Imperio

Sex was yucky, Draco thought to himself as Harry’s head bobbed up and down on his cock. He wanted to like it—he really did—but, he just didn't.

Draco loved Harry and loved. Their relationship was built on years of trust and care.

He loved how casually Harry touched him. Harry was so different then the staid upper class girls he'd been expected to court. Harry thought nothing of sliding his hand into Draco's as they walked through Hogsmeade or pulling Draco's feet into his lap as they watched muggle TV on the couch. More than anything, Draco loved the hot passion of Harry's hands when he spanked him. 

But as soon as sex was on the table something shifted in Draco. Touches were no longer an expression of love but an unwanted demand.

He tried to hide it. He loved Harry and sex was important in a relationship. He would tolerate this for him. After all, what kind of sub hated sex with his own boyfriend? 

Harry was a generous lover and therein lay the problem because Draco never wanted to take his turn. He loved getting Harry off. Loved seeing him come apart on his tongue.

Draco just didn’t want anything in return, something Harry could never understand. 

Maybe if he’d been a Dom it would have been different but Draco was the sub. He loved pain and control and being a good boy. He wore his collar with pride. 

Why couldn’t he be a good boy for Harry like this too?

Of course, Harry noticed. He wasn’t an idiot. Instead of leaning into his caresses, Draco held himself stiffly, trying not to flinch away. He tried to get Harry off quickly, hoping he would fall asleep before it was Draco’s “turn”. 

“Draco, we need to talk”

Draco wondered for a moment if he could pretend to be asleep and avoid the painful conversation but quickly gave it up. Harry knew him too well.

“How can I make this good for you?” Harry asked, not an ounce of accusation in his voice.

“You don’t need to, Harry.”

“But I want to” Harry insisted with a smile. “You deserve to feel good too”

“But I don’t!” Draco blurted out before he could stop himself. “I wish it felt good to me but it doesn’t” 

“Bottoming feels… overwhelming, but not in a good way”

he rushed the words in a tumble before he lost his nerve.

“I feel too vulnerable and powerless and overstimulated. Every touch hurts because skin is too sweaty and hair is too rough and lights are too bright, smells too loud and I can’t stand to look into your eyes and I just want to crawl out of my skin” 

He quieted, expecting recriminations or arguments. He expected Harry to question how pleasure could be torture and a caning heaven?

He dreaded the question because he didn’t have an answer. 

Instead, Harry simply asked again: “How can I make it better?”

Draco racked his brains. He hadn’t even thought about this. No one had asked him the question before. 

He wanted to say that he didn’t want Harry to touch him but that wasn’t quite right. He did want pleasure but it seemed unachievable.

Still, an answer came to mind unbidden.

“I want to try being in control”

Any other Dom would have scoffed at him but Harry simply nodded. 

“Ok”

Emboldened Draco pushed on

“I want to use the Imperius curse on you”

Harry looked a little taken aback. They’d used low power Crucio’s in bed before, but torture was a far cry from removing someone’s free will. Still, Harry did not run away screaming. 

“I trust you”

Draco tried to justify himself. 

“I know you can break it. So if you really needed to stop, you could”

Harry shook his head. 

“That was the Horcrux. Now it’s gone… Well, I doubt I can break out of mind magic anymore” 

Draco was floored. He knew Harry trusted him but how could anyone trust him like this?

Harry tied Draco up and smacked him around but his will was his own. He always had safewords and his wand. If they did this, stopping Draco would be impossible. 

“Are you sure? There will be no way for you to stop me if it’s too much”

Harry nodded.

“We’ll have to negotiate, but I trust you to keep me safe”

The responsibility was too much. Draco wanted to back out now. He didn’t want to risk hurting Harry, even by accident. 

But he wanted this.

Draco knew Harry better than he knew himself. He could make this work. 

“Ok, let’s negotiate”

“You know my hard limits,” said Harry. Draco nodded. He did.

“But tell me anyway” Draco didn’t want to risk any misunderstandings. 

“No permanent damage, no public involvement, no humiliation”

“Are there any other limits for this? I don’t care how small”

Harry was quiet for a moment, as if thinking through his response. 

“No limits during the scene itself, I don’t think, but…”

“I’m your Dom. I've never switched before. I’m worried how being out of control will make me feel but more than that, I’m worried you won’t respect me as your Dom after this”

“Harry, I have more respect for you than you can ever understand” It was true. “This just makes me respect you more. I don’t think I could ever even think about giving anyone this kind of power.”

Harry looked a little embarrassed.

“I have an idea…. What if you order me to take control?”

Harry nodded.

“That would work.”

Draco was relieved. He didn’t want to bottom but he didn't really want to be a Dom either.

Harry continued: “As for activities, you can fuck me, suck me, make me fuck you, whatever you want really. Anything we’ve done and liked before is on the table”

Anything Harry liked, Draco thought to himself. He hadn’t much liked any of those things. He pushed the thoughts aside. Not. The. Time. 

“Anything else we should talk about? Or should we get on with it?” Harry asked

“You want to do this now?” Draco was taken aback. He’d imagined some future date that would never come. 

“Why wait?”

“Draco wracked his brains but could find no excuse so he silently summoned his wand”

“Draco, I order you to curse me”

“Imperio”