True Confessions
Bill Weasley knew he was an idiot. He knew he had not a shot in the world.
“Narcissa,” he said to the woman who was sitting at her desk in the Black Library, looking through what looked to be hundreds of applications for Mind Healing.
She smiled up at him and his head spun. Damn. It was a wonder he had ever been able to work with her, especially on something so delicate as curse breaking in tandem with mind healing. Of course, it had helped that he hadn’t known he was falling until he was smack against the canyon floor like some muggle cartoon, flattened by the realization, from Tonks of all people…that he was absolutely insanely in love with Narcissa Malfoy. Black. Oh, was he thankful she was Narcissa Black.
“What can I do for you, Bill?” She asked and hell was that a loaded question.
He sat down on the edge of the desk, as close to her he dared to be. “I um, had a few minutes before I have to head back to work. Wondered if there was anything to go over, scheduling wise. Or has the death of Dumbledore made our services…irrelevant.” Bill said, which was not at all what he had planned to say.
“I’m happy to say that, yes. Yes, we are out of a job. Cheers,” she said, offering him a small crystal glass and a decanter bottle.
And damn, if she wasn’t elegant and mannered and everything Bill would never be. He took the glass, unable to resist grazing her fingers with his own as she did so.
“That’s…that’s fantastic,” he said as the liquid flowed smoothly into their glasses. “I just. Wow. It was such a big part of our lives. Bloody weird to let it go.”
“Yes,” she agreed, lifting a glass to clink to his. “But it’s symbolic of a new age. To clarity, surgeon Weasley.”
“To clarity,” he agreed, wishing he could find some, or shit, some brains, because he couldn't talk.
“You know, you worked with mind magic as much as Severus.” She said, studying him with a critical eye. “And by the end of it, you were healing nearly as much as I was. If you ever want to diversify your career path, Bill, I will see to it that you are admitted into an accelerated mind magic and healing program at the hospital. You’re utterly gifted.”
Bill swallowed, willing his brain to remain functional. Her voice was a melody, her eyes were a dark river he could drown in. And hell, she was looking into his eyes and telling him he was not only competent, but gifted. “Well, in that same vein, Narcissa, you were curse breaking by the end there. Gringotts is always looking for good people. I could use a partner.”
She laughed lightly, as he had intended, and leaned back slightly in her chair. “Who knows, Bill. I’m not closing any doors. I’ve got enough traumatized people to counsel for a good decade. After that, I might need a different sort of work to give my mind a break. I will keep you in mind.”
“Good,” Bill said. “I wish you would. Always.”
She tilted her head at him. “What?”
Bill exhaled and leaned forward, hands gripping the edge of the desk. “We’re not going to see each other much, are we?”
Narcissa stared at him, eyes narrowing slightly. “I…I suppose not. Not with as much regularity, anyway.” And maybe he was crazy, but she sounded sad about that. “Of course,” she said, brightening. “Our families are friends. And Draco and I intend to stay here for a while. So, if you come to see Sirius or Harry or we go to your parents to visit…”
“I don’t…I don’t think that’s going to cut it for me, Narcissa.” Bill said slowly, staring in her endless dark eyes, willing her to understand. “I’m…I’m a pretty selfish sort of bloke. I’ve seen what it’s like to have hours and hours with you, days out of every week. And to be honest, it’s been brilliant. But it hasn’t been enough.”
He watched muscles shift in her elegant neck as she swallowed. “Hasn’t it?” She asked and her hands began to shake on her glass.
He let go of the desk and his pride. He took hold of her glass and threw back the last dregs of it before plunking it down on the desk and taking her hands. “Tell me I’m an idiot.” Bill said softly. “And we’ll move on. I’ll pretend this never happened. Hell, I won’t even make things awkward at Christmas. I just need to know, Narcissa. Give me something, here.”
She stared at him, openmouthed, the most shocked he had ever seen her, even in the midst of emergency surgery. “You’re…you’re asking me out?”
“Sure, Cissa. What I’m actually doing is declaring myself in love with you for months and wanting to fucking marry you but let’s go with that. Sounds a little less barking mad.”
“It…it is a little mad.” Narcissa muttered, but she didn’t move away. In fact, she slid the rolling chair just a little closer to Bill. “I…you’ve considered, I suppose, that I was in an illegal marriage, have a teenaged son, was associated with the Dark Lord Voldemort, and am significantly older than you?”
“I’m dirt poor,” Bill said. “Compared with Black or Malfoy money, anyway. I’ve a nice flat. I’ll probably be able to retire comfortably someday if I’m careful. I’m probably supposed to inherit the Burrough, but let’s be honest, Ron is the only one with enough patience to work the farm and deal with all the idiosyncrasies of the old place, so we’ll probably all pass it along to him. I’ve a dangerous job that could literally curse my face off one day. I’m about as posh as a street mutt. And you would have in-laws for days. And my parents are not much older than you. And they’re…Well. You’ve met my parents.”
“I adore your parents,” Narcissa said, studying his face with such intensity that he let himself hope a little.
“What I’m trying to figure out, Narcissa, sweetheart,” Bill said slowly. “Is how you feel about me?”
Narcissa sighed heavily and hung her head. Bill’s heart plummeted to the pit of his stomach. Then, she kissed his fingers, which sent it right back up where it had started. “I wasn’t expecting this.” She muttered, sliding a little closer. “I thought I was being ridiculous.”
“Oh, I like the sound of that, Cissa. Elaborate, please.” Bill tried to breathe.
“You’re just so different, you know?” She murmured. “Worlds apart from what anyone might expect me to be drawn to. God, you’re brash. You’re unconventional. You’re young. Merlin, you’re so young.”
“Fifteen years is nothing, Narcissa. I’ve looked it up and everything. Witches live longer than Wizards. It’ll even out.”
“You’re young and brash and free and kind. Merlin and Morgana, Bill. You’re so kind. You notice everything. Everyone. And try to be of help.”
“I thought this was the part where you’re trying to talk yourself out of me. Kind and free and young sound like good things to me, Cissa. Correct me if I’m wrong.” Bill gave up and tugged her closer, until their hands were resting against Bill’s knee.
Narcissa swallowed again, looking up at him, and hope settled deeply into Bill’s heart. “Do I have a chance?” Bill asked softly. “Can I try to prove to you that I would be good for you?”
A slow smile spread across Narcissa’ face and Bill could have whooped with joy. “You don’t have to prove anything.” She said softly. “I know you would be good for me. Hell. You have been good for me. Spending any amount of time with you has been, well. Healing.”
Bill laughed a little and brought her hands to his lips. “So that’s a yes.” He said softly. “I can date you.”
Narcissa’s hands were trembling in his. “I…is it too forward of me to say that seems…too casual? I’ve already seen you nearly every weekend for nearly a year.”
“Oh, I do like the way you just said that, Lady Black.” Bill drew her even closer and settled her arms around his neck and leaned over her resting his hands on the arms of her chair. “Give me a less casual alternative.”
She was blushing; Narcissa Black was blushing in response to him, Bill Weasley, and he was nearly drunk on the knowledge that she at the very least liked him back. “Perhaps…perhaps…courting? It sounds terribly old fashioned and pureblood…but…”
“I remember learning about it in etiquette class.” Bill said slowly, leaning closer to the pink-cheeked woman. “It’s a little more formal. A short period of dating leading up to…marriage.”
Narcissa was beet red, staring at her lap. “I can understand perfectly if it’s too much or if I’m misreading the situation…”
Bill tilted her chin up and pressed a deliberate kiss to her lips. And Merlin above, they were just as sweet and tempting as he’d been dreaming. “I’d be delighted to court you, Miss Black. Hell, I’d be delighted to ask Lord Grandad to marry us right now, except I don’t want to scare you off.”
“You…you’re really that serious?” Narcissa was wide-eyed, a look that suited her ridiculously well. He had to lean in and kiss her again, slower this time. She sighed into his mouth, slid her hands into his hair, and kissed him back as the kiss deepened into something Bill had been dreaming about for months.
“I’m in love with you, Cissa. I love you; I’m obsessed with you. Hell, I would marry you tonight or tomorrow.”
“Oh,” Narcissa breathed, moving back a little. She stared at him and then at his mouth. “I think…I think I’d like to try courting, first. If that’s alright.”
“We’ll do whatever you want. Please tell me, though.” Bill said slowly as he leaned forward again. “That courting involves kissing.”
Narcissa smiled, eyes focusing on his mouth. “We’ll write it into the handbook.”
Bill kissed his Narcissa until Draco walked in, startled them, and they fell off the desk.