Chapter 2
10 September 1976
To put it simply, Remus was struggling. His whole life he had been told that his lycanthropy was something that would ruin his life if anyone knew. He made sure to tell no one. He became isolated and miserable. That was until he went to Hogwarts, where he made friends despite his reluctance. When his friends found out he expected that he would be expelled, but they didn’t care. They even became animagi to help him.
Remus now knew that if anyone knew his secret, it would ruin his life. Because it already has.
Since he got back from summer, he had been distancing himself from all of his friends even more. Even the ones who had no idea what was going on. He spent the summer alone, while his Dad went on yet another holiday with his current girlfriend. During his solitude, he realised that it would be best to remain that way. It is what would be the safest.
Remus did try to put all of his past behind him, to move on and accept this, and go back to how things were before Hogwarts. The problem was he had grown used to having friends, and it seemed almost impossible to go back to such a lonely existence, when he knew he could be so much happier.
He couldn’t let that stop him though. He couldn’t.
That night was another sleepless one. This was not an unusual occurrence. He listened to the silence that surrounded the dorm room. If he listened closely he could hear the sleeping sighs of his dorm mates. The coast was clear.
As usual, on these kinds of nights, he gets up, and goes to his normal spot, bringing the map with him. It's a secluded area, just outside of the forbidden forest. There are enough trees for it to feel sheltered, but he can still get a good view of the sky.
However, something wasn’t normal that night. Sitting in the same spot that Remus had found himself in many times throughout the past few months, was none other than Regulus Black.
Remus wasn’t annoyed by this, weirdly. In theory he should be, but he can’t find himself to care when the younger boy is so obviously upset. Remus walks over to him and puts his arm around him. It mirrored the way Regulus had done just earlier that day in the library. Regulus seemed to be surprised by his new company, but he didn't push Remus’ arm off.
“Are you going to tell me what’s wrong?” Remus asks “I feel like you owe me a secret”
Regulus thought about this for a minute, ultimately deciding that Remus was right.
“I used to love the summer, I would spend it with Sirius, we would have so much fun” Regulus says quietly, “Things were still difficult but we would have each other”
“I think I just miss him” Regulus adds on, almost a whisper.
“I know how that feels,” Remus says, a bitter twist in his voice. He wishes he didn’t miss Sirius, he couldn’t help it.
Regulus looks up at him, assessing.
“Are you going to tell me what really happened then?” Regulus asked.
Remus sighed “He told Snape about… me”
“That’s not all though, is it?”
“He also told him how to get to me on the full moon”
“Wouldn’t that have killed him?” Regulus asked, not believing that his brother was capable of something like that.
“Exactly” was all Remus said.
“Would have made Mother proud, she hates the Snapes” Regulus snorts
Remus laughs at this, but it wasn’t a hysterical laugh, like he had done earlier, it was genuine. It was probably the first genuine laugh that he had experienced in a while. Regulus laughs as well. They probably both needed this.
Remus couldn’t quite believe what was happening, but he knew that he was enjoying it, he knew that Regulus was the only person who had actually provided him with some kind of effective comfort.
They stayed like that for a while, not saying anything. They each stared at the sky, Remus was looking at the moon, whilst Regulus was eyeing a very bright star thoughtfully.
Eventually they each had to go back. It was still dark, but the sun would rise soon. Remus gets into bed and actually sleeps, and for the first time in many months, there was a distinct lack of nightmares.
11 September 1976
When he woke up the dorm was empty, Remus took the opportunity to quickly get dressed.
When he arrived for breakfast everyone was there, he took his usual spot next to Lily. She had probably asked him the least amount of questions overall, something he was very grateful for.
“Where’d you go last night?” James asked through a mouthful of porridge.
“Nightmare. Went for a walk”
“You were gone for a while though” Sirius cut in.
Remus looked at him, raised an eyebrow, and went back to his food.
“Sorry” Sirius muttered, a word that he had said many times to Remus.
“Remus, if you ever want to talk about anything, you know we’re here for you right?” James pleaded.
Remus didn’t know what was worse, the pitying looks from James and Peter, or the way that Sirius was looking down at his plate, avoiding any kind of interaction. Remus couldn’t take it anymore, so he just got up and left, leaving his food that tastes flavourless to him anyway.
It is very hard for him to distance himself from his friends, when they are so desperate to be part of his life. He thought about skipping his lessons, but that would likely lead to more interrogations from his friends, so he decided to just push himself through the day, and hope he would be left alone.
After a day of mindlessly waiting through classes, Remus layed in bed, facing a similar situation as the day before. Deciding to not even try sleeping, Remus got up and went for his ‘walk’.
He wouldn’t admit it out loud, but part of him was hoping that Regulus would be there, the night before had been strange, yet oddly comforting.
He wasn’t surprised when he arrived at the clearing and saw the younger Black brother, and Regulus wasn’t surprised when Remus sat down next to him, this time Regulus was reading a book, Remus strained to see what it was.
“It’s Jane Eyre,” Regulus said, rolling his eyes.
“Your family lets you read muggle books?”
“Obviously not,” Regulus says back, with a snort.
“So what brings you down here tonight?” Regulus asks, putting down his book.
“Can’t sleep, you?”
“Same here”
They each looked at each other, eyes full of understanding.
“Tell me about Jane Eyre then,”
Regulus looked at Remus like he had been waiting for that his whole life, and quickly dove into a ramble about Jane and Mr Rochester.
They returned to their dorms the same time as the day before, and each of them got yet another restful few hours of sleep.