Chapter 6
Half a decade later, Regulus was back in the hotel he’d started in. Feeling conflicted about returning to James, not even sure if he’d moved on or if he was even still there. His mind came up with a thousand solutions for every possible question he’d had, he doubted himself but he’d been in Europe for too long and came across too many vampires so he had to go somewhere.
He’d decided to book a flight back home, back to where James was. He was wondering how he was now, if he’d moved on, if he was even still alive. How would he react if he saw Regulus again? He couldn’t help his curiosity and packed his things back up for the flight later on.
Finding himself unable to stop thinking about James, about how he’d left things. Finally realising that it wasn’t the best way to go about things but in the heat of the moment his anger took over, the image of James kissing Lily still made his veins burn in hate.
He’d got all of his belongings packed within the hour, sitting around waiting for the plane got to him. His mind full of thoughts, was he still with Lily? Was he even still there? Had he forgotten about Regulus? His mind was playing cruel tricks on him but part of him felt like he deserved it.
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When the sun was almost about to rise, he’d arrived at his old house. Feeling nostalgic and sick at the same time, flooded with memories of him and James in that house. He pushed past it and headed inside, unlocking the door to set his bags down as he looked around the house. It was the exact same as he’d left it, the wine glasses from James and Lily stay put on the table and the blood mark by the door from the back of James’s head remained.
A wave of guilt rushed over him as he walked up the stairs, clothes still strewn over the floor and it just made him feel worse. The memory of their argument filled his head, the sound of James’s head connecting with the wall sounded in his ears.
He’d switched on the lights as he walked through the house, each memory of each room hitting him like a ton of bricks. He had almost every emotion pulsing through his veins as he cleaned up the mess left from the last time he was there. While cleaning he heard the door open and shut, a familiar feeling hit him as he made his way to the top of the stairs tentatively. Not sure what or who it was, Regulus padded his way down the stairs and felt like his heart had jumped into his throat.
Standing in front of him, looking like a lost puppy was James. Staring at him like a deer in headlights as the both of them seemed to struggle to find anything to say.
“Regulus?”
James sounded small and fragile as he looked up at Regulus who’s just standing there, stupidly staring at James. James also stands there but after a moment he blurts out. "I'm sorry, I didn't know you were back, I'll go. I’m so sorry."
He quickly turns, fumbling with a key ring and removing the key leaving it on the table by the door practically running out. Regulus followed quickly, standing in front of him as he placed his hands in front of James and tried to find the right words to say.
“Wait James wait.” Regulus looked at him, “I'm sorry I didn’t tell you I was back but I swear I haven't been back even an hour, I couldn't stand living alone after you showed me how good it feels to have a companion. I know how I left things and I really am deeply sorry but if you’d like, do you think we could try to be friends again?” He asks, playing with his fingers anxiously.
James stands surprisingly quiet before quickly rushing to agree with what Regulus had said. “I’ll be whatever you want me to be, I’m sorry for what I did, I really am. I don’t know why you’re giving me a second chance.” Regulus notices the tears forming in the corners of James’s eyes and feels his heart beat faster.
“I’m sure you know how hard it is to live on your own, I could manage it for the first year or two but I couldn't manage it any longer than that.” Regulus picked at his nails nervously, not looking James in the eye properly.
James nods, “I get it. It was… it was really hard when you left. I’d been going a bit crazy.” He looks down, his face slightly flushed and Regulus can’t help but smile at that.
“Me too, I went round all around Europe before it finally hit me.” Regulus replies, not taking his eyes off of James now.
“Did you have fun?” James asks, glancing up to him but he wasn’t even sure if he wanted to know.
“Honestly? I did for the first few years but after a while it got lonely, I wasn't really staying anywhere long enough to make friends.”
James nods again, glancing down to his hands before asking softly. “Did you come back for me?” It breaks Regulus’s heart a little and he has to take a breath.
“I did. It felt wrong without you, you showed me how to live properly and living without you felt awful.” Regulus steps forward and reaches a hand to James’s.
James takes it and his shoulders relax a bit, “Yeah? It’s been awful without you too, I just barely got my shit together.” Regulus pulls his hand to wrap his arms around James.
“I missed you so much.” Regulus’s head rests on James’s shoulder as James’s face is buried in his chest.
“I missed you too, I fell apart without you. I kept your stuff… I get it if you want them back.” He feels James's body shaking against his own.
“No you can keep it, I got a lot of new clothes and things while I was travelling.” James nods into him, neither of them releasing their grips on each other.
“There isn’t a moment that went by that I didn't regret what I did to you.” James confesses into his chest as Regulus pushes his face into James’s shoulder.
“I forgive you.” Regulus’s arms tighten around him as James reciprocates and does the same.
“Really?”
“Really.”
“Thank you. You don't know how much that means to me.” James’s voice sounded broken, like he was on the verge of tears as Regulus moved one of his hands to the back of James’s head.
“Do you want to spend the night with me? It’s okay if you don't want to, I understand if you don't.”
“I really want to. Please. I promise I won't do anything you don’t want me to but it would be really nice to spend the night with someone.” James replies, leaning into Regulus’s touch still.
Regulus pulls away, taking his hand as he leads them both back inside and James follows eagerly, never wanting to let go of his grip. Regulus shuts the door behind them and heads upstairs, finding some pyjamas for the both of them.
“Do you want your coffin or the bed? My coffin hasn’t arrived yet.” Regulus asks as he glances at the coffin.
“Umm, the coffin is fine. I haven’t slept in a bed in a while anyways.” James answers as they both change, Regulus moves to turn the lights off and pull the curtains shut tight. Regulus gets in first and it's clear that James is hesitant before he climbs in, being careful not to press against Regulus.
James is pressed uncomfortably against the wall of the coffin but he stays quiet, looking at Regulus who opens his arms and offers James a small smile to pull him in. James stares for a few seconds before moving to cuddle up with him, his hands clinging onto Regulus’s shoulders as his face is buried in his neck.
Regulus wraps his arms around the other man and reaches to pull the lid shut, they both lay together quietly. It should be an uncomfortable silence but they both relish in the familiarity of it all. They stay like that for almost ten minutes before Regulus speaks up.
“Are you okay?” His voice is barely over a whisper as he threads his fingers into James’s hair.
“I don’t want to wake up, if this is a dream I don't want to wake up.” James replies and despite how unnerving his sentence was, his body relaxed into Regulus.
“This isn’t a dream. I can pinch you if you’d like.” Regulus keeps his hand in James’s hair, his comment earning him a laugh from the other man as he tipped his head back to look up at Regulus.
“I don’t think I'd want to know if it was a dream, I missed you so much when you left it’s like you took my heart with you and I couldn’t go on without my heart.” James sounded vulnerable and it made Regulus’s heart hurt again as he turned his head down to meet his eyes.
“I’m sorry I left for this long, it was great travelling again but it always felt like there was an empty part of me.” Regulus replies as he chews his lip feeling a little uncomfortable but he knew they needed to have this conversation.
“I didn’t think you were ever going to come back.” James admits, looking at Regulus as he rests a hand over his ribs.
“I thought about it but I don't think I could've found someone new.” Regulus says, unable to take his eyes off of James.
“You really didn’t move on?” James asks, smiling a little at him.
“I couldn’t, I haven't even had sex in years.” Regulus replies, saying it like it's a casual conversation topic and James’s eyes widen almost comically before he looks a bit guilty.
“I’ve been sort of celibate for almost two years now.” James responds, feeling guilty about it.
“You know I don't care that you’ve slept with other people, we were broken up.” Regulus shrugs slightly and James nods.
“I tried to sleep with people just to feel something but it was never like you, I think I even cried once during sex.” James looks a little ashamed and Regulus can't help the laugh that slips past his lips.
“I just couldn’t find anyone like you, I never stayed in one place long enough to.” Regulus glances away before regaining eye contact as James moves closer, wanting to be as close to Regulus as he could get.
They both close their eyes and end up sleeping together, James utters a ‘sweet dreams’ to Regulus but there was no answer and James smiled to himself. Feeling at home again as he drifts off, his head resting on Regulus’s chest.
The morning after was filled with a familiar domesticity that had James smiling stupidly the full time, they woke together, dressed together and even hunted together. He couldn’t help but feel at peace the entire time he was with Regulus, feeling fully at home now he was back. They moved and talked like no time had passed, a little tension in the air but they were back to normal and it brought James happiness. He couldn’t help the warm feeling in his stomach, loving the way they seemed to be back to normal within a day. He knew this wouldn’t necessarily be the truth but he told himself to enjoy it while it lasted.
THE END