Beyond Fear

The next morning, Luna woke up and found herself spooning with Harry. One of his arms was under her head, and the other rested on her belly. Before she could savor the feeling of being in his arms, she felt something tremble against her stomach. She looked down, as if to confirm, and the tremor came again.

"Harry! Wake up!" Her voice was filled with amazement, surprise, and excitement. He immediately opened his eyes.

"Luna? What is it?" He was startled by her voice and began to move his hand away from her belly, but she held it in place.

"I felt them move!" She was smiling.

"What?" he asked, stunned.

"The babies! I felt them move!" She was excited now. Then she shifted position to face him.

"Really?" He smiled, equally excited.

Luna lifted her pajama shirt, already tight around her belly, and placed his hand on her skin. They both stayed silent, Harry not taking his eyes off her belly, as if afraid he’d miss it if he blinked.

Then it happened—the vibration came again. Both of their eyes widened, and huge smiles spread across their faces.

Before either of them could stop themselves, Harry spoke to her belly. "Hello! This is Daddy. Are you excited today?" The belly trembled again as if responding to his voice.

"And this is Mommy too. We love you so much."

A second later, the belly moved again. The two parents looked at each other, their eyes brimming with tears. It was the most emotional moment of their lives, and the happiest one as well. Harry and Luna felt their hearts might burst. They knew they’d remember this moment forever.

“That was the most amazing thing that has ever happened in my life,” Harry said, his voice unable to hide the emotion.

“My heart feels like it’s going to explode. I love them so much,” Luna concluded, a tear rolling down her cheek.

They stayed there, overwhelmed with emotion—Harry’s hand on her belly and Luna’s hand over his. Harry didn’t want to remove his hand for fear of missing it if it happened again, but unfortunately, they couldn’t spend the entire day there.

"If you feel them again, will you tell me?" he asked hopefully.

"Of course!" She smiled at him.

That morning, Luna didn’t feel like reading about the "TV project." Instead, she sat in her armchair with a sketchpad in hand and paints scattered around her. From his spot on the sofa, a book in hand, Harry kept glancing at her curiously. When she barely stopped to eat lunch and mentioned she’d study for her N.E.W.T.s later, Harry’s curiosity grew. By late afternoon, Luna lifted her face from the sketchpad, her fingers stained with paint.

“Done.”

She handed the pad to Harry, and when he saw what she had done, all the emotions he’d felt that morning returned. His eyes filled with tears, and he felt warmth spread through him.

“Luna, this is perfect,” he said, unable to take his eyes off the drawing.

Luna had captured the exact moment they felt the babies move. The drawing showed Harry and Luna lying in bed, her hand on her belly, both of them smiling broadly with teary eyes. It was so vivid it looked like a photograph. The drawing didn’t move, but above their heads, their words to the babies appeared and disappeared. It was beautiful and moving.

“I want to frame it. I can also make a copy for you if you’d like,” she offered.

“I’d love that!” he said immediately. “You’re an artist, Luna.”

“Thank you.” Her cheeks flushed slightly at the compliment, and Harry found it adorable.

Later, after Harry had helped Luna clean up her painting supplies and they had returned to their studies, Harry decided to say what had been on his mind all day.

“Luna…”

“Yes?” She looked up from her book.

“Thank you for coming to me.” He didn’t need to explain much more. “I’ve been having nightmares pretty often, and it’s exhausting, but every time you’re there, I manage to sleep well.” He didn’t understand why but couldn’t deny it. He wasn’t sure if it was simply having someone near or if it was Luna, but something told him it was the latter.

“You’ve done the same for me a few times, actually,” she replied with her signature smile, warming Harry’s heart.

Then, because she was Luna—completely unpredictable—she said, “I think we should sleep together then.”

Harry dropped his book and nearly choked on air. He looked at her to confirm she was joking, but all he saw was her serene gaze watching him.

“S-Sleep together?” he stammered.

“Yes. We both have nightmares, but when we sleep together, they go away. The logical thing to do is to sleep together.” Harry was astounded by how she suggested something so embarrassing as if talking about the weather. Luna Lovegood never failed to surprise him.

The most awkward part was that he thought she was right. But it felt entirely inappropriate to accept her suggestion. Even though his best nights of sleep in years had been with her there.

He kept staring at her, probably looking like a fish with his mouth open.

“Luna, I think that would be inappropriate, and Ginny probably wouldn’t like it.” He spoke without thinking. It was the thought swirling in his mind.

Luna’s expression changed instantly. Her cheeks turned bright red.

“I’m sorry, Harry! You’re right. That suggestion was entirely inappropriate, even though it was made in friendship.” Her voice was filled with complete embarrassment, and Harry had never seen her so mortified.

He felt awful for making her feel that way. “You don’t need to apologize, Luna. I know it was a friendly suggestion,” he tried to reassure her, but she remained embarrassed.

“No, Harry. You have a girlfriend, and this situation is already complicated enough as it is. Please forgive me if I crossed a line. It won’t happen again.” She ended the conversation by returning to her book.

Harry sat there, staring at her, thinking that he’d actually like to, but lacked the courage to agree. It felt like too much intimacy to sleep with someone every night, even though he was sure her invitation was purely platonic. Ginny would be hurt, and that was the last thing he wanted.

Still, he felt terrible for making Luna feel ashamed. He could see her shoulders were tense, even as she focused on her book.

After dinner, Luna made a copy of the drawing and framed both. One she asked Harry to place above the living room fireplace, and the other she gave to Harry, who put it on his bedside table.

That night, she immediately asked him to take her to her room, different from their usual evenings of stargazing or chatting.

In the middle of the night, Harry woke up drenched in sweat, his heart racing. He’d had a nightmare in which Voldemort was with Luna and the babies. By the time Harry arrived to save them, they were already gone.

He reached for a glass of water on his bedside table, his hand trembling. Despite telling himself it was just a dream, the fear lingered. He lay staring at the ceiling for a while, but his heart wouldn’t calm.

On impulse, he got up and walked to Luna’s room. She had a small light on in the corner, as she couldn’t sleep in complete darkness. The light reflected off her hair, making it shine. Before he could change his mind, he approached the bed and slowly, so as not to wake her, lay down.

Even so, Luna stirred and opened her eyes.

“Harry?” Her voice was sleepy.

Before he could respond, she moved closer, draped an arm over his waist, and fell back asleep. His heartbeat slowed, and the fear melted away. He wrapped an arm around her waist, and before he realized it, he was asleep too.

The next morning, when Luna woke up, Harry was already gone, and she was alone in the bed.

As the day unfolded, neither of them mentioned Harry going to Luna’s bed. She knew Harry well enough to understand there was no point in trying to force him to talk about something he didn’t want to, and honestly, she didn’t mind him coming, even though she felt embarrassed about her earlier offer.

Luna spent the night reflecting on how inappropriate it had been to invite him to sleep with her, even though it was friendly and helped keep the nighttime demons at bay. She was so tired of being afraid. Was it so wrong to want to sleep peacefully?

“Harry!” Luna called as Harry was finishing lunch in the kitchen.

“Yes?” he replied from the kitchen.

“I think I’ve figured out how to make the television work. If you buy one, we can test it,” she said thoughtfully.

Harry stepped out of the kitchen. “Really?” His smile was huge.

“I think so.” She returned the smile.

“Well, I’ll need to go to Muggle London to buy one,” he noted, frowning as he realized he’d have to leave Luna alone.

“How long do you think it’ll take?” she asked.

“Maybe two hours,” he pondered.

“I can stay alone,” she observed.

Harry stayed silent for a moment. “We could call Neville,” he offered.

“I’ll send him an owl. When are you going?” She was already summoning parchment and a quill.

“I can go tomorrow. I need to stop by Gringotts to exchange the money.”

“All right, I’ll ask if he can come.”

Luna wrote a letter inviting Neville to spend the morning with her. An hour after sending it, Neville replied, saying he’d be happy to come.

Once again, during the night, after another nightmare, Harry went to Luna’s bed. This time, when Luna woke up, Harry was still there, sleeping. She observed the details of his face, and the more she looked, the more she found him beautiful. He seemed so peaceful lying there, his hand on her belly and his face buried in the pillow. Luna’s heart raced when he opened his eyes, and the first thing he did was smile. It was a shy smile. They stayed silent for a while.

“Is it so wrong to just want one night of sleep? To sleep without nightmares?” he said quietly.

“I don’t think it is,” Luna replied.

“I’m so tired of fighting what I want just to do what I should.” He closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

“You’ve been doing that your whole life. It must be exhausting.”

“It is. I’ve had nightmares for years, never sleeping properly, but here I can.” He didn’t need to say “with you.”

“I’d like to help you with that, but I can’t. Only you can decide,” she said.

He stayed silent. But Luna thought he looked like a lost child, so she decided to change the subject.

“I was thinking, we should come up with names for the boys.”

Harry looked surprised. “I hadn’t thought about it, but you’re right.” He rubbed his hand on her belly, and they both felt the tremor in response. The tremor happened a few times a day, but neither of them ever tired of it.

“I thought one of them could be named after your father,” she said softly.

Harry’s eyes filled with tears. “I’d love that, Luna.” He lifted his head and kissed her cheek.

“We can think of a name for the other one and decide if we want them to have more than one name.” She ran her hand through Harry’s hair, moving it away from his face, and he nodded in agreement.

“Let’s get ready before Neville arrives. I don’t want to waste time and take too long to come back,” Harry said a while later.

He quickly got up and went to shower. When he was done, he returned to Luna’s room to help her as he did every morning.

When Harry was once again kneeling in front of Luna, ready to help her pull on her underwear, they heard a knock at the door.

“Come in, Neville! We’ll be down in a minute,” Harry shouted, and they heard the door open.

Harry pulled up her underwear, still making a great effort to control his body in the southern hemisphere, and then helped her put on the pants she’d wear today. These were sweatpants with an elastic waistband because no other pants fit Luna anymore. She really needed new clothes.

When they went downstairs, Neville was standing in front of the fireplace, looking at Luna’s drawing.

“Good morning, Nev,” Luna greeted cheerfully as she sat on the sofa.

“How are you?” Harry asked.

“Good morning! A little anxious. It’s less than a week until Hogwarts.”

“I understand your anxiety; I’d feel the same,” Harry concluded.

“But you’ll see that the things that make us uneasy can also surprise us positively,” Luna said, using her famous dreamy tone.

“I hope you’re right,” Neville gave a small smile.

“Well, I’ll head out now to not waste time.” And with a move Harry hadn’t predicted, he bent down and kissed Luna on the head before leaving. He spent the rest of the day wondering why he’d done that.

When Harry left, Neville prepared tea and toast for both of them, then sat in the armchair across from Luna.

“How are you?” he asked gently.

“I’m fine. Just tired of always lying down or sitting,” Luna grumbled a bit.

“I imagine it’s awful. How has it been with Harry?” He looked at her with a knowing expression.

“He’s been great; he’s done everything to take care of us,” she said, placing a hand on her belly.

“I imagine he must be a bit tired; every day, he has to help me bathe, dress, cook, and still study for the N.E.W.T.s,” she said with some concern.

Neville, on the other hand, raised an eyebrow and smiled mischievously. “Helps you bathe?”

“Yes, I can’t risk slipping in the shower, and I can’t bend down to put on my underwear either,” Luna said all this innocently, barely noticing Neville’s smile.

“So let me get this straight. Harry needs to help you while you’re undressed, and you also sleep together sometimes.”

“We don’t sleep together; it’s only happened a few times. But how do you know?” Luna seemed curious.

“I saw that beautiful drawing on the fireplace; obviously, you were in bed together.”

“Ah… That was the first time we felt the babies move,” she smiled. “They’re moving now, too. Do you want to feel?”

Neville looked at her belly as if expecting to see something, then got up and held out his hand. Luna took it and placed it on her stomach.

When the tremor stopped, Neville looked astonished. “WOW… That’s amazing!” he said, smiling.

“I know,” Luna said with a smile as she caressed her belly.

“But back to the topic,” he raised his eyebrow again, “You and Harry…”

“Just friends,” Luna said, trying to remind herself.

“But you’d like it to be more,” he suggested.

“He has a girlfriend,” she avoided wincing at the thought. She and Harry spent so much time together, just the two of them, that she often forgot about Ginny.

“He gets jealous of you, is always looking at you, and is extremely protective.”

“That’s for the babies. Everything he does is for the babies,” she tried not to sound sad but failed.

“You know, when you were at St. Mungo’s, and we had no information, he cried in Hermione’s arms, and the first thing he said was: ‘I can’t lose her.’”

Luna’s heart skipped a beat, but she immediately composed herself. It would hurt more if she raised her hopes. “That doesn’t mean anything, Nev. At the end of the day, it’s Ginny he’s with.”

“If you say so…”

After that, they talked about Hannah, Hogwarts, and Neville helped her practice the spell to make the television work, even though he didn’t know what a television was.