who will love me if I'm not top of my school
He was sitting in the dining hall eating breakfast with the other four slytherins he had come to call friends. Evan to his left, Seveus to his right, next to Evan was Barty and next to Severus was Regulus. Lucius was in the middle, like always, he preferred the middle. It felt safer somehow. It was Saturday. so when they got back to the dorms he and Evan would probably duet. Because they don't have any classes today. The five of them walked to the dungeons and entered the slytherin common room. Regulus played piano, Evan played Violin, Barty played harp and Severus played Flute. He played cello. But next to them his skills seemed average. But he pushed down that thought. “I'm just jealous…” he thought to himself.
Jealousy was something that Lucius experienced often, or maybe it was more envy than Jealousy. Either way it was a common feeling for him. But he can push it down. Like he does everything else.
By the time that Christmas rolled around, Lucius was stressing about everything. Home, school, friends, family. It was winter break. So he was back at the Malfoy manor. His least favorite place in all of the UK. he would rather be in Romania with his aunt and uncle, or maybe with his mother in Russia, or even spending Christmas with the Black family or the Rosier’s. At least they actually care about him. And they don’t get drunk and beat him…
He was sitting in his room, a dark, always cold room that he grew to dread being in. The walls were dark gray with the same black marble floorings that lined the entire manor. A king sized four poster bed frame with a blush black comforter that definitely is not even half as comfortable as it looks. Matching blush pillows. His entire room was mostly black and gray.
His father called his name from the ground floor. He dreaded what that meant. He was slightly shaking and mouth felt dry. He got off his bed and walked down the stairs and to the kitchen where his father was standing leaning over the sink, one hand on the counter next to the sink and the other one clutching a bottle of fire whisky. He could smell his father from the doorway. The fear was bubbling in his stomach, he didn’t want to even know what his father wanted. He feared his father more than anyone. And his brother wasn’t home so he had no one to step in and stop Abraxas from hurting him. “Yes father..?” he asked softly, Abraxas’s head turned to look over his shoulder at Lucius. “Come here, darling..” Abraxas cooed as he set down the bottle and turned his body to face lucius. A shaky breath left his lips as he stepped forward and around the island, stopping just a few feet away from his father. Abraxas smiled, a hand reaching up to cup his left cheek. Lucius slightly flinched back before slightly leaning into his fathers touch, it was rare to have this kind of affection from his father, or really just in genrule. Lucius was just touch starved and so any kind of touch felt like heaven. The hand resting on his face soon left and was replaced with a harsh, sharp slap that sent him stumbling back into the island behind him. A yelp left his lips as he looked up at his father, small tears in his eyes. “What did I do father..?” he asked with a shaky questioning tone. Abraxas shrugged and smiled, his yellowing teeth glimed in the candle lit room. Lucius sucked in a shaky breath. “May I go back to my room then, father..?” he asked, eyes flickering to the floor, “You may.” his father responded, and without even thinking, Lucius stood up straight and quickly walked to his room. When he finally got back to his room, he flopped onto his bed, trying his hardest not to cry.
It never really occurred to Lucius that he could just walk out the front door and not come back for days and his father wouldn't notice. But when he did finally come to this realization he used it to his advantage, he packed a bag and left the house without a word to his father. He really didn’t know what to do or where to go, so he just walked around for a few hours, until he saw, oddly enough. Regulus and his mother, Walburga. He smiled to himself and walked over to Regulus. “Hey Reggie!” he said just loud enough for Regulus to hear. A little starred yelp left his lips as he turned around to look at Lucius, “Oh my lord! You scared the crap out of me, Lucius!” he laughed out, lightly punching him in his shoulder. Walburga turned around to see who Regulus was talking to, seeing the shoulder length, straight white blonde hair, the gray blue eyes, the pale skin and short stature, she smiled. “Lucius! What a pleasure to see you, darling!” she smiled out opening her arms for a hug, Lucius smiled back leaning into the hug, He and Walburga talked for a few minutes before she asked what he was doing out of the house without Abraxas, Lucius smiled out a cheap excuse, Walburga smiled and turned to Regulus, handing him some galleon, telling him to be safe and and invited Lucius to spend christmas with them. Which Lucius happily agreed to. She told him and Regulus to be home at a reasonable time before walking off to join her husband and other son (Sirius) at the wand shop.