10. Just Like Old Times
||Edward's P.O.V.||
Seven days.
One hundred and sixty-eight hours.
Ten thousand and eight minutes.
Six hundred four thousand and eight hundred seconds.
That's how much time has passed since I last held my darling Elliana. My little witch. I held her handwritten letter to my chest, savoring the faint scent left behind on the pages.
The enchanted stone she had given me never left my hand. I constantly clutched at the stone, counting down the seconds until it heated up every day. Every night, it warmed in my palm when she was tucked away in bed, preparing to go sleep, and every morning when she woke up. I would also feel it warm intermittently throughout the day, letting me know that she was missing me.
That small piece of enchanted earth was the only thing holding me together.
A constant ache plagued me where my heart should be. I felt hollow. Empty. Every once in a while, a piercing pain would rip through my chest, and it was enough to take my breath away. I wasn't sure how much longer I could cope with this, knowing my mate was an ocean away.
All I did was stare out the window and reminiscence, constantly reliving memories. I could still feel her warmth against me. I could still taste the sweetness of her kiss. She haunted my every waking thought, and I relished it. So, I allowed my Elliana to consume me, thinking of her as I counted blades of grass.
I hadn't fed since she left, nor did I have any desire to. Eventually, I knew I would have to hunt in order to keep the promise I made to her— To take care of myself. But for now, I will wait. And count. And count. And count.
And wait to be united with her again.
My family continued to safeguard Stitchers Bend and Kingsport, but they didn't expect me to participate just yet. They understood my fragile state, so they were picking up the slack without saying a word, for which I was grateful. Carlisle had been keeping up with Dusty, who knew someone that worked for the Ministry in Scotland. The elderly wizard had promised to put a good word in for us in the hopes of getting approval for my siblings and I to 'safeguard' Hogwarts.
It was hard telling how long that would take though. I was well aware how prejudice the wizarding community was towards my kind.
I was pulled from my sulking when Alice burst through the door, her eyes wide and frantic. My entire body stiffened, going into statue-mode as she replayed a vision via her thoughts.
Nearly crushing the stone in my hand, I growled through gritted teeth, "..Victoria."
***
||Elliana's P.O.V.||
The past week has been... difficult for me, to say the least. While I was grateful to be reunited with my friends, there was an ache in my chest that wouldn't cease, and the only person that could ease it was an ocean away in the States.
On top of missing Edward desperately, I was under constant stress trying to stay afloat in my classes. I met up with Professor Snape frequently, and he was proving to be a big help, but I was still struggling. I had my head in a textbook 24/7 as of late, trying to catch up while also keeping my mind occupied.
But no matter what I did, Edward's face would drift through my mind, and I'd be gripped with a stabbing pain in my chest that nearly sent me to my knees. I missed him more with every passing minute.
I allowed myself to think about him for a moment. What was he doing right now? Hopefully, he was hanging out with his siblings. Emmett. Alice, perhaps. Maybe Jasper. I hoped Jasper was using his empath abilities to ease his pain. With any luck, the pain he was experiencing due to our separation wasn't as severe as mine, but deep down, I knew that wasn't true... And I hated it. I wondered if he thought about me as much as I thought about him. Was he taking care of himself? Was he—
"Hellooo.. Earth to Elle." Natalie's voice pulled me from my thoughts as she waved a hand in front of my face.
I blinked rapidly, coming back down to earth. "What?"
Fred and George exchanged a curious look.
Cedric's brows were furrowed as he studied my face with a frown.
Natalie shook her head and sighed.
"Were you even listening?" She asked, pursing her lips in annoyance.
I fidgeted with my pen nervously, releasing a sigh. "..Um, no," I admitted. "I'm sorry, Nat. What were we talking about?"
As I spoke, I fought back a grimace when I felt a tugging sensation in my chest. It was as though I was being pulled in Edward's direction, and I was fighting every instinct not to catch the first flight back to Minnesota. I was surprised by how intense the feeling was.
Up until now, I had been blinded by the all-encompassing pain that I hadn't noticed the pulling in my heart. I feared what he was going through back home, knowing that the feelings associated with the fate bond was even stronger for him due to being a vampire. Bile rose in my throat as I imagined the amount of suffering he was going through with our separation.
Natalie opened her mouth to speak. Judging by the look on her face, she was going to scold me. But instead of being reprimanded, she offered me a forlorn smile.
"..Are you okay, Elle? Like, really?" Her question surprised me.
I made brief eye contact with each of them, ending with Cedric's stormy gaze. His eyes portrayed a battle that was raging within him. There was a heaviness, a sorrow, buried in the depths of his pupils that made my heart clench.
"I'm fine," I breathed out. "I was just.. distracted. I'm listening now."
"Distracted?" Fred piped up. "You've been 'distracted' since your return."
George was quick to nod. "Yeah. What's gotten into you, Ellie?"
"You're distant..." Cedric spoke up, much to my surprise.
My mouth fell open. "I'm not 'distant' with you guys at all."
"Your mind is always elsewhere," Natalie stated with a stern look. "Whatever is going on, you can tell us you know. You've never not told us stuff before.." She trailed off, smirking slightly when her eyes drifted to Cedric. "..Well, for the most part."
I knew she was referring to the six years that I kept my infatuation with Cedric a secret from him, and I didn't bother stifling the eyeroll at the comment. I could tell by the determination in each of my friend's features that they were determined to get some sort of answer out of me. Perhaps offering them a piece of truth would satisfy them for now.
"I'm sorry.." I pulled my lower lip between my teeth, continuing, "I just.. I guess I'm sort of homesick."
"Homesick?" George quirked a brow. Fred didn't miss a beat as he said, "You are home."
"You've always considered Hogwarts your home. What's changed?" Natalie questioned, her eyes shining with sympathy.
I opened and closed my mouth repeatedly, racking my brain for the correct response. "N-Nothing.. Nothing's changed, Nat. Why would you think something's changed?"
She gave me a disbelieving look. "We're your friends. If something is going on—"
I cut her off mid-sentence. "Nothing's going on." My grip on the pen tightened.
Natalie's eyes widened. "Seriously? Elle, you've been so... weird since you came back. You're flat out lying to us."
"Weird? How have I been weird?" I challenged, folding my arms on top of the table. I could feel myself growing defensive under their scrutinizing eyes.
"You just seem different," Natalie spoke in a soft voice, her expression softening.
I glanced at Cedric after she said that. He had said the same thing to me during my second night back. My stomach churned with anxiety as my eyes flickered amongst my friends.
"..She's right," Cedric spoke up, locking eyes with me. "It doesn't seem like you even want to be around us anymore.."
A gasp flew through my lips, guilt coursing through me. The fact that he thought that hurt my Hufflepuff heart. I looked at Fred and George, who wore matching glum expressions.
"That's... That's not true. I love you guys," I told them, meeting each of their gazes and offering them a sincere smile. "I love you all as much now as I always have. Please don't think otherwise.."
"Prove it," George was quick to say with a cheeky grin.
"How?" I asked him.
"Come to Hogsmeade with us this weekend." His smile broadened. "You can be my and Ced's date."
"Date?" The word rolled off my tongue in disbelief. I was certain he was messing with me, but the idea still made me feel uncomfortable.
"Yeah." George nodded, nudging Cedric with his elbow. Our grey-eyed friend was far from amused, judging by his solemn expression, as the red-headed Gryffindor continued, "Fred and Nat will be far too busy snogging to be of good company. You wouldn't make me and Ced be third wheels, would you, Elle?"
I frowned. Natalie narrowed her eyes at him while Fred chuckled, his shoulders shaking with laughter at his girlfriend's annoyed expression.
"How would you be third-wheeling? You, Ced, Fred, and Natalie make a total of four wheels." I held up four fingers for dramatic effect, wiggling them at George as I flashed him a mocking smile, trying to make light of the situation.
"Oh, wow," Fred's voice was dripping with sarcasm, teasing with a lopsided grin, "They taught you how to count at that Muggle school of yours."
Even I couldn't help but chuckle at that.
"Well, what do ya say?" George asked after our laughter ceased.
I pressed my lips into a thin line, my eyes darting between George and Cedric, who were sporting matching hopeful expressions.
I was plagued with guilt for the second time when I mumbled my response, "I can't. I'm sorry."
Both of their jaws went slack. To my surprise, it was Cedric that responded.
"Can't or won't?" He challenged, his grey eyes glinting in frustration.
Natalie's lips were pursed as she watched the interaction while the twins picked absentmindedly at their snacks.
"I.. can't," I responded, blinking rapidly.
"Why not?" He quirked a defiant brow, leaning back in his seat with a blank expression.
"..I have a lot of stuff I need to catch up on. It was difficult keeping up with my wizarding studies while I was attending a Muggle school," I explained, my mouth running dry under his intense gaze.
It wasn't a lie. I was going to be training with Professor Snape for the majority of the weekend. The Pro-Dueling tour would be starting next week, and I needed to get some practice in before my teammates arrived. So, Hogsmeade was simply out of the question for me.
Cedric scoffed and shook his head. "Yeah.. It was difficult for me to keep up too. You know, considering I was dead for six months."
I was taken aback. Guilt, once again, swept through me, but this time it was for a different reason. I felt unbearably self-centered as I stared at my best friend's crestfallen face— A face, that I realized in that moment, belonged to a stranger. The worst part being that it was no one else's doing but my own. My friend. My best friend. The boy I had grown up with. The boy I had loved since first year. The boy who sacrificed himself to save my life. I had unknowingly distanced myself from him.
I still loved him. I loved Cedric dearly. He would always have a special place in my heart. But I had allowed my own trivial affairs to interfere with my friendships here at Hogwarts. The burden of my heritage had taken precedence. Ensuring that the secrets stayed hidden had taken precedence. Self-wallowing had taken precedence. Focusing on the hollow feeling in my chest had taken precedence.
Tears pricked at my eyes due to the realization. My throat was burning as I fought to keep the tears at bay.
"..Ced, I-I'm so sorry," I whispered hoarsely.
His jaw ticked, and I could have sworn his eyes glazed over. Our friends were looking between us worriedly.
Finally, Cedric met my gaze once more. He offered me a half-hearted smile that didn't quite reach his eyes.
"..It's okay," he breathed out. "It's just.. Everyone changed.. When I found out that I had been... gone.. for that long, I expected as much. Of course, they changed... But.. I guess I was... hoping.." His glossy eyes locked with mine, continuing in a whisper, "..I was hoping that you hadn't..." His voice broke at the end.
My heart broke when a solitary tear slid down his cheek.
"Ced..." I trailed off, trying desperately to think of the right words to say.
Before I could wrap my mind around his comment, he jumped up from the table and stormed away. A part of me thought I should go after him. Perhaps the old me would have. But I had a feeling he needed to be alone right now.
I ran a hand through my hair anxiously and looked at my friends, speaking softly, "I-I.. I didn't mean to change, you guys. I didn't.."
Natalie gave me a forlorn smile and placed her hand on my shoulder in a bid to comfort me. "We've all changed, Elle. Ced is just having a hard time adjusting to how things are now. When he found out Chang was dating Parkinson... It.. really messed him up.."
I sighed as a weight settled on my chest at the reminder.
A moment passed before Fred commented, "He was so happy when he found out you were coming back.."
George absentmindedly picked at an apple, saying, "He was really hoping things would go back to how they were, you know."
Natalie nodded in agreement.
My heart clenched when their comments sunk in. Hurting Cedric was never my intention.
"..You really shouldn't be so distant with him," Fred told me with a sigh.
"I don't mean to be distant," I was quick to say. Really, I didn't.
Natalie placed her hand over my balled-up fist that was lying on the table. "..What we're trying to say is that he just really needs his best friend right now.. He needs you, Elle."
***
"Ced," I breathed out his name before sitting down next to him.
After thinking it over, I decided that perhaps following after him was the right to do.
He was sitting on top of the grassy hill overlooking the lake and staring blankly straight ahead.
I pulled my legs up to my chest and tilted my head to the side as I studied his solemn face.
"..I'm sorry," I whispered, the heartfelt words falling from my lips. "You're right. I've been.. distant. And I'm sorry."
He oh-so-slowly met my gaze. "Can you at least tell me why? Is it because of how things were left between us before I.. died?"
I shook my head fervently, wanting to clear that up right away. "No. Absolutely not. That's water under the bridge, Ced. Like I said."
I was honestly hoping he wouldn't bring it up again.
"..Are you sure?" Skepticism was heavy in his voice as he studied my face. "Maybe we should talk about—"
I was quick to cut him off, my voice firm, "No."
He raised his brows in surprise. Hurt flashed across his face, causing me to grimace.
Immediately, I rushed to correct myself. "I mean.. There's nothing to talk about. It's just.. A lot happened while I was away. I made some really good friends back home, and I.. I guess I just miss them," I admitted, being as honest as possible.
He visibly deflated. "..I see."
I swallowed hard around the sudden lump that had formed in my throat. "Will you forgive me?"
He looked at me with a solemn expression. "For what?"
"For not being the best best friend that I'm supposed to be," I spoke with full sincerity. "I really am sorry, Ced. I promise to do better.."
He ripped his eyes from mine and resumed staring at the black lake. "It's.. It's okay, Elliana.. I just.. I miss you is all.."
My heart clenched at his sorrowful expression. Overcome by the urge to comfort him, I scooted closer to him and rested my head on his shoulder. He stiffened at the contact before releasing a deep breath and laying his head against mine. We sat in companionable silence, gazing at the Black Lake.
I had been a pretty crappy friend since my return, but I was determined to change that. Cedric needed me, and no matter what, I was going to be there for him.
Several moments passed as we stared out at the sunset, leaning against one another.
"...I missed this," he spoke in a voice that was barely above a whisper.
My lips parted in surprise when he turned and kissed the top of my head. Sixth year me would have burst into flames with excitement. I felt my face flush at the thought.
He trailed his fingers through my hair, wrapping a tendril around his finger. I tensed in response before mentally cursing myself. This was Cedric. He didn't mean anything by the gesture. I was certain of it.
Regardless, I pulled away, putting some distance between us before offering him a small smile.
"Come to Hogsmeade," he breathed out, flashing me a crooked grin.
I quirked a brow at him. "I can't, Ced. I—"
He interrupted me, grabbing my hand and giving it a gentle squeeze. "Please, Elliana. You haven't left school grounds since you got back."
I pulled my lower lip between my teeth, staring into his dark gray eyes that resembled a stormy sky. Hope was dancing like fireflies in the depths of his pupils, and I couldn't bring myself to let him down.
"..Alright." I found myself agreeing.
A glorious smile spread across his face, stretching from ear to ear. I haven't seen him smile like that in ages. His happiness was contagious. It always has been. Which was why I returned his smile in full force.
"Who am I to make you and George a third wheel?" I teased.
His smile wavered slightly before stuttering, "N-No. It, um... I was actually hoping it'd be just the two of us."
I furrowed my brows. "I thought you were going to Hogsmeade with our friends?"
I watched, curious, as a blush crept to his cheeks. "I-I mean.. I was.. But I.. I sorta figured we could do something together. You know.. Like we used to.."
Cedric and I hadn't gone to Hogsmeade 'just the two of us' in years. Fourth year to be exact. Since then, we always went as a group with Natalie and the twins. Well, except last year— When he started dating Chang, he chose to break off from the group and hang out with her instead, which was perfectly understandable. I knew all too well the importance of spending quality time with your significant other.
At the reminder, the incessant ache in my chest turned into a stabbing pain, a gasp flying through my lips at the sensation that I tried to cover up with a cough.
Cedric studied me with wary eyes, a hopeful grin playing on his lips as he quirked a brow and said, "..Well? What do ya say?"
Obviously, I couldn't say 'no'. It would hurt his feelings if I turned him down after already agreeing to go 'as a group'. Besides, there's no harm in spending some quality time with my best friend who was miraculously back from the dead. It's as he said— It'll be like old times.
"..Of course," I finally responded, fidgeting with my lower lip. "It'll be just like old times, yeah?"
He flashed me a beaming smile that stretched across his face, causing his silver eyes to dance.
"Great! Yeah..." He trailed off, lightly bumping my shoulder with his in a playful manner. His smile transformed into a smirk as he added, "..Just like old times."