Chapter 4
Lumina had been receiving endless requests for a podcast episode featuring Arianne and Maeve as partners. The theme? “The One That Got Away” (TOTGA).
The fans were excited—Arianne rarely talked about personal matters. And today? She was about to open up.
The studio lights cast a soft glow on the set. The Lumina members were relaxed, chatting quietly, while the cameras and microphones were being tested. Maeve adjusted her seat and turned to Arianne, grinning.
"Okay, Ari, ready ka na ba?" Maeve teased, nudging Arianne’s arm playfully.
Arianne chuckled, shaking her head. "Hindi ko alam kung bakit ako pumayag dito, pero sige na nga."
The host gave the cue, and the podcast officially began.
"Welcome back, everyone, to another episode of Lumina’s podcast! And today, a very special episode—ang matagal niyong request… Arianne and Maeve!"
The comment section exploded with excitement.
The host continued, "And for today’s topic, we’re talking about… ‘The One That Got Away.’ Or as the fans call it, TOTGA!"
The Lumina members cheered playfully. Maeve smirked, looking at Arianne. "So Ari… meron ka bang ‘The One That Got Away’?"
Arianne hesitated for a moment, then smiled slightly. "Meron."
The members gasped dramatically.
The members gasped dramatically.
"Totoo ba ‘yan?!" Sasha leaned forward, eyes wide.
Arianne laughed, a bit shy. "Oo naman. I mean, lahat naman siguro tayo may ganon, ‘di ba?"
Maeve nodded. "Sige, sige. Let’s hear it. Paano mo siya naging TOTGA?"
Arianne exhaled deeply. For a second, she debated whether to say it or not. But when she finally spoke, her voice was softer, filled with nostalgia.
"We had a dream together."
The room fell quiet, listening intently.
"Pareho kaming may pangarap. We wanted to make it in this industry… sabay kaming nangarap. Sabay kaming nagsabi na we’d never leave each other behind."
She smiled sadly, staring at nothing in particular.
"She used to tell me na isang araw, magiging best P-pop group daw ako. Pero sabi ko, shempre ako yung maging P-pop idol, tapos siya yung magiging actress"
Maeve chuckled. "So pinlano niyo na agad ang future niyo?"
Arianne nodded. "Oo, as in. Alam mo ‘yung feeling na… sigurado ka? Kasi, pareho kayong nandun para sa isa’t isa."
The comments were going wild, but no one knew it was about Celine.
"But life happened," Arianne continued. "Dumating yung opportunity, pero hindi kami sabay. Isa lang ang nakapasok. And… I had to make a choice."
The room felt heavier.
"And I made the wrong one."
Arianne’s grip tightened on the mic, her smile fading.
"I left her behind."
The other members glanced at each other. Maeve, sensing the weight of Arianne’s words, softened her voice.
"Do you regret it?"
Arianne took a deep breath. "Every day."
The fans were curious, emotional, and invested. They didn’t know who Arianne was talking about, but they could feel the pain.
Maeve, ever the curious one, asked the final question.
"Ari, kung kausap mo ang TOTGA mo ngayon… anong sasabihin mo?"
Arianne’s throat tightened. She bit her lower lip, trying to hold back emotions. Her fingers played with the hem of her sleeve—a nervous habit.
For a moment, she said nothing. Then, her voice came out… quiet, but filled with raw emotion.
"Hi." She chuckled bitterly. "Alam ko… up until now, masama ang loob mo sakin. We never had a proper closure. We never had a proper goodbye."
She exhaled shakily.
"Pero gusto ko lang malaman mo… na kasali ka sa reason kung bakit ako nandito ngayon. Kung bakit ako lumalaban."
Her voice cracked, eyes welling up.
"At… sorry."
The members stilled. The fans watching felt the weight of her apology.
"Kasi… hanggang ngayon, wala ka pa ring naririnig mula sakin."
She wiped her eyes quickly, trying to keep her emotions in check.
"Ewan ko eh. Duwag ako. Guilty ako. Kasi alam ko, ako yung may kasalanan."
Maeve placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. "Ari…"
Arianne let out a shaky laugh, looking up. "Pero kahit anong mangyari… sana masaya ka. Kasi yun lang naman ang gusto ko para sayo, ‘di ba?"
The room was silent. Even the playful Lumina members didn’t know what to say.
And somewhere, in a different place, Celine was watching.
Hearing every word.
And feeling everything.
###
The soft hum of the city filled the night air as Celine sat in her car, parked in front of her house. The engine was off, but she made no move to leave. Instead, her phone screen glowed in the dim space, her thumb hovering over the play button.
She had seen the clips. The podcast was trending everywhere. Lumina’s episode on The One That Got Away had fans buzzing with theories.
But she already knew.
She already knew exactly who Arianne was talking about.
With a deep breath, Celine pressed play.
A Voice from the Past
"Hi."
Celine’s grip on her phone tightened.
"Alam ko… up until now, masama ang loob mo sakin. We never had a proper closure. We never had a proper goodbye."
The words hit her like a gut punch.
Closure? Goodbye? They never even had the chance.
She blinked, her vision blurring for a second.
"Pero gusto ko lang malaman mo… na kasali ka sa reason kung bakit ako nandito ngayon. Kung bakit ako lumalaban."
Her jaw clenched.
How dare she say that now?
After everything? After years of silence? Arianne never explained. Never reached out. And now, on a podcast, in front of millions of strangers, she was saying these things?
"At… sorry."
Celine’s breath hitched.
"Kasi… hanggang ngayon, wala ka pa ring naririnig mula sakin."
Exactly.
Celine swallowed hard, pressing her head back against the car seat. Her chest felt heavy, like something was pressing down on it.
"Ewan ko eh. Duwag ako. Guilty ako. Kasi alam ko, ako yung may kasalanan."
Celine let out a bitter chuckle, but there was no humor in it.
"Pero kahit anong mangyari… sana masaya ka. Kasi yun lang naman ang gusto ko para sayo, ‘di ba?"
Celine closed her eyes.
Was she happy?
She should be. She was living their dream. She became an actress—one of the best in the country. She had a name, a career, everything they once talked about.
But why did it feel so… empty?
Why did hearing Arianne’s voice make her feel like she was seventeen again, standing in the rain, waiting for someone who never came?
Memories That Wouldn’t Fade
Her mind pulled her back to that night.
The night Arianne left.
The night she waited, foolishly believing that Arianne would fight for them. That she would choose them.
But Arianne never showed up.
No texts. No calls. No explanation.
Just silence.
Celine had cried until her throat hurt, staring at the message she sent.
“Sabihin mo lang na ayaw mo na. Sabihin mo lang, Arianne. Please.”
But Arianne never replied.
Now, years later, Celine was finally hearing what she had been waiting for—but it was too late.
Wasn’t it?
Celine exhaled sharply, gripping the steering wheel.
Why did this still affect her? Why did Arianne’s words feel like they were tearing open wounds that should’ve already healed?
She had moved on. maybe..
She had built a career.
…Right?
Her phone buzzed with a new notification. It was from Jamie.
"Hoy. Napanood mo?"
"You okay?"
Celine stared at the screen, her thumb hovering over the keyboard.
She wanted to say yes. She wanted to say it doesn’t matter.
But deep down, she knew the truth.
She wasn’t okay.
Not even close.
Celine didn’t know what she was doing.
All she knew was that she was angry.
Angry at Arianne. Angry at herself. Angry at the way her heart still ached when she heard that voice.
And before she could stop herself, before she could even think, she found herself standing in front of Lumina’s building.
Her heart was pounding. Maybe from the adrenaline, maybe from the unresolved feelings that had been buried for years—or maybe from the fact that she was finally going to face Arianne.
Arianne stepped out of the entrance of the parking, her head down, fingers gripping the strap of her bag. She had just finished the podcast, and she looked… exhausted.
But the moment she lifted her head—she froze.
Celine was there.
Standing under the streetlights, arms crossed, an unreadable expression on her face.
Arianne felt her chest tighten.
Celine… She heard it.
Arianne took a sharp breath, gripping her bag tighter. She wasn’t ready for this.
“Celine—”
“Bakit hindi mo sabihin sakin mismo?” Celine’s voice was sharp, cutting through the quiet street like a knife.
Arianne swallowed hard.
Celine stepped forward, closing the distance between them. Too close. Too familiar.
“Bakit kailangan sa podcast?” Celine’s voice wavered, but her eyes were burning with something raw. “Deserve ko malaman yung totoo, right?”
Arianne opened her mouth, but nothing came out.
Because she didn’t have an excuse.
She had spent years avoiding this conversation. Years convincing herself that silence was better—that maybe, if she stayed away, Celine would heal, and they wouldn’t have to relive the pain.
But seeing Celine like this… hearing the way her voice trembled…
Arianne realized just how much damage she had done.
“I…” Arianne’s throat felt dry. “I didn’t know how.”
Celine let out a bitter laugh, shaking her head. “You didn’t know how?”
Arianne clenched her fists.
“I was scared, Celine.”
“Of what?” Celine’s voice cracked, and Arianne hated that she was the reason for it.
“Of facing you.” Arianne finally looked into her eyes. “Of seeing how much I hurt you.”
Silence.
Celine inhaled sharply. “You left.”
“I had to.”
“No,” Celine’s jaw tightened. “You chose to.”
Arianne felt like she couldn’t breathe.
Celine took a shaky step back, like she was trying to put distance between them before she completely broke.
“I waited for you,” Celine whispered, voice heavy with pain. “I begged you to tell me the truth, Arianne. But you never did.”
Arianne’s hands trembled. “If I had told you… would it have changed anything?”
“Yes.”
Arianne’s breath hitched.
Celine’s eyes were shining with unshed tears, but her voice remained firm. “Because I deserved to hear it from you.”
Arianne felt her chest constrict.
“Pero hindi mo ako kinaya, ‘di ba?” Celine let out a bitter laugh, shaking her head. “You couldn’t even face me.”
Arianne felt something sharp twist in her chest. “Celine, I—”
Celine wiped her face quickly, like she was trying to erase any trace of emotion. Like she refused to let Arianne see her break.
Arianne felt like her feet were glued to the ground.
Celine was standing right in front of her, eyes filled with emotions too heavy to name. The tension between them was suffocating—years of unspoken words, unanswered questions, and bottled-up pain crashing down in this one moment.
Celine clenched her jaw, her fists trembling at her sides.
"Ang sakit, Arianne." Her voice wavered, and Arianne swore it felt like a dagger to the chest.
Celine let out a shaky breath, her eyes searching Arianne’s face—desperate, broken.
“Sobrang sakit.”
Arianne swallowed, her nails digging into her palms.
“Minsan iniisip ko…” Celine took a step forward, voice thick with pain. “Naiisip mo rin kaya?”
Arianne’s lips parted, but she couldn’t say anything.
Celine’s voice cracked. “Naiisip mo rin kaya yung sakit na iniwan mo sakin?”
Arianne's breath hitched.
Celine wasn’t yelling. She wasn’t screaming at her in anger.
But the way her voice trembled, the way her shoulders tensed like she was barely holding herself together—it was worse.
Celine let out a bitter laugh, shaking her head. “Yung araw-araw kong tinatanong sarili ko kung saan ako nagkulang?” Her hands curled into fists. “Kung saan ako nagkamali?”
Arianne’s heart clenched painfully.
She didn’t have an answer. She didn’t know how to fix this.
“Na para iwan mo lang ako ng ganun-ganon nalang.” Celine’s voice cracked, and she took another step forward, her eyes burning into Arianne’s.
“Para mo akong inabandona, Arianne.”
Arianne flinched.
Her stomach twisted, her fingers trembling against the strap of her bag.
Because she did.
She left Celine.
She left without a proper goodbye, without an explanation, without anything.
And standing here now—face to face with the person she had hurt the most—she realized just how much damage she had done.
Arianne’s breath was shaky as she forced herself to look at Celine.
“Celine…” her voice barely came out.
Celine let out a sharp exhale, looking away for a second like she was trying to breathe through the pain.
Then, she turned back to Arianne, eyes shining.
“I forgave you.”
Arianne’s heart stopped.
Celine took another deep breath. “Matagal na, Arianne.”
Arianne’s throat tightened.
“Pero hindi ibig sabihin nun, hindi na ako nasasaktan.”
Arianne swallowed, her heart pounding so hard it hurt.
She wanted to say something—to fix this, to fix them.
But what could she even say?
Nothing could take back what she had done.
Nothing could undo the pain she had caused.
And yet… Celine was still here.
Still standing in front of her.
Arianne’s lips parted, her voice barely above a whisper.
“Celine… I’m sorry.”
Celine let out a breathless laugh, shaking her head. “Ngayon mo lang sinasabi yan.”
Arianne’s hands trembled.
“I’m sorry,” she repeated, voice breaking.
Celine looked at her for a long moment—too long, too heavy.
Then, she stepped back.
And Arianne swore it felt like the ground beneath her cracked.
“I don’t know if that’s enough.” Celine’s voice was quiet, but firm.
Arianne’s chest ached.
But she understood.
Because maybe—**just maybe—**some wounds didn’t heal with just an apology.
And this?
This was a wound she left open for too long.
Celine sat in the backseat of her car, staring out the window, but she wasn’t seeing anything. Her mind was stuck— stuck in the past, stuck in Arianne.
She hated how just one conversation could bring her back to this—to feeling like the girl who was left behind.
She had spent years trying to move on, convincing herself that she was okay, that she had already accepted everything. She forgave Arianne. She really did.
But why did it still hurt?
Why did looking into Arianne’s eyes feel like pulling open an old wound, one that never really healed?
Celine clenched her fists on her lap, trying to steady her breathing.
"I don’t know if that’s enough."
She didn't mean to say that.
But the truth was, she didn’t know what she wanted to hear from Arianne.
Would an apology really make things better? Would knowing Arianne regretted it change anything?
Celine closed her eyes.
The answer was no.
Because no matter how much she wanted to hear the truth, it wouldn't erase the years of waiting, of wondering, of being left in the dark.
A shaky sigh escaped her lips.
Maybe there were no right words for this.
Maybe some pain just stayed with you.
Arianne stood frozen in the parking lot, still in the same spot where Celine left her.
Her heart was racing, her hands still trembling from the confrontation.
Celine’s voice still echoed in her head, over and over again.
"Para mo akong inabandona, Arianne."
Arianne sucked in a sharp breath, pressing a hand to her chest.
She deserved it.
She deserved everything Celine said.
But nothing could have prepared her for how much it would hurt to actually hear it.
She thought she was ready—thought she had accepted that Celine had every right to hate her.
But seeing the raw pain in Celine’s eyes?
Hearing the crack in her voice?
It made Arianne realize just how deep her mistake had been.
She wanted to chase after Celine.
She wanted to explain, to finally tell the truth.
But she knew... it wouldn’t change anything.
"Ngayon mo lang sinasabi yan."
Arianne let out a bitter chuckle.
She had so many chances to reach out before. So many nights where she picked up her phone, typed out a message, and then erased it—too much of a coward to face Celine again.
She waited too long.
Now, Celine didn’t even know if her apology was enough.
And maybe… it really wasn’t.
Arianne lifted her gaze to the night sky, blinking back tears.
Because she knew—deep down, she might’ve lost Celine forever.