistaken, your mother had mentioned it to me during our time at Hogwarts. It isn't a very well-kept secret among pureblood circles either, if I remember correctly. I most likely won't have all the answers you need, so I'll see if I can't find where some of her surviving family is in the meantime. Remus may also be able to help you, in regards to self-control. We can talk more this weekend.

Sirius

Silently, and ignoring the pressing looks from Harry, Ron, and Ginny, Hermione quickly refolds the parchment and puts it back in the envelope. With still shaky hands, Hermione slid the envelope into her bag. 

Surviving family.

There was a chance that she had some members of her maternal side of the family still out there somewhere, even if they were as distant as a cousin. Hermione knew that she shouldn't get her hopes up, that more likely than not, Sirius was the closest biological family member that she still had, but deep down, she was hoping that some of her biological mother's close relatives were still alive. She could learn all she wanted about Regulus and other members of the Black family from Sirius and his surviving cousins, but no one could tell her about her mother or her mother's family. Knowing that Remus and Tonks, along with the baby, will be in the area this weekend adds conflicting layers of comfort and anxiety to her mind. Being a fellow magical creature himself, Hermione was sure that Remus would be able to give her some helpful advice on how to acclimate to the world around her, but did she want both him and Tonks knowing her status?

"Are you okay, 'Mione?" Harry murmured from his seat next to her. 

"I think so. Sirius is going to be in Hogsmeade this weekend, if you three want to come with me when I go" Hermione says, looking between her three friends with a bordering on pleading look in her eyes. 

She wanted, or maybe needed, them to go with her. Despite all of them having their own biological families, the four of them had formed a small family of their own over the years, and Hermione didn't know if she could go through all of this without them by her side. Harry and Ron have long been the brothers that she never had growing up, with Ginny being the little sister that she had always wanted as a child. 

"Are you sure?" Ron asks.

"Of course, I don't want to do this without you guys" Hermione confessed. 

"We'd love to go with you, Hermione. Will Sirius be okay with it?" Ginny asked, looking between her boyfriend and Hermione for some sign of confirmation. 

"He'll be fine with it, said so in the letter" Hermione says, motioning to the envelope in her bag. 

"Good, I mean we'd go with you anyway, but good" Ron says with a small laugh. 

"Remus, Tonks, and the baby will be around too, Sirius said" Hermione says with a small smile. 

"Remus is good at giving advice, Hermione. I'm sure he'll be able to tell you some useful stuff" Harry says.

"It'll just be nice to see everyone" Hermione replied. 

Silence fell between the four of them then, comfortably filling the space between the four Gryffindors as they remained at the table. Laughter could be heard from all parts of the Great Hall, from all of the houses, and Hermione allowed for herself to relish in the moment. For too long, the only thing on her mind, as well as everyone else's, was survival, so the least that they all deserved was to be safe and happy amongst their peers. Memories from the war still festered in her mind, as she assumed they did in everyone else's minds as well, but the Wizarding World was beginning to heal. Even if things were to never go back to what they used to be, they could at least strive to be better than ever before. 

"Are you gonna tell Sirius about... about Snape?" Ron asks in a rushed whisper. 

"That wouldn't be a great idea" Harry adds. 

"I know that, Harry, and probably not" Hermione said. 

The strained relationship, if one could even call it that, between Sirius and Professor Snape has been known to them since their Third Year, ever since that time in the Shrieking Shack. Their forced interactions due to their allegiance to the Order made their distaste for each other no less apparent either. Hermione didn't want to add to their mutual dislike of each other, despite Hermione and the professor's current circumstances being outside of anyone's control. She knows Sirius well enough to know that he'd make it into something that it isn't, whether out of familial protectiveness or his sheer dislike for Professor Snape, to be the reason for a fight between the two of them. After seeing the memories that Professor Snape had left for Harry, it was clear that the Maruaders had bullied the professor throughout their years at Hogwarts, and it seemed that both of the remaining wizards were adamant on not letting the other one forget it.

"Why not? He'll find out eventually" Ginny asks with an arched brow. 

"I'd rather cross that bridge when we get there, Gin" Hermione shrugs. 

"We all know what he's going to think, 'Mione, and I can't necessarily say I would disagree" Harry says with a small frown on his face. 

"What do you mean?" Hermione asks.

Hermione wasn't naive enough to think that Harry would be supportive of her connection with Professor Snape, that anyone in her life would be really, but there wasn't anything between the two of them apart from their mate bond. If the Potions professor wanted nothing to do with Hermione after she graduated from Hogwarts, she wasn't going to force herself upon him, regardless of the repercussions that she'd face; that simply just isn't who she is. But it was becoming increasingly difficult to differentiate between the inner Veela in the back of her mind begging to be with Professor Snape at all times and her own curiosity regarding what the bond entails. 

"Well, y'know, it's Snape, Hermione, what else is there to say? Not to mention he's old enough to be your father" Harry explains, clearly trying to be delicate in his response. 

Anger that Hermione recognizes as not being her own winds its way throughout her body, thrumming in veins and pooling in her chest. Her embarrassment colored her cheeks, however, as she battled with the foreign anger in her mind. The Veela part of her mind was screaming at her to do something, that regardless of who Harry was to her, the slight against her mate was not to be tolerated. The rational part of her mind understood where Harry was coming from, as those were thoughts that she'd had herself numerous times because he wasn't wrong. She knew that Professor Snape was not necessarily a kind man, and he had spent most of her adolescent years being almost as much a bully to her as Malfoy had been, and that he was indeed old enough to be her father. He also possessed a great love for Harry's deceased mother, Lily Evans Potter, during his youth, and based on the memories Hermione had seen, it seems as though that love has yet to diminish with time. 

But she couldn't find the words to agree with Harry, her throat feeling as though it had closed up when she opened her mouth to speak. Would their bond not allow her to speak her mind about him? Or was she simply too embarrassed about the situation, and her body decided to silence itself?

"It's not like she can control who her mate is, Harry, it doesn't work like that" Ginny defends Hermione, giving the older girl a small smile. 

"It's a magic thing," Ron adds, "Bill told me about it before the wedding"

"Obviously, it's a magic thing, Ron, but what type of magic thing?" Harry asks sarcastically. 

What had caused Ron to talk to Bill about his mate bond with Fleur? And why hadn't he brought that up sooner than right now?

"Something about each partner's magic complimenting the other, or something like that. He didn't fully know either. 'Mione, you should reach out to Fleur and ask her about it" Ron suggests with a shrug. 

Is that all their connection boiled down to, their magic being fundamentally compatible? Hermione was forever forced to intrinsically yearn for Professor Snape due to something as simple as that? It made sense, somehow, to Hermione as what else would connect them? Their personalities, from what she's seen from Professor Snapes anyway, didn't necessarily work together, and they were from different houses, different generations nearly as well. 

"That's a good idea, Fleur must know everything there is to know on this sort of stuff" Ginny says in agreement with her brother. 

"Or Remus, when we see him this weekend. He and Tonks are mates after all" Harry asserted. 

All Hermione could do was nod, her thoughts jumbled and headed in a thousand different directions.

Would it make more sense to reach out to Fleur, who was a Veela like herself, and ask all of these questions, or to reach out to Remus, who, despite being a werewolf, has also met his mate? Fleur would be able to relate directly to Hermione's plight, as she had already gone through what Hermione was currently experiencing, but did Hermione want her to know about her Veela status? She knows that she wouldn't be met with harsh judgement and criticism by her, or by Bill, but was she ready to claim being a Veela to more than the closest people to her and those who had been there when she came into her inheritance? She would be able to get more answers from Fleur, Hermione was sure of that, about her specific situation, but she also knew that asking Remus for help wouldn't be a bad idea. 

The notion of werewolves, and by association their mates, was more commonly known than that of Veelas, so maybe Remus has more information on the topic in general than Fleur does. Being the mate and husband of her paternal cousin Tonks- not that she knew of their familiar connection yet- and being someone that Hermione implicitly trusted made her more apt to seek out Remus for help. She could also seek out help from both Fleur and Remus, sending a letter to the former while asking the latter for advice when they see each other sometime over the weekend. 

"Or we can research it together, we're with you whatever you decide to do" Ron said, looking at her from across the table with a small smile. 

"Thanks, guys, it means a lot" Hermione says, giving him a small smile.

"Love you, 'Mione" Harry says, nudging her lightly with his elbow.

Saying that, a quick 'Love you' or 'I love you' had become commonplace amongst their group after the war ended. The war put a lot of things in perspective for many people, including them, and none of them wanted to go through life without expressing how much they cared for their friends. They'd said it to each other a couple of times going through Hogwarts together, but now that they knew that they truly could lose someone in an instant, they didn't waste time expressing their platonic love for each other. They were the family that had stuck by her side, that fully understood her for who she is and that she could be herself with, and she didn't want to not tell them how much she cared about each of them. 

"Love you too, all three of you" Hermione says softly. 

As long as she had the three of them, Hermione could get through anything.