Chapter 7
In the five years that Harry had known Louis, he could say without a doubt that the boy had never been mean to him. Until now. Sure, the level of mean that Louis was operating on was that of a two year old who didn’t get their way or a newborn kitten who was testing out its claws, but still. It hurt. Harry had shown up to rehearsal tired after his night out with Nick and Taylor, but was rejuvenated when he saw the back of Louis’ head. The boy’s hair was messed up, and the back of his shirt was tucked into his diaper, leaving the back flap of it hanging out of his sweatpants. Luckily, no one was there besides the two of them yet, so Harry walked over to Louis and fixed his shirt. Louis gasped, turning around to see who it was. His face was a mixture of relief and something that was akin to anger when he saw that it was Harry. He walked away from him with a little huff, Harry smiling fondly at the little waddle that the diaper forced him to walk with.
He didn’t realize that anything was wrong until it was lunchtime and Louis hadn’t spoken a word to him.
“What do you want to get for lunch, Lou? I was thinking about Chinese takeout, sound good?”
Louis muttered under his breath before walking away, “Nothing with you.”
Harry watched as Louis lay on the couch in the studio throughout lunch, pretending to be napping instead of eating. He wanted nothing more than to go over to him, and feed him some of his food. He knew he couldn’t, though, not with all of the boys being in such close proximity to them.
When there was about an hour left of rehearsal and they’d finally gotten their clapping together for the bridge of Fireproof, Louis felt his stomach cramping up. For the fourth time that week, he found himself messing his diaper before he could stop it. He quickly scampered off, grabbing the bag that Alberto had left him on the floor and taking it to the bathroom to change. He was sobbing, unable to breathe. He was absolutely paranoid that one of the other boys had seen him, that his secret was out. Harry is a daddy, his mind taunted him, he probably knows exactly what you just did. He knew that Harry was disgusted by him, that’s why he wanted an older little, he didn’t want to have to deal with a baby like him. He was ashamed of himself, he couldn’t believe that he had lost all control of his body functions at the age of 21. When he was finished cleaning up, he rinsed his face off and tried to look as normal as possible.
He walked out, nodding to the boys when they asked if he was okay. Liam deemed their rehearsal over, and Louis started walking out, ready to find Alberto so he could get him home.
Harry rushed over to Louis, concerned by his quick exit earlier and how he exited with tear tracks evident on his face. “Loulou, are you okay? Can I do anything?”
Louis looked at him, eyes filling up with tears against his will. “No, Harry, you can’t do anything. Don’t worry about me; go home to Nick and Taylor. ‘M just a baby, you don’t want to help me, stop pretending you do.”
Louis walked off quickly, not wanting to hear Harry agree with him. It’d hurt too much to hear his worst fears confirmed even though he already knew they were true. Harry didn’t care about him, he only had to pretend out of pity, pity that Louis was a helpless baby and no one wanted him. Not his own mother, not any daddy on the face of the earth.
Harry was confused, to say the least, unsure of how Louis had jumped from point A to point Z so quickly. He thought about calling Louis’ name, telling him to come back, but he figured that he was just having a bad day. What really confused him was the mention of Taylor, unsure of what she had to do with any of this. Sure, him and Nick had been going to dinner with her, but she was just in town for once and telling him and Nick about the sub she’d met. She’d always kind of irked Harry, the way that she played coy about her classification, flitting about in different relationships with different subsets, but she was a nice girl. Harry was happy for her. But Louis? That was a different story. He hoped that the little was okay. It was hard giving the boy his space when all he wanted to do was hold him close and never let him go. But he wasn’t Nick’s and he wasn’t Harry’s, they had to give him his space and let him come to them when, IF, he wanted to. Harry just hoped it would happen, and it would happen soon.
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Niall was absolutely overjoyed when he got a call from Louis saying he needed help picking an outfit out for a date that Friday night. Niall drove over to Louis’ house after rehearsals the next day, drilling Louis with questions. Yes, it was a he. Yes, they were going out to dinner. Louis lied a bit, telling Niall he met him through Stan instead of explaining he met him on the Quench, which would give away his status as gads didn’t use the site.
The gad helped Louis pick out an outfit, black skinny jeans, because what else would he wear? and a maroon sweater. He had to explain to Niall that he would try the outfit on in the bathroom because he had a nasty bruise from playing footie with some mates that he didn’t want Niall to see. Louis was a bit self conscious at the way his jeans fit so tightly, making it obvious for anyone who was looking that he was wearing a diaper. He figured he was fine, though, because who would be looking closely? Hopefully only Carter, if anyone at all. Niall squeezed him tightly before he left, asking if Louis wanted a ride over to the restaurant. Louis turned him down, saying he was just going to take an Uber.
Louis never learned how to drive, his mom expressly forbidding him to learn when he was at home due to her suspicions of him being a little, and knowing that his secret would be found out if he signed up for lessons once in London. Littles were the only classification that weren’t allowed to drive, the fear of them falling into their headspace in the midst of driving far too big a danger for the little driving and those on the road around them.
Louis’ heart stopped when he got to the restaurant, he found it harder and harder to breathe as his date loomed closer and closer by the second. He could do this. He had to do this. He walked up to the elderly hostess at the front of the restaurant who showed no recognition of who he was, a good sign. He gave her Carter’s name as he was instructed to do, and she led him back to an empty booth in the far corner of the restaurant. Years of dealing with important people in the music industry had hammered it into Louis’ head to arrive everywhere at least five minutes early, so he wasn’t too worried about Carter not being there yet. He looked down at his phone, shaky hands scrolling through his twitter timeline.
“Louis?” He heard a man’s voice say. He looked up with a smile, seeing the man from the Quench in front of him. It was clear that his profile picture was a bit outdated; the man’s hair was more gray than blond, but it was okay. It was okay. Late 20s seemed a bit of a stretch, but Carter couldn’t lie on the website about his age, could he? Louis nodded shyly, unsure of proper etiquette. The man sat down when he realized that Louis wasn’t going to stand up to greet him.
“How are you, Louis?” Carter asked him, staring at him intensely.
“I’m good,” Louis said in a small voice, glancing up at the man. This was hard for him, the whole getting to know someone thing. After years of hiding himself, he found it especially difficult to trust people, to let them see who he really was.
Before he could reply, a waitress came over to ask for their drink orders. “Two Miller Lites please, that’ll be all,” dismissing her before she could even ask Louis if that was what he wanted.
Louis tried to breathe, unsure of how to tell Carter that he didn’t drink. He wouldn’t, he couldn’t. He’d just pretend to drink the beer… it’d be easy and painless. He didn’t want to upset the man when he was nice enough to even go out with Louis in the first place. The waitress came back with their drinks quickly, directing her question of whether or not they were ready to order to Carter.
Louis had heard of dominants that felt it was their duty to order for their sub and make most decisions for them. It was considered very old school, as it was indeed the year 2015. He didn’t even hear what Carter ordered for him, mind lost in thought and trying his best not to tense up when he felt Carter’s foot wrap around his leg from under the booth.
As soon as she left, he resumed conversation. It flowed pretty easily, Carter explaining that he was a computer technician. Louis let the man do most of the talking, as Carter seemed to like that.
“You’re good at this, aren’t you, Louis? Do you do this often?”
“Wh-what do you mean?” Louis asked, confused.
“Oh, little boy, you are good at this. You want to keep playing with Mr. Carter, don’t you? That’s okay, we can play, I’ll never say no to that.”
Louis tried not to let his confusion show, instead flashing a quick smile up at him, looking at the man from under his lashes.
The man inhaled a breath quickly, shaking his head, “Oh, yes, I have a feeling you’re going to be very good for me. Would you like to come back to my flat for some big boy playtime after we eat?”
“Um. What would you like to play? You mean, like, videogames?” Louis asked, unsure of what kind of playtime Carter was talking about. He tried to keep his tone light, but he was confused about what the man was asking. This was a lot different than he thought it’d be.
“No need to joke with me little boy, Mr. Carter knows what you want, you’re like all of the other little boys I’ve met, you just need a man to show you what to do, don’t you?”
Louis felt distinctly uncomfortable, scared that he finally understood what the man was hinting at. He smiled at him, unsure of what the proper reaction would be. He wanted nothing more than to leave.
“Does this sound nice to you? After we eat dinner, we can go back to my place and since you’re being such a good little boy you can suck on Mr. Carter like a bottle and have some of his special milk? Would you like that, I bet you would. I’ve never met a little boy who didn’t.”
The little felt tears welling up in his eyes. He had to get out of here, and he had to do it now. This was not what he was looking for, not at all. He slowly grabbed his phone from where it was in his front pocket, and let out a feigned sigh of annoyance.
“Sorry, sorry, I have to get this call, it’s from my boss. I’ll be right back.” Carter rolled his eyes in irritation, shooing him off. Louis was pleased with how steady his voice sounded, quickly moving off to the bathroom. By the grace of God himself it was a single stall, allowing him to lock the door, barring anyone from entrance. He started crying and hyperventilating as soon as the door was locked, curling into a ball on the ground. He didn’t know how he was going to get out of here, but he knew that he couldn’t leave with Mr. Carter. He felt like a stupid, stupid baby, not knowing exactly what the man was insinuating he wanted to do with Louis, but he was smart enough to know it was something sexual. Once he felt at least a bit safe, locked in and alone, he felt his mind go fuzzy. Some part of him knew that he was regressing, mind unable to cope with the stressors that the situation was presenting him with. He knew he had to figure a way out of the restaurant, not knowing how young he’d mentally become, it always depended on the situation, and with this one, Louis knew he’d probably not be able to speak coherently soon enough.
Working quickly, he called the only person he could think of to get him out of this situation and hoped with everything he had that they’d pick up. With teardrops splattering on his phone screen and hands shaking uncontrollably, he dialed.
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“It was so bad, Nick, it was like he didn’t want to even look at me. I’ve never felt so awful, I don’t even know what I did to him.” Harry complained, stabbing his salad with his fork.
Nick’s phone started ringing, he let out a small gasp, “Harry, shut up, it’s him.”
“Hello,” Nick said casually, eyes quickly widening. His face took on what Harry knew as his daddy face, and the younger man was immediately worried.
Nick listened to what the boy on the other line was saying, Harry only being able to hear what sounded like loud cries.
“Shh, shhh, love, you’re going to be okay, I promise. Don’t fret, don’t fret, I’m here. Can you tell me where you are?” Nick soothed in a soft voice. He looked at Harry and signed for him to grab the car keys.
“You’re at Giuseppe’s? Yeah, I’ll be there in less than five minutes, I promise, getting in the car now lovey. Just keep talking; you’re doing so well, being such a good boy. I’m going to give the phone to Harry now so I can drive, is that okay?”
Louis must have given him a positive affirmation, as Nick handed him the phone and started the car. They raced out of their garage and down into central London, only a few miles from their house.
“H-harry?” Louis sobbed, voice small.
Harry was taken aback by how young Louis sounded, unsure of what had affected the boy so much.
“Hiiii Loulou, I’m right here. Nick’s right, you’re such a good boy, and we’ll be there soon to pick you up. Are you doing all right?”
Louis shook his head, not remember that the man on the phone couldn’t see it. “No, ‘m scared. Big boy playtime,” he sobbed, unable to get a complete sentence out.
Harry tried to keep his breathing steady, wondering what in the hell Louis had gotten himself into.
“Oh, love, you don’t have to be scared, okay? Just keep talking to me, Nicky and I will be there very soon. Look, we’re pulling around back now.”
“I-I open the door now?” Louis asked.
“No! No, don’t open the door. Nicky and I will come through the back and get you. We’ll do a special knock on the door so you know it’s us, okay? We’ll stay on the phone so we can tell you when we’re right outside of the bathroom.”
Nick shut the car off, quickly exiting. He frantically gave a half-assed explanation to a chef who was smoking out back, the man opening the door to the kitchen. Thankfully the bathroom was in the same hallways as the kitchen, and no one was waiting to use it.
Nick knocked to the tune of Best Song Ever while Harry told spoke into the phone, telling the boy that they were right outside and to unlock the door. The lock clicked, and Harry opened the door cautiously, not wanting to knock the boy in the head if he was sitting right behind it. He opened the door wide enough for him and Nick to slip in, before shutting the door and relocking it. He let out an anguished noise at the sight before him, Louis in a small ball on the ground shaking and crying.
Nick rushed to the boy quickly, kneeling next to him and pulling him into an embrace.
“I-I want to leave,” Louis cried, hands gripping Nick’s shirt.
Nick cooed softly, wanting to ease the boy’s crying before they exited the restroom. “We can leave in just a minute, I promise. Can you tell me who you came here with, do you need to say goodbye?”
Louis let out a pained sob, “Don’t wanna say goodbye, don’t make me.”
Harry answered quickly, “No no no, you don’t have to if you don’t want to, love.”
“Thank you,” Louis choked out, relieved that he wouldn’t have to face the man again.
Nick stood up, slowly picking Louis up to stand on his feet. He would’ve had no problem carrying the boy out, but he quickly burrowed his face in his side, cries muffled.
Harry unlocked the door, quickly herding the two through the kitchen and back into the car. He hopped into the back seat, Nick lifting Louis into the car and shutting the door behind him. The boy looked disoriented for a moment before suctioning himself to Harry’s side, cries returning in full force now that he was saved.
“Thank you, thank you, thank you,” Louis cried, repeatedly patting Harry’s thigh with his small hand. Harry softly grabbed his hand, tangling their fingers together. The ride back to Nick and Harry’s home was silent except for Louis’ cries and Harry’s gentle cooing. Nick couldn’t help but look back every few moments, heart simultaneously breaking at Louis’ sadness, and fluttering at the way that he was being so unabashedly affectionate towards his boyfriend.
At some point Louis had crawled into Harry’s lap, making himself comfortable there. Harry was torn between the heavenly feeling of Louis’ weight and a pit of sadness at the way that something had happened to the boy to make him upset enough to call Nick and himself. When they arrived back home, Harry picked up a lethargic Louis and put him on his hip with ease. From where his hand was supporting the boy’s bum he could feel the padding of a diaper. Harry was unspeakably proud of the boy for having the confidence to wear protection in public. He carried Louis into the house, kicking the door shut behind him before moving to sit on the couch where Nick was waiting patiently. The jostling seemed to wake Louis up a bit; the boy whining and curling himself back into Harry’s chest. The younger man couldn’t help but think about how Louis was the perfect size for both him and Nick, fitting on their laps with ease.
Nick cleared his throat, knowing that there was an important conversation that needed to be had.
“Louis, love, are you okay?” Nick asked, starting with the most obvious question on his mind.
Louis hiccupped, “I’m scared.”
“Can you tell Harry and I why you’re scared? It’s okay to be frightened sometimes, but know that you’re safe at our house, and you’re being very, very brave.”
“You’re going to laugh at me,” Louis whispered, voice breaking.
“Lou, Nick and I would never laugh at you, okay? Something that scared you this much is nothing to joke about.”
“I-I met up with someone from the Quench. It said that we were 100% compatible. He looked nice. I was really nervous when I got there. It started okay, I guess. But then he ordered me beer; he didn’t let me say what I wanted. So I didn’t have anything to drink because, y’know, I don’t like alcohol. Then he ordered my food, but that was okay, he seemed like he really wanted to. I didn’t want to be mean to him.”
Nick and Harry’s minds were both racing at the thought of Louis being stuck in such a clearly uncomfortable situation, not having any idea of how to get out of it. The little boy sitting next to them was so sweet that he didn’t speak up to the man, didn’t want to hurt his feelings. They didn’t understand how anyone on this earth had served enough karmic justice to deserve him.
Louis continued, “There has t-to be something wrong with me. I know there is. He was just talking and I didn’t really understand? He told me that I was good at playing as a little, that he wanted to take me back to his flat. Have big boy playtime. He- he, ugh-“
He broke into a round of fresh tears, Nick and Harry both touching him softly.
“Don’t feel like you need to share, it’s okay, Louis,” Nick said, feeling bad over asking questions that so clearly traumatized the little.
“No, it’s not that. It’s just that it scared me so much, the way he talked to me. And that I realized I’m not normal. I’m messed up. I thought that maybe someone would want me as a little, and it all came crashing down around me. I’m stupid, so, so stupid. He told me he wanted to have big boy playtime and I asked what he wanted to play and if he had videogames. He told me to stop joking around and told me I could suck on him and have some of his special milk. I don’t even know what he meant,” by this point Louis was whispering, feeling completely defeated, “I’m dumb. He acted like I should know what he meant, that all good boys know what he’s talking about. I have no idea! I know it’s something naughty, though. And I can’t help but think… am I supposed to want that with my daddy? Because I don’t. I just want someone to love me and give me cuddles, I thought that’s what daddies do, but I was wrong. I’m so stupid, stupid, stupid. I haven’t even had my first kiss, a world famous popstar who hasn’t had his first kiss and doesn’t even know what daddies want from little boys.”
Louis was silently crying, while Harry and Nick shared a look over his head. They both were upset for the boy, unable to hear him call himself a terrible name again without having a breakdown. And they truly wanted to cry at the boy putting his innocence into words. He was the purest, sweetest, most innocent little boy they’d ever come across, and they had never dreamed of finding a little who was so perfect and lovely.
“First off, baby, you need to stop calling yourself mean names. You aren’t stupid; please trust me. You are smart and lovely and wonderful and a perfect little. I wouldn’t lie to you about that. And like Nick told you last week, everyone is different. If you want to have a grownup relationship with your daddy, that’s okay; if you want your daddy to be just a daddy, that’s perfectly normal and okay. That man is not a very good person if he just expected you to want to do grownup activities with him. I’m very proud of you for calling Nick when you were uncomfortable. You did the right thing. No daddy or mommy or any person on this earth should make you feel uncomfortable. An important part of relationships is talking through things, making sure that both you and your dominant are both comfortable. You don’t need to do anything with your daddy that you don’t want to, okay? I want to repeat that it’s completely normal to want a daddy that’s just a daddy. Nick and I aren’t looking to do adult things with our little, we just want someone to love and give cuddles.”
Louis looked up at Harry, tears still shining in his blue eyes, “And Taylor is okay with that? She doesn’t want you to do… stuff with her?”
Harry looked at him, confused, “What’s Taylor got to do with anything?”
Looking at him like it was the most obvious thing in the world, Louis replied, “She’s your little?”
Nick and Harry had to swallow their laughter, not wanting Louis to think that they were laughing at him. “She’s not our little, babe.”
“But- but… are you sure? She’s perfect for you, the older little girl you said you wanted!”
The older man looked to Harry, giving him the chance to explain his stupid hypothetical situation away. Harry sighed, “Louis, that wasn’t the depiction of our ideal little. It was just me giving a hypothetical situation. We don’t want an older little girl, we don’t want a little girl at all.”
Nick chimed in, “We want a very little boy who is sweet and full of love. We don’t want him to do grownup stuff with us, we just want to give him all of the cuddles, kisses, and love in the world.”
The daddies watched Louis’ reaction to Nick’s words, knowing that this was the moment that they were waiting for. They waited to see if he would take their bait and ask them what they so terribly wanted to be asked. No matter how much they wanted to, they wouldn’t ask him to be their little. The boy was so clearly insecure and scared of rejection that he would say yes to please them, even if he didn’t want to be their little.
“When I was crying in the bathroom, I could feel my head going fuzzy. It’s been happening a lot lately. All I could think of was getting help. My fingers kinda dialed without me even thinking. I was scared you wouldn’t pick up,” Louis looked up at Nick, hesitance in his eyes, “but I’m glad you did. When I think about it, I’ve always felt protected by you. Do you remember the time at the bar? You didn’t even know me, and you still helped me.”
Nick smiled, thinking of how painfully out of place Louis had looked seated at the bar, “You were trying to order a water, and the bartender thought you were pulling his leg. I’m glad I walked up; you looked so lost and alone. I felt terrible.”
“That was the first time I really talked to you. And you helped me. I think I knew that you’d help me tonight. And Hazza, you’ve been there for me more than anyone I’ve ever met. You always give me hugs and love. No one’s ever done that for me. When I’m lying in bed some nights, I let myself think about what it would be like if I really let myself be a little. My mind it always drifts to you two, thinking about what good daddies you’d be. How I’d be lucky if I found someone half as good to me as you two are.”
“Would you let us be lucky enough to have the chance to show you what good daddies we can be to you?” Nick asked, stomach clenching in nervousness.
Louis looked back at Harry awkwardly because of the way he was sitting on his lap before looking to his left at Nick, the look on his face only able to be described as incredulous.
“I’m no good, I’ve told you a buncha times. My hands shake so much I can barely eat, my brain makes it hard for me to think of the words to say, I have to use a diaper, and I don’t even know what big boy playtime is.”
“Louis, we’ll tell you until we’re blue in the face that everyone is different. And we want you. Sure, some people want littles who are potty-trained and able to be independent, and that’s good for them. But Harry and I want a little little, for lack of a better term. We want to be there to help you and love you, if you let us. As a part of loving you as much as we do and caring for you as much as we want to, that means respecting your desires and ours. Like I said earlier, we don’t want to do grownup things with our baby, with you. There will never be any big boy playtime; it’s not something we will ever teach you about or talk about, you never have to think about it again. We know that this will be a learning process for all three of us, and we can move as slowly or quickly as you want to.”
The little nodded his head, looking between them with a genuine smile on his face. “Okay. I want to try. But don’t feel bad if you find someone else, a better little boy. It’ll be okay, I understand.”
Harry kissed the back of Louis’ head, knowing they still had mountains of work to do when it came to building the boy’s confidence up. “We won’t change our minds, we promise.”
Louis’ stomach let out a growl, providing the perfect end to the conversation for now.
“Looks like it’s time for someone to eat dinner! Is there anything in particular you want?” Harry asked, not moving yet.
“Whatever you have is good with me, haven’t had anything besides takeout lately. ‘M scared to cook anything with the way my hands have been shaking, I’m sure you remember me cutting my hand,” Louis said sheepishly.
“I’m sure we can whip something up, but first, do you need a change?” Harry asked, able to feel the weight of Louis’ wet diaper from where he was perched on his legs.
Louis blushed, nodding his head minutely, “I don’t have anything with me, I kinda forgot to bring any spares to the restaurant.”
Luckily Nick and Harry were extremely hopeful people as well as prepared.
“Harry and I bought a pack or two in case you ever ended up coming here.” Louis blushed, feeling warm at the thought of the men going out to buy something just for him, even if it was just diapers.
“Ready to go?” Harry asked, patting out a rhythm on the little’s thighs. Louis stood up, waiting for the men to guide him wherever the diapers were.
Harry couldn’t help himself, grabbing Louis’ little hand and walking him up the stairs. As they were about to embark upstairs, Louis stopped, sure that his decision was the correct one.
“Nick… if you want to come upstairs you can. I-I’m okay with you changing me. You don’t have to if you don’t want to. But I trust you. I know you won’t make fun of me.”
The man in question walked to Louis, giving the boy a kiss on top of his head. “Thank you, love, that means a lot to me. I’d be happy to change you any time you want.”
Louis was reminded of how much he loved Harry and Nick’s house every time he was over, loving the leather furniture and spacious rooms. Upstairs, he couldn’t help but take a peek at the two empty rooms that he knew Nick and Harry were saving for their little’s room and their playroom. There was a feeling of ridiculous happiness that entered him, and he hoped it wouldn’t leave for a long, long time. They stopped once in Nick and Harry’s room, the younger man laying out a towel on the floor for Louis to lie on. Their room was a pale blue color, huge windows lining the windows and a huge bed with a fluffy, white duvet dominating the space.
The little lifted a shaky hand to the button of his jeans to attempt to undo them, but Harry helped him and popped them open easily. The boy let out a moan of relief as the jeans were pushed down his legs and off of his body, relieved to no longer be in such uncomfortable material.
Harry clucked his tongue in sympathy, “We’ll have to find you some more comfortable trousers, huh?” Louis nodded in agreeance.
He laid back as Nick reentered the room with changing supplies, dressed only in his sweater and a diaper.
“Sorry for not having a proper changing pad, we’ll have to go shopping for a lot of new things. Would you like that?”
Louis blushed, trying to focus on the conversation instead of the fact that Nick Grimshaw was ripping the tabs of a wet diaper that he was wearing open.
“You don’t have to buy me anything, really,” Louis answered.
Harry made an affronted sound, “Of course we do! We have two big rooms in our house saved just for you, if, you know, you want them. You don’t have to move in here just yet, but when you want to you can.”
“Okay, Hazza, whatever makes you happy. I trust you both, you can paint and pick out whatever you want, ‘m not picky, you know that.” Harry smiled, happy to have won that small battle.
“You know the best part about having two daddies?” Harry asked, watching fondly as his boyfriend gently cleaned the little- their little. Louis shook his head, egging Harry on. “One of them gets to give you tickles while you’re getting changed!” Harry rucked Louis’ shirt up, tickling all over the boy’s stomach. Louis let out a peal of giggles, the sound heavenly to both Nick and Harry’s ears.
“All done!” Nick exclaimed, checking to make sure the diaper was just right, “Let’s get you changed, I’m sure that sweater isn’t very comfy.”
Nick made to clean up the little mess and wash his hands while Harry took Louis over to a set of their drawers, picking out a big t-shirt of Nick’s for the boy to wear after he said he didn’t want to wear pajama pants. Despite the way that it was pitch black outside, he was surprised when he saw a bedside clock that read that it was 10:30pm.
Louis couldn’t help but be a bit uncomfortable with all of this, sitting as Harry and Nick insisted on making his dinner. He couldn’t stop thinking about the way that they answered him so simply, telling him that it was their job to do things for him, that they wanted to take care of him. It was a concept that was so new to him, he couldn’t understand why anyone would want to take care of him, but he wouldn’t complain. They seemed genuinely happy to be making grilled cheese for him, floating around each other and throwing him happy smiles. It would take him a while to get used to being fawned over; he actually wasn’t sure if he’d ever be okay with it.
One thing that had always struck him about Harry was how thoughtful he was. The way that he would sign to a fan if he saw that they were deaf, how he would bend down and make a disabled fan feel like they were a million bucks, it was the little things. And it seemed as though it wasn’t just Harry who was unbelievably thoughtful, it was Nick as well. Nick brought him a glass of milk to the table, a straw inside the cup, “so he didn’t have to pick it up and have it spill”. Louis was grateful for the kindness.
The men had eaten dinner earlier, but they sat with Louis while he ate grilled cheese, talking to each other and telling silly stories that made Louis laugh. He realized that he may not feel completely comfortable with the dynamics of a daddy/ little relationship, but he was at ease with Harry and Nick, and that was a start.
It didn’t go unnoticed that Louis’ head was bobbing sleepily by the time he was finishing up his sandwich, eyes barely able to stay open. Harry had always assumed that Louis went to sleep early because he liked to sleep, but now he realized it was because his headspace was so young. An earlier bedtime was definitely something that he and Nick would enforce, wanting Louis to be as healthy and alert as possible.
“Looks like it’s bedtime for you, love,” Nick said, chair squeaking as he pushed it back to stand up. He walked over to Louis, grabbing the boy whose head was now resting on the edge of the table and picking him up. The boy was light, Nick able to easily lift him on his hip, Louis’ head fitting perfectly against his shoulder. He walked upstairs slowly, not wanting to jostle the sleeping boy. Harry moved ahead of him, making sure the guest bedroom was set up and the sheets were drawn back. Entering the guest room, he placed Louis down on the bed, making sure he was lying comfortably before pulling up the sheets.
“Goodnight Loulou,” Harry whispered, he and Nick leaning over at the same time to press kisses on the boy’s cheeks. Louis lethargically lifted his arms, softly patting the men’s shoulders, making them chuckle.
“G’night,” Louis mumbled, falling asleep as the daddies watched from the doorframe.
Once in their room, Harry pulled Nick in for an enthusiastic kiss, squeezing him tightly. This was it; he was finally their little boy. They knew it would be a long road of recovery for Louis, and that it would take a while for them to get him comfortable with who he was, but they were ready for it.