Prank Plotting
September 16th, 1971
The common room was quiet, save for the crackling fire and the whispered voices of four boys huddled around a spread of parchment on the coffee table.
“So,” Sirius began, tapping the table with a quill. “We need something that’s clever, annoying, and—most importantly—hilarious. Nothing cruel or harmful, of course.”
“Of course,” James said with a smirk. “But it’s got to be big enough to send a message. Something he won’t forget.”
“Something we won’t forget,” Sirius added.
Peter frowned, tapping his chin. “But how do we even get to him? He’s always sneaking around, and he knows when we’re up to something. It’s like he’s got a sixth sense.”
They all fell silent, deep in thought. Remus leaned back in his chair, the gears in his mind turning. He didn’t want to admit it, but he was enjoying this. The thrill of outwitting someone like Snape, the camaraderie of working together—it was intoxicating.
“I’ve got it,” Remus said suddenly, sitting up straight.
The other three turned to him expectantly.
“What if we charm his robes?” Remus began, his eyes gleaming with excitement. “We enchant them to change color every few minutes—something bright, flashy, and embarrassing. And not just the robes he’s wearing now—we charm all of them. Every robe he owns.”
James let out a low whistle. “Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.”
Sirius grinned. “You’re a genius, Lupin.”
Peter still looked skeptical. “How do we get to his robes? They’re in the Slytherin dormitory, and we’d never make it past their common room.”
Remus nodded. “I thought of that. We don’t need to get into the dormitory. We just need to get to the laundry.”
Sirius’s grin widened. “The house-elves!”
“Exactly,” Remus said. “All the laundry goes through the kitchens before it’s cleaned. If we can sneak in and cast the enchantment there, it’ll affect everything at once.”
“That’s brilliant,” James said, clapping Remus on the back. “How do you know so much about the castle already?”
“I’ve been mapping it out, remember?” Remus replied with a small smile.
Peter still looked nervous. “But… won’t someone notice us sneaking into the kitchens?”
“That’s where you come in, Peter,” Sirius said, giving him a reassuring pat on the shoulder. “We’ll need a lookout.”
The boys spent the next hour refining the plan. Sirius and James would handle casting the enchantment, as they were the most confident with their wands. Remus would lead them to the kitchens using his growing knowledge of the castle’s secret passages, and Peter would keep watch outside to make sure no one interrupted them.
“What colors should we use?” James asked, scribbling notes on the parchment.
“Pink,” Sirius said immediately. “And bright orange.”
“Throw in some polka dots,” Peter suggested, surprising everyone.
Remus chuckled. “Let’s make it random—every robe will change to a different color or pattern every time he puts it on.”
“And it should sparkle,” James added. “Like it’s been dipped in glitter.”
By the time they finished, they were all grinning from ear to ear. The plan was clever, harmless, and guaranteed to irritate Snape to no end.
“Tomorrow night, then?” Sirius asked, folding the map and tucking it into his pocket.
“Tomorrow night,” Remus agreed.
As the boys climbed into bed that night, Remus couldn’t help but feel a surge of pride. The plan was foolproof—or as close to foolproof as any prank could be.
For the first time, he felt like he was truly a part of something. The Marauders, as they’d begun to call themselves, were more than just friends. They were a team, a family.
And as Remus drifted off to sleep, he couldn’t help but smile at the thought of Snape strutting through the corridors in a sparkling pink robe covered in polka dots.