A Happy New Year
1989
Harry was running, running as fast as he could with a broken ankle, which was quite fast seeing as he’s had plenty of practice.
“Get back here, freak!” Dudley’s voice sounded closer than what was comfortable, he could hear him panting and his friends laughing as they chased him.
Mrs Figg. Get to Mrs Figg and he’ll be fine, they won’t chase him into her garden, they didn’t want to be ‘contaminated’ (Piers had learned a new word and now they were all saying that he contaminated everything he touched) by her and her ‘weird cats’.
He could see her gate, just a few more seconds and he’d be safe. Come on just a bit further.
He felt a hand grab the back of Dudley's old shirt and pull him back. No.
“Got ‘im, I got him!” Wallis was, after Dudley, the biggest and strongest of the group. Unlike Dudley he wasn't the biggest because of fat, no Wallis was made of pure muscle, and he used it. Mostly to torment Harry with the others.
He was pulled hard from the shirt, and fell onto his back with a worryingly loud crunch.
“Ha! Knew we’d get him!” Dudley always acts as if he was the one that caught him. He rarely was.
Harry curled up into a ball hoping to at least protect his ribs, especially because of the shooting pain that was making it hard to breathe, must have been what that crunch was. He felt blow after blow, to his back, to his head and hands, to his legs and a few managed to land on his ribs.
His ankle was hurting even worse, he could feel the bones grounding against each other. He could almost imagine the sound it must be making, but all he could hear were the boys' grunts of exertion and their laughter.
It hurts. It hurts. It hurts. Please it hurts.
He wished he wasn’t here, he wished he had never gone for a wander in the park closest to the house. He wished he had just listened to his common sense and had stayed put in his cupboard. He wished he was far away from here.
And he was.
He could feel the difference from the ground he was curled up on before. That was gravel, it stuck into his skin and wouldn’t move unless one of the boys kicked him hard enough that his body was forced to move because of the force.
Grass. He was laying on grass. As he lifted his head tentatively, he saw a few pink daisies scattered in an almost perfect circle.
He shifted so he could sit up with as little pain as possible, and looked around himself.
He knew where he was, he’d been here more times than he could count. No one else ever came here, there was a high fence, with a small hole, separating the walk path from the field. The hole was hidden by brambles and was small enough that only a young child would fit through.
Harry had found it when he was six, running from Dudley. He could fit through easily, getting caught on a few of the thorns but ignoring the small pains easily enough, his cousin hadn’t been so lucky, of course, he’d gotten stuck in the hole with brambles sticking into his face, stopping him from moving to escape the hole.
He’d started crying then, massive, heaving sobs that were so obviously fake that Harry despaired over his family’s intellect whenever they fell for it. They had that time too, drawn in by his obnoxiously loud sobs, they listened intently as his cousin blamed him, Harry watched as his aunt and uncles faces rapidly paled.
He’d accused him of using magic. Of course he did, he knew it would get Harry a beating and he loved it.
He laid his head back down on the, surprisingly hard, grass and tried to catch his breath and push the pain he was feeling back, back, back deep down where he wouldn’t have to acknowledge it let alone feel it.
He was tired, so tired and achy. He knew he shouldn’t fall asleep, his teachers had said so during one of their health and first aid classes last year, he had banged his head when he first hit the ground and then had multiple fists and feet (football shoes too, they hurt so much more than normal shoes) landing hits, mainly on the soft part at the back of his head.
Plus, he’d fallen asleep a few times after his uncle had left him be; after getting the brunt of his uncle's anger, he'd been punched in the head a few times and always had felt ill for weeks afterwards.
“Nea?” A voice, sounding a bit younger than his own nine years, called. She sounded worried. He tried to concentrate on his breathing again as he felt it hitch in his chest and speed up. “Nea? Are you okay? What’s wrong?” Why did she sound so worried? He was fine. Injured but relatively fine. “Nea? Nea, can you hear me? Severus! Somethings wrong with Nea!” Why was she calling him Nea? His name was Harry. Not that he’s always known that, of course. His so-called family had only ever called him ‘boy’ and ‘freak’, so until he was five and started reception, he thought that those were his names. Severus. Mmhm. Who’s Severus? Why does he recognise that name? He doesn’t think he’s ever met a Severus.
“Lily. She’s fine this happens sometimes, but she’s ok.” A different voice, sounding roughly the same age as the first girl. Lily. He knows that name. Where does he know that name from?
“What’s happening?” Good question. What was happening? Why can he hear voices? he’s in the middle of a field, with no one in sight, and the voices sound like they’re right in front of him.
“We’re not really sure, we just know that it happens sometimes. She’s fine Lily.” Lie. That first bit was a lie, but how does he know that? “Domnita. I need you to listen to me, okay? You need to breathe.” Domnita? Who was that? It sounded like the order to breathe was directed at him so, despite still not knowing who these mysterious voices belonged to, he listened. He took a deep breath and held it as best as he could for a few seconds. Before blowing it out in a large sigh of air. “Good, that’s good. Well done. Again. In and out.” Well done. He doesn’t think anyone's ever said that to him before, maybe a teacher at school has once or twice, but it feels nice, to know he’s done well. He does it again, this time able to hold it a few moments more before letting it go. “Domnita. It’s 1967.” What?? No, it’s not it’s 1989. He knows that. “Domnita you are in 1967; Harry is in another time.” What does that mean? How does the boy know his name. “Domnita. I need you to come back please. You’re worrying Lily.” He doesn’t want to worry the nice girl, maybe she is Domnita? But wouldn’t she know? “I’m Severus. Severus Snape, your brother remember?” Severus snape. When she heard that voice all she can see in her mind's eye are the kindest dark brown eyes that she has ever seen. It makes her feel safe. “Come on Nea, father might be back soon.” He sounds worried at the thought of their father coming back.
Well of course he does, if he walked into her staring blankly into space, unresponsive, it would be a beating for sure. Wait what? She doesn’t have a father. He died, aunt petunia said so.
But she does. Tobias snape, was a cruel man always had been, and he would hurt her if he found her stuck in Harry’s ‘memories. She needs to wake up. Severus, her brother always knows her best, drops a hand on her shoulder, she can feel it covering up the feel of a broken ankle and no doubt at least a few cracked ribs. She uses it to slowly ground herself.
“There you are Nea, come back. There we go.” He comforts as she starts the fight back to herself, away from the memories that aren’t really hers, even though they’re in her mind. He’s called her Nea a few times now, he never does that, not unless he’s really worried. It must be later than she thought if he’s so worried about father coming home. Her vision slots back into place, making it so she can see their scarcely decorated living room. The wall paper is peeling. “You can see me? Nea?” Severus again, he’s seen this happen that many times that he knows how to tell if she's coming back. It’s sweet in a way, that he cares enough to learn how to bring her back when needed. They’d ended up in the library looking up ‘stress disorders’ and ‘shell shock’ one day, the nice lady across the road had found her stuck in Harry’s memories once, and when she’d managed to come back, she had told her it reminded her of her husband when he came back from the war. How he’d just go… vacant. They went to her the next day and learned all they could about it from her. She still waves at them when they see her in passing.
“Y-yeah I can see you, I’m fine.” She really was, there was a bit of left over dizziness but that was it.
“Good. Welcome back, idiot.” He smiled as her while saying it so she didn’t take the insult to heart.
“Nea? What was that?” Lily looks worried still, her brow creasing gently.
“Hey Lils, I’m ok I promise. It happens sometimes. I get trapped in... bad memories.” Well, it wasn’t exactly a lie, Harry didn’t seem to have that many happy memories to get stuck in. “Bad memories? But... we’re six, I mean you can’t have that many bad memories yet, right?” Gods, how she wished she only had six years of bad memories to get trapped in.
“I don’t have that many, just a few that like to pop into my head without warning sometimes, I’m alright Lily.” She said like a lying liar who lies, but she couldn’t exactly say ‘oh I’ve got over 3 decades worth or terrible, painful memories that my past self (? Maybe? she still wasn’t sure on that) left me.’
“If you’re sure you’re, okay?” She said shuffling on her sleeping bag a bit in her apparent worry. They were celebrating together tonight. The first, and probably last, time Lily has stayed the night at theirs, usually they stay at hers but her parents were going to a party and petunia was staying at her friends so mother had allowed her to stay with them for the night.
“I am, promise. I’m always alright after them, they don’t affect me that badly.” Liar.
“It’s true, she doesn’t get them that often but when she does, she’s alright.” Oh, look at that, they’re both liars now. From the look on his face, Severus hates lying to her just as much as she does. But they couldn’t tell her, not yet maybe not ever. She can imagine how that conversation would go, just dropping the bomb of, ‘oh yeah, I was a boy once like twenty years from now and you were my mother. Surprise!’ Yeah, because that would go well.
“Ok, if you’re both sure…. Oh! Wait what time is it?” She twisted her body in a way, so fast, that it must have hurt, to look at the dingy little clock they had in their room.
23:57. Three minutes until a new year would arrive.
Their father was probably still at the pub, he wouldn’t return for hours. Huh Severus lied to her to get her out of the memories, sneaky little brat.
“What’s your guy’s New Years resolutions?” Lily bounced on her knees as she asked, as if the impatience of waiting a second for their reply’s was the longest second of her life.
Domnita and Severus looked at each other in confusion, “what’s a New Years resolution?” She asked after a moment of shared confusion.
Lily looked back at them in almost horror, “what do you mean ‘what’s a New Years resolution?’ How can you not know?” She sounded almost offended at the last question.
“Well, I mean, we don’t really do anything for New Years usually. Father goes to the pub, mother goes into their room and reads and we kinda just do... nothing? We’ll stay up to watch the fireworks but that's it really.” Severus looked at her as he said this, she was already nodding her head in agreement.
“Have you two not heard about it in school? Surely, they talk about it?” She still looked confused at their ignorance.
“Maybe? I don’t know, I don’t think I’ve ever heard of it until now. Severus?” It sounded familiar. (Harry in the cupboard under the stairs, watching through a gap at his ‘family’ celebrating. He was going to start the new year hungry, as always. 5. 4. 3. 2. 1. “Happy new year!!!” They all said to each other. “Happy new year Harry.” He whispered to himself.)
“No never.” Severus looked annoyed at not knowing something. Must be torture for him, not being the smartest about a topic for once.
“Ok well, every New Year you come up with a goal for the New Year and you try to keep to it, most people fail at it though. This year mine is to learn more about magic. Which means that you two are going to be answering a lot of questions.” She looked proud of herself for the aforementioned questions they would have to answer.
“Oh ok.” She thought for a moment. She could see Severus doing the same. “I don’t know what mine should be. What do you think?” She looked at Severus and Lily both as she asked this. She could see the panic on Severus’ face, which reflected what she was feeling. They couldn't even do New Year right. They just want to be normal for once.
“You don’t have to figure it out now, or even have one at all. It’s not a rule or law or anything.” Lily tried to reassure them both, also seeing the panic on their faces.
23:59
“Oh, it’s a minute till!” Lily was practically vibrating in her excitement. Her wrist was immediately bought close to her face so she found see the counter on her watch. Domnita and Severus watched on in amusement as her excitement grew. “Come on!” Lily had jumped up and grabbed for both of their arms to drag them to the window. She let go for a second as she struggled with the latch for a moment before opening it, grabbing their hands again and sticking her head out and looking up.
“I love the fireworks the most! They’re all so pretty!” She still hasn’t let go of their arms so they were forced to also stick their heads out of the window to wait for the fireworks. There was a cheer from a few houses down as the clock struck twelve. A few seconds later there was a bang and a streak of light across the sky. “Oooh, look at that! It’s purple! That’s my favourite colour!” She stuck her head out even further, leaning on the window sill.
Looking up at the sky filled with light, Domnita thought of Harry.
Little Harry who spent every New Years, until he went to Hogwarts, stuck under the cupboard under the stairs. Watching his so-called family celebrating. Harry had never had this chance. The chance to celebrate with his friends. He got to spend a few New Years at Hogwarts with the other students who stayed behind and the professors but he never got the opportunity to spend it with his friends. Looking at the two people she loved most, she made a promise. A promise that she would spend every moment she could with her friends, she would celebrate every holiday there was with them, because he never got to. She would enjoy these moments for them both. That would be her New Years resolution.
Severus looked back at her with a smile on his face, an asking look in his eyes. She shook her head at him and moved closer, so she could press herself against him and lean her head into his neck. He wrapped his free arm around her and squeezed in a one armed hug.
She concentrated, aiming a thought to his mind, “Happy new year Severus. I love you.”
He turned his head so that he could press a brief kiss against her forehead and replied, “Happy new year, Domnita. I love you too.” A few moments passed as they rejoined Lily in looking at the flashes of light brightening up the sky. A quiet whisper poked at her mind, “And a happy new year to Harry too.”
She smiled and tried to send a feeling of love towards him, she wasn’t sure it had worked until his arm tightened around her again. She thought back, “happy new year to Harry. Welcome to 1967.”
SOHASSOHASSOHASSOHASSOHASSOHASSOHASSHASSOHASSO
Bye lovelies :)