Sirius
“Remus? Are you in here?” I tugged my mask off my face. It was late, or early in the morning. Three AM to be exact and I decided everyone needed to get the fuck out. I wanted to see Remus, to fucking understand why the hell he avoided the third day of the ball as well. If he had because of me.
“I’m in here Seren, come in.” He called out from behind the door. I cracked it open and saw him laying on his bed reading a book. His arms were wrapped up, and he looked tired. Once he heard me enter his head shot up and he looked happy, relieved almost.
“You look like shit. I brought you tea, Regulus told me you like tea after having rough nights. Safe to assume, you had one?” I set the tray down next to him on his night stand. He sat up a bit more, closing his book to give me his full attention.
“I did. I heard what happened the second night, and I’m sorry. I really didn’t think you would care if I showed up, and I couldn’t explain why I couldn’t show up at the time. I wanted to be there for you. I promise I’ll do my best to make it up to you.” He quickly started to apologize.
“It’s alright Remus, I had high expectations. Besides, you don’t need to make up anything to me if you don’t honestly and truthfully feel it. I’ll understand. Is it rude to ask why you didn’t show up? Did you not like it?” I took the book and gently returned it to his bookshelf.
“I loved it. It was beautiful, and I would have stayed if I could. I can’t lie about that, I watched as they set up the first day, and it was stunning. You were stunning. I’d give anything to have spent the full event with you.” He let out a heavy breath. “I suppose I prolonged this far enough, no it is not rude to ask.”
“Why didn’t you show up then? If everything in you said to come, is it because of me? You say I’m beautiful and then act as if you can’t be seen around me during our ball. Did I do something, did I come on too strongly?” I kept my back to him, scared to turn and face any truth I was dreading.
“Sirius, I physically could not attend. My illness prevented me from being there. Merlin, I’ve been so scared to tell you about it.” He sounded choked up. I turned and faced him to see he was struggling with his words.
“Remus, I don’t care if you are gay. I don’t know if you have noticed but I am as well. Merlin, all of our friends are some form of gay. Is that what you have been beating yourself up about?” I asked, moving to sit down next to him, taking his hands in mine.
“Sirius, I’m a werewolf. Trust me I know you’re gay, my closet is a glass door and it’s been broken open since I was a little boy. No surprise there. The reason I couldn’t attend our ball, is because the middle night was the full moon.” He explained. Everything suddenly clicked.
“Merlin I’m a fucking idiot!” I screamed, covering my face with my hands. “I knew you were a werewolf, but I genuinely forgot! I forgot when you would transform, and by all means you tried in all your best efforts to have me change the balls alignment to the moon phases. I was so set on the theme I forgot what would happen to you. Oh ma belle lune, I’m sorry I missed that detail.”
“You knew? How long have you known? Another note, you don’t care that I’m a big scary monster?” He asked, his hands peeled away mine as he pulled them into his lap. I laughed, tears brimming at my eyes.
“Since the first night. Easy math concluded that if I was right in twenty-eight days you would be gone. You were and I knew. Teddy and you get very moody around then as well, Teddy I think can tell you’re hurting and it makes him upset. You are cranky because you are in pain. I was raised with dark wizards as parents, we had a lot of werewolves around. The signs are clear as day honestly.” I explained.
“You really don’t care, that, that I’m some monster? I could hurt you, or Teddy, and you really have no fucks given about that nugget of information?” He tilted his head like a confused puppy, I couldn’t help but smile.
“You get moody and bitey one night out of the month. Mon chéri, I can get that way any day of the month. Plus, if I’m being entirely honest and reasonable, biting is not the worst thing you can do to me. You are beautiful, every way you are.” I lifted a hand and cupped his cheek. His eyes, still a strong gold, seemed to get more hopeful.
“I’m a big furry fucking monster Sirius, I’m giving you an out from me if you want it. Because I really like you, and I would like to court you.” He huffed out, he rubbed his cheek into my palm and I couldn’t help but smile. Big, scary, and monster were not words I would ever use to describe the walking embodiment of love.
“Okay first of all, you're a giant puppy at most. I’ve met monsters, and human or wolf they typically act the fucking same. You are not like them, you are just a big old puppy. You love your son, and I’ve seen how overprotective of him you are. Why would that change how I see you? You do realize wolves only get aggressive if their packs are being threatened? Do you feel they are threatened?” I pulled myself into his lap, being mindful he might be injured under his clothes.
“Why does he scratch at me then? Why does he scar me? If I wasn’t a monster?” He wrapped his arms loosely around my waist. I hummed, thinking about what could cause that. I rubbed my thumb up and down his cheek, with a smile he kissed my wrist.
“I think it’s because you either have too much energy, or you hate him. Maybe Moony is angry because you are angry with him? I know from personal experience with werewolves that emotions carry, and the more you hate, or hate him, the more he will fight you for control. It should be an even mix of trust and control.” I moved my other hand up and held his face.
“Do you think, maybe if he met Padfoot he would be nicer? If someone I care about romantically showed up. Will he be nicer to me until I can learn to live with him?” He rested his forehead against mine while I contemplated his proposal. I pulled back briefly once his full statement sank in.
“Romantically? So wait, you actually want me? Like I wasn’t overthinking and you actually were flirting with me?” My smile grew very wide while I basically bounced from excitement.
“Why do you think I was very territorial when you were dancing with other men? Normally the day before the full moon I get, well as James likes to put it, broody. Where I get like ten times more fatherly towards Teddy, and very clingy to people I like.” He laughed. His hands moved to sit on my hips.
“Oh so that’s why you were glued to my side all night. Figured it had to do with you wanting to be romantic with me. I certainly was hoping that was the case.” I faked a pout causing him to laugh a bit harder and give my waist a small squeeze.
“Oh trust me I want to be romantic with you. Like I said earlier, I want to court you. Sirius, I want to have you be mine, to marry you, all that bullshit. I want to give you a title, a name all your own, I want to help you heal and grow. I want to be with you everyday, at every step, good and bad. I want to raise Teddy with you. Truth be told, I don’t think I’ve ever or will ever want these things with anyone else.” He let out in one whole breath.
“Fuck, hold on. I wasn’t exactly prepared for this.” I laughed, pulling my head away from his in order to cover my mouth. This time he faked a pout. “Oh don’t give me that look, I came in here with tea. The intention was to talk and make you feel better, not confess I’ve liked you romantically for ages.”
“Oh so it is mutual, here I was thinking you were just teasing me. Étoile, tu as mon cœur.” He confessed. I stopped laughing, perfect French, he confessed in perfect French.
“Lleuad mae gennych fy nghalon.” I confessed back. Suddenly the hands on my waist were behind my head and pulling me back in, but for a kiss. I let out a shaky laugh before I grabbed his face and met him halfway. All I could think was, damn werewolves are good kissers.