I like you
Marlene's POV
School's finally started and I feel like I'm on a cloud as I'm walking with my girlies to class. I'm so happy we've got DADA together with Ravenclaw, because otherwise I barely see Dorcas.
I've been stuck with something since the beginning of the past year. And during this summer, it's gotten worse.
I think, no, I know I like someone. Like really like someone. And I feel like I can't keep it in anymore, like, if I don't know if the feelings are reciprocal or not I'm going to explode or something. I just need to know. So I can either really act and enjoy or know if I have to get over it.
I am unable to keep my concentration to the lesson. As soon as it is over I find Dorcas. I tell Lily they can go without me, I just have to share some gossip with Dorcas. Which isn't a complete lie. We walk through the hallway as Dorcas talks about some new couple in our year. "Is there a reason for this walk?" she suddenly asks. "What do you mean?" I try, hoping I don't sound suspicious. "Well, it seems like you wanted to talk to me about something." Shit, okay, take it easy, you can do this. "I- I think...", I said looking straight into her eyes, trying to hide a blush. "I think- I just- I really like you." I say not looking at her anymore. I'm about as red as a tomato. "Like, in a more-than-friends way." I add.
Fuck, it's out there. Ther's no turning back now. Why isn't she saying anything?! Maybe I can still say this was all a prank? Shit, I don't know what to do.
"Dorca-" But I get cut off by her tuning in her heels.
It really hurts.
It feels like she's just leaving me, standing here with my feelings still in my hands, waiting for her to take them.
Instead I just see her back as she is walking away without a word.
I want to scream and yell and apologize but I cant. This really fucking hurts.
I guess I have my answer now? I guess I can get over her now?
Sirius' POV
Marlene comes running in the Gryffindor common-room with tears in her eyes. Shit. What happened?. I stop her in her frustration and we go to my dorm. (As I can't get into the girl's one) Fuck I hope she's okay.
We shut the door and she literally can't hold herself up anymore and falls on my bed.
"What happened?" I ain't asking if she's okay, that's a stupid question as you can clearly see that she isn't.
"Erm, remember last year? How I told you I had a crush on someone but wouldn't tell you who it was?"
Yeah, i remember that vaguely "You told him didn't you?" She suddenly stops moving, did I say something wrong? "Yeah, something like that."
That's such a weird answer, I feel like I'm missing something but I can't remember what. Last year she told me it was a Ravenclaw student who needs glasses to read, but that's like all of them. And she wouldn't tell me anything else. Except that they are already really close friends and that she doesn't want that friendship to end.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
"No" she says. That's okay, she can tell me whenever she wants to.
"Do you want to look at Remus' records and put something on?"
"Yeah, sounds good."
So we sit on the floor against Remus' bed listening to David Bowie for like half an hour.
She laid her head on my shoulder at the 3d song and now we're both quietly humming. I hit a really wrong note and we end up laying on the floor laughing at nothing.
"Hey, you'll be okay right?"
"Yeah, I think so. Thanks."
Remus' POV
I am not paying attention to the lesson, like, at all. I pretend to make notes but I'm just drawing in my sketchbook in hopes that no one will notice.
I was just drawing lines you know, no specific idea of what I actually wanted to draw. But after a while you could see a face appear in my drawing.
Shit.
I did not mean to do that.
It's Sirius' face.
Fuck! How did this even happen?!
Not that it's a bad drawing, it is pretty accurate actually. Just the fact that I drew him. Like I knew I liked him, I just never thought it was this bad.
Anyway, no one can ever know about it, no one!!
But it's too late. Lily, who is sitting next to me, already saw it. Fuuuuuck, I'm such a squashed mosquito.
She looks at me like she deserves an explanation. Which is kinda fair, I just don't want to give it to her. Not now at least, as we're sitting in class.
"Later" I whisper to her.
She just smiles at me with great satisfaction.
I'm so busted. Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck. But then again, the damage is already done so thinking about him won't hut right? I just, he always slips in my mind and before I know it he's messed everything up which makes me mess everything up. Does that make any sense? And either way I know he would never want to be with me. I mean look at him, first off, he's like super into Marlene, or so it seems. Point is he is not weird like me. And secondly, I'm me. And he deserves better than such a monster.