Bail, a phone call, and rich people with problems
"...you did what now?"
"I punched him."
"You punched a guy, just because-"
"He called me a faggot. Simply because I was wearing nail polish. Can you believe that, Lils? There's still people like that out there."
"Yeah- Yeah, that's terrible and all, but right now that's not the point, Remus."
"Why? Frankly, I think that justifies it. He deserves it, he was a fucking idiot."
She sighs.
"It doesn't matter wether or not you think he deserved it. You can't just go around punching people. You're a private inspector, you're supposed to have a clean criminal record."
"Oh, please. As if that's ever fucking stopped me."
"Well, it should."
"Yeah, no shit, Sherlock."
"Fuck you, Watson."
He chuckles and grins.
"Thank you."
"...you're welcome. You should be glad that you have such an amazing lawyer such as myself."
That makes them both laugh.
--------------------
Six months before
*ring ring ring*
"Hello, Miss Sherlock."
He could practically hear her roll her eyes.
"Oh, shut up."
"Aww, but why? It's so much fun annoying you, Lils."
"...alright, next time I'm not bailing you out anymore."
"You say that every time, you know. I call bullshit."
"Alright, anyways-"
"Right...why did you call? Aren't you working?"
"I am."
"Still helping your sister with her divorce?"
"Yup. It's harder, because they have a child together. And also, Vernon doesn't exactly make little money..."
"And he's also an asshole."
"Okay, now- I wouldn't have said that-"
"I know, that's why I'm saying it."
She sighs.
"Alright, anyways. I called you, because...well...I know usually this goes the other way around, but...I have a client for you."
He perks up.
"Oh really? Do tell."
"She's...well, it's a long story. She's been my client for a few years now, technically, even though nothing's ever really happened, but now..."
She hesitates for a few seconds.
"You know what, I think I'm just gonna send her over to you. You don't have a case right now, do you?"
"No, I don't. Send her over."
"Alright, I will. Thanks, Remy."
"Don't call me tha-"
Aaaand she hung up already.
Great.
Well, let's see what this 'client' is like.
Lily is usually never so mysterious, so he's slightly suspicious.
But also, he's way worse himself, so...he won't judge.
Half an hour later.
Paperwork. Endless Paperwork. He hates it, but he has to do it.
Just...get your shit together, Remus.
Lily tells him that daily.
*Ding*
The door opens, and into his office walks a dark skinned, dark-haired, perfectly styled woman, short, about as tall as his sister, maybe a few centimentres taller. If he had to guess, he'd say about 1,60 m. Her voliminious dark brown corkscrew curls are packed into a neat bun at the top of her head, her bangs falling onto her forehead and bouncing with every step she takes.
She looks at him, and-
Wait-
She seems familiar.
Is that-
Mary MacDonald??
"Hello, Sir. You're Mister Lupin, I suppose?"
"Yeah, that's me. But you can also just call me Remus, Miss...?"
Right, very subtle.
"MacDonald. Mary MacDonald."
Oh, it's her, alright.
"Well, Mrs. Black, actually, but that's what I'm working on changing right now. That's why I'm here. Lily recommend you."
"...well, I'm flattered, but if you're working on a divorce, you might need to go back to Lily."
She chuckles softly.
"Well, yes. I'm aware you're not a lawyer, but rather a private inspector. Still, I need your services."
She speaks very posh, and it's only now that Remus notices a slight scottish accent she's doing a good job at hiding. Still, it's there.
"Well...sit down, then. How can I help you?"
She sits down at his desk in front of him, crossing her legs. She's wearing high heels, a short, black dress and a fur coat. Either she just attended a very fancy party, or that's just how rich people walk around.
And either way, he wouldn't know.
He's upper middle class at best.
He grew up on a farm, goddamnit.
"Well, I assume you're aware of my current...relationship situation?"
Oh, and how he is.
He doesn't think that anyone in the whole of UK does not know about it.
Mary MacDonald, officially Mary Black, gorgeous, rich model, married to Sirius Black, heir to 'the most ancient and noble House of Black', the probably richtest family in the whole UK - except for maybe the royal family. Even then, they do claim to be related to them anyway. Through William the Conquerer. They are part french, but...we're not going to get into the historical implications of that.
Back to the Blacks.
Sirius Black, the heir. Not the oldest, no, three older cousins. But they're all women. And the values of the Black Family are...questionable, at best. Many people have susptected that he's not...straight, exactly, but, hell, he's married, has been for 5 whole years now, so who are they to question?
But then again that would explain why she's here.
"Yes, I am."
"Right...I'm just going to get straight to the point, alright? I am convinced he's cheating on me."
Ah.
That's...also something.
"And I want you to collect prove of that. Things I can use in the divorce."
Right. Makes sense.
"I will pay you, of course. As much as you need, just, please-"
"Well, we can discuss that later. I only take payment after I have done my job, if I could find something valuable."
"...seriously?"
"...yes?"
"That's...very stupid. You could be making so much more money."
He shrugs.
"Well...alright then."
He nods slowly.
"So, will you help me?"
"Oh, uh- yes, of course."
"Great."
She takes out a piece of paper from her small, black handbag and hands it to him.
It's her number.
"Unfortunately, I have somewhere I need to go now. But we can discuss the details later. Just call that number sometime between 7 and 9 p.m., and I should pick up."
She stands up again, and dusts herself off, even though she couldn't have been sitting there more than five minutes.
Rich person thing again, maybe.
"Thank you in advance already. You don't know how much you're helping me with this."
Though she's continuing to sound posh and professional, he can hear genuine reliefe and gratitude in her voice.
"It's no problem at all, Miss."
"Mary, please."
She smiles.
"Goodbye, Remus."
"Goodbye, Mary."
He watches her walk out of the door again.
What an odd situation.
But, alas, he has a job. And he's never one to say no to money.