Chapter 1
Chapter 1:
The funny thing about pain is that it’s all relative. Some people find being tickled painful, others do not. Something as simple as a paper cut can cause pain. A small cut created by an inanimate object can cause a burning type of pain that’s hard to ignore but is hardly noticeable on the outer skin. The type of pain Hermione was feeling was otherworldly, nothing simple about it. Her body was on fire like a million paper cuts all over her skin. A scream ripped through her, and that’s what brought her back to consciousness. Hermione’s eyes shot open, gasping for air. The after effects of the torture set upon her by that madwoman Bellatrix Lestrange.
Hermione leapt to her feet, quickly surveying her surroundings. She wasn’t in the Manor anymore that much was obvious. Tall trees swept as far as her eyes could see. The sun was setting, so she’d been out for hours now. How did she get out here? Why was she here? Was this some new sort of torture? She began walking in what she hoped would be her way out, holding on to the trees to keep her steady, the aftershocks of the cruciatus curse nearly knocking her over. But she was determined to get out, to get back to Harry and Ron. She froze when she heard a disturbance nearby, snap. Her trembling hand instinctually went for her wand, but it was no use. It wasn’t there.
Her breath caught and a chill ran up her spine when she heard that deranged woman’s cackle. Of course it was a game, Bellatrix was toying with her until she ultimately decided to finish her off. Hermione pressed her body against a tree hoping it provided enough coverage to hide her from the crazed witch, even though Hermione knew it was no use, Bellatrix knew exactly where she was.
“Come out, come out wherever you are Mudblood. I’ve got a surprise for you.” Bealltrix said in a singsong voice. She was taunting her and Hermione knew it would only be worse if she didn’t come out from her hiding spot. Hermione braced herself and came out from behind the tree, ready to face whatever she had planned. What she didn’t expect was for Bellatrix to not be alone.
“Professor?” Hermione was shocked to see him, the last time they spoke was at Bill and Fleur’s wedding. Bellatrix had him in a body bind and was levitating him behind her. He looked shocked to see her, he was trying to scream but nothing was coming out.
Bellatrix cackled again, “Now now, here’s the rules: if you can survive the night, I’ll let you go.” Her eyes held a wicked gleam, like she knew Hermione wasn’t going to last. And with that she apparated away and released the professor from his binds.
Hermione rushed to him as he hit the ground, “Professor, you must get up, we’ve got to go, I don’t know when she’ll come back. Come—“
“Hermione—“
“Professor, Pl—“
“Hermione!” He yelled, grabbing her forcefully by the shoulder shaking her slightly.
“You need to run. Now!” He forced her up, yanking on her arm.
“Professor, we both need to run, she’ll find us if we stay here.” Hermione was frantic; she never wanted to be near that woman again.
“Hermione, listen to me! It’s the full moon. You. Need. To. Run.” He was looking at her now, his eyes were flickering between their normal hazel color to fiery amber. She gasped. Of course this was Bellatrix’s plan, to let her be mauled by a werewolf.
“Go!” He yelled, but it came out more of a snarl. That was all Hermione needed to go into survival mode, she began to run, running faster than she ever had before. The aches from the cruciatus curse still wore on her body. The thrumming pain reeked havoc on her. She barely missed a stump, tripping when she heard the first agonizing howl.
She got herself back on her feet. Hermione paused, realizing she needed to try and outsmart the wolf. She pulled her jumper over her head, throwing it to her left, and running in the opposite direction. She knew it wouldn’t divert his attention for long but it’ll stall him for a moment or two. Hermione just needed to figure out where she was and how to get out of here alive.
She kept running, going in different directions and back to try and confuse the wolf with her scent all over the place. The burning in her lungs reminding her she was alive. It had been hours at this point, she just needed to keep going, maybe she’d make it out. She couldn’t see much but she wasn’t going to stop.
The pounding of her feet against the hard ground kept her going. Unfortunately she didn’t see the hole in the ground before it was too late, her foot got caught, snapping her ankle. She fell to the ground in agony. She tried muffling her scream as best she could, biting down on her lip hard enough she was sure it was bleeding now.
Pulling at her leg with shaky hands, her breath hitched when she heard a growl coming from behind her. She caught sight of him, his eyes glowing in the dark, just teeth bigger than anything she’s ever seen before and saliva dripping from his mouth, it was hungry and it was locked in on her. She scrambled up and started trying to get away, her foot in agonizing pain as she dragged her body. That’s when she felt the slashes at her back.
She cried out, pulling away, grasping at the ground trying to find something to fight with. A cold rock made its way into her hand and she slammed it against the werewolf’s head. That disorentied him enough for her to get away, but she didn’t get very far before he was back on her slashing at her face, her stomach, any skin available. She thrashed around, fighting him off as best she could, pushing at his snout but that only made him more angry. He leapt down, biting down on her shoulder ripping at the skin.
Hermione screamed, kicking and punching. Tears welled in her eyes, she knew she was about to die.
That’s when the werewolf backed away, clawing at itself, yelping in pain. It collapsed on the floor and all that was left was an unconscious man.
To her right, the sun began to peak through the trees, the night was over. The light pink sky was a beautiful sight, what a beautiful way to die, she thought to herself. She let out a shuddering breath.
The noise alerted the man, and he pulled himself up searching for the noise. “Hermione! No!” He scrambled to get to her, pulling her close hoping to stop the blood loss.
“Remus,” and that’s when her eyes rolled back in her head, her last thought was of Bellatrix and putting all her magic into escaping her clutches. Then it was black.
——————————————————————
Remus didn’t know how it happened, but somehow she managed to disapparate them away from the Manor and they landed directly into Grimmauld Place, In the kitchen. the wards going haywire. Next thing he knew a wand was pointed at his head.
“The year I escaped Azkaban during the confrontation in the shrieking shack, what did I say to you?”
“Well, you’d know all about the madness within, wouldn’t you, Remus?” Remus turned to look at his friend.
Sirius lowered his wand, taking in the situation that turned up at his door. He noticed the girl in his friend's arms.
“Moony what happened? We need to get her to Hogwarts.” Sirius didn’t give him any time to respond, pulling him, still holding Hermione, towards the floo.
They made it through the floo into the Headmasters Office, Minerva was sitting at her desk, shocked to see them.
“Oh my, what’s happened!” Minerva jumped up, knocking over her teacup.
“No time, we need to get to the hospital wing. Now!“ rushing down the stairs of the office, getting to the hospital wing in record time.
“Pomfrey we need you,” Sirius called out to the woman who was most likely still sleeping. She rushed out of her room, still half asleep.
Remus laid Hermione down on the bed, looking over the damage, at what he’d done to her. It was only then that he realized he was still unclothed. Sirius, who was wearing a dressing robe over his nightwear, quickly handed it over so he could cover himself.
Pomfrey began running diagnostics, cleaning and closing the wounds. But Remus knew they would never heal.
“Remus, what happened?” Minerva questioned.
Remus couldn’t take his eyes off the girl, the young girl whose life he just ruined, he broke from his trance when Sirius put his hand on his shoulder, “Moony?”
Remus stood straighter ready for the judgement that would come once he explained. “I was captured by Greyback a couple days ago on a mission. I’d been in the cells when Harry and Ron were brought down stairs. They’d been captured. We could hear her screams from upstairs, I don’t know what they did to her, but when they stopped we all got worried. That was yesterday morning.” He cast his eyes downward, ashamed at what happened. He was a monster.
“Bellatrix led me outside, I assumed I was going to be alone and that they didn’t want to risk me inside during the full moon. But she had something else in mind. Hermione was already in the woods when we got there.” Tears were threatening to spill, but he fought them back.
Sirius, putting his hand on his shoulder for comfort. “What happened then, Moony?”
“She said she wanted to play a game, if Hermione could survive the night, she’d let her go. God! Hermione didn’t even know it was the full moon. Bellatrix left then. Hermione—“
Remus was watching her again, “she didn’t know I was what she needed to be running from, she thought Bellatrix would be back. I yelled at her to run, she fought me at first, thinking I wanted her to leave me behind. Once I got her to realize what was happening she was gone. I don’t remember anything else. Next thing I know I wake up, I find Hermione barely breathing, and somehow we apparate out of there and straight into Grimmauld, I don’t know how we bypassed the wards.” He furrowed his brow, how did they manage to get past the anti-apparition wards at Malfoy Manor and Grimmauld Place?
“Moony, don’t blame yourself, you didn’t want this. You didn’t mean to—“
“She is a werewolf now because of me! I’m a monster, she’ll never be the same!” He was furious, how could they not blame him? He did this to her, she almost died, but now she has a fate worse than death because of him.
Just then Hermione gasped, jolting up, eyes wild. “Where’s Remus? Is he alright?” She was looking at Madam Pomfrey not realizing there were others in the room.
Remus was shocked, how could she care about him after what he did?
“He’s right here, Miss Granger.” Minerva gestured to him, bringing her attention to him.
“How’d we get out? How’d we get to Hogwarts?” Hermione was confused, everything hurt but she couldn’t think about that right now. She began to get up. “Is— is this another trick?” She tried standing but fell back onto the floor when she tried to put weight on her broken ankle.
They rushed to her side trying to help her back into bed, but she wasn’t having any of that. She held out her hands to stop the oncoming attack, “Ple—please I didn’t steal it from your vault. I didn’t. I swear. Y—you said you’d let us go. I made it out. Please— “ she was having a panic attack, she couldn’t get enough air into her constricting lungs. The walls were closing in on her.
She pulled herself into the corner, trying to protect her backside, while she watched the four people in front of her, waiting for them to strike.
Remus was walking up to her now, she pulled herself further into the corner as far as she could. “Hermione, it's not a trick, we made it out, you somehow apparated us out of there.” He cautiously kneeled down beside her. She was frightened of everything that moved. Her eyes darted all around the room.
She watched him carefully. “Prove it,” she hiccuped. She pulled her knees to her chest and her hands wrapped around them, she was angling herself away from him, but she watched him as he sat back beside her.
“Minerva, please prove to Hermione that we are who we say we are and we are at Hogwarts.” Remus turned to Mcgonagall who nodded, and approached Hermione carefully sitting on the bed near her.
“My dear child, in your second year, during all that business with the Chamber of Secrets. I seem to remember a twelve year old girl being admitted for a polyjuice mishap. She wouldn’t speak to anyone but myself on the matter.” Hermione’s eyes widened, realization hit her. She made it out.
“Professor Mcgonagall? It’s really you.” She smiled then, she missed her favorite professor.
“I can keep going, Miss Granger, if it’ll help?” Mcgonagall knew Hermione wouldn’t want the rest of the story repeated and hoped it would distract her enough to pull her out of her panic.
“No. No, that's quite alright.” Hermione went to stand forgetting about her ankle once again. This time Remus caught her. They made eye contact and that sparked Hermione’s memory of what had happened the night before. She pulled back from him like he was on fire, she regretted her reaction immediately, she could see that it had made Remus upset. He quickly helped her settle back onto the bed.
He went to step away from her, she could tell he was fighting his inner turmoil so she snatched his hand before he had a chance to get too far away.
“Can I have a moment with Remus please?” She looked at the three other occupants in the room, they quickly nodded and left.
She turned to the man still staring at their hands, the storm of emotions obvious on his face. She moved her legs over so he could sit on the bed with her.
“Can you sit please?” She watched him contemplate the request, eyes darting from the bed to the door. Almost as if he was debating running away. He eventually sat down, letting go of Hermione’s hand. She pulled her hands into her lap, missing the warmth his hand provided.
“Hermione—“
“Am I going to turn the next full moon?” she didn’t want to be so blunt but the question was eating away at her. She could feel his eyes on her as she twiddled with her thumbs trying not to look at him.
He let out a shaky breath, “Yes.”
That was all he said, no reason to sugarcoat the truth. She tried holding back the tears, but sobs racked her body. She put her head to her knees, hoping to hide away. She didn’t want him to see her like this. Broken.
She felt arms wrap around her, the warmth cascading over her again. He held her as she cried. Letting all of the pent up emotion out. Her head was against his chest and she could smell him. He smelt like pine, cinnamon, and a hint of parchment. She mumbled into his chest, “I don’t blame you, Remus Lupin.”
He pulled away from her, shocked to hear those words come out of her mouth.
“Hermione, how could you not blame me? I did this to you. I’m a monster.” He was appalled that she didn’t blame him.
“How can I blame you? You can’t control the transition! Did you hunt me down on purpose? Did you put me in the middle of the damn forest with no wand? No! You didn’t. I couldn’t blame you even if I tried.” She was vibrating with anger now. Why was the world so cruel? How could this have happened to her? To Remus?
She grasped his hand again, “Remus, you are as much a victim as I am. Bellatrix Lestrange is the one to blame. Not you.” He wasn’t looking at her, but she could see the tears dropping onto his lap.
He sighed, looking over at her, “Hermione I’m sorry. I’m sorry that you were there. I’m sorry that you are now scarred for life. I’m sorry that it was by my hand, I’m so, so sorry.”
Hermione nodded, she knew he needed to get that off his chest. She knew from Harry how much Remus loathed himself. How much of a monster he thought he was. Now he had attacked her. Infected her.
“D—do you remember anything from last night?” Hermione wanted to know if he remembered the attack. Or if she’d be the only one with those dreaded memories.
“I don’t remember what happened.”
She nodded. She wasn’t sure if she was relieved or not.
“But I normally regain my memories within a few days if it’s a full moon without my potions.” She froze. She wasn’t sure if she wanted him to remember. It was terrible enough, she didn’t want him to feel even worse than he did now.
“If— when the memories come back, please don’t hate yourself too much. I won’t lie, I—it was bad. But I know it wasn’t you.”
Remus slowly nodded his head, he was not ready for these memories to make themselves known. He didn’t know if he could handle it.
Hermione was mulling over what had happened the last couple of days, so much had happened. They were captured. ‘Oh god Harry and Ron’ she thought. Were they still in the Manor?
“Remus! Harry and Ron? Th—they were still in the Manor. We need to get them out.” She was again rushing about trying to stand. Remus grabbed her and pushed her back on the bed.
“Hermione! You can’t walk, stop trying to get up! You will be no use to them if you hurt yourself further.” He was stern, trying to get her to see reason. Hermione laid back on the pillow, groaning in frustration.
“If I had my wand I’d have this fixed! And we’d be there already.“ she threw her hands up in anger.
“Pomfrey did all she could to help the healing, it’ll take a couple days before your ankle is good to go.” He looked down at her foot that was poking out of the blanket; it was bruised and slightly swollen.
“Nonsense.” She waved him off “I developed a spell on the run, it mends bones in an instant, you’d be surprised how many times we needed that. I know the other things won’t heal, but if I could borrow a wand, I could at least walk.”
He was surprised that Hermione had created such a complex spell while on the run, well really he shouldn’t have been too surprised it is Hermione after all.
“Let me call Pomfrey back in, maybe she will let you use her wand.” he paused. “That’s an excellent achievement, Hermione.” He went to bring the others back into the room. Hermione smiled to herself from the praise she received.
Remus returned shortly with all three of the people waiting patiently outside the hospital wing.
Pomfrey was excited to hear about Hermione’s work. “I hear you’ve developed a healing spell, dear girl.”
Hermione blushed. “Yes, it’s not perfect, but it gets the job done. If you wouldn’t mind Madam Pomfrey, I’d like to borrow your wand. I can show you the spell too if you like?” Hermione held her hand out, Pomfrey eagerly placed her wand in her hand. Excited to learn the new spell.
The wand felt odd in her hand, she’d never used anyone else’s wand before. She could tell it didn’t mesh with her magic very well, but it should get the job done. Hermione performed the spell exactly as designed over her ankle. After a moment she felt her ankle snap back into place and the swelling went away. The bruising itself would take a little longer to disappear but she should be able to walk on it now.
Hermione wiggled her toes, rolling her foot a few times, it seemed to be healed. Now for the final test. Standing. She looked at Remus, who was standing beside her, ”I’m going to stand now, if you wouldn’t mind?” She held her hand out to him. He grasped her hand and she used it to brace herself as she stood slowly off the bed. She applied pressure to her foot, all seemed to be in working order.
“Now that’s settled. I need to get to Harry and Ron. Immediately.” She began rummaging through some clothes that were left at her bedside. Remus was frantic; he didn't want her to leave, she needed to recover. He looked at the others in the room to see if they would help try to stop her but they seemed just as shocked as he was, that she was in such a rush.
“Hermione, it's too soon for you to be up and about. You lost a lot of bl—“ Remus was cut off by the hospital wing doors slamming open.
The two boys she was in such desperate need to get to came rushing in.
“Harry! Ron!” She pushed away from Remus, running to them pulling them into a bone crushing hug.
“Mione! you're okay!”
“We thought the worst when we couldn’t find you when we escaped the manor,” Harry pulled back from the hug, taking in Hermione’s appearance. Ron was equally as shocked seeing the angry red slashes and bite marks all over her.
“What the hell happened?!” They shouted in unison.
Hermione looked panicked. How was she going to explain what had happened?