Get Back
The train to Hogwarts: 1976, Fifth Year:
“Just, please pay attention to him,” Peter said to his mother as she passed him the rest of his stuff.
“Yes, Peter I will,” she replied, slightly annoyed at the comment.
Platform 9¾ was noticeably less packed than it had been the year before and even less so than the year before that. Hogwarts attendance rates had been dropping since the start of the war and had gotten much worse in the past two but an attack so close to the school had pushed it over the edge it seemed.
“Don't talk to your mother like that Peter, that's disrespectful,” Peter’s father spoke up. He had been home in time to accompany Peter along with his mother and brother to King’s Cross to catch the Hogwarts Express. He really had been gone so frequently that he had no idea how Peter and his mother talked. It was like having an auror you had never met eat dinner with you and tell you to mind your manners.
“Okay sorry. Sorry, dad.” Peter took his toad from his brother and put her on his shoulder. “Can you tell Ads thanks for the radio? Next time you’re in America?” Peter’s dad nodded.
“I got you something too,” he replied shortly.
“Yes. I know, dad. And it's great. I wore it on my birthday, you can ask Adwen.” He grabbed the rest of his stuff and headed toward the train, giving his brother a side hug on the way off. “Bye, mate.”
Arthur-Eamon let himself be hugged. He was at that age where he wouldn’t hug back but he liked Peter alright so he wouldn’t fight it. Peter nuzzled Arthur-Eamon’s hair and he pushed Peter away in response.
The rest of the summer had passed in a blur of slow, quiet mornings with the occasional owl from Remus, and Marlene would visit sometimes. Peter and Athur-Eamon took turns choosing music to play in their room. Peter had started to hate daytime television. Munster had taken to bumping her nose against the screen to feel the static. Peter tried to stop her but she was stubborn.
Peter’s mum had sobered up a bit too since the attack on Hogsmeade. She seemed sober enough this morning. She always did tend to shape up a bit when her Peter’s dad came home. And by September, the Daily Prophet had finally almost moved on from nearly exclusive coverage about the attack. Peter had started to read the news out of a desperate ploy to fight boredom but it always seemed to be so depressing.
Once he was on the train, Peter passed empty carriage after empty carriage, looking for any of his friends. Finally, he found the carriage where Remus and Lily were waiting sat down inside. They were leaned in toward each other, faces close. There was an almost goofy smile on both their faces. When Peter opened the carriage door, the two stopped talking quickly and leaned back in their seats.
“Hey Peter!” Lily beamed at him. Peter nodded his head up in response. He sat down on the other side of the carriage from the two.
“How was the rest of your summer, Pete?” Remus asked.
“Where are James and Sirius?”
“I dunno. Think I saw them on the platform.”
Remus looked out the window. Lily tried to look over his shoulder but he was getting so tall now that she had to fully stand to do it.
“Oh,” he said, then sat back giggling mildly.
“What?” Peter asked.
“They're talking to your mum.”
Peter looked out and saw the two families talking. James, Sirius, and Euphemia were talking to his mum and his dad was talking with Fleamont. No one was talking with Arthur-Eamon. They all looked so posh from this far off, even his own family. They held themselves with a particularly pureblood upishiness. Godrick, Peter thought, what were they saying? What awful half-truth was his dad telling James’ dad that would eventually get to James and Sirius and then eventually to Gryffindor tower?
Then, Peter’s eyes looked past the group. And there he was, hip popped with one eyebrow up, Gilderoy Lockhart and his stupid lopsided grin that made Peter’s knees wobble every time he saw it. He looked older this year, and he had a new haircut. It was shorter than Peter’s own. Peter studied Gilderoy’s jaw, trying to figure out if it had squared over the summer or if it was just the haircut. His cheeks were sunkissed and he was wearing glasses. He was the tallest of his family: towering over both his parents and two girls with him that must have been relations of some kind, all of them the same shade of golden blonde. Peter tried not to look too long, at the risk of Remus and Lily noticing his eyes straying away from his family.
“So you’ve forgiven Sirius then?” Peter asked Remus, as they both sat back down in their seats.
“What?” Remus seemed somewhat taken back, like he had forgotten the events of last term.
“You seemed like you were on good terms on my birthday.”
The mention of the day made Remus squirm.
“Yeah.” he nodded. “We’re alright.” Peter hummed. He hoped his disapproval was obvious.
“Wait,” Lily interjected. “Forgiven him for what? What did he do?”
“Oh nothing important. Some fight we had last term.” Remus waved his hand in the air to dismiss the question.
Peter was surprised that Lily hadn’t known. Lily knew about Remus’ condition. They were nearly as good of friends as Remus was with any of the Marauders. They always seemed like they told each other everything. Albeit, she didn’t know about the animagus thing or the map but those were group Marauders things. This was Remus’ business, which Lily usually knew even before Peter did.
“I’ll hex him if he hurts you,” she folded her arms and looked Remus in the eye. Remus chuckled quietly.
“I know Lily.” And they did know. Lily Evans was a kind witch by every definition of the word but she was not by any means weak willed. And she would hex anyone who hurt Remus, no matter who they were, including and maybe especially James and Sirius.
“I’ll hex him just cause I feel like it,” Peter said, trying to change the subject on Remus’ behalf.
“Peter,” Lily sighed, emphasizing both syllables of his name.
“For the crime of not having a haircut for what? 3 years?” This made Lily laugh, which made Peter smile.
“Play nice, Pete,” Remus said.
“I mean I’m just saying.” He looked at Remus, ready to make it worse. “He’s in that little dueling club and does the competitions and has been blocking spells from every Slytherin in the school since first year and I can barely hold a wand.” Lily kept laughing. It was the best feeling to make one of the girls laugh. Remus was shaking his head and rolling his eyes. “Let’s be honest here, if I can get one over on him, he probably deserves it.”
Peter would have kept going but the other two Marauders opened the cabin doors and stepped in just then. In fact, Peter had opened his mouth to say something else but shut it as soon as he saw Sirius. Lily laughed with her whole body and fell to her side on the seat.
“Merlin’s beard! What have you two done to her?” James cried in fake concern. Sirius scanned the carriage with his eyes. Lily laughed again when she saw him and Peter laughed with her.
Everyone went over their time tables on the train ride together. Most people’s schedules had cleared up a bit except Remus and Lily who had gotten nearly perfect marks on all their O.W.Ls and were continuing every subject in their NEWTs. Peter’s lectures had shrunk sizably.
All the 6th year Gryffindors stayed entirely together, occasionally branching off for side conversations, all through the train ride and on the carriages and in the great hall, excepting a prefect’s meeting that Lily and James had to attend. Peter had missed people so dearly over the break that the constant talking became a comfort. He brought out Munster and put her little tie on which she tried to eat. Marlene told him about Gavin’s fiance who apparently had made a snide comment about Marlene’s hair over holiday. Mary and Marlene talked about a movie they had seen over break and Mary looked remarkably grown this term. She had been an early bloomer from the beginning but she looked nearly fully adult now. Maybe, Peter thought, it was how she had done her makeup.
This was the paradise that Peter had come to expect in his first 4 years of Hogwarts. Last term and the summer had made him think there was a world where all that had ended, but Sirius and Remus were talking and laughing, Remus with his hands in his pockets trying to pretend he wasn’t gleeful and Sirius skipping along and shoving Remus’ shoulder when he said something witty. And James and Lily were walking beside each other again too, Lily was rolling her eyes at something James had said and James was shrugging with a wicked grin on his face. The seven of them were paired off and Peter walked in the back of the group, kicking the stones at his feet as they walked up toward the castle, listening to bits of every conversation and chuckling to himself. Everything was back to being exactly how it was meant to be.
It was their sixth year at Hogwarts so they were almost to the back of the great hall during sorting, so far from back that Peter could barely see. James had turned toward Peter and commented that he actually couldn’t see that far at all, even with his glasses on. It was a reminder that Peter tried to ignore that they were all getting older.
Once everyone was sorted, which didn’t take long as there were only 10 new students this term, Dumbledore gave a speech. He announced that there would be no trips to Hogsmeade this term. The room began to erupt in whispers and shouts of dismay, especially from the new 3rd years. Sirius booed. Peter was relieved if he was being honest. He didn’t really want to get that close to what he now classified in his mind as a warzone.
Dumbleore hushed the room and continued, introducing a new professor to replace their old charms professor. Peter didn’t pay much attention. He wouldn’t be taking charms this term. His attention drifted elsewhere as he glanced at the Ravenclaw table and there was Gilderoy with the 5th years, glassesless and chatting with Barty and Pandora about whatever they talked about, his hair tossing across his forehead. He looked good. He looked better. He had grown up over the summer and carried himself with a different hue of confidence now. There was less a whimsy about the way he walked and the way he leaned his elbow onto the table. Peter scanned Gilderoy for a few more moments, familiarizing himself with Gilderoy's new handsomeness. Gilderoy flicked his eyes over in Peter's direction. Peter looked down at his lap quickly. When he looked back up to check that Gilderoy had not caught him in the act of indulging his eyes, Gilderoy met his gaze with a warm smile. Peter gave a small smile back.
When Dumbeldore had finished speaking, Peter found the only reason he had realized it was over was because Remus was already half a plate of dinner in. For a skinny bloke, he sure could eat. Peter hadn't paid much attention at all in the end to the speech Dumbledore had given. He’d heard him mention the war and the ‘united effort for good’ and ‘importance of friendship in these times’, but Peter didn’t really care to hear about any of that. The Marauders were back and he wouldn’t need to watch any more daytime television to satiate his boredom. And despite the summer’s horror, the war had not breached the walls of the castle. Peter didn’t mind no longer going to Hogsmeade so long as Gryffindor tower was still safe.
The table chatted beside Peter about this thing or the other. Remus ate silently. Mary and Marlene went on and on about some book some bloke had released over summer holiday and had done signings for in Diagon Alley last week. Marlene was remarking about his Quidditch accreditation and Mary was talking about his potion making skills and ‘personability’ and his jawline. James and Sirius were talking quidditch. Their first game of the season would be against Ravenclaw, who were really the only other team who stood a chance against Gryfindor. The Hufflepuffs weren’t very competitive and the Slytherin students were too busy with dueling club and becoming Deatheaters to worry about sport.
“No. I think they’ve got a better chance than Slytherin though,” Sirius said, shoving a piece of potato in his mouth.
“Well, I think the Slytherin team is gonna be the same lineup as last year. Ravenclaw needs a new Keeper and we need a new Seeker. They do have that advantage, mate,” James said.
Peter ate and listened and watched the room. There were students missing this year and the first and second year end of the table was thin. Gilderoy was laughing. Pandora laughed so hard at one point she fell over backward and landed on the tile floor. Remus bit a large messy bite of everything from his plate and half off it fell straight back down and splattered on his tie; Mary helped him wipe it off. Peter cut off a little piece of tomato and fed it to Munster in his pocket.
*
After dinner, Peter went to Professor Plunkett, who was in charge of chess tournaments and events, to ask if they had a schedule yet.
Chess wasn't a very popular extracurricular so the students knew by now that sometime during the first week, they needed to drop in. Professor Jack Plunkett was not a very ‘on top of it’ wizard. He taught arithmancy and was a genius in every sense— even in the muggle forms of education— but he was unbelievably disorganized. His desk was covered in parchment and old cups of tea and coffee and he had a tendency to forget his robe or his coat and would teach class in a white button up with his tie undone and his cuffs unbuttoned. A number of times Peter had witnessed him enter his office 3 minutes into a class he was meant to be teaching. He was good at his job but you really had to ask him a few times to get him to make a schedule.
When Peter was almost to the door to Professor Plunkett’s office, Kit Eldredge, a Hufflepuff in his year, was just coming out.
“Just asked. He said he'll do it this week and tell us next week but you might need to remind him,” Kit said as he passed Peter.
“Mm. Well I’ve got to ask him about arithmancy anyway.”
“Alrighty. See you in a tourney, Peter. Look forward to losing to you again this year.” Peter hummed and nodded.
He knocked on the door. It would be a waste to have come so far to see his professor just to walk back to Gryffindor tower.
“Come in!” he heard Plunkett call.
Peter stepped inside and Professor Plunkett was in his socks, nursing a cup of tea with a Beatles record on and a book on ‘Quantum Mechanics’ in his hands.
“Well look at you all grown up!” he said, setting his tea down and grabbing a loose piece of parchment next to him to use as a bookmark.
“Hello, sir.” Peter said.
“What can I do you for, Peter?”
“Just checking on chess,” Peter shrugged. Plunkett nodded affirmatively.
“Yes, Mr. Eldredge was as well. I’ll post the schedule for tournaments soon, probably some time this week. I’d like to try to have two this term. How’s that sound?” Peter nodded. It was always awkward to find yourself in a Professor’s office for any reason. Peter was starting to regret his decision to enter.
“So, you're returning to my class this term, Peter?” Professor Plunkett leaned back in his chair and asked.
“Yeah. Got my O.W.L. Don’t really know how.” Plunkett folded his hands on his desk, atop a pile of things, and leaned toward Peter, tilting his head.
“I figured you would. You’ve got a good analytical mind. You should really read some muggle physics books. You’d be good at it.” He’d suggested it before but Peter was hesitant to believe he could understand any of it. Plunkett had tried explaining some of it to his Arithmancy course in 4th year when a question from Emmeline Vance had gotten him off topic. The whole thing had gone completely over Peter’s head.
“Well, see you in class, Professor,” Peter said, walking toward the door.
“Goodnight, Peter,” Professor Plunkett called as Peter was starting down the corridor.
*
On his way back to Gryffindor tower, Peter passed Lockhart in the corridor. This was how Gilderoy was, Peter had realized, always there when he wanted to be. Peter had expected him to start a conversation because— well— he was Gilderoy and Gilderoy loved nothing more than the sound of his own voice but he just kept walking like he had somewhere to be. Peter smiled shyly and Gilderoy smirked and winked.
Peter turned his head over his shoulder and watched Gilderoy walk, with his new confident walk, down the corridor. Gilderoy started whistling a tune and Peter stopped to listen. When he was about to turn the corner, Gilderoy looked back and raised his eyebrows twice at Peter. What a mystery he was, Peter thought, both confused and enchanted by the encounter.
When Peter finally made it back into the Gryffindor dormitories, he entered into his dorm while his dormmates were mid conversation. He stopped on the way up the staircase to listen for a moment.
“It was a publicity stunt,” Sirius whinged.
“It was terrorism,” James replied.
“Right but I mean it was a statement. It was performative.”
“Someone died, Sirius.”
“I just mean,” Sirius let out a loud sigh. “Well known public place, squib business. Clearly, it was a scare tactic. A violent scare tactic but still. Keeping us here instead of getting Hogsmeade trips is just playing right into their hands.” Peter pushed on the door and started stepping inside.
“Happiness,” Sirius continued, unpacking a record and placing it with the rest of his collection. “Happiness is the only proper rebellion we can make against this.”
“Yeah, yeah,” James conceded. “I like the sound of that, Padfoot.”
“What, is there a prank brewing in the Marauders’ dormitory already?” Peter said as he walked toward his bed, trying to turn this in a good direction.
“Oh whatta ya say, Moony?” Sirius said, laying on his stomach across his mattress toward Remus. “Want to think us up a good prank?” Remus looked up from his book.
“Mm maybe. Let me mull it over,” he said. That was always Remus’ response. Peter knew by now that it meant yes. Sirius smiled wider than his face. Yep, everything was back to absolute normal.
Peter pulled back the curtain to his bed and found a novel sitting on his mattress. There was a note taped to the front of it. Peter broke the seal and unfolded it, sat down on his bed and read.
Missed you, Pettigrew. Read this. Ravenclaw common room, next week Friday 7pm. (Bring Munster for Pandora’s sake cause she won’t shut up about her.) X - your favorite blonde (new haircut. Can feel the breeze on my neck finally! June was dreadful.)
P.S. It’s Gilderoy