Chapter 5
‘He just – it can’t – I mean… Argh!’ Sirius growled in frustration. ‘I don’t even know what I’m trying to say!’ He took a deep breath, trying to calm himself. ‘I don’t want him to be like this.’
‘He can’t exactly help it!’ snapped Lucius. ‘It’s not like he can just turn it off!’
‘That’s not what I meant!’ Sirius snapped in reply, before trying to breathe again. ‘I mean, I don’t want him to stay like this. I want to help, I want him to – to… I don’t know, be better.’
Lucius face twisted in anger, but Narcissa held up a hand to stop him. ‘I think what Sirius is trying to say, is that he does not want Harry to continue living a life of fear, and he would like for Harry to feel more safe and secure, to come out of his shell.’
‘Yes! That’s what I’m trying to say!’ Sirius cried. ‘Merlin’s balls, I’m not brain damaged enough to think he’s going to just stop behaving like an abused child because I don’t want him to!’
Lucius narrowed his eyes at Sirius before relenting. ‘He does need help to come out of his shell, I agree. But we have been making progress since he has been here. You’ve all seen it – he accepts hugs more easily, doesn’t shy away every time someone is near him. He hasn’t asked me about scrubbing anything in almost a week now!’
‘He is less afraid, but he’s still… he’s still hiding. He’s accepting things, but he isn’t asking for things. He might not think everyone is going to hit him, but I bet he still thinks you’ll get sick of him at some point and kick him back to those worthless beastly muggles. Or that if he asks for something you don’t want to give, that you’ll suddenly decide he has to work for it, has to earn it somehow.’ Sirius ran a hand through his hair in frustration.
‘I believe he is right.’ Severus said slowly, ignoring the looks of surprise he received. He may have forgiven Sirius for his teenaged misdeeds, but they were certainly not friends. ‘Harry has likely accepted a more favourable situation than his previous one, but he likely is still operating under a slew of incorrect assumptions about how the world works.’
Sirius nodded. ‘I bet he thinks he has to be perfect, or you’ll change your minds about him.’
Lucius bristled. ‘We would not! And we have made that clear to him! we have been helping him every night with his reading, going through his summer homework together – all sorts of things!’
‘Reading? What’s wrong with his reading?’ Sirius asked.
‘Nobody ever took the time to help him develop his reading skills – he is able to read, but rather poorly for his age. We have been reading with him every night before bed, and he is improving considerably.’ Narcissa replied.
Sirius and Severus shared a look. ‘He probably thinks you’re just helping him so he doesn’t embarrass you. Everyone knows you have custody of him now, he’ll think you’re just trying to stop him dragging down the Malfoy name.’
Lucius and Narcissa both gasped, horrified. ‘No, he – no!’ Lucius denied adamantly.
‘Unfortunately, yes. Don’t be disheartened, Luc,’ Severus said quietly. ‘It is not a reflection of you, or your care. The boy has lived for years under the roof of people who have convinced him he is utterly worthless, or that any worth he does have is directly related to his ability to serve in some way. Like you told me a while ago – it might take just as long hearing something different, for him to actually hear it.’
Lucius frowned heavily, eyes flicking back and forth as he considered. ‘So – so we continue as we have been? Just supporting and encouraging him as best we can, and affirming at every opportunity that he is important and valuable and worthy of our love and attention?’
‘Yes.’
‘I think we should play a prank.’
Severus whipped around to glare at Sirius. ‘Of course you do, you immature fool,’ he snarled. ‘All those years in Azkaban still not enough to make you grow up?!’
Narcissa gave a sharp clap. ‘Enough. We will not devolve into petty squabbles. This conversation is about how to help Harry. Severus, keep your comments civil. Sirius, take things seriously – no jokes, please. Harry’s life is not a game.’
‘Of course it’s not a bloody game! And I know I was an idiot as a kid, I know those pranks were too far. Not like you didn’t give as good as you got, though.’ He directed at Severus with a glower. ‘But I was serious about the prank. Harry needs to do something wrong and see that you won’t turn on him. He needs to see what the consequences are for misbehaving, so he doesn’t automatically assume you’ll crucio him or something excessive. Tell Draco to do something naughty and catch them out, so Harry can see what realistic consequences look like.’
Surprised silence reigned for a long minute, before Severus gave a slow nod. ‘I can’t believe I’m agreeing with Sirius Black about a prank, but he’s right.’
Sirius gave him a sly grin. ‘Maybe I can dig out that one that-‘
‘No. Whatever you’re going to say, no. This will be a harmless, silly prank. Something funny, something that inspires laughter – for everyone, not just the perpetrators.’ Narcissa said sternly.
‘Yes, Cissy.’ Sirius said meekly.