Chapter 1
Sirius went to his room for bed after Remus had already turned in for the night to his own room. Sleep, a rather boring task, if it was up to him he wouldn’t ever sleep.
He drifted off into a hellish dreamscape. It was like his brain was trying to make him remember. it came in flashes to him. His mother, his childhood? Then stopped on one particular memory. The night his mother, for the first time, left him half dead on the cold concrete floor of the basement.
He bolted upright, breathing heavily and clutching the fabric on his chest. He was breathing heavily. His head and heart felt like they were exploding into small, fragmented pieces of what it once was.
The sun was barely up and decided to go to the garden. He had frequent dreams like these as of late so he went to the only place he knew would ease his mind and let him calmly process everything. The egg-like shaped chair that was big enough for him to lay in and watch the sunrise through the glass surrounding the garden. It helped him think, keep him from having a panic attack while he thought of these fragments of memories that were once intact and whole. He hadn't realized he had forgotten so much.
Was there something wrong with him?
｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆
As the sun crept lazily over the horizon, painting the sky in hues of red, yellow, orange and pink, Remus too found himself drawn to the peaceful sanctuary of the garden having a feeling Sirius was there. Upon entering, his thoughts were confirmed. The werewolf spotted Sirius curled up in the hanging chair, knees drawn to his chest as he stared vacantly at the rising sun, his eyes glossed over with his eyebrows furrowed.
Remus approached quietly, not wanting to disturb Sirius. He sits down on the stone bench nearby, watching the sunrise and observing Sirius's peaceful, pensive expression.
"You're up early," he says softly, his voice barely above a whisper.*
“I'm going to take a wild guess here and say you couldn't sleep?”
Ah Remus, the ever caring werewolf spotting even the slightest bit of emotion. He could read Sirius like a book.
Sirius hummed, not even talking to Remus. He didn't need to look to know Remus was near him. Just out of his view before he had to move his eyes or turn his head.
“Bad night” Sirius had muttered out.
His dream was replaying in his mind, over and over like a short film set on automatic replay. He didn't get it, how had he forgotten one of the worst moments of his childhood?
Remus sits down on the edge of the chair, close enough to Sirius to be within his peripheral vision but not so close that he'd have to turn his head to see him. He watches as Sirius's expression remains distant.
“Do you wanna talk about it? You don't have to if you don't want to, Siri” Remus's tone was caring. No malice or irritation present.
Sirius had shook his head finally, his now dry eyes coming back more into the present. Sirius didn't know whether to nod or shake his head. He decided to just nod, a simple gesture. He didn't want to talk about it right now. He knew they would at some point, Remus was the ever sneaky one somehow always found a way to bring it up.
Remus nods, understanding the unspoken request for silence. He sits with Sirius for a moment longer, offering his quiet companionship before standing up and heading back inside. He returns a few minutes later with a tray holding two cups of tea and a plate of toast.
Noticing Sirius's lack of interest in the toast, Remus sets the tray down carefully, then settles back onto the edge of the chair. He takes a sip of his tea, watching Sirius's face closely. The tension in his features is becoming more pronounced.
"Headache?" Remus said with a worried tone.
Sirius nodded, taking a sip from his tea. He had always hated getting headaches or migraines but really never told anyone, he didn't have to. Plus, he didn't want to inconvenience anyone with such an easy-fix thing.
Remus frowns, setting his tea down. He reaches out, gently placing his hand on Sirius's forehead, checking for temperature. Finding none, he pulls his hand back, his expression thoughtful.
"Have you had them often, recently I mean?" He asks, his voice low and concerned.
Remus assumes the answer was yes but he didn't want to do that, assume. He wanted to hear it from Sirius himself, verbal or nonverbal either is ok.
Sirius nodded. It was a reappearing thing for him as of late. Clearly his mind getting flooded with memories it knew he had but couldn't remember was turning the headache switch on. He felt almost hungover this morning. It was a weird feeling when his body was so tired but yet so awake at the same time.
“I'm thinking you already knew that though” Sirius mumbled, taking another sip from his tea.
Sirius much preferred coffee especially in the morning but he didn't want to waste a good tea Remus took time to make
“Woah, Sirius black thinking? That's new” Remus said in a joking manner.
Sirius nudged his shoulder with his own, a small smile appearing on his face.
Remus smiles before a frown appears on his face as he watches Sirius nod. He's beginning to piece things together - the headaches, the distant looks, the sudden memories that seem to be surfacing lately. He stands up, grabbing the tray.
"Come on," He says kindly yet firmly,
Sirius quickly grabbed Remus’s hand.
“Moony, where are we going”
Oh, He was being led to the living room. He should’ve known that. Oh how he would love to just lay his head down in Remus’s lap, fingers running through his hair with a movie playing softly in the background, simply there so the room wasn't uncomfortably silent.
Sirius was guided to sit down, Remus grabbing a blanket from the back of the couch. He motioned for him to moved over and he did. Sliding over to sit next to Remus and getting cozy.
Remus played a movie they've already seen a hundred time but neither of them cared. They were just glad to be there for each other.
Sirius rested his head on Remus's shoulder paying more attention to Remus then the movie. Remus was so kind to him. He felt like he didn't deserve it.
That's when a long forgotten memory hit him.