September
Chapter 7
Michiru was used to waking up early to go to school. During summer vacation she had kept her alarm clock set at the usual time, so she could have breakfast with her parents and ride the train to Takarazuka.
To be truly honest to herself, she was dying to go back to school. Not just because she loved what she did there, but she missed being in a place where she could prove herself on a daily basis. Her father was still being his usual self, ignoring her, and her mother was going back and forward to Tokyo for some performances as guest violinist in the philharmonic.
She never understood why they were still together, being so different. Daiki was a stubborn traditionalist with a tiny mind and Natsuki was this independent free spirit. Michiru couldn't believe her parents being married was just love. She didn't believe love was an unstoppable force, capable of keeping these two people together.
She didn't believe in love at all. Not when she was cursed to be who she was. Being raised in a family like hers, Michiru was the perfect example of a good girl, intelligent, elegant, polite and respectful. She was the face of the next generation of Kaiou. She would marry a man her father approved, another classic musician, probably one of Daiki's students at the university.
Then she would have a couple of children and raise them the same way she was raised.
But Michiru had changed the game. She wasn't her father's perfect little girl. She would write her own future.
Even if that meant being away from the only man she knew she would have in her life. Her father was her whole world when Michiru was growing up. And now, he barely looked at her.
Sighing, the aquamarine haired girl thought if all of her sacrifices were worthy. Her mother supported her decisions, but she wasn't around to guide her in this independent path she was building for herself. Her aunt Saeko was great, but she didn't really understand Michiru's choices.
She had Ami, but her cousin was already too busy trying to figure a way to deal with her own choices.
At least, at school, Michiru could let a huge part of her true self run free. Only if her father could see her, in her natural habitat. Only then Daiki would realize how happy she was.
But, even with all that was happening with her life, Michiru didn't feel lonely, or truly alone. Because in that school Michiru had found her place, her family. And she knew she had their full support
Of course, she would need to hide herself, at least a tiny part of who she was. But that was a small price to pay for her freedom. And her freedom tasted so damn good... She wouldn't ever do anything to jeopardize that.
Michiru couldn't afford losing everything she had worked so hard to achieve. Not when the consolation prize was going back to that cold house, with her future already decided for her. She would thrive. And she would succeed.
******
The first week back to school was normal; at least what was considered normal for that kind of place. All the girls were giving their best in every class, and the teachers were used to this. Every year, around September, the first years found their own pace and got used to their demanding routine.
And the month away, for summer vacation, was never a problem. September was a month of truth. Because now was the perfect time to find talents and real hard working girls. The Revue was really demanding, in every aspect. The future actresses needed to understand that, right at the beginning of their path. The Revue was their life, since their first day there.
So they had to stay sharp, taking care of themselves, training and practicing. They were future Siennes, the future of the Revue rested on their shoulders. And, of course, they represented the school, so they had to behave and never forget the school rules. Even outside school grounds.
That's why they had summer homework and a second test week was scheduled. But neither Michiru nor Haruka were worried about it.
During her time in Hakui, in her grandma's place, she kept her schedule just the same as hers in school. Waking up at the same time as she did at the dorms and going for a run at the beach. It felt a little weird for her to be running again, she couldn't do it back in school, due to the lack of time, but now in a place that she loved so much?
Haruka always respected her body and its limits. She knew she was just an injury away from throwing her dreams in the trash. And running was a perfect way for her to deal with any kind of stress. When she was running, she had no worries, no problems.
She became one with the wind.
During the two weeks she spent at her grandma's, Haruka did everything by the book. She had her study time, dance practice time, singing time and of course, best friend and grandma time. Neither Mamoru nor Ayako would forgive her if she forgot about them.
And Ayako did her best to take her granddaughter's mind off her work every now and then. After all, she deserved some rest.
Back in school, Haruka felt ready for anything. Nothing could stop her now. She had the second best grades in her class. If she wanted to be number one someday, the girl knew she had to apply herself, even more. And Haruka had this feeling her second year would be easier. She would be able to cut her hair and start her training to be an otokoyaku, since her stage gender would be assigned to her at the end of her first year.
And Haruka knew for sure she would become an otokoyaku. Tall, slender and with a naturally deep voice, it just seemed impossible for her not become a 'male' on stage.
Just like she knew Michiru would be a musumeyaku. Delicate like a flower, her years practicing Japanese traditional dance had helped building an elegant figure. And Haruka saw Michiru as a beautiful girl, with her aquamarine hair always carefully braided and her deep blue eyes so confident.
Michiru always had this sad look on her face, she was always so demanding with herself, always so angry with the tiniest mistake she made. And Haruka had this need to show Michiru she wasn't a talentless glob like she used to believe she was.
If Michiru saw herself the same way Haruka did, she would never second guess herself in her life.
******
Ballet was Haruka's favorite class. She couldn't remember a time when her life wasn't mixed with ballet. Since she was a child, so young, so eager to learn, she loved her lessons.
And how she felt about ballet reflected in her dancing. Being one of the most experienced dancers in the first years, Haruka shone in her black leotard.
And Michiru couldn't take her eyes off her. Mesmerized by the way her body moved; watching Haruka dance was the only thing Michiru allowed herself to do. Watching her wasn't about her crush. It was about admiring a talent.
Admiring her freedom. The same freedom Michiru was fighting so hard for. And fighting even harder to enjoy it.
"She's beautiful, isn’t she?" Someone asked Michiru. She took a few minutes to get out of the trance Haruka’s moves had put her on, to recognize the owner of the voice. Takako was one of the few friends Michiru had at school, thanks to the fundraising. And they had bonded over the first test week back in July.
"Tenou-san is truly the best dancer our class has," the girl said, her arms crossed in front of her body, without taking her eyes of the blonde girl, who was currently presenting a ballet routine their teacher asked.
Michiru smirked. To the rest of their class, Haruka was Tenou-san. No one called her by her first name. And since they were still thinking about nicknames and stage names, Haruka was still just her prince. Her knight in shining armor. Or in a simple black leotard…
To Michiru, Haruka was more than just Tenou-san. She was confident, admirable, focused and so damn talented. The true spirit of the Revue. To Michiru, Haruka was more than just a classmate.
Haruka could be a close friend, if Michiru allowed herself to open her heart and let the other girl in. If a month away didn't kill her crush, maybe becoming her friend, her sister, would do the job.
But trying to kill a crush was so ridiculously hard when Haruka was just too perfect to be true.
Haruka was indeed one of the best dancers the first year had. She had perfect control of her movements, and she could easily and so quickly learn any choreography. That's why she was the one who taught ballet in her study group. Under her tutelage, Michiru saw her own skills getting so much better. Mayuko was a great teacher, after all, her crash course had helped her get into this school. But Haruka had a passion that was impossible to describe. Maybe Michiru would find hers soon.
At least, she was hoping that.
******
"So, are we going to the music room after class?" Kaoru, another member of their clique asked, looking up at Haruka, their informal leader. "Our modern dance test is already on Monday," she voiced her concern.
"Yes, of course. I already reserved the smaller one, next to the stairs for us," Haruka explained while they waited for Michiru and Takao. Some honkasei girls had asked to talk to them privately. And since no one could talk to a honkasei unless they talked first, Haruka and Kaoru were just waiting.
"I know this is silly, but are you nervous about the test week?" Kaoru asked, her voice low as usual. They were used to whispering by now.
"Not really." The blonde girl was checking the notice board, seeing flyers for upcoming shows at the theaters and rehearsal timetables. She made a mental note to find sometime after the tests to invite Michiru to see a play at the Bow Hall, a small theater adjacent to the Grand Theater, normally used for more experimental plays. Since they got back to school, she could feel her friend quieter. They weren't close like her and Mamoru, but Haruka wanted to know her better. Not just as a classmate.
Maybe it was her otokoyaku persona, already showing itself. Or just her inner curiosity. Michiru was always too reserved, too polite, too quiet… Haruka knew they had a good chance of ending in different Troupes after finishing school, so it seemed a good idea to make some good friends now.
******
Michiru and Takao walked quietly, next to the wall, looking at the floor, like they were supposed to do as first years. The school day was over for most of the students, but they had decided to start studying for their tests, a couple of weeks away, in the beginning of October.
Haruka had decided to start this really early so they could see if summer vacation had affected them. The blonde girl wasn't worried; she had followed her schedule, staying sharp as ever. She was a little worried about Michiru, though. Knowing a little about her issues, Haruka feared for her friend. She was almost certain that, if Michiru thought she was worse than before, she would push herself even harder and risk an injury.
And Haruka couldn't let that happen. They were wearing their white/silver tracksuit, the same one they used for pilates and gym. It was the only outfit they had which had the school logo embroiled above their heart. Haruka loved her great uniform, but being able to carry the school name in her chest made her even prouder to be there.
Like they did before, each one of the students would be responsible for a test, taking advantage of their expertise. Since they were already warmed up from their ballet class, Haruka opted for a light exercise, not wanting to overdo it.
Michiru liked ballet. She wasn't great, but her years as a Japanese dancer helped her with the grace needed for such a delicate style. She was working in an exercise Haruka had showed them, but she couldn't keep her balance after a spin. She almost fell twice before Haruka went to her rescue.
With her hands on Michiru's waist, Haruka helped her spin, working on her balance.
"You need to work with gravity. Don't fight her," Haruka said, a low whisper just for her.
Haruka's singing was her weakest skill, but Michiru really liked her voice. Even being just a teenager, she could tell how Haruka would sound in the future. A husky tone, not quite able to low notes. Her singing voice wasn´t bad and Haruka was slowly improving. Michiru knew that girl had a bright future ahead off her, because she was so hard working… Almost made her feel bad for all her issues and doubts. Every time she looked at Haruka, she saw this amazing girl, following her dream, fighting so hard to show to their teachers what she could do. Not what she had learned before coming to school, but what she learned from them. She always was listening closely to their advices, always practicing and training her body and mind.
Even now, Haruka was so focused in showing her how she should do a spin and the only thing Michiru could think of was how warm her hands, those graceful hands, with those long fingers so perfect to play the piano, felt against her waist. How soft and tender was her touch, how she could feel Haruka´s body slightly pressed against hers.
For the first time, in almost 16 years, Michiru felt something that she couldn´t quite name… She was always so in control of her own emotions, of her feelings… But when she was near Haruka, her rational self just ceased to exist.
And she felt lust. Her body was responding to Haruka´s touch, her skin shivering. Even knowing she just couldn´t do that.
Dear lord… what she was supposed to do now?
TBC