Chapter 4
The rest of the day goes by in a hitch, or at least in a way that could be described as not completely garbage. Giving Lafayette his number ends up simultaneously being the best and worst decision of his life, seeing as soon as the newfound group of four breaks for 6th period, Alex's phone is bombarded with messages. Most of them are various forms of thanks, but towards the end of the day, most of them are what he assumes is Lafayette's way of "helping".
Laf: so do you have interest in doing a song from little shop or will u sing a song from another musical?
A.Ham: y do u ask?
Laf: i may have a few suggestions :)
A.Ham: surprise me
Laf: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8U-5DZDHNUw&list=RD... I think if u want to he Seymour this would be excellent!!
A.Ham: who the fuk is seymour again
A.Ham: no offense i have no idea what little shop is even about
Laf: no problem! seymour is the lead, he's awkward and nerdy and once u really think about it, an ass
Laf: but I love him anyway!
A.Ham: thx but no thx fam
A.Ham: im not lead material???? like at all???
A.Ham: got any other suggestions?
Laf: u could be Mr. Mushnik?
A.Ham: im on the Wikipedia page for it and he's still a main character NEXT
Laf: .........Audrey 2?
A.Ham: the plant has lines
Laf: ;)
Thursday eventually rolls around without (much) incident. He had only exchanged a few quick, heated words with Jefferson every now and then, which, considering, is pretty damn extraordinary. Angelica helps him acclimate himself to the highways and byways of Ashburton High, and gives him the occasional tip on surviving the wrath of John Adams.
"Turns out, if your handwriting is sloppy enough, he doesn't even read the timed-writings. He just slaps a 93% on it without even trying. Don't ask why it's a 93. No one knows." She stirs her blue crab soup absentmindedly. Alex still eats with the Schuylers at lunch, if not only to round them out so they don't look like such outcasts. However, Eliza hadn't been lying when she said they had friends, as Angelica is often spotted with a group of people hanging into her every word at any given time throughout the day. Eliza and Peggy certainly have less companions than their older sister, but still enough to never be considered a loner. As much as he wants to know just why they can't sit with any of these people who clearly enjoy their presence, he doesn't want to offend the girls, lest he receive an ass-whooping so great he may not be able to move ever again.
John continues to invite him to the office (which Alex still doesn't know belongs to) for lunch, but he always politely declines. He figures that indulging himself with John's presence too often might give him silly things like "Hopes" and "Dreams". They still always meet up with each other in the morning in front of Alex's locker, and they always text, so it's not as if he's avoiding John of anything.
Okay, maybe he is. But, after agreeing to doing the musical just because John smiled at him, Alex realizes that he needs to start curbing the weird hold John has on him. It didn't make a lick of sense to the boy.
Regardless, he still finds himself fantasizing about taking him to a place that isn't as controlled as school or the salon; a place where they can just kick back and be without fear of rejection or interruption. A place where they can talk about what's really eating at them and know that what they're saying is being understood. A place where Alex can adorn John's hair with flowers (those expensive ones that you have flown in from, like, Japan or some shit, not the pathetic ones that grow in the community garden across from Alex's apartment), and watch as the sun catches his freckles just so--
Whoever said "absence makes the heart grow fonder" was a dick, he decides.
Angelica has had it. She's Done, with a capital D. The entire world around her could erupt in flames and she wouldn't care.
She hits the "ignore" button of her FaceTime app for the sixth time that day and takes the extra step of turning off her notifications completely. She refuses to be distracted during Mock Trial.
She struts into room 1-176 gracefully enough, before dropping the act and dropping herself into her usual chair in the very back of the room next to an Aaron Burr whose nose is deep in a book.
"Hey, Angelica." He smiles, pleasantly, book immediately forgotten. "I really like your shirt, it brings out the color of your Black AMEX card. Also, your eyes."
"Burr, I'm not in the mood," is her grunted response.
Aaron's eyebrows furrow in confusion. "I thought we had a thing going on? I flirt with you, you act like you're not flattered, we laugh, and call it a day?"
"It's only the first week and you are like the twentieth guy that won't leave me alone. Don't test me, because I'm about to explode." She makes a motion with her hands miming said explosion, flailing around enough that Aaron catches the sweet smell of her perfume.
He makes a clicking sound with his teeth, and pouts sympathetically. "Oh...is this about Church?"
Angelica's eyes are wild. "Why does everyone keep bringing up Church? It's not important! He doesn't exist to me!"
"Who's Church?" Asks Alex, sliding into the seat next to her. She groans at the ceiling and silently begs for it to collapse on all of them. He quickly recognizes Aaron. "Whoa, hey man! I didn't know you went here."
"I could say the same for you. Since when--"
"Since Monday! I transferred."
"Ah, well, that's nice," is all Aaron says before returning to his book. Alex frowns. Okay then.
He’s about to delve into just why Aaron’s being so cold when Washington comes jogging into the room.
"Hey, everybody!" Calls Washington, who is more jovial than Alex has ever seen him. He has an extra pep in his step, which leads Alex to guess that perhaps he had gotten some really good news, or something. But, this assumption dies when the other members return the greeting with one just as casual, with some people even crying "G-Wash!"
The fuck?
"I am so excited to start yet another year of Mock Trial with you all. After our big 2nd place seeding last year, I am positive we can come back with enough power to finally knock Carta Magnet School down from 1st place. Who's with me?" This is answered with much applause from all of the former members, as the potential ones only clap quietly.
"To all of you who are here to test the waters of Mock Trial: welcome! You probably know me, since I teach at least one class in every grade, but if you don't, I'm George Washington, head of the social studies department. My office, if you have any questions after the meeting, is room 212." Alex's eyebrows rise as it dawns on him that the room he keeps getting invited to is actually Washington's. Does he know that his office is being used every day during 5th period? Would he be pissed?
"So, any of our veterans want to give some of the new kids a taste?"
As if the world wasn't already against him, Tom Jefferson is the first out of his chair, shoving past several freshmen as he makes his way to the front of the room. "How y'all doin'? Had a good day? Getting settled in here at Ashburton?" He directs these questions at the freshmen, and even seems to give a bit of an acknowledging nod towards Alex, before bellowing, "Well, not for long! You thought you'd be able to cruise through this year, maybe join a few clubs to make mommy and daddy proud. Think again! Mock Trial will ruin your life. Your social life is 100% done-zo. You hear me, piglets?! You ain't going to no parties this year! You're gonna have to get your drunken karaoke fix elsewhere." With this, six of the misinformed youths flee in horror. Where were they supposed to sing Spice Girls songs while tripping on acid now?
"Jefferson, please stop scaring the newcomers away."
"What?! I'm doing all y'all a civic duty. Everybody knows there can only be so many people to a team. If we needle down the fresh meat from the jump, tryouts are completely unnecessary!"
"Tryouts?" Alex whispers to Angelica, who sighs and whispers back that it should be explained eventually.
"Contrary to your opinion, the greatest analytical mind may be possessed by what you see as 'fresh meat'. Say, let's take...Hamilton, for example. Hamilton, you mind coming up?" Alex gulps but steps through the crowded room to where Washington is standing.
"Sir?"
"Hamilton here is quickly becoming one of my most...hm, let's say thorough students. He challenges almost everything I say. Though classes have only been in session long enough for me to have given out just one writing assignment in my AP Government class, Hamilton has shown exceptional hold over the English language." He tilts his head a little. "Not a very concise hold, but laudable nonetheless." "He has something to bring to this team that I don't think anyone else here has: real world experience. Hamilton, will you tell us about your time at the courthouse over the summer?"
"My what at the who?" Wait, he means the-- "Oh yeah, um. It was mostly filing, that kinda stuff. Nothing special, really."
"Who was your supervisor?"
"I, gosh, it was so long ago. I've never been good with remembering names--"
"I've known most of the folks at the courthouse for years. Describe them to me; I'll probably be able to put a name to the face."
Well shit. "Um, he was really...tall!" Alex scavenges his mind for some more generic descriptors. "Very official. Taught me a lot. He--"
"Wait, did this guy have an accent? Eastern European? He said he was in charge of some of the interns this year, but if it wasn't him it could have been Knox..."
"Sure," breaths out Alex.
Washington crosses his arms, completely zeroed in on Alex. "To who? Von Steuben--the friend I was telling you about, or Knox?"
"The first guy? I mean, yes definitely Von Steuben, how could I have forgotten!"
The teacher’s face breaks out into a full-on grin. "He's hilarious right?"
"He had us laughing for days, sir." Alex has no idea who “he” or “us” is, but rolls with it the phoniest way he knows how.
"Oh, I hope he didn't tell you the joke about the--"
Alex cuts him off with a "yeah, yeah!" And the two start laughing--not normal laughter, but the kind of laugh that you only hear Old Rich White Men™ make when they're joking about their trophy wives while playing golf. Or something.
God, I'm so fake, is all Alex can think as he wipes a nonexistent tear from his eye.
“Alright, enough of that,” Washington begins, a hint of laughter still in his oaky voice. He reaches into one of the drawers of his desk and emerges with stacks of papers. "Here are the case files, everyone. Now, for each team, there are a total of 12 members: Six attorneys, four eyewitnesses, and two expert witnesses. In Mock Trial, we divide in half to prepare as both the prosecution and the defense for a case. If you have a particular preference for which side you'd like to prepare for, just let me know." He scans the room, silently counting the heads. "Since it looks like there are twenty of us, tryouts will have to be held--"
"No they don't!" Jefferson interjects. He stares down the rest of the freshmen. "Scram, toddlers. There's always next year."
"Jefferson, you know that tryouts will be held just to decide who acts as attorney and who as witness, even if we have the exact amount of people."
"Can't we just draw straws like last year?"
"We could, but I think our performance at finals last year can attest to the fact that that wasn't the best idea."
"That was John mcfreaking Jay's fault! I told you I'd take his place, but—"
"Let's just stay on the safe side, this time, alright? I'm sure you'll be opening attorney again--"
"But, I don't want to open. I want to close,” Jefferson whines.
"Jefferson, please sit down, before I put you on probation again." Jefferson trudges back to his seat, muttering under his breath the whole way.
"Alright, notebooks out, everyone. Here's how tryouts are going to go: if you wish to be a witness, you’ll have to memorize and perform from a scripted testimony that I’ll be posting on the school website later tonight. For attorneys, it's a little bit harder, as you not only have to question a witness, but also give a speech of your own that is supposed to be reminiscent of an opening remark. I’ll post some topics tonight, also. Witnesses, your role on this team is almost entirely acting—mostly improv. You'll get a basic of outline of things to say--some information will be superfluous, some you'll need to emphasize. Though you can't make up anything—that's perjury—you should be able to infer and elaborate on some things. The attorneys on the opposing side will try to catch you on small inconsistencies, so you should be able to know your character inside and out." He exhales and cracks a small smile. "Attorneys, however, have it rough. There's no real guidelines for how you work. You have to know everything in that case file. Even if it doesn't seem important at the time, believe me, it will come up."
Washington clasps his hands behind his back and observes the students, studying their faces for any sort of reaction. "Tryouts will be held next Thursday, hopefully that will give you enough time to memorize your individual parts." He grabs his briefcase and holds the door open. "You can head on out, now. Remember, report back here next week with your materials!" Well, they definitely don’t need to be told twice, as everyone is up as soon as the words are out of his mouth.
"And, everyone, please don't listen to Jefferson. Though it is true that this club takes a lot of your time, you'll still be able to have a social life. However, I wouldn't recommend you--what is it that the kids say--'turn up' too much." This earns a groan from everyone as they file out of the room. He follows after them, leaving Angelica and Alex behind.
As Angelica is trying to follow the rest of the eager students out, Alex grabs her by the strap of her Vera Bradley backpack. "Angelica, you gotta help me."
She shakes off her initial irritation, suddenly alert. "What for? You in trouble? My dad won't let you hide out at our place but I know a guy--"
He grips both of her arms. What the hell. "What?! No, what are you talking about?"
Angelica blinks but leans back. "Nothing, please go on."
"I need you to help me with all this Mock Trial stuff. I don't know the first thing about law."
"But Washington was gushing over your experiences at the courthouse."
Alex wets his lips anxiously. "Yeah, that's the thing. I lied."
"Fucking hell, Alex," Angelica closes her eyes, trying to understand how she managed to befriend the human embodiment of the poo emoji.
"I know, right? I messed up. But you have to--"
A shuffling can be heard from the back of the room. Both Angelica and Alex's heads turn to the source of the sound, only to face the form of Aaron Burr.
"Holy shit, how long have you been there?!"
"I never left, idiot," Aaron deadpans.
"So..." Alex claps his hands together. "You heard all of that, I'm guessing."
"You'd be correct."
Angelica, bless her, steps in. "Burr, say a word about this, and I'll tell everyone about that one time you set yourself on fire during our extra credit chem assignment two years ago."
"Wait, what?" Alex asks, because wait, what.
"I swore you to secrecy, Angelica!"
"And, I'm swearing you to secrecy now. Take it or leave it, Burr."
"This is nonsense. I've been in this club for years, trying to earn Washington's approval, and this hack decides he can waltz in and steal the glory for himself because Washington's gullible?"
Alex is ready to pop off. "Who you callin' a hack, you nosy little--"
"I'm calling you a hack. You're a liar. You lied.
"Okay, I get it, jeeze. It's not that big of a deal, really."
"Whatever," Aaron mutters as he marches through the threshold of the door.
Alex refuses to let him go that quickly though, as he yells out, "Don't tell anyone, or I'll tell your foster mom that you were bullying me!" He stomps his foot like a child, not noticing Angelica's inquiring look.
"You know his foster mom?"
Alex calms, slightly. "Yeah, she works at the salon. You'd know her if you saw her. I'm pretty sure she's done your hair before."
"Is she the one that always wears really strong old lady perfume?"
"Yeah! She only smells like that because she comes to the salon as soon as her shift at the nursing home is over. She's really nice--I have no idea how she can even stand Burr."
"Burr's a kiss-up, that's why. All smiles and compliments around adults, but as soon as they turn their back, he goes into full pretentious asshole mode."
Alex rubs his sweaty hands together, and paces in front of Washington's desk. "You don't think he'll tell nobody, right? You saw how cool me and Washington were up there; if he finds out that I was lying about everything he'll disown me as his favorite."
"Burr's not the type to snitch," she grimaces to herself before saying, "Alright, he is, but not unless its immediately beneficial to him. Sure, if he tells on you, you get kicked out, but it doesn't really do much for him, does it?" She steps in front of the still pacing boy, stopping him in his tracks. "But, who said you're his favorite? What if I'm his favorite, huh?"
"Ange...sis...you didn't speak the entire meeting..."
"Washington likes it when we save the talking for when we're in court. Speaking of which, you're really clueless about how all this stuff works, then, right?"
"No need to rub it in, but yes." He hoists up the heavy stack of paper in his hands. "Is this much paper necessary? Isn't this school supposed to be going green, or whatever?"
"For all the good Washington's done, he doesn't give a single shit about the environment. One year, we made a drinking game out of how many times we caught him littering on the drive from the courthouse." She elaborates with, "We always go out to Subway after a meet, and every single time, he throws the entire bag out the window. One time, it hit a cop's windshield." She sighs, fondly. "And, that is how I watched one of my teachers almost get arrested. Good times."
"That's great, really, but how am I supposed to survive this?"
"Jeeze, calm down Peach Fuzz. Here, you can swing by my place after school tomorrow and I can brief you on all things Mock Trial, 'kay? Will that make you feel better, babyface?"
"Oh, my god, quit it with the petnames!" He's about to storm off from Angelica's howls of laughter when he remembers something. "Wait, uh, I gotta thing after school tomorrow. It shouldn't be too long, but can we maybe push our thing back to Saturday?"
She agrees, albeit begrudgingly, and bids him adieu with yet another sloppy kiss, this time on the forehead. Though he wants to be annoyed, he knows he'd probably be dead without her, so instead he takes it like a champ.
Once he's in the hallway, he's greeted by his new friends (are they that cool yet? He's never had a group of friends before--he doesn't know the logistics just yet), who all but tackle him.
Hercules is cooing, which sounds really weird coming out of his mouth. "Ooh, Alex got a date! And with Angelica Schuyler! How you only been here for a week and already snatching up all the good ass?" Hercules fumbles when he sees Lafayette's unimpressed face. "But everyone knows I got the best ass of them all right here!"
Lafayette rolls their eyes. "Yeah, so anyway. Alex, why didn't you tell us you were associating with Angelica? Were you trying to keep it on the, ahem, DL?"
Alex ignores the question, overcome with mild disgust. "Holy shit, Lafayette, no one says that anymore. No one."
John jumps in with, "I'm pretty sure Hillary Clinton used it once in an attempt to look 'with it'."
"No one says that either, John," he says lightly, but when he finally chances a look at him he's instantly taken aback by how dejected his friend looks. "What's wrong?"
"Ah, nothing, I'm great! Just nervous for auditions tomorrow. I always get pre-auditions jitters."
Lafayette sweeps over with an arm around the shoulder. "There is nothing to be afraid of, mon pote. You have got this! I will be honest with you, I tend to play favorites."
Hercules grumbles something under his breath, which earns him a glare from Lafayette. He presses his lips together as if it's killing him not to say something. He decides to say, "I'm hungry, y'all wanna go chill by McDonald's? I'd say my treat, but there's no way in hell I'm paying for any of y'all's asses." Again, another unimpressed look from Lafayette. "Except yours, of course. I'd buy you every French fry money can buy, my frenchiest fry."
"How romantic," they growl before shaking Hercules' arm off of their back.
John nods, ignoring the clear tension in the air. "Hold up, just let me get something out of my locker real quick."
"Cool, meet us outside by my car," Hercules instructs, still looking at his seething French friend. Alex starts off toward the front steps of the school, wanting to get rid of the award vibes before they're stuck in a car for God knows how long. The two follow him, silent up until they reach the parking lot across the street where Hercules' green Chevy waits.
He takes out his keys to unlock the doors, the unlock button sticking a little. "So, you and Angelica, huh?"
"No, nuh-uh, never. Okay, I thought about it, but that was forever and a half ago. We're just working on Mock Trial stuff together, is all. I can't think of anything more platonic than that." He slides into the backseat, not even flinching at the burning material of the seats like Lafayette and Hercules are. "Could you imagine, though? Me and Angelica going out? That'd be crazy--she'd never see me that way."
"True, Angelica Schuyler's got mad standards."
"Exactly!" A beat. "Hey, what's that supposed to mean?" Hercules answers this with a wink through the rearview mirror, causing Alex to snort.
Lafayette twiddles their thumbs for a bit, giving quick looks out of the window before blurting out, "You should tell John that there's nothing between you two, then."
"Oh, okay. Mind telling me why?"
"You just," they knock their head on the back of the seat. "Should. He'll be...relieved."
"Oh," Alex mutters. That explained why he had looked so upset back in the hallway. Did he like Angelica? Alex can't help but think that they'd be perfect for each other. Angelica with her wit and John with his thoughtfulness, combined with both of their unwavering compassion. They'd balance each other out, and they'd definitely be the school's most attractive couple.
Alex wants to throw himself off a cliff. Maybe I should set them up? That's what a good friend would do, right?
But, he doesn't feel like being a good friend. He feels like being a selfish brat with a huge, stupid, completely unrealistic crush on John Laurens
Speaking of the devil, John comes bounding out of the school with his backpack hanging off of his shoulders. He gets the backseat door open, and plops into the seat next to Alex with as much grace as a dog after finally being released from his cage.
"Micky D's, here we come!" He says with the excitement of someone who hasn't had chicken nuggets in a while.
The ride across town is fairly uneventful, though certainly longer than expected. Seeing that the school isn't located in the inner city, and thus, not surrounded by a fast-food restaurant on every corner, the closest McDonald's is almost twenty minutes away. In the meantime, Lafayette has control of the aux cord, and is blasting a mix of 70's disco hits and Busta Rhymes. What's most surprising about this is the fact that Laf actually keeps up with the fast rapping, which is strange for someone who usually takes it slow when it comes to the English language.
Once they reach the dining establishment, Hercules turns down the radio (much to Lafayette's chagrin) and queries, "So, we eating inside or should we eat in the parking lot? I don't care which, as long as none of you leave a mess in my car."
"I read somewhere that fast food places purposefully make the indoor atmosphere uncomfortable, so people don't want to stay and eat for long. That's why the chairs are always so hard and the entire place smells like a restroom. It's all part of this weird efficiency complex America has." John says instead of actually answering the question. Alex takes in his words with awe, refraining from thinking "my boyfriend is sooo smart", because really, that'd just be weird.
Hercules eyes John through the mirror but nonetheless pulls up to the speaker. "You could've just said 'nah, I think eating inside's gross" but I feel you." A voice begging for them to take their order crackles through the speaker. "Quick, what do you guys want?"
Lafayette huffs. "You know I hate this place, cher."
"Then, why didn't you tell me before I wasted my gas driving here?!"
"Because, I was waiting for you to come to your senses. I have told you a thousand times that the food here is poisonous!"
"We've been over this, babe--"
"Do not 'babe' me, I'm mad at you."
"What?! Why? What did I do?"
"Forgetting I detest McDonald's, calling Angelica Schuyler 'good ass'--"
"Whoa, you're still pressed about that? You know I didn't mean it--"
"Hello? Can I take your order!" Shouts the overworked cashier. Alex and John share a look.
"And, then there's the fact that you did not save a seat for me this morning in Stat. You let that André guy take my seat that I have been sitting in all week--
"What was I supposed to do?
The cashier interjects again. "Listen folks, I really don't care about your drama, but if you don't give me your order in the next five seconds, I'm gonna have to ask you to leave."
Alex pokes his head between the fighting pair. "Yo, guys, I think this can be better settled in the parking lot."
"Oh, yeah you right, you right." Hercules pulls out of the growing line, much to the relief of the cashier and the three cars behind him. When they eventually pull into a spot underneath the shade of a tree, the chaos continues in full force.
"I see the way he looks at you. It is obscene."
"He looks at everyone that way. I even saw him checking out Eliza Schuyler during Art. No one gets away with checking out Eliza Schuyler."
This catches Alex's attention, and he leans forward in his seat. "How come?"
"One word: Angelica. Ever since last year--"
"What happened last year?"
"Do not change the subject, Herc! You still should not have let him take my seat! You know how territorial I am."
"Oh, believe me, I know," Hercules mutters, which incites a loud scoff from Lafayette. John groans at this, and nudges Alex in his side.
"You wanna just get our food and hope that they've kissed and made up by the time we come back?" He provides in a low voice that sends shivers down Alex's spine.
"Please and thank you." They sneak out of the car with ease.
John had been very right about the inside conditions of the restaurant. It smells like a nauseating mix of grease, more grease, and ass.
They reach the counter and Alex eyes his friend. "You wanna just share a 20-piece nugget meal?"
"Sure, with hella fries, right?" Suggest John, who is looking at the lit up menu above them in wonderment.
"Why else would we be here if it wasn't for hella fries?"
When they order, Alex intercepts the transaction by handing the cashier some bills from his last payday. He knows its going to be harder to make money now that summer is over, and his hours at the salon are shorter. But, it's entirely worth the open-mouthed look John gives him that quickly morphs into an amused grin.
"You really had to pay me back, didn't you?"
"I hate feeling like I owe people something."
"Don't feel like you ever owe me anything, man." And if that sentences doesn't feel like it has a certain weight to it, Alex doesn't know what to do.
They sit down on the (of course) much-too hard chairs as they wait for their order.
"So...what's the deal with Herc and Laf?"
"Oh, they've been bickering since this morning. I'm pretty sure it's because they're both so stressed out with auditions coming up. The school isn't helping them at all with Little Shop. And the theater department head has been breathing down their necks about every little thing. They're just taking the frustration out on each other."
"No, I got that. Well, sorta." He coughs. "I was wondering what they, y'know...are? To each other?"
"Oh! They're together. Laf told me they've been official since their sophomore year. Um, you don't mind do you?"
"Why would I mind? I'm..." He pauses. He's never really said it out loud before, never really got the chance to, but-- "I'm bi. I don't have a problem with Lafayette and Herc's thing. I get it."
"Oh," John breathes. A sudden serenity takes over his facial features, the corners of his lips are rising, and his eyes are crinkling with a joy that Alex didn't expect. "That's awesome, man. Both things. Uh," he runs a hand through his locs, and makes a face as if he wants to ask something, but decides against it. Instead, he goes, "That's cool. Are you out?"
Now it's time for Alex to falter. "Not really? It never comes up in conversation, so it's not like I've had the opportunity to just come out with it. But," he picks at the corners of his nails, avoiding looking at John's face lit up with glee. "If anyone ever asks, I'm not gonna lie, or anything."
"So...I'm the only one who knows?"
"Yep," he huffs out a laugh. "Congratulations, you should be honored."
"I am," John replies, earnestly, and that just about fucks Alex up into oblivion.
Luckily, before Alex does something really stupid, the cashier calls their order and the two boys grab their food to take to the car.
However, they both come to a halt when they're about a yard in front of the vehicle, and catch Hercules and Lafayette feverishly making out across the front seats. Hercules' hands are digging into Lafayette's curly mane, their scrunchie clearly lost in the commotion. Laf's hands are sliding down Hercules' torso, down to a place that the other two really don't feel like knowing about.
They quickly sprint back inside of the building.
"That was..." John's face is completely wiped blank.
"Well, you did say you wanted them to kiss and make up."
"Yeah, but not like that." He eventually opens the bag and places the nuggets and fries on the sticky table. They eat in silence for a while, until John says, "I guess it's fair that I tell you that I'm pan, then? Since you told me about you, and all."
"Oh, sweet. Suppose me, you, and the lovebirds could form a club."
"Ha, yeah, no. Those two would just spend the whole meeting time giving each other bedroom eyes."
Alex chuckles fondly. He stuffs a handful of fries in his mouth, swallows, and musters up the strength to say, "Since we're being honest, I'll just come right out and say it: Angelica and I aren't a thing. At all. And we probably never will be, if that's any comfort to you." John stiffens and the atmosphere of peace is immediately sucked out of the room.
"Why would that be--no I don't." John drops the nugget in his hand into his lap. "You know, don't you?"
"Yeah, listen, I'm cool with it."
"But, you don't like it."
Shit, had he been caught? Did he know that the thought of him and Angelica being perfect together made his skin crawl? Well, he was already being honest, so. "I don't. Sorry." He scrubs a hand over his face. "I made things weird, didn't I?"
"No! No, it was me. I shouldn't have been so obvious."
"You weren't being obvious at all! I didn't even know until Lafayette told me."
"Wait, what?! I told them not to breathe a word of this to you and they still--Jesus, fuck."
"I'm sure they meant well--"
"Whatever, it's...whatever." He slumps down impossibly lower into his seat. "We can still be friends, right?"
"Why wouldn't we still be friends? It's not that big of a deal to me."
"Wow, okay. Yeah. Good." He stuffs his hands into jean pockets--thank heavens he finally caught on to public school dress codes--and stands up. "I'm gonna go make Hercules stop sucking Lafayette's face off long enough to drive us home, okay?"
"Yeah, okay." And with that, John's out the door.
Alex looks down at his half eaten food, and takes in the strength of the grease in the air. He pushes it all away and drops his head down onto the table.
He doesn't have much of an appetite anymore.