Chapter 1
Honestly, you hadn’t expected to make it out of the Game, not in this form or either of your previous ones. Your name is Davespr- Nepet- Davepeta? What a meowthful…mouthful. Shit, this is complicated.
You’re a Game Construct, a doubled one at that. There’s no conceivable reason why you should have made it out alive, and yet here you are! ...Well, sort of. The Game decided to reconfigure you into a full human when it spit you out into the new universe. It still feels weird, but you suppose it makes sense- the oldest part of you was Dave, a human, so… You’re stuck with this form, although you’re decently content with it. Yeah, you miss your wings and your sharp little fangs, but it’s kind of nice being totally humanized. Plus your hair is much easier to style without those horns getting in the way (because any version of Dave has to have perfectly styled hair, obviously).
Violently green eyes stare back at you from the mirror. There’s a spot of sectoral heterochromia in the left one, creating a thick sliver of bright amber. It's reminiscent of your previous form, flashing like the juiciest tangerines and keylimes, and you absolutely love it.
It is day number two since the Game ended and you still hadn’t left your hiveblock to actually socialize with the other survivors (all of which are either humans or trolls; you were the only Sprite to make it out alive. You mourn the loss of ARquius deeply close to your heart). So far, the majority of your free time has been spent getting accustomed to your new form, and lowkey contemplating your own existence and place in the universe. So far, you’ve concluded that you don’t have much of a place at all. A painful grip clenches around your chest and, fuck, you have to move away from the mirror and distract yourself.
Food?
Yes, food sounds good.
You peek out into the hallway and see the bathroom is currently in use by Roxy. The shower is running and she’s singing along with some future electro-pop song, and you can’t help but grin. You love Roxy, she’s probably your best friend. The few interactions you’ve had since the Game ended have been with her, and she’s incredibly amazing. You’re glad she decided to take the room next to yours.
The apartment complex is laid out in a semicircle, spread across the land instead of built up, which you’re thankful for (a skyscraper apartment building would send both you and Dave into PTSD flashback mode and you so don't need that). You share a bathroom with Roxy, and the two of you share the kitchen and living room with John, Dave, and Karkat. The boys are in the two rooms at the end of the other hallway. You try to avoid thinking about Dave and Karkat sharing a room. You fail spectacularly. It is now very much on your mind.
“G’morning,” John yawns as you both enter the kitchen from separate halls. “Rox made coffee I think.”
“Mhm, I could smell it.” You pour yourself a cup with a generous amount of vanilla creamer, and part of you nearly purrs in delight. You’re about to turn and offer John a cup, but he’s suddenly floating beside you, reaching up into the cupboard to get a mug. “If you keep flying everywhere you’re gonna get fat.” You smirk and poke at the bit of his belly exposed beneath his shirt.
“Gah, Davesprite!” he yelps and wiggles away, nearly dropping his mug in the process. You can’t help but giggle because he looks extra dorky. “For your information, smarty pants, I do plenty of walking, I’ve earned my right to fly! Also, Roxy alchemized me some roller skates so I’ll still get lotsa exercise.” He’s pouring himself some cereal as he talks, and you notice his mug is filled with hot chocolate rather than coffee. What an absolute dweeb. He sits down beside you at the kitchen table and starts munching on his knock-off fruity pebbles.
“Roller skates? Couldn’t even get you some blades? You’ll look like one of those pedophiles that hang out around skating rinks because they think they’re cool.” You’re giggling again, nearly snorting into your coffee. John is too busy munching to notice.
“Bleh, you’re just jealous,” he says, and sticks out his tongue at you. A half-chewed, pebbly rainbow stares back at you. He’s gross, so you kick his shin beneath the table.
“I have no idea what the hell you’re talking about,” Karkat grumbles as he enters the kitchen. “But I highly doubt anyone would be jealous of you, Egbert.”
Nnnnh, shit. You expected Karkat to sleep in. You hide your face in your mug and gulp down the sweet, sugary coffee, staring at the liquid with feigned interest. Maybe if you stay quiet and keep guzzling the caffeine, he’ll go away quicker. Your plan backfires as you finish off your cup, and he sits down at the table, beside John and across from you.
“Hey,” he says, staring directly at you.
“Hm,” you articulate brilliantly. Haha, fuck. Your face is flushed, and you bounce to your feet to refill your mug. Extra extra creamer, and this time you do let out a satisfied purr as you bring the cup to your lips. You opt to stand in front of the coffee maker on the counter instead of sitting back down in order to save yourself some embarrassment, and listen to John’s continued blabbering.
“-and Jane said she could make tiny, little dragons, but Terezi got all pissy because she wants big ones!” He’s flailing his arms as he explains this dilemma to Karkat. “But we can’t have big dragons running around, that would be a disaster, you know? I just hope she doesn’t convince Jane to actually go through with it, though I don’t think Jade would let her do it either.” He lets out an honest to god ‘humph’ as he crosses his arms, glaring at his now empty cereal bowl. “Why does she have to continue being hard headed and reckless, she knows how much danger all her messing around can cause.”
You hide your grin behind your coffee. “Sounds like a beautiful kismessitude, I can almost see the spades flying in the air.”
Karkat snorts at your comment, and your stomach does flips.
“Ugh, she is just so frustrating!” John groans.
“That’s the point of your relationship, dipshit,” Karkat says. “If she’s annoying you, do something to annoy her right back.” He slurps his coffee in the most unappealing way, but it’s beautiful.
“Hm. I do have those roller skates now…,” he muses with a grin, then hops up from his seat. “Thanks Karkat! I’m gonna go prank the pants off of her!” You wolf-whistle in his direction, and his face turns pink just before he sends you a glare, then disappears into his room. You feel so giddy inside; the blackrom between John and Terezi is one of your favorite ships.
“And here I thought he was hopeless,” Karkat scoffs. Shit, you forgot that you’re alone with him now. Fuck, what do you do?? Engage in conversation? Yes, good, good idea.
“Those two are purrfect for each other,” you say. “It's nice to see John enjoying a kismesitude.”
“Mmh, it’s sickening how pitch she is for him,” he turns to glance at you while he talks. “I can’t fucking believe I was pitch for the both of them at some point.”
What the fuck do you say to that?
“Ah, hm…” You sound like a moron. Quick, turn around and get more coffee! Hopefully you can distract yourself long enough for Roxy to bounce out of the bathroom.
“By the way, uh,” Karkat is talking to you again. Shit, now you have to turn back and face him. “We were wondering if you had decided on a name or whatever.”
Oh.
“Oh.” You hadn’t thought much more about it. Every time you do, it makes your head spin and your mind threatens to splinter off into different pieces (you passively wonder if this is how Dirk feels when integrating memories from all his different selves). “I really have no idea. I can’t be Dave, since we’ve got one of those already. But it doesn’t feel right to take Nepeta’s name…”
“You’re the only Nep we have now though,” he offers, turning to meet your eyes. Shit, it feels like your insides are melting.
“M-maybe,” you shrug and hide behind your mug once again. “I dunno.”
Roxy comes bounding into the kitchen clad in leggings and a sports bra, and you are filled with the sudden, overwhelming belief in a god.
“Gooooodmorning, pretty kitties!” she sings as she makes her way to the fridge. Bleh, she’s eating that gross Greek yogurt again, you have no idea how she can stomach the stuff (milk products are not supposed to be filled with bacteria and shit, okay? It’s just disgusting).
“Hey Roxy!” Your smile meets hers, and it’s genuine.
“What’s up sweetie pie?” she asks, plopping her butt on the counter. She licks at the top of her yogurt and you have to suppress a gag. It’s even grosser than John’s earlier presentation of half chewed cereal was.
“And why the fuck are you so cheery this morning?” Karkat grumbles in a way that you know he doesn’t mean.
“Um, we’re the rulers of our own brand new universe, with an unlimited supply of pretty much anything we could ever ask for, and you think I need a reason to be happy?” Roxy quirks an eyebrow at him. “Maybe I should ask why you’re so grumpy. Trouble in paradise? Does my son need a talking to?”
She winks and licks at a spoonful of yogurt.
“Other than the obnoxious snoring?” Karkat rolls his eyes. “No, Dave is a perfect fucking saint.”
“Damn right I am,” Dave says as he enters.
Welp, that’s your cue to leave. You sneak past Karkat and Roxy shoots you an inquisitive look, which you manage to ignore. Escape successful, you enter your room once more to find Frigglish curled up on your pillow. He mewls softly as you pick him up and set him in your lap, stroking his fur until he’s purring. You pay extra attention to the space between his ears, since he especially seems to like that.
“Ya know, if this keeps up, I’m thinkin of just giving you custody,” Roxy giggles, and you look up to see her leaning against the doorframe. You offer a smile as she sits beside you. Frigglish blinks his four eyes at his owner, then settles back in your lap. It feels like a small victory.
“Couldn’t help but notice your escape back there.”
Nnnh…you really don’t want to talk about this. You nuzzle the mutant kitty.
“Hey, c’mon,” Roxy’s voice is softer, and you can feel the warmth of her hand on your shoulder. “I’m totally with you here, I know how shitty it feels to like somebody who doesn’t feel the same way.”
“Bluh,” you articulate intelligently. “I don’t wanna talk about it.”
“Ignoring it won’t make it go away,” she sighs.
Something inside of you snaps, and you sit up and turn to her. “It’s not fair, it’s completely not fair! I’ve known him practically since we were wrigglers, we were such good friends, fur such a long time,” you huff, tears prickling in your eyes. Your memories are blurring again, and your head throbs. “It’s…it's total shit.”
“I know hun,” Roxy frowns. She runs a hand through your hair, tucking a flippant curl behind your ear. Her touch is so comforting, you lean into it. Her actions are incredibly pale and you shouldn’t indulge, but you do, because you need it.
“For the longest time, the world was just me and Dirk,” she speaks, her tone soothing. “And I loved him, like, actually really loved him, and he knew it. He just couldn’t love me back. It hurt for the longest time, and I fought against it too. Like, I even thought about askin him to be moirails, just so I could be with him in some way! But ya know, I thought about it a lot and realized that I was still lucky to have him as a friend.”
“Mmh,” you hum and lean against her shoulder. Tears land on Frigglish’s back, but you think he’s sleeping. “You and Dirk aren’t moirails?”
“Heh, no, even as I considered it I realized it wouldn’t work. I’m as single as you are, pretty kitty.” Her arm wraps around you, head leaning over your own. Fuck.
“You won’t be alone for long,” you tell her. “I think John is flush fur you…anyone would be lucky to have you, in any quadrant.”
She’s silent, and you wonder if you fucked up, until you feel her squeezing you into a hug. You nearly choke, her grip is so tight. When she pulls back, she’s got the most brilliant smile on her painted lips.
“You’re such a sweetie,” she says. Her thumb brushes a tear away from your cheek, and you have to resist the urge to nuzzle against her hand. “You need anything before I go out for the day?”
“Nah,” you say coolly. Your composure is completely intact, if you ignore the remnants of tears streaked down your face. “I’ll keep Frigglish company. We’ll chill together.”
“Sounds good,” she smiles and stands up. You’re mourning the loss of her warmth already.
Once the door clicks shut, you let yourself fall backwards onto your bed, groaning with the distress of every single part of you. The mutant cat meows in disapproval as he moves to situate himself on your pillow. Beyond the walls of your room, you can hear Karkat yelling about something while Dave laughs at him, and it makes your insides twist up in the most nauseating way.
Why did this have to happen? Did you really do that awful of a job as a Sprite that you’re being eternally punished like this? The universe just has to dangle the one object of your love in front of you, making it impossible for you to reach. Meanwhile, a more “real” version of part of you is allowed to be happy. It isn’t fair, you don’t deserve this. Maybe you do. Ugh, fuck, your head is throbbing as the splinters of your personality battle it out. Remain hopeful or give in to despair?
This would be so much easier if Equius were here, if you had a moirail. Then you could at least stop feeling so pathetic and alone. Another wave of loss sweeps over you, and tears are inevitable. They spill down the sides of your face, and you sniffle quietly. You’ve decided this isn’t fair. It hurts, and you don’t know what to do. You curl around Frigglish, capturing the warmth he gives off, and squeeze your eyes closed. Sleep is easy, you can deal with sleep. It comes quickly, and you thank the gods that there are no more dream bubbles to haunt you with memories.