Epilogue
Two sets of very small camera crews swarmed Jared and Jensen’s house and Jared was horribly anxious. Their house was cleaner than it had been since he and Jensen built it, Jared thought. He was aware that the camera crews walking their house and spying in on their conversation were rolling and that everything they said now would potentially make the cut for the finished product, so he didn’t quite know what to say to Jensen at the moment.
“You nervous?” Jensen asked him with a smile, taking his hand.
Jared scowled at him. “It’s Oprah Winfrey, Jensen. She hasn’t done a house-interview this extensive since Harris and Burtka’s. How are you not more nervous?”
“Oh, I’m dying a little on the inside,” Jensen confided, and Jared laughed.
“God, you’re a much better actor than me,” Jared told him and Jensen rolled his eyes, shaking his head.
“We both know that’s not true,” Jensen argued.
“You have more awards than me,” Jared relied on his age-old argument, that Jensen debunked every time.
“Jared, only a few of those are accolades for my acting, which is the basis of our argument,” Jensen sighed, but smiled. “You are far more awarded for your acting than I am for mine.”
“Okay, so you’re just better at more things than I am,” Jared relented and Jensen groaned a little. Jensen still felt a little awkward being complimented, even so many years later, and Jared felt the need to shower Jensen with compliments as often as he could still, trying to convince the nearly perfect man of his near perfection.
“I’m not arguing about this again,” Jensen frowned at him. “You’re amazing, so shut up.”
And before Jared could counter, there was a knock on their front door and Jensen met his eyes, allowing a trace of his own anxiety color his eyes for a brief moment. The camera crews coagulated around them as they went to answer the door. When they swung it open, their smiles identically excited and panicked, Oprah Winfrey smiled at them. She had a final additional man-with-camera behind her, documenting her progression to their front door.
“Hello!” Jared greeted first, enveloping the woman in a huge hug. Jensen gave her a far less encompassing hug but an equally fond smile.
“Hello!” Oprah responded, grinning.
“Please come in,” Jensen invited.
“Thank you,” Oprah agreed, walking into their house and a thrill of electricity went up Jared’s spine as he fully grasped Oprah in their home. “You have such a lovely home! It’s been almost ten years since the first film the two of you worked on, Trauma, dominated the Oscars. How far you two have come!”
“Thanks,” Jensen laughed. “This is the cleanest the house has been since we built it. You should come over more often. Jared’s been stress-cleaning for days.”
“Oh, that wasn’t necessary!” Oprah laughed. “I hope you weren’t too stressed. This is supposed to be more relaxing, me coming to you!”
“Oh, no, it was cathartic,” Jared assured her with a grin. “I finally got to power wash our deck, which was just fun.”
“And did you not help with the cleaning, Jensen?” Oprah admonished and Jensen chuckled.
“I hired a cleaning service,” Jensen explained. “Jared was cleaning on top of that.”
“They…they didn’t power wash the deck…” Jared defended with a smile and Oprah laughed again.
“Anyway,” Jensen steered the conversation. “Would you like a tour before we settle down?”
“I would love a tour!” Oprah agreed. “Do I get to see the whole house? It’s pretty big.”
“Hey, we’re at your beck and call, Ms. Winfrey,” Jared laughed. “We will tour as much of it as you like.”
“Oh, Jared, don’t call me Ms. Winfrey!” Oprah laughed. “Please, Oprah! I’m in your home, I should be calling you Mr. Padalecki.”
“No, that won’t be necessary,” Jared laughed. “Should we start with the kitchen? It’s Jensen’s favorite.”
“One of Jensen’s favorite,” Jensen corrected. “I’m a big fan of my study too. And our bedroom.”
“All of which he designed.” Jared laughed.
They entered the huge kitchen, with grand granite countertops and cupboards in solid cherry wood.
“Can I get you anything, Oprah?” Jensen offered.
“A glass of water before we really get started would be wonderful,” Oprah smiled at him, and Jensen obliged. They all took a seat at the island for a moment.
“This is a beautiful kitchen,” Oprah commented. “Jensen, you designed it?”
“Yes,” Jensen confirmed. “I do most of the cooking, so Jared thought I could make it to my specifications.”
“Jared doesn’t cook?” Oprah laughed. “Is that by choice or necessity?”
Jared laughed. “Oh, I can cook, Jensen just likes to more than I do.”
“Yeah,” Jensen agreed. “It’s one of my hobbies. I like testing out new recipes and whatnot.”
“I like cooking too,” Oprah provided. “So, I thought I’d tell you that I was doing a little more research on you guys on the car ride here. Do you want to know what I found out today?”
“Do we?” Jared grimaced.
Oprah chuckled. “It’s good, I promise. So, a recent article in USA Today stated that the number one highest trending hashtag on Twitter was about the two of you!”
“Oh,” Jensen laughed. “Right. I read that article.”
“What hashtag was it?” Jared inquired.
“#padacklesrelationshipgoals,” Oprah provided. “It had over one hundred million mentions in just the first 24-hours of its trending streak that lasted over three weeks. The #padacklesrelationshipgoals is still the record setting hashtag for the most mentions to date. That’s pretty impressive.”
“Yeah, the internet went a little crazy after the whole thing with the triplets,” Jensen laughed again. Oprah grinned at the mention.
“Yes, that was quite extraordinary,” Oprah agreed. “Do you want to go over it quickly for those in our audience that may not know all the details—although, based on your trending hashtag, I think that percentage of the audience is pretty slim.”
“Sure, I love telling the story anyway!” Jared agreed immediately. “We hit the surrogate jackpot, I guess. After we’d been married for about five years, Jensen and I decided we wanted kids. We decided we wanted to use a surrogate and offer up our own sperm so that our kid was genetically one of ours. We weren’t ever going to genetically check to see who’s sperm won the race, mind you.”
Jensen laughed. “I love the way you tell this story. Won the race. Nice.”
“Thanks, babe,” Jared laughed. “Anyway, so we went to the surrogate agency and met with a surrogate mother, and all that. She’s a wonderful woman, by the way. She visits all the time. Well, the doctors mixed up our sperm and inseminated the surrogate. Lone and behold, a couple days later, she found out definitively that she was pregnant—and then later, she found out that we weren’t just going to have one baby, but three. She was pregnant with triplets. It was crazy, because the doctors warned us that there was a sort of low chance of probability the insemination would take in the first place, much less three of our swimmers making it through. Plus, we found out after they were born, that two of the three babies are genetically full siblings while the other was only a half sibling—which means we have three kids that are genetically both of ours. It’s really cool! And a huge medical marvel. The odds of the entire situation were actually lower than winning the lottery, I think. Some statician wanted to write an article about it at one point.”
“That is a crazy story,” Oprah agreed. “It’s like on Friends! When Phoebe had her brother’s kids.”
“Yes, that’s exactly what I said!” Jensen agreed. “Literally, the first thing out of my mouth was a comment on the similarity.”
“Ours is more special though,” Jared defended. “Because in our situation, it was two different sets of sperm from two different people.”
“Yes, Love, I know,” Jensen laughed.
“So, this is kind of an awkward question, but did you ever definitively find out whose is whose?” Oprah asked.
“No, we haven’t done any genetic testing,” Jensen shook his head. “But Shep and Thomas definitely come from Jared.”
Jared laughed. “We don’t know that.”
“We pretty much do,” Jensen laughed. “And JJ is me all the way.”
“Okay, that I can’t argue with,” Jared agreed. “JJ is definitely you.”
“How do you know?” Oprah inquired.
“Well, again we don’t know,” Jensen clarified. “It could just be the whole nurture vs. nature debate, we’ll never be sure unless we do scientific testing, which we aren’t going to do unless the kids themselves want to know. But…I don’t know. Shep and Thomas are both just so very Jared. They’re happy little boys who are rough housing ninety percent of the time. They’re just very Jared. That’s all I can think to describe it. Plus, there is definitely the physical traits that they share. Thomas looks just like pictures of Jared as a kid.”
“And JJ is a lot more…refined,” Jared grinned. “She’s thoughtful. The most thoughtful little four-year-old you’ll ever meet, I swear. And she has Jensen’s eyes.”
“You two are so cute!” Oprah exclaimed. “It’s just touching to hear you talk about them. Your eyes light up! It’s just so clear how much you love them. It’s adorable.”
“Well, we do get kind of stupidly giddy,” Jared agreed. “If we hadn’t agreed way before getting the triplets not to, we would both definitely be those parents that just post all over social media about their kids nonstop.”
“I don’t think anyone would complain if you did so,” Oprah commented with a laugh. “Can I meet them? Where are the triplets?”
“They’re outside playing,” Jensen replied. “Camille, our friends’ daughter, is keeping an eye on them for us. She likes babysitting the triplets because they’re weirdly well-behaved kids. Like, I don’t know why, but they’re very good listeners. She’s only ten, so we don’t let her babysit if an adult’s not around, but even if there is, she usually doesn’t need much help.”
“Camille, is that Felicia Day’s and Genevieve Cortese’s daughter?” Oprah clarified.
“Yeah, they’re really close friends,” Jensen nodded. “Camille is over here all the time, sometimes with her moms, sometimes without. She always comes over here to watch TV. The first time she came over she was like, ‘Uncle Jay’—which, by the way at this point, could be either of us, we both kind of go by Jay every once in a while—‘Uncle Jay, mom got rid of TiVo!’ So we’ll show up sometimes with her just chilling on the couch and like, eating popcorn. It’s really cool, she’s a great kid.”
“Which mom got rid of TiVo?” Oprah laughed.
“That would be Gen,” Jared confided. “Millie was not happy with Gen for a while after that. It was kind of awkward, because the more we let her hang at our place, the more Gen would get angry at us for encouraging it. And we were like, ‘The kid’s using a spare key! We’re not going to change the locks!’ But it’s cool now. She does it with all of us.”
“All of you?” Oprah asked.
“Yeah, I mean, we have a really close-knit friend group,” Jensen explained, “and we sort of created our own little cul-de-sac.”
“Really?” Oprah laughed.
“Yeah,” Jared nodded. “Jensen and I, about a year after we got married, thought it’d be really cool to build our own house, with our specifications and everything. So we bought this huge piece of land—big enough, actually, to pretty much have a large farm on—and built a house. Then Felicia and Gen were talking about moving too, and building a house because ours was so cool. So Jensen and I thought, hey, live close to us! We sold them a piece of our land and they built across the way. Then our friends Chad and Misha got married and wanted to do the same, so we sold them a piece of the land. Then our friends Danny and Chris wanted to get in on it, so we kind of formed this half-cul-de-sac just the four of us, so we decided to develop it a little more, and just go ahead and finish the cul-de-sac. So we built houses and sold them, then built that little park in the middle that you saw when you came in. Each house in our little circle has a couple of acres of back and front yard, which is really cool. And we all live super close to each other now. It’s really great.”
“That’s really funny!” Oprah laughed. “That’s an amazing thing, living so close to your friends.”
“Yeah,” Jensen agreed. “And we like our other neighbors too.”
“Well, it seems like we’ve just kind of settled in the kitchen,” Oprah laughed. “Do you want to stay here, and skip the tour?”
“Well, we could still skip the tour and go into the living room,” Jared suggested. “And you wanted to our kids too.”
“That’s right!” Oprah laughed. “Alright, that sounds like a plan. Kids, then living room, sound good?”
“Definitely!” Jensen and Jared replied.
They led Oprah out through the backdoor in the kitchen and walked around to the backyard. They had a large pool closest to the deck, and a large amount of manicured lawn with huge trees throughout and a small playground-type area towards the back near the tall wall of bushes that marked their yard, where Camille sat on the swing and watched the kids play.
Jensen waved as they started over and Camille grinned, standing. When they reached the playground, Camille extended her hand with a smile.
“Hi, Ms. Winfrey,” Camille said confidently. She had grown up to look very similar to Gen. “I’m Camille. It’s very nice to meet you.”
“What great manners you have!” Oprah exclaimed, shaking Camille’s hand. “It’s great to meet you, Camille. And you can call me Oprah.”
The boys ran over when they noticed the company, but JJ stayed back a little, hesitant at the new company. The boys jockeyed for Oprah’s attention while Jensen went over and swung JJ into his arms, carrying her to meet Oprah. Oprah shook both of the boy’s hands at Jared’s proposal and then smiled at JJ, who threw her arms around Jensen’s neck, burying her face for a moment.
“Sweetie, this is Oprah Winfrey,” Jensen cooed at the small girl, and Jared couldn’t help the squeeze in his heart. Jensen was great with the kids: wrestling with the boys and prompting JJ out of her shell. JJ, when alone, had become quite the little toughie. She could easily take down both her brothers, and would never jump when anyone tried to startle her, which Shep, Thomas, and Jensen tried to do often. JJ peeked out at Oprah and eventually stuck her hand out like she had seen Camille do.
“Hello,” she greeted quietly, still with cautious eyes, her voice soft.
“Hello there, cutie,” Oprah smiled at JJ warmly, which JJ responded to by leaning back from Jensen a little, her signal to be put down. Jensen put her back on the grass and she stood studying Oprah for a moment before breaking into a grin.
“You’re pretty,” JJ told Oprah and Oprah laughed. “And nice.”
“You’re very sweet,” Oprah told her.
“I’m going to go swing now,” JJ informed them, walking off. Camille followed diligently. Shep and Thomas, realizing they were free to go back to playing, left with a “Bye” in tandem.
“So those are our kids,” Jensen laughed.
“Energetic,” Oprah laughed. “JJ is a sweetheart.”
“That she is,” Jensen and Jared agreed.
“She’s sort of our little princess,” Jensen admitted. “And she knows it. She has definitely caught on that she can pretty much get us to agree to anything. Actually, all three of them can. We’re kind of pushovers.”
“That’s going to make for some fun teenage years,” Oprah pointed out. “Three teenagers at once, that will be an adventure.”
“We’re just enjoying the toddler years, if you don’t mind,” Jared laughed.
“So, do their names mean anything sentimental?” Oprah asked. “I know a lot of parents name their kids after family members.”
“No, our friends helped us pick out names,” Jensen told them. “Danny suggested Justice Jay, which we all liked. And I think it was Gen who helped the most in picking out the boys’ names.”
“Wow, so a very tight knit group of friends,” Oprah laughed.
“Oh, yeah,” Jensen laughed. “We’re all practically just one big family.”
“Don’t you have dogs?” Oprah wondered, looking around.
“They’re inside, actually,” Jensen explained. “They’re rather old, they don’t play as much as they used to. Sadie’s about fourteen now, and Harley is twelve.”
“Wow,” Oprah acknowledged.
“Yeah, they’re hanging in there,” Jared said a little sadly.
“Shall we go into the living room?” Jensen segwayed.
“Yes, we shall!” Oprah agreed. “Lead the way.”
Jensen and Jared led Oprah up and in through the large French doors that led from the living room to the patio. Sadie looked up from her dog bed, gave a few wags of her tail, and then laid her head back down. Harley just snored. Oprah looked around the rustic living room with a smile.
“You’re home is like a cabin in the forest,” Oprah commented.
“Yeah,” Jensen agreed. “Jared and I both like the rustic style. We made sure the land we purchased had lots of trees, and we tried to cut down as few as possible.”
“It’s beautiful,” Oprah stated, then spotted the mantelpiece above the fireplace, where there were a bunch of pictures. “May I?”
“Yes, of course,” Jensen and Jared agreed. She perused them, and grabbed the one in the middle.
“Oh, this one is amazing!” she said, holding it out for Jensen and Jared to see which one she picked.
“That’s my favorite,” Jared laughed. It was the one of the five of them in the pool. Jared stood in water up to his neck, helping Shep swim in a life jacket, with Thomas and JJ on a floaty behind him, and Jensen grinning at the camera.
“It’s a charming photo,” Oprah agreed. Jensen and Jared took a seat on the sofa and offered the chair to Oprah who took it graciously. “So, let’s get down to it: I’m here because you two have both written memoirs that were recently published together, in the same book.”
“Yes,” Jensen confirmed.
“Why did you choose to publish them as a single book?” Oprah asked. “Why not as separate books?”
“Well, we wrote both of our memoirs for our charity project,” Jared said. “And both sides of our story are very geared toward the specific subsidiaries of our charity: Jensen has a charity that allocates funds to different programs for abuse, for those who are abused or trying to get out of an abusive relationship. I have a charity that allocates funds to different programs that help people with depression, that help people keep fighting their depression. And both of our charities are under one umbrella. Writing our memoirs together is our way of showing that those who suffer are never alone, that they should always keep fighting, they they’re not alone in the fight.”
“Jensen, your past work reflects, to a certain extent, your experience with abuse, correct?” Oprah asked.
“To a certain extent, yes,” Jensen agreed. “I mean…at one point in my life I was in a very abusive relationship…and I had amazing friends who saved my life. But immediately after I got out of that situation, I turned to writing and no, a lot of my work wasn’t originally truly reflective of everything. The film that I won my first Academy Award for is only partially representative of the situation: it only dwelled on the physical aspects. However, my film Trauma was the first film that I wrote trying to specifically focus on the mental and the emotional toll. Then, the film after Trauma was primarily about the aftermath of being in an abusive relationship, the PTSD that goes with it, and how it affects your life. Those three movies, if you put them together, kind of display my own progression. However, I’ve also written movies that are about an array of other things. I’ve branched out a bit, now.”
“All your films usually have a darker undertone, am I right?” Oprah pondered.
“Yeah, I’ve always kind of been a cynic, even though I have this amazing life with an amazing man and fantastic kids and friends and everything,” Jensen shrugged. “Dark topics come easier to me. I’ve been trying to right a hopeful film for years, but I never think it’s good enough.”
“I’ve read it,” Jared confided. “It’s amazing.”
“He’s biased,” Jensen rolled his eyes, smiling.
Oprah laughed. “Based on your past films, I’m sure it’s very good. Now, the films you write are dark, but many of the roles you’ve played are on the lighter side, I’ve noticed. You’re the hopeful character, the visionary, the romantic.”
“That’s kind of my choice,” Jensen said. “I spend enough time writing dark things that sometimes, it can get a little bleak in my head. So, I view my acting career as a sort of reprieve from, some…let’s say, emotional weight.”
“And Jared, you’re on the other side of the coin,” Oprah turned to Jared. “In a lot of your films, you’re known for your aptitude to display emotions, especially truly portray sadness, anger, regret, etc.”
“Yeah, a lot of my roles are heavier,” Jared agreed. “I’ve been open with my history with depression. I fought it from a very young age, I fight it every day still, so I can kind of access myself through those roles.”
“Jensen uses acting as his reprieve, so what’s yours?” Oprah wondered.
“Coming home to Jensen,” Jared replied honestly. “The difference between Jensen and my careers is, as an actor, I’m playing a role. I’ll put myself into the role, and sometimes it takes a bit of time to come out of it, but at the end of the day, I return to my husband and my kids, and they’re my reprieve. Jensen, however, is always writing, I think. It’s a constant thing that he has to specifically focus on to stop, hence his focus on his roles in movies helps him. There have been times when we’ll be talking and he’ll be completely engaged in the conversation and then he’ll just hit pause for a moment, jot an idea down on a piece of paper or in his phone, and then return back to our conversation right where we left off. It’s just at the back of his mind.”
“You’re always the writer,” Oprah turned to Jensen.
“I guess,” Jensen shrugged.
“Are you thinking about a story right now?” Oprah asked.
“I don’t necessarily think in terms of stories…” Jensen frowned for a moment, rubbing at his temple absently. “I don’t know how to put it into words—ironically. I guess I more think in terms of descriptions, phrases, stuff like that.”
“We’ll look at a person and think, ‘Oh, they look sad’ and he’ll look at them and think ‘Rebecca stared forlornly at her shoes, the weight of the day pressing on her shoulders’,” Jared provided, looking at Jensen for confirmation.
“Yeah, like that,” Jensen agreed. “See, this is why we’re married. It’s not even necessarily related to my surroundings either. I could be having an in depth conversation about politics at the dinner table, and off at the back of my mind be thinking about characteristics of a person I’d passed on the street earlier that day. I don’t know…this is kind of hard to explain. You asked about right now, and before your question I was thinking about the way in which to describe the difference in the exact color of your hair in the sunlight, versus in the artificial but soft light of the living room. I hope that’s not too weird.”
“No, I’m flattered,” Oprah laughed. “I hope both lightings are becoming on my hair.”
“Oh, of course,” Jensen agreed with a chuckle.
“You two are both very substantial people,” Oprah told them with a large smile. “Do you have anything you’re both working on right now?”
“Getting the charities up and working is our biggest concern at the moment,” Jared told her. “We kind of both put projects on hold for just a little while so we can really cement the charities as best we can. All of our closest friends are in on it, and we’re hoping that we can help change lives—for the better of course.”
“And focusing on our kids, always,” Jensen added. “Parents in Hollywood are notoriously less present in their kids’ lives, regrettably. So we definitely try to carve time out for the triplets.”
“That is very honorable,” Oprah smiled. “Now, we just went through some weighty topics, so I want to end on a lighter note: love. I wanted to come back to how admired you two are, especially based on your relationship. Do you two fight at all?”
“Of course we have arguments, as every couple does,” Jared laughed. “But, no, we haven’t had any fights that really were substantial. Neither one of us has ever spent the night on the couch, neither of us has ever foregone doing the little things like saying ‘I love you’ on the way out the door to spite the other. We could be having a yelling match and Jensen will have to go to work and he’ll still say ‘I love you’, give me a kiss on the cheek, and then storm out.”
“But we have to work at our relationship as everyone does,” Jensen added. “I think we were just…lucky. I don’t believe in fate or destiny, but if I did, Jared would be the only evidence I would need.”
“Wow,” Oprah said, holding her hand over her heart. “That was beautiful.”
“It’s the writer in him,” Jared laughed, rubbing Jensen’s knee a few times before pulling away. “I think the reason we’re so good together is because he’s my best friend. I mean, that sounds corny, but it’s true. From the first time we met, we just…got along. I think our chemistry as a couple and as just people from the very beginning was just perfect. I asked him out the first time we met because we had talked the entire night like we’d known each other for our entire lives. It just worked.”
“And it’s been there for the past ten years?” Oprah asked.
“Yeah,” Jensen confirmed. “It’s been a great ten years.”
“Agreed,” Jared gave Jensen his most adoring smile.
“And are there any mysteries left in the relationship?” Oprah wondered.
“Oh, definitely,” they said in tandem, then laughed.
“Jared is very open, and I know him better than I know myself,” Jensen provided. “But there are still times when he surprises me.”
“Jensen will always be mysterious,” Jared laughed. “It’s just part of the whole ‘artist’ personality.”
“Can I get a for instance?” Oprah laughed.
“Oh! I got one,” Jared replied enthusiastically. “It’s not part of the artist personality that I just commented on, but for some reason, Jensen always smells like apples. Like, green apples. I don’t know why. Maybe he has apple juice instead of blood.”
“I bet your kids would love to hear that,” Oprah laughed.
“Dude,” Jensen turned to Jared with a furrowed brow and a disbelieving smile. “It’s my aftershave.”
Jared turned to Jensen with a look of bewilderment. “What?”
“It’s my aftershave,” Jensen said again.
“What?” Jared reiterated.
“Aftershave, darling,” Jensen blinked a few times. “What you rub on your face after you shave.”
“Your aftershave?” Jared sounded a little lost. Jensen laughed.
“Dude, I can’t believe you’ve lived with me for ten years and not once have you used my aftershave,” Jensen exclaimed. “Or even smelled my aftershave straight from the bottle.”
“It’s really your aftershave?” Jared cried.
“Yeah!” Jensen nodded, laughing still.
“Wow,” Jared threw up his hands. “Well, there goes all the mystery from this relationship.”
Jensen laughed harder. “Sorry, I didn’t know all my mysterious allure was you simply asking yourself vaguely, ‘Why does Jensen smell like apples?’ I’ll make sure to start rubbing strawberry jam on my neck so you’ll wonder why I taste so good.”
Jared and Oprah both laughed.
“Well, this has been very enlightening,” Oprah told them. “And I thank you very much for allowing me into your home.”
“Hey! Anytime,” Jared laughed. “And you don’t even have to come with cameras next time. We’ll even treat you to Jensen’s fine cooking.”
“I might just take you up on that,” Oprah grinned. They all stood and the entire camera crew followed Oprah out of the house. The main two immediately started dismantling and carrying their portable equipment to the vans they arrived in. The man with the camera that had arrived with Oprah kept rolling as she waved to them, and got into their car.
“Now they’ll film the part where Oprah bad mouths us all the way back to her studio,” Jared told Jensen, making Jensen snort. They waved one last time before heading back into their house.
“That went well,” Jared nodded appreciatively.
“Agreed,” Jensen laughed. “She’s so nice. I was honestly expecting to feel intimidated by her.”
Jared nodded then squinted at Jensen’s face. “Your aftershave? Really?”
“Yep,” Jensen nodded, smiling.
“You haven’t changed aftershave in ten years?” Jared asked.
“It’s good aftershave,” Jensen defended.
“Hey,” Jared grinned. “Knock knock.”
“Oh no,” Jensen sighed. “Who’s there?”
“Moustache.”
“Moustache who?”
“I moustache you a question, but I’ll shave it for later!”
“You’re ridiculous.”
“You love it.”
“Yes I do.”
The End