Don't drink and drive.
Well this is.. awkward
Regulus is sat in a French restaurant with Luna on his lap. He's at the head of the table, the seat to his left is Luna's and the one to his right is Harry's.
Beside Luna's chair is Evan and then Barty, and Lily and Pandora are sat beside Harry. Dorcas is at the foot of the table.
It seems to be a pretty casual restaurant, which isn't the most common when it comes to French cuisine. It makes sense though, because the food is shit. Everyone else seems to like it enough, but the place sells chicken tenders. What type of French restaurant sells chicken tenders?
He also can't help but feel like he's at the kids table. Luna is currently busy sticking her fingers in his Boeuf Bourguignon, picking at the spaghetti. His question is why, in God's name, is Boeuf Bourguignon served with spaghetti. This place is a disgrace.
The kids last roughly 6 minutes after their food is served, before they're off to go play in the play area at the back of the restaurant. Lily and Pandora follow to keep an eye on them.
Immediately the remaining 4 look at each other.
"What do we think?" Evan barely gets the sentence out before Barty gives his answer.
"SHE'S A GINGER"
"She's nice" Dorcas shrugs "She doesn't seem like a creep, and she clearly likes Dora"
Evan nods along "Yeah, she's polite and respectful and seems genuine."
Eyes fall on Regulus, but as he's about to say what he thinks of Lily, Barty interrupts by repeating his previous statement. "She's. A. GINGER." Barty says it as if it's a sin.
They all seem to silently agree to just ignore Barty.
Regulus has his answer prepared in his head, but the words that follow have nothing to do with Lily. "The food is worse than my mother's piece of shit personality"
Barty is the first to burst out laughing and Dorcas gives him an incredulous look, but she's smiling nonetheless. "But, uh, Lily seems okay?" he adds, but it comes out as a question.
"Of course, of course, the heir of Black, ever so hard to please." Dorcas rolls her eyes, but she's still smiling.
"Are we not going to pay attention to the fact that she's a ginger???" Barty seems desperate. "No Barty, we don't care about her hair color"
Regulus notes the waitress who's been glaring a hole in his skull for the last 5 minutes, presumably about his comment on the food, before walking over and offering them drinks.
Regulus wisely chooses not to get anything else as he assumes they'll spit in his drink. He orders Pandora another virgin sangria, again wondering what type of alleged French restaurant this is. Dorcas orders more of their shitty, cheap white wine and Evan refills his water.
Barty is still rambling about how Lily has red hair and how he thinks she should dye it. He only shuts his mouth when Evan elbows him in the stomach hard enough, that he grunts, when he sees the girls and kids approaching.
Harry is holding Luna's hand, and the latter just seems happy with the contact.
They finish their lunch, and then the fight starts about who is driving with who.
They came in three cars.
Lily and Pandora, with Luna and Harry in Pandora's car, and Regulus, Barty and Evan in Regulus's car. And Dorcas drove herself since she stopped at someone's house before meeting them at the restaurant.
The problem lies there.
Luna is currently throwing the world's biggest tantrum, because she wants to go with Regulus. And Regulus having a soft spot for his little moon, is of course willing to do anything to make her happy.
Pandora doesn't want to give into the tantrum, but everyone in the parking lot is starting to stare.
All hell breaks loose, when Harry, ever the gentleman, supports Luna, and throws himself down to the floor beside her. They're kicking and screaming and crying and not letting their mothers pick them up.
Regulus gives Pandora a look, and she sighs before giving him a defeated nod. Regulus walks over to Luna and crouches down.
"My little moon, would you stand up for me please? You can come with me, but you need to get up." Luna looks at him through her long, tear soaked eyelashes before holding onto his knee and helping herself up.
"Uh, you too please Harry" Regulus adds awkwardly. He finds it kind of sweet how he threw a fit as well, just because his friend was upset, though he'd never admit that out loud.
Harry gets up without any problems, considering he wasn't really upset in the first place.
Luna toddles closer to him, standing between his knees, leaning on his chest. He rubs her back and allows her to wallow a little. She mumbles something but no one can make out what she's saying.
"Try again baby, I can't hear you." Regulus encourages her softly. "Luna want -- with me" Regulus can't hear what exactly who she wants, but he assumes it's Harry. He looks over to Lily who is scolding Harry quietly.
Pandora sees him looking, and nudges Lily gently.
"Uh, Lily, Luna wants Harry to drive with us, is that okay?" he realizes he sounds super awkward.
"We'll transfer the car seats to my car. I had to take the one I had for Luna in my car out, because of those two" Regulus points to Barty and Evan, who then look at each other.
"Yeah, I suppose that's fine, if Pandora trusts your driving enough to let Luna go with you, Haz can go with you guys." Lily shrugs.
Pandora claps her hands before turning to Barty and Evan. "Car seats please boys. Chop chop. I want to play candy land."
Barty is about to whine about it, but Evan elbows him for the second time that evening.
After the car seats are transferred into his car, Regulus checks them over to make sure Barty and Evan don't try to kill the kids by not putting them in properly.
Lily loads Harry in the car, while Pandora does the same with Luna, on the other side. He can't help but take note of Lily's reaction when she sees his car.
She stared at it wide eyed before pretending it was normal. Regulus smirked a little. His car is by far the most expensive in the entire parking lot.
Pandora drives what she calls her mom car, a Ford EcoSport.
Dorcas is driving her dad's double cab, which is a little run down and the paint is chipping, but she seems to love the ugly old thing.
Barty announces he and Evan will drive with Cas and so everyone gets ready to leave.
Regulus gets in the car, before realizing the child lock isn't on.
His friends watch as he gets out of the car and switch both doors child lock on.
He sees a small smile from both Lily and Pandora, before they drive off.
He gets back in the car, locks the doors before getting his phone and playing Lunas favorite song.
American idiot by Greenday
Fuck knows where she got it from, but Regulus suspects it's Barty. She just calls the song "idiot"
He starts driving, and looks at the kids through the mirrors. He comes to see how Harry is getting more comfortable with him. It makes him both uneasy and uncomfortable.
The 3 year old is happily swinging his legs and playing with one of the many toys Luna leaves in his car. He has more toys, blankets and pacifiers in his car, than he cares to admit. He doesn't dare take any of it out.
The drive home consists of a wild mixture of music and a lot of toddler originated conversations.
He pulls into his driveway, parking his car in the garage, next to where Pandora's already parked car is.
Dorcas parks the truck in the drive way behind him.
Regulus gets out of the car and gets harry out first, since his car seat is behind the drivers seat. He picks him out and sets him down, before they both walk over to Luna's side.
Luna on the other hand, does not want to be set down. And when Harry sees his friend being held, he too wants to be picked up. He raises his arms, in the universal toddler sign of 'pick me up bitch'. Regulus being a fucker with apparently no backbone, picks the other toddler up too. He just wants to get inside faster, it's freezing.
He thanks whoever left the door from the garage into the kitchen open, and walks in with a kid in each arm. Luna and Harry are happily talking to each other which is what draws the attention of the moms.
Next thing he knows, there's the click of a camera, and 2 flashes coming his way.
Lily is standing with her phone out, smiling. And Pandora has her camera out, taking multiple pictures.
Regulus scowls at them.
He gives Pandora a 'really?' look, but continues through the kitchen. He again attempts to set them down, but both cling to him like koalas. He's glad he has some upper body strength, otherwise the weight would've started to bother him.
He sits down on the couch, a child now on each leg, their feet dangling between his thighs. Pandora snaps another picture before giggling and walking back to the kitchen.
Soon enough candy land, as per Pandora's request, is open in front of them, since it's also one of the few games the kids can actually understand enough to play.
...
Somewhere around 6, Pandora disappears into the kitchen and comes back holding a bottle of wine and multiple glasses. Dorcas lights up at the sight of the Red Bordeaux and that's when they started drinking.
"YOU CANT CHARGE ME FOR LANDING NEXT TO YOUR PROPERTY BARTY" Evan is screaming at his boyfriend who is making monopoly harder than it should be.
Regulus wants to slap them both and tell them to shut up before the neighbors make a noise complaint. He mentally sighs, it probably wouldn't even help.
"NO, YOU'RE ON MY PROPERTY" Evan is, in fact, not on Barty's property.
"SEE LOOK. LOOK!!" Barty points to the board. "YOU'RE ON THE BORDER. GIVE ME MY GOD DAMN MONEY." Regulus moves Evans piece, the top hat, so that it doesn't touch the line. "Problem solved" he mutters to himself, but Barty, unfortunately, hears.
"NO. NOT PROBLEM SOLVED. PROBLEM STILL VERY MUCH UNSOLVED. EVAN-" he points an accusatory finger at Evan "-IS THE PROBLEM. YOU CAN'T TRY TO GO OVER THE BORDER AND WHEN YOU'RE STOPPED SUDDENLY WANT TO GO BACK?? WHAT ARE YOU? A MEXICAN IMMIGRANT?"
Lily's jaw drops at Barty's words and Pandora shoots them a glare that make them both shut up very fast. She clearly doesn't want them to scare her new girlfriend off already.
Harry stirs where he was sleeping on the couch and everyone goes dead silent, watching to see if he'll fall asleep again. Luck is proven to not be on their side, as Harry lifts his head from the couch rubbing his eyes and frowns at the adults. "Mama?"
Lily gives a sigh, but there's a small smile on her lips. "Right here baby."
Harry seems to barely acknowledge his mothers words before he slides off the couch, head first, over Regulus shoulder, into his lap.
Regulus is sitting crossed legs on the floor, his back against the couch, and the coffee table in front of him.
He awkwardly catches Harry, who slumps against him. Harry sticks his thumb in his mouth, before wiggling a little into Regulus' lap, his head now in Regulus' arm
Lily is looking at him, a hint of surprise on her face, and Pandora is trying not to laugh.
Regulus is shocked. And uncomfortable. And confused. And did he say uncomfortable yet.
He barely knows this kid. Why do kids seem to like him so much? He doesn't like them that much. We'll except for Luna.
"Uh, you," he clears his throat, "you, uh, want this back..?" he offers Lily her own child.
"No no" Dorcas interjects before Lily can reply, shooting Regulus a smirk. She knows he's uncomfortable. She's doing this on purpose. "We don't want to wake him again. Anyway, my turn!"
She rolls the dice and everyone goes back to the game, besides him and Lily. Lily is still looking at him, smiling, but still seemingly shocked.
Regulus gives her what he hopes is a look of reassurance, but he's not so assured himself, so he doesn't know how his face looks at the moment.
"Don't look so horrified, mate." Evan whispers from next to him
"I am horrified" He pauses, "who is this kid?" Evan doesn't reply to his question but does mention how kids are supposedly drawn to him like tiny, lopsided fridge magnets.
Regulus downs his wine. And the next glass that follows.
Barty, at some point, reaches for the wine, and after filling his glass, drips a bit of wine on Harry's forehead. He licks his thumb, wipes it off, and licks the wine from his finger, before anyone notices. He shoots Regulus a grin before focusing back on the game.
The game in question's rules, has far long been forgotten. At this point they're just making shit up as they go along.
The dice rolled somewhere under the couch and now everyone is just moving their pieces as much as a random number suggests.
It's also starting to be a drinking game. Whenever someone lands on someone else's property, you either pay them, or take 2 shots. Why 2? God alone knows.
...
The night is long, and before they know it, Dorcas' phone rings.
She leaves to pick it up, which leads them to see the time. It's 23 minutes past 12 in the morning.
"Shit. Shitshitshitshitshit" Lily cusses under her breath before getting up from the floor. She stumbles slightly. "Shit" she says again, when she realises most of them are at least a little drunk.
Pandora offers for her to sleep over. Offering both her room, and one of the spare rooms, since their house has 5 bedrooms.
Lily takes her up on her offer and decides to stay with her.
Barty and Evan invite themselves to sleep over, and Dorcas agrees to aswell, when offered.
Regulus slowly gets up, the wine and tequila hitting him all at once. His stomach churns but he needs to stay focused since Harry is still in his arms.
He steps over Evan's legs and slowly starts up the stairs. He barely notices Lily following, and while clearly drunk, much drunker than him, keeping a watchful eye. Regulus places Harry next to Luna in her, awfully big, floor bed. He stumbles when getting back up, silently cursing the low bed
Barty and Evan leave to the guest bedroom, stumbling up the stairs, tripping over every second one, while holding onto each other. Barty is giggling quite loudly. They enter the guest bedroom furthest from the kids and shut the door behind them. Regulus can only pray they don't have drunk sex in his guest room. They get loud during drunk sex, Regulus would know. He visibly grimaces and shivers, remembering the few weeks he stayed with them, while his kitchen was being renovated.
Dorcas leaves to the other guest bedroom, much quieter and more graceful than Barty, but she also stumbles a little.
Pandora and Lily have also disappeared into Pandora's room, but the light is still on. But knowing Pandora, he thinks they're asleep.
Regulus walks past the room, listening first, just in case he walks into something he doesn't want to walk into. When no sound comes from the room he knocks, but receives no answer from either Lily or Pandora. He slowly opens the door to see them both passed out, sleeping in the same clothes they were in the day prior. He switches the light off, closes the door and goes downstairs to lock the sliding glass door and put the wine glasses in the sink.
Regulus now finds himself in the middle of the staircase. He's on his way back upstairs, and can't help but wonder.
Why the fuck are there always so many people in his house.