Chapter 21
Alec kept his head down as he approached the set of stairs that led from the seventh floor corridor to the dungeon. He ignored the throbbing pain that continued to emanate from his hand. The gentle snoring of the surrounding portraits cut through the silence of the night.
Behind him, the Hufflepuff heard the soft creaking of the door, which formed the entrance to the Astronomy Tower. If he quickened his pace, he could turn the next corner before Magnus noticed him.
The bend ahead of him was suddenly illuminated by the distant light of a wand. It was well past the curfew, and no student was to be found outside their own bed. Whoever was patrolling this corridor was going to come face to face with Alec in just a few seconds.
If he got himself into detention now, his parents would probably disown him or worse. And Magnus, no doubt walking towards his doom unaware, would not fare much better. Perhaps he had become too careless, since he had easily avoided patrols in his previous escapades.
Alec made a split-second decision. Without hesitation, he launched himself into a mad dash back the way he just came. Behind him, he heard Professor Morgenstern's angry voice. “Stop right there! I can hear you. It's the middle of the night! You ought to be in bed at this hour!”
The words served only to spur Alec on. With a great leap, he reached a completely bewildered-looking Magnus and yanked him along, grabbing him by the wrist. Stumbling, the Slytherin tried to keep up with him, no easy task considering Alec's long legs.
“Running is pointless! You're only making this worse for yourself,” Professor Morgenstern sneered. “I'll find you either way.”
Alec swore under his breath as he rushed down the corridor, Magnus in tow. He was still trying to figure out how to escape from their potions teacher. The way to the common room was blocked. Desperate, Alec scanned the area for a quick escape. His heart was beating so fast, he was afraid it would burst out of his chest.
His eye fell on an unassuming wooden door that he had never noticed before. He seized his chance. Alec flung the door open, pushed Magnus into the cramped room and leaped in after him. When the door closed behind them without a sound, he noticed Magnus flailing helplessly, about to stumble and give away their hiding place with a loud thud.
Unceremoniously, Alec seized him by the collar and pushed him against one of the dusty shelves that lined the storeroom. With his free hand, he muffled the surprised yelp that escaped Magnus's mouth.
“Not a sound,” he whispered urgently, his lips mere millimeters from Magnus's ear. “Then we might stand a chance.”
“I know you're here somewhere.” Professor Morgenstern's voice was much closer than before. Alec held his breath as the footsteps paused right outside the door. “I could have sworn I saw something over here,” he murmured, irritated.
Alec was sure that in a few seconds he would push open the door to take a look into the narrow broom cupboard. Bristling with tension, he shielded Magnus with his body in a feeble attempt to protect him from the imminent danger.
The door, however, remained closed. After what felt like an eternity, Professor Morgenstern's footsteps receded. Alec didn't dare to breathe again until the sound of the footsteps had faded into the distance.
*****
Magnus' brain did a backflip, his stomach turning into a gooey pulp. Or maybe the other way around, he wasn't sure. Forming a coherent thought was almost impossible.
It was probably an exceptionally bad time to be thinking about how Alexander's large palm felt over his mouth. Or how Alexander's heated breath ghosted over his earlobe. And because it would be quite inappropriate, Magnus failed to register the warmth that Alexander's body radiated.
Standing jammed up against Alexander in a tight broom closet didn't faze him at all. Or feeling the firm muscles through the thin fabric of the school uniform – damn Quidditch training. And if Magnus Bane's blood rushed to his cheeks, it was no one's business. It was dark enough to obscure the blush on his face. Alexander had no business being this attractive manhandling him.
Magnus had still not fully recovered from his initial shock when Alexander let out a sigh of relief and lowered his hand. It was hard to swallow his disappointment. He'd missed the sensation of Alexander's fingers on his skin.
“That was close.” Alexander murmured, still out of breath, making no effort to put more distance between them. “I thought we were done for.” It was bound to be a figment of his imagination, yet it appeared as though the closet had grown even smaller. They had no choice but to remain in their positions.
“Impressive reflexes, darling,” Magnus whispered back. “Thank you for saving me. Professor Morgenstern's detention is an absolute nightmare. Let me know how I can repay you.”
Was this a very inappropriate moment to flirt with Alexander? Possibly. But he felt Alexander's quick heartbeat, heard how he drew in a breath when Magnus shifted his hips. Their predicament was definitely not leaving him cold either.
“Comes with being a keeper,” Alexander replied in a low voice, as if that explained his behaviour. “I wasn't going to let you walk into Professor Morgenstern's arms, that's for sure.” His eyes kept wandering to Magnus‘ lips. He seemed to struggle with himself, wondering what his next move should be.
“What can I say, I much prefer your arms,” Magnus joked, waggling one eyebrow.
Definitely a bad time. He couldn’t help himself.
“Stop flirting with me, Magnus.” Alexander shook his head and sighed deeply.
During their confrontation on the astronomy tower, Alexander had demanded that Magnus stay away from him. Something had happened during the Christmas holidays that had set him on this course.
Yet here they were, all on their own in a dark room and Alexander's presence had him reeling. So Magnus didn't mind enjoying the moment as long as he had the chance.
“I am just making polite conversation.” Magnus insisted.
“Of course you are.” Alexander mumbled, resigned.
Magnus had no intention of spooking him, so he was very careful when he let his hand glide over Alexander's shoulder blade. He felt the muscles in Alexander's back tighten under his fingertips, but he didn't flinch as he had done before. A small smile spread across his face as Alexander began to relax under his gentle touch.
“Darling,” Magnus purred, his fingers inching their way along Alexander's spine to the short hairs at the nape of his neck. “I don't want to push you into anything you don't want to do. And I understand that you don't want to see me anymore. But that can wait until tomorrow morning. So, if you feel the same way I do, I'll need to hear you say it.”
A choked sound escaped Alexander's throat as Magnus pushed a hand under his chin. Even in the semi-darkness, Magnus could tell how dilated his pupils were. “Well?” Magnus asked again. “What will it be?”
“Magnus” Alexander gasped, the name sounding like a prayer on his lips. “Please.”
“Please what, darling?” Magnus had to stifle a chuckle as he pulled Alexander's head down a little towards him. “Cat got your tongue?”
Without a word, Alec wrapped a hand around the back of Magnus's neck and kissed him with an intensity that made Magnus's knees go weak. He was glad he could lean on the shelf behind him, otherwise he might not have been able to stay upright.
While he might not have had much experience, Alexander more than made up for it with his fervour. When Magnus opened his lips to gasp for air, Alexander deepened the kiss and slid his tongue into his mouth.
Alexander Lightwood had made it his mission to take Magnus apart. Piece by piece. He seemed to savour every intake of breath, every gasp, every quiver. Willing to explore until he found the most sensitive spot.
“I told you not to flirt with me.” He huffed, clearly satisfied with himself. Who could have known that Alexander was this bossy? Not that Magnus was complaining.
When Alexander's mouth found its way to his neck, Magnus had to bite his lip so hard that he was afraid he would taste blood. He found himself no longer able to process thoughts, his head helplessly lolling against the shelf behind him.
“Cat got your tongue?” Alec whispered, planting feather-light kisses on Magnus's throat. “Not so chatty anymore, I see.”
Magnus answered with a ragged gasp as Alexander's tongue traced the side of his neck. Panting, he grabbed Alexander's shoulders for support. He knew that Alexander was toying with him, pushing his buttons until catching his breath became impossible.
Once Alexander started to undo Magnus's tie with practised movements and began to unbutton the first few buttons of his shirt, Magnus found himself completely lost. He had no control over the sounds that spilled over his lips.
Alexander's breath on his collarbone, his large palms on Magnus' feverish skin, thumb sliding under his waistband, Magnus succumbed to the feeling of having Alexander's full attention. If this was wrong, why did it feel so good?
Just for one night he could pretend that tomorrow would never come.
*****
Alec didn't regain control of his body until he considered dropping to his knees to get better access to the smooth skin of Magnus' stomach. A painful twinge in his chest served as a reminder that it was a terrible idea to kiss Magnus in a dark closet after warning him to stay away.
All this would only confuse Magnus even more. By Merlin, it was confusing him, too. He couldn't afford for the Slytherin to ask too many questions. How had he let it come to this? Did he really have such little self-control? Did his word count for nothing?
One look at Magnus's half-closed eyelids, his slightly parted lips, confirmed Alec's assumption. The feeling of being so close to Magnus, even if it would be the last time, was breathtaking. And yet Alec knew that he couldn't go too far. He had to set a boundary, draw up his walls again, else he wouldn't be able to let go of Magnus.
With a heavy heart he lifted his hand and let his fingertips gently glide over the contours of Magnus' cheek. He tried to imprint this moment on his mind, to remember its every detail. He would need the memory of Magnus to get through the next days, months, years of his life. In his darkest hour, the scent of sandalwood would remind him of the glittering Slytherin, who had given him hope of a better future. At least for a few weeks he had believed in it.
“Alexander?” Magnus murmured, opening his eyes in confusion. A strange expression crossed his face. He had noticed the change in Alec's behaviour by now. ‘Is everything alright?’ His voice sounded hoarse, still a little winded.
“I'm sorry,” Alec replied quietly. “I shouldn't have done that. There can be no future for us.” He placed a gentle kiss on Magnus‘ forehead. It broke his heart to straighten up and lower his hand. “Take care, Magnus.”
Magnus sighed in resignation. ”Please don't go. I know you don't owe me anything.” He tried to close the distance between them. “But as long as I know you're not safe, I can't rest easy.”
“You don't have to worry about me. I can take care of myself,” Alec objected stiffly. “And remember: this means nothing. It's best if you forget this ever happened.” With gritted teeth he pushed past Magnus and stepped into the quiet corridor. This time, too, he didn't look back. Each step forward ached more than the one before.
*****
Alec felt the floorboards of the dining room under his shoulder blades. The metallic smell of silver polish and fresh blood filled his nostrils. Patches of darkness swirled and coalesced into shadowy shapes.
“You were always a disappointment to this family.” It was his mother's voice, her face expressionless and cold.It hovered above him like a pale ghost, even when he closed his eyes. “I wish you had died in his place that night. If it hadn't been for you, Max might have survived.”
Crucio
A sea of pain threatened to drown him. His lungs filled with liquid fire. He couldn't breathe, couldn't scream.
“You're not my son,” Robert Lightwood sneered. “You're always talking about protecting your siblings. Yet in the end, you're a coward. What value does your pain have when you ultimately fail? How can you possibly protect them?”
Crucio
His back arched in agony. There was no way to escape the flash of red light.
Jace knelt on the ground next to him, a look of pity in his golden eyes. “You'll always be in my shadow. I was always the better son. They'll never love you. So responsible, so willing to take the blame for everything. No matter what you do, you'll never be good enough.”
“No…” Alec murmured, trying to pull himself up. “No, that's not true.” No matter how hard he tried, his body didn't move an inch. It was as if he had ordered a stone to move.
Isabelle laid a hand on Jace's shoulder, her black hair merging with the darkness. “He's not worth it. Far too boring.”
Magnus stood before him. The shirt of his uniform hastily unbuttoned, just as he had last seen him. The corner of his mouth curled down in a cruel frown. “You disgust me!”
“No, please…” Alec called to him. “Not you too.”
A green light filled his field of vision. Somewhere someone cried out.
*****
Alec woke up in a cold sweat. The thin fabric of his shirt stuck to his clammy skin. Every breath threatened to exacerbate the constricting feeling in his chest. After a brief struggle with the tangled sheets, Alec stumbled towards the small bathroom.
He was glad that he had cast a silencing spell on the thick curtains of the four-poster bed. At Lightwood Manor, there had been no reason to hide his recurring nightmares. Badrey knew about them anyway. But here he had to be careful. Andrew would certainly not let him off the hook that easily. A quick glance to the side confirmed that his best friend was still snoring peacefully in his bed.
With trembling fingers, Alec turned on the tap, splashing freezing water over his face. He winced as his swollen knuckles came into contact with the jet of water. Purple bruises stood out clearly on his pale skin. He would take care of that later.
An unsteady movement of his hand sent a gush of water over his sweat-soaked shirt. Cursing under his breath, he tried to dry himself with a towel, but it was no use. Drenched and still unsettled by his dream, he tiptoed back to get his Quidditch gear. He wouldn't be able to get any more sleep this morning anyway, so he might as well use his time in a productive way.
Perhaps the burning in his muscles would bring him relief from his circling thoughts.
*****
Freshly showered and utterly exhausted, Alec dragged himself to the Great Hall three hours later. Isabelle was waiting for him at the breakfast table with a scowl on her face. Despite her casually crossed legs and elbows on the table, Alec had no illusions about her intentions. His sister had come to interrogate him. Just as Alec was about to sneak away unseen, someone put a firm hand on his shoulder.
Alec spun around, startled, to be confronted by Jace's triumphant smile. “Not so fast. We still have things to discuss.”
The blond Gryffindor beckoned Isabelle to join them. They had conspired. Of course. Andrew and Simon had put their heads together, whispering while glancing over at him discreetly every now and then. Were they also part of this conspiracy against him?
Before he knew it, he was flanked by his two siblings and dragged out of the great hall. All his protests were ignored. Although he could have wriggled out of their grip and fled, Alec was too worn out and secretly glad to see Isabelle and Jace. It had been too long since they had spent time together.
The courtyard was almost deserted at this time of day. It wasn't hard to find a secluded corner under a stone archway. Isabelle and Jace positioned themselves in front of him so that he had his back against the wall. Their plan was to cut off his escape routes. Alec had to suppress a smirk when they crossed their arms over their chests at the same time. They had probably watched one of those crime series with Muggle Aurors during the Christmas holidays, the kind Andrew was so fond of. If they thought they could intimidate him, they had their work cut out.
“Alec” started Jace. “You look like you've just met a horde of Dementors.”
“Charming as ever.” Alec raised an eyebrow. Did he really look that awful? ’Not everyone can spend their holidays in the Maldives.’
“If you don't start telling us what happened soon, I'll be forced to hex you, Alec, for real this time.” Isabelle threatened. The fiery expression in her dark eyes would have brought others to their knees, but Alec knew his sister too well.
“You wish.” Alec sighed and ran his hand through the short stubble on the back of his neck. He really had to stop doing that. People would think he was an old man.
He had planned to mention Lydia at a later date, but there was probably no good time for such news. “Mother and Father were serious this time. I'm getting married during the summer holidays. Lydia and I met at the Ministry Christmas party. The engagement will be announced soon.”
Jace burst out laughing. He pressed his hands firmly against his ribs while tears of laughter glistened in the corners of his eyes. “That really is your best prank yet. The hair, the outfit... I completely bought that something was up. You missed your chance to become an actor. It's good that we've cleared that up. We were really worried.”
Isabelle, on the other hand, had gone deathly pale. Not a sound escaped her mouth.
After a moment, she seemed to regain control of her body and seized Jace's arm. “I don't think this is a joke,” she hissed angrily. “Get a hold of yourself.”Then she fixed her murderous gaze on Alec. “Are you out of your mind? What do you mean, you're getting married over the summer? What about Magnus?”
Alec forced himself to swallow the bitter taste in his mouth. “I believe congratulations are the correct response to such an announcement. Can't you at least be happy for me?”
“What is there to be happy about?” Isabelle had long since exceeded a conversational volume. “Alec, you can't let them do this to you. You don't have to do everything they say.”
“If you explain to them –”Jace now intervened.
“I can and I will,” Alec interrupted him, dangerously calm. “And now please spare me your moral concerns. After all, you weren't against me taking the blame for your regular rule violations either.” He pushed past his siblings on his way to the great hall. This time they didn't stop him.