i am not getting stabbed (in the name of science)

Marvel Cinematic Universe Jessica Jones (TV) Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV) Thor (Movies)
F/F
F/M
Gen
G
i am not getting stabbed (in the name of science)
Summary
"... I am not dying for six college credits!" || Tumblr prompt fills for Darcy Lewis and the MCU, to get my muse going. 29. darcy/lance hunter, winter30. ocean's eleven au (part three)31. darcy/remy lebeau, ex-lovers32. darcy/johnny, soulmates (part four)33. darcy + power of social media (part two, ft. deadpool)34. darcy/pietro, soulmates35. darcy/tony, the one that got away36. darcy/steve/bucky, misunderstandings in love37. darcy/steve, insecurity (christmas fic)38. darcy/bucky, love39. darcy/bucky, red room!darcy
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holiday | darcy/lance hunter, winter

“This is not what I meant when I said a cabin in the woods.”

“It’s a bloody cabin, woods and everything!” Hunter turned to look at her incredulously, as if he couldn’t understand why she was so angry. “And we’re in the woods, what more do you want?”

Darcy gaped. Okay, so… maybe he just really was that clueless. “I was talking about the ski cabin up in Vermont that my family used to rent, you idiot!” Darcy stamped her feet into the snow angrily, glaring back at him as comprehension bled into his eyes. “Not a shed in the middle of Appalachia with no form of heating!”

“No… right.” Hunter stared at her, then down at his feet, and Darcy bit her lip when he looked up at her with a forced smile. For all that Lance was a SHIELD agent, the man couldn’t wear a good poker face to save his own life. “Right. You’re right, it’s a half-day’s drive from the nearest airport… you can be back in New York by the morning, I… I’ll start the car.”

He stalked past her, his features twisted into a mixture of hurt and anger, and Darcy swallowed as guilt bubbled up in her chest. “Babe, I – ”

He didn’t reply, just muttering to himself angrily as he strode towards the car, and when she followed after him she caught the end snippets of his self-berating tirade.

“… of course she’s mad, out in the middle of nowhere – ”

“Hunter – ”

“ – such a bloody idiot – ”

“Hunter, listen to me – ”

“ – couldn’t even take her somewhere nice without fucking it all up – ”

“Lance!” He flinched, looking up and blinking in surprise when she saw him standing behind him. “I’m… I didn’t mean to yell.”  

“Yeah, well, I right well fucked things up, so I don’t blame you,” he muttered, and he looked so angry with himself that Darcy felt all her anger melt away.

“Hey.” She reached out, and when he grudgingly took her hand she pulled him towards her, wrapping her arms around his waist and pressing her face into his chest. “I’m sorry, you tried to make this special and I was… I wasn’t expecting it, that’s all.”

“I know, I just…” Hunter gingerly settled his hands on the small of her back, sighing into her hair. “Just wanted to make our first holiday together special.”

Darcy’s heart warmed, and she pulled back just enough so she could lean up and press a kiss to his stubbled cheek. “Thank you for trying. Really.”

He turned his head, staring down at her with heavy-lidded eyes, and reached up to cradle her face in his hands. Languidly, he tilted her head up slightly, leaning down and slanting his mouth over hers – he licked into her mouth and tongue, using the opportunity to suck at her lower lip until Darcy whimpered, pressing her body against his as she tried getting closer.

He pulled back, a smirk forming when she tried to follow him, but the intention in his eyes made her pause. She knew that look – it was his ‘I’ve just thought of something brilliant’ expression, which to his credit, often did herald some crazy hair-brained plan that ended up working out in the end.

“What are you thinking?” she asked cautiously, and Hunter’s face lit up with a sly grin.

“Just thought of something,” he said, glancing at the little cabin behind her, and then looking back at Darcy. “No heat means we’ve got to keep warm in other ways, yeah? A week of sharing body heat doesn’t sound too bad, love. Clothing optional, of course, if you catch my drift…” 

He wiggled his eyebrows, and as much as the idea of it was appealing, Darcy was a pragmatist. “Then what about food?”

“Got some stuff before we left, but I could always hunt,” he shrugged, gesturing out to the snowy woods around them. “And besides – ” he said, smiling down at her wickedly, “ – although I enjoy the occasional bit of rabbit or deer, there are far more delicious things I’d prefer to eat.”

He trailed his hands down her sides, kneading circles into her hipbones, and Darcy swore that her cheeks were so warm that the falling snow was melting on her skin. 

“What d’you say, love?” he murmured, his breath ghosting across her ear as he nuzzled into her neck.

All Darcy could manage was a strangled choking sound before pulling him back towards where their bags laid in the snow, Hunter laughing behind her. 


In the end, it turned out that Hunter didn’t pack enough food for more than three days. The silver lining of this was that Darcy had a hell of a time watching him traipse through the snow in little more than a tight Henley and jeans and boots, seemingly immune to the cold as he checked and reset traps, bringing back a few rabbits and a pheasant on one special occasion.

Darcy herself spent the majority of the week naked on the queen-sized air mattress set up in the middle of the cabin-slash-shed, buried in a heap of blankets and pillows. And when Hunter wasn’t bringing back food or collecting wood or cooking them dinner, he had his head buried between her thighs, licking at her until Darcy couldn’t stand it anymore and hauled him up to get on with it.

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